"Comrade!"
Just as Kenichi Amemiya was happily watching Jiraiya get chased down the street, the old perv suddenly spun around, chucked a sealing scroll straight at his chest, and yelled:
"A week's worth of carefully collected material—all yours!"
Then he bolted.
Full speed. No hesitation.
Kenichi stood there with the scroll in his hands, expression slowly freezing.
…Huh?
What just happened?
Why am I suddenly your "comrade"?
Why does this feel like my CPU just crashed?
And then he looked up.
The reason arrived一in the shape of an angry mob.
Several kunoichi had already surrounded him in a rough circle.
They were all glaring.
Knuckles cracking. Veins bulging.
From tired aunties in their forties to sharp-eyed beauties in their early twenties—
the full age spectrum of "furious woman" was now on display.
"…Jiraiya, you absolute menace," Kenichi thought silently. "You really are talented."
"Um…" Kenichi coughed lightly, glanced around at the hostile circle, and tried, very politely,
"if I say I'm just a passerby who got scapegoated, would you believe me?"
Of course they didn't.
"Get him!"
They rushed as one.
Their fists? Very real.
Their killing intent? Even more real.
But what they hit—
Was a log.
With a muffled thump, the "man" in the middle of the circle turned into a chunk of wood.
Kenichi himself was already several rooftops away, calmly landing on a ledge.
He might be many things, but a masochist wasn't one of them.
Just stand there and let a group beat on him?
Not happening.
"Troublesome…" he muttered, lowering his head to look at the scroll in his hand. "What did he even dump on me?"
He was just about to open it when a shadow dropped down in front of him.
"Yo. Long time no see."
Jiraiya.
Perched atop a squat toad, one hand on his hip, looking at him with a seriousness that did not match the chaos from a moment ago.
"Jiraiya-sama?" Kenichi blinked, then put on his best blank face. "Have we met?"
He knew he'd changed his face with the Disguise Technique. There was no reason Jiraiya should recognize him.
Jiraiya only smiled, then held out his hand.
"Scroll."
Rather than hand it over, Kenichi simply unfurled it.
Inside… nothing but a pile of soldier pills.
"You've got the same problem as your teacher," Jiraiya sighed. "Curiosity."
Kenichi's mouth twitched.
Right. Of course that was bait.
Of course there was nothing in it.
And of course Jiraiya had absolutely no shame about it.
Jiraiya hopped off the toad and walked over slowly. At this range, Kenichi knew pretending was pointless.
With a small sigh, he dispelled his transformation, revealing his real face.
"Jiraiya-sama," he asked, genuinely curious, "how did you recognize me?"
"The way of a man is to keep a few secrets," Jiraiya grinned, giving him a thumbs-up. "Makes you more charming."
Kenichi: "…"
Yeah. That tracks.
Still, he kept his guard up.
It wasn't that he was afraid of Jiraiya, exactly—but this man was a legendary Sannin with terrifying combat experience.
And more importantly, back when Kenichi and Orochimaru defected from Konoha, Jiraiya had been one of the reasons they'd had to abandon several bases. The man just refused to give up the chase.
There was no such thing as being "too cautious" around someone like that.
"Relax, kid," Jiraiya said, waving a hand. "You should know I don't mean you any harm."
To prove his point, he fished into his clothes and tossed a small paper bag over.
Kenichi caught it. The smell hit him first—rich, salty, smoky.
Jerky.
"This comes from a widow who runs a stall in a hot springs town in the Land of Fire," Jiraiya explained, tearing open another bag for himself and biting into a piece. "Her jerky's great. I… frequently go support her business."
He really emphasized "business."
Kenichi narrowed his eyes.
"You do mean the jerky business… right?"
"What else would I mean, brat?" Jiraiya rolled his eyes.
Then his expression slid, just slightly, into something… not suitable for minors.
Kenichi looked at him.
Yeah.
Totally trustworthy, this one.
But he accepted the jerky anyway. Meat was meat. And he was pretty sure even Jiraiya wouldn't go so far as to lace the snacks.
Probably.
Jiraiya coughed twice, his gaze suddenly turning evasive, his posture a bit… awkward.
"Actually," he began, "I wanted to ask you something."
Kenichi's heart skipped.
Here it comes.
His mind flashed back to their previous encounter.
To the "new manuscript" Jiraiya had proudly shoved into his hands.
To the title:
"The Things Orochi-Hime and I Can't Talk About"
And the content…
He still remembered far too many of those scenes.
"…What is it?" Kenichi asked, keeping his tone neutral.
"That…" Jiraiya rubbed the back of his neck, looking away. "Do you know… that your teacher is a woman?"
Kenichi inhaled sharply.
Yup. Called it.
"…"
Now, this was a problem.
Say "yes", and if Orochimaru ever found out Jiraiya confirmed it through him, he'd 100% be dragged onto a lab table one day.
Say "no" and… would Jiraiya really buy it?
He hesitated for a long moment, then chose the most survival-oriented option:
"…How about you ask my teacher directly?" he said seriously. "I don't know. Personally, I think probably not."
Safest answer.
He already had nightmares of waking up strapped to an operating table, Orochimaru leaning over him with Yuriko's face, smiling gently:
"Don't be nervous. The surgery is about to begin."
Yeah. No thanks.
"I see…" Jiraiya murmured, falling into his own thoughts, eyes complicated.
No idea what he'd come up with in that head of his—and Kenichi did not plan to stay to find out.
"Then, Jiraiya-sama, I'll be heading off first."
He turned to leave.
"Wait."
Jiraiya raised a hand.
"I'll give you a copy of my new book."
A thin rectangle flew toward him.
Kenichi almost formed a fire-style jutsu on instinct to incinerate it.
Did he look like he didn't know what that was?
The Book.
That book.
The one centered on Orochi-hime.
But burning it here would scream "guilty," so he gritted his teeth and caught it.
He glanced at the cover—
And his resolve wavered.
The artwork was… honestly, very high quality.
The illustrator the publisher had found did not play around.
Just seeing the cover made your fingers itch to turn the page.
"This publisher is terrifying," Kenichi thought. "They really know how to sell sin."
His hand tightened around the book.
Keeping it was risky.
If Orochimaru ever saw it, he wouldn't just be in trouble; he'd be in the obituary section.
But…
It felt like a waste to throw it away on the spot.
"…I'll just hide it very, very well," he told himself silently, slipping it into a sealing scroll.
Be careful, don't get caught.
He'd survived worse.
Note: If you're interested, you can read up to chapter 99+ at patreon.com/nakai01. Don't forget to give a power stone for many bonus chapters.