"I really might as well be dead..."
Floating in mid-air, the tiny Doll Sirin repeated herself, her expression utterly devoid of hope. She glared at the group surrounding her, their hands roaming all over her body.
"Even my old human child form would be better than this—!"
Finally unable to endure being fondled from head to toe, the little doll slammed the giant scissors that came with her new body onto the deck with a loud CLANG. The sharp tips pierced straight into the Hermes's deck plating.
"Ah, that would require a custom order—"
"Besides, you should take that issue up with your other half, not me... She's the one who designed your current body—"
"Our shop requires at least a six-month advance booking for custom bodies—"
Snow mercilessly deflected the blame, adding that if Sirin wanted a new body, she'd have to wait at least half a year.
-
"Hey, why did you give me this body?!"
As a former Apostle, Doll Sirin naturally wouldn't dare complain to the divine Snow. So, she turned to her other half and unleashed a soul-piercing interrogation instead.
"And you called me a turban snail! You're the turban snail! Your whole family are turban snails! ...Pfft—!"
"Theoretically, my whole family includes you. We're sisters, after all—"
Still wearing her cat-ear hair accessory, Kiana stared blankly at Doll Sirin, who had suddenly burst out laughing, completely bewildered.
"Ah, Golden Silly Goose, White Blazing Cat, Purple Cat Snail... Doesn't sound too bad, I guess...?"
Snow muttered under her breath, stroking her chin as she fell into deep thought.
"Why does it feel like Schicksal suddenly turned into a zoo...?"
Joyce, who had been listening nearby, felt his lips twitch.
"Calling it a zoo isn't entirely wrong, is it...? In light novel terms, Schicksal's Overseer is still the 'Golden-Haired Loser Dog'."
"Pfft... Ptooey, ptooey, ptooey! I'm getting sidetracked! Why did you turn my body into this?! You utterly goofy white cat!"
"What do you mean, 'utterly goofy white cat'?! Why do you people love giving everyone nicknames?! You purple cat snail!"
"You were the one giving me the cold shoulder before! Do I look like the kind of person who enjoys pressing a warm face against a cold ass?!"
"I thought Bella's doll form looked pretty good, so I just went ahead and arranged the same for you."
Kiana shot back, her tone utterly self-righteous, implying, You acted all high and mighty, so you brought this on yourself.
"What do you mean, 'giving you the cold shoulder'?! You utterly goofy white cat, don't you understand the value of a tsundere?!"
Doll Sirin instantly flew into a rage.
"The value of a tsundere?"
"Tsunderes are completely out of meta now, and you're still talking about their 'value'? Besides, can't you look on the bright side? This is a doll personally crafted by a god! Rounding up, that makes you Adam or Eve!"
"Or to put it more directly, you're a Divine Key! A Divine Key! Something others couldn't get even if they begged for it!"
The Knight Princess mercilessly continued her verbal assault.
"A Divine Key? I think you're just planning to do unspeakable things to me! You've probably already figured out the perfect angle and force to swing me at people!"
"If I wanted to swing someone, why wouldn't I just use Bella? At least Bella's doll has horns! They'd be great for opening cans."
"Oh, right... Bella..."
Doll Sirin's resentment meter temporarily dropped to zero.
"So, in the eyes of the two Queens, I'm nothing more than a can opener..."
A faint, hollow voice, steeped in profound resentment, echoed at that moment—
The Forgotten Dragon, who had been completely ignored by everyone since being dragged into the imaginary space, reverted to her human form in a corner and emerged, radiating a terrifying aura of bitterness...
"...I'm not! I didn't! I love Bella the most! It was that Utterly Goofy White Cat who said it!"
Doll Sirin executed a swift EQ-Denial Combo, shoving the blame onto her other self. At this moment, Miss Sirin had never been so grateful for her ability to split into two personalities. She smugly flew over to Benares's head and perched on top.
"I... You... She... Bella, don't listen to that Purple Cat Snail's excuses! She was clearly tempted just now!!!"
"..."
Bella remained silent, but a thin trickle of red—a testament to her loyalty—flowed from her nose.
"Eek! Bella, what's wrong? Why are you suddenly getting a nosebleed?! Did that old hag injure you somewhere earlier?!"
"I'm going to charge over there right now and fight that old hag for another five hundred rounds—!"
Perched on Bella's head, Doll Sirin panicked when she saw the sudden nosebleed.
Meanwhile, Kiana and Snow, standing nearby, had already figured everything out.
"What color?"
Snow and Kiana asked in perfect unison, seemingly out of nowhere.
"Black with a bit of lace trim... huh...?"
The Dragon Girl subconsciously answered their question, only to be met with their utterly disdainful gazes.
"Hey, White One, what's with that look?! Bella's hurt! It's all because of that old hag in your head! Great God, can you please check where she's injured—?"
"..."
The naive Herrscher Girl still didn't seem to understand what she was sitting on.
"...Injured? Oh, she's not injured at all... In some ways, little one, you're truly adorably naive—"
The blonde God flashed a playful smile.
"...?"
Doll Sirin wore a look of utter confusion.
"Ahem... Other Me, all I can say is... beware the Honkai Lesbians—"
Kiana tried to subtly warn Sirin, who was still perched on Bella's head, unknowingly providing fan service.
"Honkai Lesbian...?"
The purple-haired Doll Girl's confusion only deepened.
"You damn brat... The Dragon Girl under your butt is peeking at your panties! Don't you feel a draft down there???"
A voice, unable to stand it any longer, suddenly cut in. Murata Himeko, who had been sleeping on the sickbed created by Joyce, was finally awake. Leaning against the headboard, she looked at the utterly clueless little doll and bluntly exposed Benares's little scheme.
"....."
"Bella—you perverted dragon! I'm not talking to you anymore!!!"
The enlightened Doll Sirin's face instantly flushed crimson. She punched the stupid Dragon Girl's head beneath her, then huffily scrambled onto the White Blazing Cat's head, glaring at Benares, who was clutching her head and wincing in pain.
"Mmmph—Queen, please let me quibble... no! Explain! It's not what that human said—!"
The latter's expression suddenly shifted, becoming as gentle as still water.
"So, did Bella like it—?"
"...I like it."
"Get lost—!"
"...Yes."