Chapter 393: What's Wrong With A Man Liking Big Boobs?
"Yo~ Isn't that Hikigaya-senpai?
What a coincidence!"
Housen Kazuomi walked toward Hachiman with his hands in his pockets, sporting an arrogant, self-important swagger.
"!"
Shibata Souta stepped forward, spreading his arms to block Hachiman's path.
"Hey, hey~ This pretty-boy senpai, is your eyesight not so great?"
Housen wore undisguised contempt on his face. There was a significant height difference between the two; Housen was over 1.90 meters tall, while Shibata stood at 1.70 meters (with shoes), making it easy for onlookers to mistake the former for the senpai.
"Violence is strictly prohibited!" Shibata raised his head, staring firmly into Housen's eyes. "If you do this, we'll call the senseis!"
Amikura Mako and Himeno Yuki stepped forward, standing side-by-side with Shibata. While they didn't look like they possessed much combat capability, they at least had enough spirit.
This left Housen quite surprised. Logically, most people would subconsciously shrink back when faced with his hulking frame. It was baffling that this one weak-looking boy and two girls dared to stand in his way.
"Shibata, Amikura, Himeno, you don't need to be so tense," Hachiman said in a flat tone, tinged with careless mockery. "Housen-kouhai is just feeling lonely and couldn't help but come over to chat with his senpais."
"..."
The scene fell into a weird silence.
Several black lines appeared on Housen's forehead. He muttered to himself, 'This dead-fish-eyed guy's ability to make up lies is top-tier!'
"Eh?"
"Is that true?"
"So that's how it is... I didn't expect Housen-kouhai to have such a shy side. We were wrong; we shouldn't judge people by appearances."
Watching Shibata and the others shift from initial hostility to looks of concern, the veins on Housen's forehead began to bulge.
"Are you bastards stupid!!"
Housen cursed loudly. Just as he couldn't help but move to strike, his peripheral vision caught the teachers at the base camp staring at him sternly.
Housen had no choice but to forcefully swallow his anger. He left behind a weak threat: "Hikigaya-senpai, you'd better not sleep too soundly tonight!"
"What's wrong, Housen-kouhai?" Hachiman mocked him again. "Are you afraid of the dark and want to move your tent over here?"
Hearing this, Housen's expression became strained. Realizing he couldn't win against the other with words, he had no choice but to turn around and leave, face darkened with frustration.
Half an hour later, the other groups arrived at the D6 base point.
"Time is up!" the supervising teacher announced. "Now, we announce the D6 assignment: [Cooking Competition]."
"The rules require each group of 1 to 3 people to use the provided ingredients to finish a dish. The judges will conduct a blind taste test to determine the scores."
As soon as he finished, Amikura Mako actively raised her hand: "May I ask if we can eat the remaining ingredients ourselves after finishing the dish?"
"Yes, you can."
Upon receiving the confirmation, the students were overjoyed. This meant everyone could save on points and wouldn't need to redeem extra food.
"Um... sorry, I'm actually not very good at cooking," Shibata scratched his head, looking embarrassed.
"It's okay, everyone has things they aren't good at," Amikura said, her tone remaining gentle and soothing.
Himeno Yuki turned to Hachiman, who was preparing to participate alone, and asked, "Hey, Hikigaya, can you cook?"
"I know a little." Hachiman responded casually.
"Oh, then join us." Himeno said, "Consider it paying back the favor for you saving me today."
Without waiting for his response, Himeno walked straight to the registration desk and wrote down her name, Amikura Mako's, and Hachiman's.
"Not really... I never said I agreed... Sigh, whatever." Hachiman sighed helplessly. Thinking it wasn't any real trouble, he didn't decline.
"Don't worry, Hikigaya-kun. Himeno-san and I are quite good at cooking; you just need to help us with the prep work."
A moment later, the two girls stood frozen, staring at the sight before them.
Hachiman was holding a heavy iron wok steadily in one hand while nimbly tossing ingredients with the other. His movements were fluid and professional, looking exactly like a master chef.
