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Now that was a good question.
Harry immediately fell deep into thought.
Bloody hell, you're supposed to give people presents for Christmas?
I've never gotten one in my life!
Malfoy cleared his throat. "This is a very simple question."
He puffed himself up with pride, looking for all the world like a seasoned expert who regularly received mountains of gifts. "Listen here, Tom Riddle. First off, is the person you're giving this gift to a boy or a girl?"
"A boy."
In perfect unison, Malfoy and Harry let out a sigh of relief.
Thank goodness it's not a girl. If it were a girl, it would definitely be Hermione.
A boy... It must be one of Tom's roommates, right?
Harry actually wanted to offer some advice he'd read in a book, but seeing Malfoy gearing up to speak, he kept his mouth shut.
"Listen, Riddle, this is a very, very simple issue. Let me ask you this: what do you like?"
"Potions, knowledge, and pulling pranks on people," Hermione answered without a second's hesitation.
"..."
Malfoy looked baffled. "Are you messing with me? I'm asking what kind of things you like. Objects, you know? Objects!
"For example... think about what Hermione likes."
Hermione pondered for a moment. "Otters? Otters are Hermione's favorite animal. If it had to be something else, maybe a signature from Mr. Lockhart. And also... she could probably use a really smooth comb. It would make waking up every morning a lot less painful."
Harry and Malfoy silently mentally noted down this crucial intel.
"Good, just like that. So, what do you like?"
"I don't have anything I like," Hermione stated flatly. "Or rather, I don't know what I like. I don't have any objects like that. Harry, Malfoy, what do you two like?"
Malfoy instantly puffed his chest out. "I like belts. Top-tier leather, preferably. It makes me look very sophisticated."
Harry shook his head. "Actually, I don't really have anything special I like either. But if I had to pick... maybe a new pair of glasses. I've been wearing these for a long time."
"Thank you. I understand."
Belts. Glasses. Things people wore or used.
Hermione thanked the two of them and quickly took off.
She needed to go find the guys who knew everything.
The Weasley twins.
They always had a way of getting their hands on all sorts of magical, weird, and wonderful things—a fact that was basically an open secret among the student body.
"George! Fred!"
The Weasley twins were easy to track down. You just had to grab a random Gryffindor student and ask; most of the time, the twins spawned in their common room.
They weren't disliked, so plenty of people were happy to pass along a message. Sure enough, soon after, two identical boys with flaming red hair strolled out.
"Tom! Long time no see."
"Heh, looks like you've run into some trouble. Shoot!" George put his hands on his hips. "Or... do we need to take this somewhere else?" The corridor was a bit crowded, and George arched an eyebrow knowingly.
"Yes, we do. I really need your help!"
...
After finding a quiet spot, the three of them sat down with cups of jasmine green tea. George listened to Hermione's request and nodded slowly.
"I see. A Christmas present, huh? Tsk tsk, that is a brain-buster.
"But don't worry, we'll get it sorted."
Hope flooded back into Hermione's eyes. "That's brilliant! Can you do it quickly? I need it tonight... no, tomorrow morning at the latest. You know Christmas is almost here, and I'm really worried I won't have it in time."
"No problem at all, but..."
Fred cut in smoothly: "It'll cost extra!"
"That's fine. Tomorrow, just hand the item directly to Hermione. Hermione will pay you the Galleons. Money isn't an issue."
George and Fred looked confused. "Hermione? You're giving it to her? But what does she need stuff like this for?"
"No, Hermione asked me to look into this for her. I'm just the middleman. Anyway, I'm counting on you two."
Hermione stood up and gave them a deep, formal bow.
She prayed this wouldn't get messed up. She couldn't bear the thought of Tom sulking for a whole day because he didn't get a present he liked.
"Small potatoes. We're friends, partners in crime! This is what we do.
"But... I'd suggest you tell Hermione to come pick it out with us. After all, a gift means the most when you choose it yourself."
Fred nodded in agreement. "A Christmas present is a very solemn 'ritual.' On this day, only really close friends exchange gifts. We heard Hermione didn't have many friends before. This is probably her first time ever giving a gift to a friend. If her very first time isn't something she picked out herself... she's definitely going to regret it later."
"Then..." Hermione tentatively asked, "After midnight tonight, would that work?"
"A bit tricky, but doable. But... will Hermione actually come out at that time?"
In Fred and George's eyes, Hermione was the ultimate goodie-two-shoes. Sneaking out after midnight meant breaking curfew—a serious rule violation.
They honestly didn't think she had it in her.
"She can. Tonight at midnight. We... I mean, I'll have Hermione wait for you outside the Gryffindor entrance."
"Let's change the spot. That area is too risky. Old Filch is always prowling around there with Mrs. Norris; it's too easy to get caught. Let's do this... We'll meet at the Slytherin dormitory entrance. Filch rarely goes down there. Be there at exactly a quarter past midnight."
"Got it!"
Hermione let out a huge sigh of relief.
Problem solved.
The wait, however, felt agonizingly long.
Hermione went to bed early that night. She sat on her mattress, staring at her book, but the words had entirely lost their flavor. She couldn't focus on a single sentence. Her eyes kept darting to the ticking clock nearby.
Five o'clock, six o'clock, seven o'clock...
After dinner, she came right back to her vigil.
It was so obvious that even her roommates, Sue Li and Terry, noticed something was off.
"Tom, you seem... really obsessed with the time today?"
"D-do I?" Hermione coughed nervously. "It's just your imagination."
Terry wasn't so easily fooled. He snorted. "I know what it is. You're definitely waiting to sneak out after curfew, aren't you? Christmas is coming up, Tom. You're in for a lot of trouble."
"Trouble?" Hermione had no idea what he meant.
"Of course you are. Think about it..." Terry started ticking off names on his fingers. "Professor Snape is always so good to you; you have to get him a present. Professor Sprout treats you like her own son; you need to get her something too.
"Then there's... Hermione, Senior Cho, Professor Dumbledore..."
Hermione's head started spinning just hearing all those names.
Just thinking about it made her stomach hurt.
"Uh, I'm tired. I'm going to sleep now."
Hermione chose the coward's way out: she simply refused to listen!
She was going to sleep right up until midnight, and then sneak out of the castle.
...
Meanwhile, in the Head of Slytherin's office.
Professor Snape received a letter.
The return address read...
St. Lucia's Orphanage.