Tuesday morning, I woke up feeling like I'd been hit by a truck.
Jake was already gone. Early class or gym, I couldn't remember which. The roomon was quiet except for the hum of the mini on fridge and the distant sound of someone's alarm going off down the hall.
I lay in bed staring at the ceiling and tried to convince myself that yesterday hadn't happened.
But theMs,000 under my mattress said otherwise.
My phone buzzed. A text from my mother.
Mom: The landlord confirmed we're good through next month. Thank you, Elias. You saved us. Again.
I stared at the message.
Saved them.
That's what she thought I was doing. Saving them.
She had no idea what I'd actually done to get that money.
I texted back a thumbs up emoji because I didn't trust myself to write actual words, then dragged myself out of bed.
I got through my morning classes on autopilot.
Calculustwenty-four-hours. A seminar on machine learning that I normally would've found interesting but today just felt like noise.
At 2 PM, I sat on the library steps and waited for the Maybach.
My stomach was in knots.
I was going to see Aurelia. After kissing her Friday night. After sleeping with her mother Monday afternoon.
How was I supposed to look at her? How was I supposed to act normal?
The Maybach arrived at 2:45 PM. Marcus nodded at me in the rearview mirror as I climbed in.
"Ms. Aurelia is looking forward to your session today," he said. "She was disappointed you were ill yesterday."
"Yeah. I'm feeling better now."
Liar, I thought. You're the biggest liar alive.
Aurelia was waiting in the library when I arrived.
She stood up the moment I walked in, and before I could say anything, she crossed the room and hugged me.
It was brief. Friendly. But it felt like knives.
"I'm glad you're okay," she said, stepping back. "You scared me. You never miss sessions."
"Just a twenty-four hour thing. Nothing serious."
"Good." She sat back down, and I noticed something different about her. She was smiling. Actually smiling. Not her usual careful, controlled expression. A real smile. "I have something to show you."
"What?"
She turned her laptop toward me. The screen showed her social platform for homeschooled students. But it looked different. M ore polished. More complete.
"I finished the beta version. I tested it with a focus group of twelve students from online homeschool forums. The feedback was incredible. They loved it." Her eyes were bright with excitement. "I'm ready to launch next month. Real launch. Public beta."
"Aurelia, that's amazing."
"I couldn't have done it without you. The coding concepts you taught me, the problem-solving frameworks, all of it came together." She was talking fast, animated in a way I'd never seen before. "I'm thinking of calling it Haven. Because that's what it is. A safe haven for people like me who don't fit into traditional social structures."
"Haven. I love it."
"Do you really think it could work? As a real platform?"
"I think it could change lives."
She beamed at me, and my chest tightened with guilt.
This girl. This brilliant, isolated, hopeful girl who was finally coming out of her shell. Who trusted me. Who'd kissed me and told me I made, her feel like she could ,breathe.
And I'd betrayed her in the worst possible way.
"Let's work on the launch strategy," I said, my voice rough. "Marketing, user acquisition, all of it."
We spent the next two hours planning. Aurelia was in her element. Taking notes. Asking questions. Building spreadsheets and timelines with the same precision she brought to coding.
I tried to focus. Tried to be present. Tried to be the tutor and friend she deserved.
But my mind kept wandering back to Monday. To Selene's penthouse. To the arrangement.
To the fact that I was living a lie.
At 5:30 PM, Aurelia closed her laptop.
"I need to ask you something," she said.
My stomach dropped. "Okay."
"Friday night. In the garden. That kiss." She looked down at her hands. "I've been thinking about it constantly. I can't concentrate. I can't sleep. I just keep replaying it over and over."
"Aurelia..."
"Please let me finish." She took a breath. "I know this is co mplicated. I know you're my tutor and there are boundaries and my mother would probably destroy both of us if she knew. But I need to know. Did that kiss mean anything to you? Or was it just a moment? Because if it was just a moment, I can deal with that. I can compartmentalize and move on. But if it meant something..." She looked up at me. "I need to know."
I should've told her the truth. That it meant something. That she meant something.
But I thought about Selene. About the arrangement. About the $1,000 a week that was keeping my family afloat.
About the fact that I'd already made my choice.
"It meant something," I said quietly. "But it can't happen again."
Her face fell. "Why not?"
"Because I'm your tutor. Because your mother trusted me. Because if we cross that line, everything gets complicated in ways neither of us can control."
"Everything's already complicated."
"I know. But we can still choose not to make it worse." I forced myse,lf to meet her eyes. "You',re brilliant, Aurelia. You're going to do incredible things with Haven. You're going to meet people at university who challenge you and inspire you. And you deserve to experience all of that without being tangled up with your tutor who's seven years older than you and comes with more baggage than you can imagine."
"I don't care about baggage."
"You should. Because I'm drowning in it. And the las and to met thing I want is to pull you under with me." I stood up. "We can be friends. I can be here for you. But anything more than that... we have to let it go."