"Hikigaya-kun... do you call this 'knowing a little'?"
Originally, the two girls planned to take on the roles of head chefs, but the camp provided heavy iron woks—completely different from the light pans used in class—and they couldn't handle them. With no other choice, they had to yield the chef's position to Hachiman and settled for washing and chopping vegetables.
"Hmph, it's nothing but a small trick." Hachiman lifted his chin, his face showing a hint of pride. "This is an essential skill for becoming a future house-husband!"
"House-husband? That... Hikigaya-kun's dream is really quite unique."
"I think it's great! In the future, he can make rich dinners for Ichinose-san; she'll definitely be very happy!" Shibata said with anticipation.
"Why wouldn't Honami come home after work to make a rich dinner for me?" Hachiman retorted seriously.
"Tch, are you planning to live off a woman's salary while acting tough?" Himeno gave him a look of slight disdain.
"Eh-to~ That's too much. Hikigaya-kun, you're joking, right?" Amikura Mako had a bead of cold sweat on her forehead.
"I'm not joking."
Hachiman narrowed his signature dead-fish eyes, images from his dreams surfacing involuntarily. According to his dream life after marrying Honami, she became a civil servant after graduation, while he stayed home playing the stock market and taking care of their triplets. Considering it was hard for one person to look after three kids, Honami would take the initiative to shop and cook every day after work.
The judges finished scoring.
"First place in this cooking competition: Housen Kazuomi!"
"Eh—?!"
"First place is actually that Housen guy?"
All the D6 students cast looks of disbelief.
"Tch! A bunch of idiots...!"
Taking first place, Housen not only felt no joy, but his face looked awkward and even embarrassed. He deliberately raised his voice to justify himself: "Don't misunderstand! I just helped out at a street food market before, and I learned a few things while I was at it!"
People were half-believing, thinking the explanation was a bit of a stretch. However, to Hachiman, the other's cooking movements were skilled and seasoned; it wasn't the kind of thing you could learn by just "watching for a bit." He likely had to manage his own three meals a day usually.
Going one step further in his imagination: Housen Kazuomi was in a rebellious phase, refused his parents' discipline, chose to run away from home, and got mixed up in society early, forcing him to learn life skills.
All of that was pure speculation. Hachiman had no interest in exploring others' pasts.
Second place went to Hachiman's group.
With that, the first day of the uninhabited island exam ended.
Hachiman took his tablet out of his backpack to check his score.
Initial points: 20 - 10 Movement score: 1 + 10 + 3 + 10 Task score: 10 + 0 + 3 + 5 Total: 52 points Rank: 39th
Considering it was the first day and everyone had plenty of energy, making it hard to widen the gap, Hachiman was satisfied with his current ranking.
Night fell, and the groups began setting up tents.
"Hikigaya-kun, let's put our tents together." Shibata hinted towards Housen, who was camping under a tree not far away. As a smart guy, he could naturally see the major conflict between Hachiman and Housen.
"Sure." Hachiman accepted the favor after a moment of thought.
The four of them had three tents set up in an equilateral triangle.
"Oyasumi~ Hikigaya-kun and Shibata-kun." After the two girls said goodnight, they squeezed into the same tent.
"Hikigaya-kun, if you can't sleep, would you mind talking to me about love?"
"Why are you suddenly bringing this up..."
Hachiman yawned; he really wanted to say he was exhausted and didn't want to talk about this topic.
"Onegaishimasu, Master of Love Hikigaya!" Shibata pressed his hands together and bowed ninety degrees.
"Master of Love or whatever, I'm begging you, don't call me that!" Hachiman's mouth twitched violently.
"Okay... then I'll call you God of Love?"
"Shibata, if you keep pestering me, I'll dismantle your tent and let you feed the mosquitoes in the open air tonight!"
"Scary! Are you a devil?" Shibata's expression tightened. After a pause, he started the main topic: "Recently, I found a girl in the class... um, she seems to like me..."
