Living Room, 2030
"Kids, there are moments in life when you realize things aren't going as planned. Those moments usually happen at the worst possible times—like, for example, when you're at your girlfriend's bachelorette party, surrounded by her family, and her eighty-year-old grandmother pulls a vibrator out of her bag, thinking it's a sewing machine."
Ted Mosby leans back in his armchair with that smile his children know so well: the "this was a mistake, but it turned out incredibly well" smile.
"Lily's bachelorette party was scheduled for the same night as Marshall's bachelor party. While he was in Foxwoods with me, Barney, and the others... well, she was at our apartment with her mother, her grandmother, her aunts, her cousins, and a nun. And also with Robin, who had bought a gift that, let's say, wasn't exactly what the Aldrin family expected. But what no one expected was for Robin to switch the gift tags and turn Grandma Lois into the unwilling protagonist of the night."
"Robin switched the tags?" asked Ted's daughter.
"Robin switched the tags," Ted confirmed. "And what happened next... well, that's what makes this story unforgettable."
Lily, Marshall, and Ted's Apartment – Saturday, 1:00 PM
The apartment was transformed with white balloons, flower garlands, a table full of plates of homemade food, and women—lots of women.
Lily was at the center, radiant, in a white dress that wasn't quite a wedding dress but almost.
Alyx arrived on time, sketchbook under her arm and a package wrapped in brown paper. She climbed the stairs with her heart racing. Lily had invited her, yes, but she hadn't said anything about it being just family. Until now.
The door opened before she could knock. It was Lily.
"Alyx," she said, eyes shining. "You came."
"I said I would."
"I know, but... you don't know how much this means."
Alyx entered, and then she saw the living room full of women she didn't know. An elderly woman in an armchair. A middle-aged woman organizing gifts. A young girl with a wooden cross around her neck. Several aunts, several cousins. But no familiar faces.
Except one.
"Alyx?" said Robin, appearing behind her. "What are you doing here?"
"Lily invited me."
Robin looked at her, surprised. "Really? I thought it was just family."
Alyx felt the ground open beneath her feet. She looked at Lily.
Lily looked down.
"Lily," Alyx said quietly, "is this just your family?"
"Well... yes, but I wanted you to come. You're my family too."
Alyx wanted to say something—ask why she hadn't been told earlier, maybe turn around and leave—but she saw Lily's face, the mix of hope and guilt, and she couldn't.
"Okay," she said. "I'll stay."
"Really?"
"Really. But we'll talk later."
Lily nodded. "We'll talk later."
Lily's mother, Janice, approached. "And who is this?"
Lily took Alyx's hand. "Mom, this is Alyx. She's... my friend, and she's also..."
"An artist," Alyx finished. "I make drawings. Lily asked me to come."
Janice looked at her with a mix of curiosity and reserve. "Oh, how nice. And where did you meet my daughter?"
"At MacLaren's. It's a bar near her apartment."
"A bar," Janice repeated, as if the word tasted like vinegar.
"Yes. It's where we all hang out. Ted, Marshall, Robin, Barney..."
"Barney? The one who gave her a book about how to pick up women at an airport?"
"The same."
Janice frowned. "How interesting."
She walked away without another word. Alyx let out the air she didn't know she was holding.
"You okay?" asked Lily.
"No. But I will be."
Robin approached with a small, wrapped box in her hand. Inside the box, not yet visible, was a mechanical object of suspicious shape.
"Hey, Alyx, did you know this was just family?"
"No. You didn't either, did you?"
"No. Lily told me to come, that it was a party with her friends."
The two looked at Lily. Lily shrugged.
"They're my family, but they're also my friends. And you're my family. What's wrong with wanting all of you here?"
Alyx sighed. "Nothing. But you could have warned us."
"I know. I'm sorry."
Robin held up the black bag. "Well, since we're here... where do I put this?"
Lily took the bag and placed it on the gift table with the others. "There. But don't open anything yet. Family first."
Alyx and Robin exchanged glances. "Of course," they said in unison.
Robin moved closer to Alyx and whispered, "Do you think I should leave?"
"No, stay. If I'm staying, you're staying."
"But my gift... it's a vibrator."
Alyx looked at her. "Really? You bought a vibrator for Lily's bachelorette party?"
"It's a joke. To make us laugh. I didn't know there would be nuns."
"There's a nun. Cousin Margaret is about to take her final vows."
Robin paled. "So what do I do?"
"What I'm doing. Smile, say nice things, and pray no one asks you to open the gift."
"I don't pray."
"Well, start."
The Gift Table – 2:30 PM
The party was in full swing. The aunts talked about their children, the cousins talked about their boyfriends, and Cousin Margaret talked about God with Grandma Lois, who dozed in her armchair.
Robin stood in front of the gift table, sweating. Her small box sat there, next to a pile of elegantly wrapped presents. And next to her box was another, equally wrapped, almost the same size, with a card that said: "For my dear Lily, with all my love. Grandma." Of course, Robin didn't see that inscription in time.
Robin picked up the grandmother's card, then looked at the gift.
"No," she told herself. "I'm not going to do it."
But her hands were already moving. She switched the grandmother's card with her own. Now, one box had the grandmother's card, and the other had Robin's.
"What are you doing?"
Robin spun around, startled. It was Alyx.
"Nothing," said Robin. "I'm doing nothing."
"You just switched the tags."
"Did not."
"Yes, you did. I saw you."
Robin sighed. "Okay, yes, I switched the tags."
"Why?"
"Because my gift is a vibrator, and the other one is probably something more normal to give in front of so many ladies and a nun. But if someone asks me to give my gift first... I don't want to be the one to give a vibrator in front of a nun."
Alyx looked at her, then quickly read the card she had stuck on the gift wrap. "And what are you going to do when Grandma opens your bag and pulls out a vibrator?"
Robin fell silent.
"I hadn't thought of that," Robin admitted, not realizing she had said "grandma."
"Clearly not."
"What do I do?"
----------------------------------------------------------------------
SPECIAL PROMOTION
Subscribe today and take advantage of the "THE DUNPHY" discount, valid until! Don't miss a single chapter of this story. IN MY PATREON
If you enjoyed it, leave a Review and Power Stones.
✅ Early access to 22 new chapters
Join LEGEN - DARY Level on Patreon
👉 https://[email protected]/cw/Day_bluefic
@=a
----------------------------------------------------------------------
What do you think will happen when Grandma opens her gift?
Comment, follow, and support with power stones. 🎁👵