Tomek, Jan, and Abdullah were hanging out together, just passing time like usual. Eventually, they ended up going to McDonald's. It wasn't anything special—just somewhere to sit, eat, and talk.
While they were there, a girl came up out of nowhere and started talking to Tomek.
Abdullah felt it instantly—that tight, uncomfortable feeling in his chest. He didn't like strangers. Didn't like random interactions like that. It felt forced, unnatural. Without saying much, he got up and left.
Tomek noticed and followed him shortly after.
A bit later, Jan caught up with them.
"Why the hell did you guys leave?" Jan said. "I had to talk to them myself."
Tomek shrugged. "She asked for my Snap and if I wanted to go to the park with them."
Abdullah frowned slightly. "Do you even know who she is?"
Tomek shook his head. "Nah, just some popular girl called Ella."
Something about it didn't sit right with Abdullah. It felt too random. Too forced. Girls like that didn't just come up to guys like them for no reason. It gave him a bad vibe, but he didn't say much.
Later on, Tomek lured Abdullah into walking to the park.
When they got there, the same girl was there, along with two of her friends. Abdullah stood with Jan and Tomek as they started walking through the park together.
But Abdullah couldn't relax. All he could think about was leaving.
Throughout the walk, both Abdullah and Jan stayed quiet, only speaking when spoken to. The girl Ella did most of the talking, while her two friends barely said anything at all.
Most of what she said was directed at Tomek.
"So, do ya play soccer?" she asked.
"Oh yeah, I do," Tomek replied.
"A's or B's?"
"The B's."
"Oh B team ballers," she said, laughing a little to herself.
Something about it annoyed Abdullah instantly.
She's taking the piss… stupid bitch. Who does she think she is? he thought, irritation building under the surface.
Everything about her—the way she spoke, the way she laughed, the way she carried herself—felt fake. Forced. Obnoxious.
As they kept walking, the conversation slowly died. Silence crept in. It wasn't peaceful—it was awkward. Heavy.
Abdullah looked away from the group and stared at the trees.
They looked old. Rotting. Ugly. Covered in bugs, with pale, lifeless leaves.
The trees look so shit, he thought.
Then, out of nowhere—
"Aren't the trees so nice?" Ella said.
Abdullah almost laughed.
He wanted to say no. He wanted to say they looked disgusting.
But he stayed quiet.
Tomek answered instead. "Oh… I guess."
Not long after, they split off and started heading home—back toward Abdullah's.
"Bro, that was so fucking awkward," Tomek said.
"Abdullah, what the hell were you doing, man? You didn't even talk."
"Yeah… I didn't ask to be there," Abdullah replied.
"Then why didn't you leave?"
Abdullah went quiet.
"She was literally taking the piss as well," Tomek added.
Abdullah's mind drifted for a second.
She's the same as her, he thought, thinking about Sara.
"She was so fucking annoying… honestly, just—" Abdullah spoke without thinking, "—put a bullet through her head."
Tomek and Jan both turned to look at him.
"Yo, what the fuck?" Tomek said.
Jan burst out laughing hysterically.
"No, wait—like, not literally," Abdullah said quickly. "Bro, why would I shoot someone? I just said it 'cause she was being annoying."
"So you're gonna shoot someone for being annoying?" Tomek said.
"I'm not shooting anyone," Abdullah replied, slightly irritated now.
After that, they went home.
Another day, Abdullah was just sitting at home, doing nothing, when he came across a show called Dexter. He decided to watch the first episode.
It was about a serial killer.
But not just any killer.
Dexter wasn't normal. He was an outsider. A black sheep. Someone who didn't know how to connect with people. Awkward. Isolated. Different.
A social reject.
A lab geek.
Someone who could never truly be himself.
Abdullah found himself relating more than he expected.
"He's a lot like me… minus the killing part," Abdullah said to himself, letting out a small laugh.
But as he kept watching, his thoughts started to deepen.
Sometimes bad people get away with everything. People face no consequences…
But you can create your own justice.
Maybe I can still make a difference… just like Dexter.
Time passed.
It was Valentine's Day.
Abdullah spent the morning doing nothing—just lying in bed, scrolling, thinking. Letting time pass him by.
Then his phone buzzed.
Tomek.
"Yo Abdullah, guess what? I'm going out with Ella—we're hanging out today. I'll tell ya how it goes, bro."
"Ayy, peak shit man, you're cooking," Abdullah replied.
After that, his mind wandered again.
Kassie.
It was nice while it lasted…
If only I could talk to you once more.
I wonder how you're doing right now.
If i could talk to you once more id tell you.
It wasn't a waste of time…
I wonder what's better… being happy for a little while, just to end up sad…
…or if it would be better if the whole thing never happened at all.
Later that day, Tomek texted again.
"Bro, I'm coming to your house soon, alright? We gotta talk."
"Alright, man."
Not long after, Tomek pulled up.
"Bro, it went so well," Tomek said, grinning. "We ended up… like, shifting in Gala."
Abdullah stuck his arm out and dapped him up—a sign of respect.
"That's great, man. I'm happy for you. So is it official now?"
"I mean… pretty much," Tomek replied.
"Yeah… just be careful. It's not been too long. Don't wanna see you heartbroken, you know?"
"Yeah. Thanks, man. I will be."
Soon after, Tomek left.
Life went on.
Abdullah kept going to BJJ with Erop now and again. Thursday soccer training. School. Homework.
Wake up. Eat. School. Home. Homework. Training. Eat. Shower. Sleep.
Wake up. Repeat.
Day after day.
Whether he was with his family or his friends… Abdullah still felt like an outsider.
One day, sitting alone, Abdullah thought to himself:
I hate talking to new people… I hate socialising… but still, feeling this lonely can't be healthy.
He let out a small, self-deprecating laugh.
Then his thoughts darkened.
Sara… I think I can see why some people end their lives…
Some of them have reasons… when you feel like you truly have no one… when you lose everyone…
He stared ahead, lost in it.
What gives me the right to live?
We all have that right… but some people don't even get the chance. They die from accidents, illnesses… they don't get to live full lives…
God… why do you do this?
So many good people are gone… and all these horrible people are left untouched.
His chest felt heavy.
What's my purpose?
Why am I here?
Why do I live?
Please… give me a sign.
An answer… anything.
God… I beg you. Anything that can help me.
The room stayed silent.
Abdullah never got a response from
God...