"You mean Ando-san, right?"
"Eh, eh! How did you know?"
"Anyone with eyes can tell."
"..." Shibata looked embarrassed, not knowing what to say.
"Then do you like her?" Hachiman asked.
"This, I... I don't know..." Shibata stammered, his face showing both joy and confusion.
"Let me rephrase: When you're with Ando-san, do you feel happy?"
"Yes! Ando-san often comes to the soccer club to watch me play." Shibata's eyes flashed with a hint of brilliance. "I also go to the volleyball club to watch her. Watching Ando-san sweating... she's really charming!"
"Mm, that's liking her." Hachiman unscrewed his water bottle. "As for whether it reaches the level of love, that depends on your further interactions."
"Interactions... huh?" Shibata looked at his own hands and suddenly blurted out: "I want to knead Ando-san's boobs!"
"Pfft!" Hachiman spat out a mouthful of water, staring at the other with a weird expression. "Cough-cough! Shibata-kun, this thought of yours..."
"Is my thought strange?" Shibata looked up at him with a pure expression. "The girls around Hikigaya-kun are obviously all big-chested."
"Th-that's just a coincidence..." Hachiman argued. "Besides, there are several who aren't!"
"That just means you're a flirt." Shibata put his fist over his heart and said righteously, "What's wrong with a man liking big boobs?!"
"Hey... don't say it so loudly." Hachiman lowered his voice, casting a glance at the girls' tent. He noticed two slightly raised bumps on the tent fabric, looking as if the two girls had their heads pressed against it to eavesdrop...
'Shibata, my bro, watch out for your reputation plummeting!'
To prevent further outrageous statements, Hachiman forcefully ended the conversation and returned to his tent.
In the dead of night, all the lights in the base area were extinguished, leaving everything in total darkness. Hachiman kept his guard up, wary of Housen coming to cause trouble, so his sleep was light.
Swish—
Footsteps were exceptionally clear in the silent night.
Hachiman, in a half-asleep state, snapped his eyes open.
'Finally here?'
He felt alert and carefully pulled a slit in the tent zipper. A sneaky figure was circling their three tents. After a while, the figure left with quick, hurried steps.
Hachiman grew suspicious and decided to follow, at least to confirm the person's identity!
"Eh? That figure, it doesn't look like Housen..." Hachiman stared intensely at the back. Although it was dark, through the moonlight, he could vaguely tell the figure was petite; it should be a girl.
However, Hachiman didn't let his guard down just because it was a girl. After all, this school had monsters like Housen, Amasawa Ichika, and Nanase Tsubasa!
What surprised him was that the girl didn't run towards the base area, but instead headed to a remote bush and crouched down...
'This... is she ambushing someone?'
Hachiman narrowed his eyes, keenly smelling a conspiracy! He crouched, cat-footed, and moved quietly towards the bushes. He sniffed the air... Hmm? What is this smell?
Before he could react, the girl in the bush suddenly stood up. Moonlight shone on a white, peach-like sight. Hachiman's expression stiffened; his breath caught.
"Huu~ Watering the flowers alone, nothing to be afraid of..."
The girl bent down to pull up her pants and turned around.
The two made eye contact; they could see each other's faces clearly at close range. Amikura Mako was so scared her pupils contracted, but after seeing who it was, she sighed in relief.
But she soon realized that her squatting in the bushes had been completely exposed to him! Her fair cheeks visibly heated up. She opened her mouth, about to let out a scream!
Hachiman moved with lightning speed, lunging forward and covering her mouth with one hand.
"Mmph-mmph!"
Amikura was caught off guard and pushed to the ground.
"Shh!"
"Don't speak, there's a situation!"
Hachiman firmly covered her mouth with one hand and pressed her to the ground with the other.
"???"
Amikura's face lost its color, and she was about to struggle. Not far away, a voice came.
"Too slow! Amasawa, if you don't bring me valuable information, don't blame me for being rude to you!"
"Ara~ Housen-kun, is that the attitude of someone asking for help?"
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