"I did not give him permission to do that, Jiraiya," Tsunade said, her voice dropping to a terrifyingly calm whisper.
A prominent, throbbing vein popped out on her forehead. Despite the sweet, closed-eye smile gracing her features, a suffocating, pitch-black aura of pure malice began to radiate from the Hokage's chair.
"And I will not have Naruto become a playboy who plays with innocent girls' hearts," Tsunade continued, her fingers slowly crushing the edges of her wooden desk into splinters. "After he gets back from this mission, I am going to have quite a... chat... with that boy."
Jiraiya visibly paled, sinking slightly into the windowsill. He held his hands up in a placating gesture. "Just... make sure you don't actually kill the kid, Tsunade. I'm pretty sure Kushina wouldn't appreciate you turning her son into a paste."
"Oh, please," Tsunade scoffed, the black aura receding just a fraction. "Kushina would be the first one in line to beat the absolute shit out of him if he tried to become some sleazy playboy. You remember what happened to the first boy who tried to play with Yugao's heart, don't you?"
Jiraiya shuddered, a phantom pain echoing in his own limbs. "Yeah. How could I forget? The kid had both his arms and legs broken in three different places."
"Tsunade-sama... I would also like to be included in that chat," a smooth, calm voice echoed from the shadows near the office door.
Tsunade didn't even flinch or turn around. "Come in and join us, Yugao."
Stepping out of the shadows was Yugao Uzuki, the newly appointed Commander of the Anbu Black Ops.
Her record was as heavy and blood-stained as Kakashi Hatake's. While Kakashi had the crushing pressure of being the White Fang's son and the Fourth Hokage's sole surviving student, Yugao's own pedigree was nothing to scoff at. As the undisputed Kenjutsu prodigy of her generation in the Academy, she had effortlessly outclassed peers like Rin Nohara, Kurenai Yuhi, and even Anko Mitarashi in direct, armed combat.
Her lethal efficiency and unyielding spirit had caught the eye of Kushina Uzumaki, who took the girl under her wing and forged her into an absolute powerhouse. In many ways, Yugao and Kakashi were the closest things Naruto had to elder siblings. Back when Naruto was just an isolated, hated child wandering the village, the two Anbu operatives had silently watched over him from the rooftops, bound by the memories of their respective masters.
Yugao reached up and unclasped her porcelain Anbu mask, letting it hang loosely from her hip. She walked over to the small table and graciously accepted a cup of tea from Shizune.
"So," Yugao murmured, taking a delicate sip. "What exactly has our little maverick done recently? And what is this I hear about him playing with girls' hearts?"
Tsunade sighed, massaging her temples once more. "Oh, nothing much. Just that he completely hijacked an S-rank extraction mission from Yamato at the main gates and declared himself the absolute Captain of the team."
Yugao raised an eyebrow over the rim of her teacup. 'Impressive,' she thought, though she kept her face neutral.
"And before that," Tsunade continued, ticking the offenses off on her fingers, "after he successfully saved the Kazekage, he and Temari of the Sand apparently had quite the romantic night together. And then, just a few days ago, he had a private meeting with Hinata and Ino. We don't know exactly what he promised them, but both girls are suddenly violently eager to become A-rank Jonin within the next six months."
"Ah, yes. I heard about that from Anko," Yugao said, a faint, genuine smile touching her lips. "Honestly? I'm quite proud. Those two have been training seriously for the last three years, but Anko told me they have a completely new fire in them now. They are fighting like they have something to prove."
"Yeah," Shizune chimed in, pouring more tea. "It's like they are desperate to learn the secret to something. Naruto promised them a reward, but we have no idea what that secret could possibly be."
Jiraiya, having recovered from Tsunade's killing intent, leaned back against the window frame and barked out a laugh.
"Maybe the brat finally cracked the ultimate secret," Jiraiya chuckled. "The secret to defeating paperwork."
Instantly, the room went dead silent.
Tsunade, Shizune, and Yugao all slowly turned their heads to stare at the Toad Sage. Their eyes were wide, completely devoid of humor, staring at him with a terrifying, absolute seriousness.
Jiraiya blinked, slightly unnerved by the triple death-stare. "Uh... you guys are serious, right? You don't actually think he knows how to beat paperwork?"
"Does he know?" Tsunade demanded, her voice entirely devoid of sarcasm.
"How the hell would I know?!" Jiraiya defended himself, throwing his hands up. "If I had known the secret to defeating paperwork, I wouldn't be out wandering the continent desperate for 'research' material! I could have been sitting right here in the village, efficiently managing my time, and I could have published three or four more Icha Icha volumes by now!"
All three women stared at him, utterly dumbfounded. Here was the legendary Toad Sage, contemplating the greatest, most impossible jutsu in the history of the Kage—the eradication of administrative logistics—and his only thought was how it could help him write more smut.
But despite Jiraiya's perverted priorities, a heavy silence fell over the room once more as the three kunoichi looked toward the towering stacks of mission reports on the desk. Because in the shinobi world, rogue ninjas, tailed beasts, and criminal syndicates came and went.
But the paperwork... the paperwork was eternal.
Author's Note
Hey everyone!
I need a little help from you all. Since I'm not much of an artist, I'd really appreciate it if you could share or comment pictures of outfits you think would suit the characters.
I'm especially looking for outfit ideas for:
Naruto
Hinata
Ino
Temari
And any other characters you'd like to see redesigned.
Feel free to post as many references as you want. Casual clothes, mission outfits, formal wear, seasonal outfits, or anything else you think fits their personalities.
Your suggestions will really help me visualize the characters and make the story even better.
Thanks for all the support, and I can't wait to see your ideas!