She was quiet for a long moment. Then she said, "This is about my mother, isn't it?"
My blood went cold. "What?"
"She talked to you. After Friday. She warned you off, didn't she?"
"Aurelia..."
"You don't have to lie to protect me. I know how she operates. She sees threats everywhere. And someone making me happy? That's the biggest threat of all." She laughed bitterly. "God, I'm so stupid. Of course she intervened. Of course she found a way to ruin this before it even started."
"She's just trying to protect you."
"She's trying to control me. There's a difference." Aurelia grabbed her laptop and stood. "I need to be alone for a while."
"Can we still have sessions?"
"I don't know. I need to think." She walked toward the door, then stopped and turned back. "For what it's worth, Elias, I think you're lying. To me and to yourself. But if this is what you want, if you're choosing her approval over being honest about what you feel, then fine. I can't stop you."
She left.
And I sat alone in the library, hating myself.
That night, back in my dorm, my phone buzzed.
A text from Selene.
Selene: How did the session go?
I stared at the message. Thought about lying. Thought about telling her that her daughter was hurt and confused and it was all my fault.
Instead, I typed the truth.
Me: She knows you warned me off. She's upset.
Selene: She'll get over it. She always does.
Me: Will she?
Selene: She's resilient. She inherited that from me.
I wanted to throw my phone across the room.
Instead, I typed back.
Me: She deserves better than this.
Selene: She deserves to build the life I've created for her without distractions. You're helping her do that. Remember that.
Me: Is that what you tell yourself?
There was a long pause. Then my phone rang.
I answered. "Hello?"
"Don't question my parenting, Elias." Selene's voice was cold. Sharp. "You don't know what I've sacrificed to give her everything she has."
"I know you've sacrificed her happiness."
"Happiness is temporary. Security is forever." She took a breath, and when she spoke again, her voice was softer. "I need to see you. Tonight."
"Selene, I can't. I have homework. I have..."
"I'm not asking." Another pause. "Please. I need..." She trailed off.
It was the please that got me. The crack in her armor.
"Where?" I asked.
"My penthouse. I'll send a car in an hour."
She hung up before I could respond.
The car arrived at 9 PM.
Different driver this time. Younger. Didn't say a word the entire trip.
When I arrived at the penthouse, Selene answered the door in jeans and a loose sweater. No makeup. Hair down. She looked younger. Vulnerable.
"Come in," she said quietly.
I followed her inside. The lights were dimmed. There was a bottle of wine on the coffee table, half empty.
"Have you been drinking?" I asked.
"A glass or two. Don't worry, I'm not drunk. Just... tired." She sat on the couch and gestured for me to join her. "Sit. Please."
I sat on the opposite end of the couch.
"You can sit closer. I'm not going to bite." She poured another glass of wine. "Unless you want me to."
"Selene..."
"I'm joking. Relax." She took a sip. "I had a meeting with the board today. They're pushing for expansion into Asia. Aggressive timelines. Unrealistic expectations. And all I could think about was how much I hate every single person in that room."
"Then why do you do it?"
"Because it's all I have. The company. The empire. The control." She looked at me. "And now I have you. Someone who sees me as more than a CEO or a mother or a weapon."
"Is that what I am to you? A escape?"
"Yes. And no." She set her wine glass down and moved closer. "You're the first person in years who doesn't want something from me beyond what I'm willing to give. You're not trying to manipulate me or use me or take from me. You're just... here."
"I'm here because you're paying me."
"Is that the only reason?" Her hand found mine. "Because if it is, if this is purely transactional for you, then tell me now. I can handle that. What I can't handle is ambiguity."
I looked down at our joined hands. "I don't know what this is."
"Neither do I. But it's something." She leaned her head on my shoulder. "Stay with me tonight. Not for sex. Just... stay. I don't want to be alone."
I should've said no. Should've left. Should've maintained at least some boundary.
But I didn't.
Because I understood loneliness. And because despite everything, I didn't want her to be alone either.
"Okay," I said. "I'll stay."
We fell asleep on the couch, her head on my chest, my arm around her shoulders.
It was intimate in a way that felt more dangerous than sex.
Because this wasn't the arrangement. This wasn't transactional.
This was real.
And that terrified me more than anything.
I woke up at 3 AM to my phone buzzing.
A text from Aurelia.
Aurelia: I'm sorry about today. I was upset and I took it out on you. Can we talk tomorrow? Please?
I looked down at Selene, still asleep against me, her breathing soft and steady.
Then I looked at the message from her daughter.
And I realized I was trapped in a nightmare of my own making.
I typed back.
Me: Of course. Same time. I'll be there.
I set my phone down and closed my eyes, but sleep didn't come back.
Because I knew, deep in my bones, that this couldn't last.
Something was going to break.
And when it did, it was going to destroy all three of us.