Kia didn't break down.
Not yet.
He sat on the edge of his bed, elbows on his knees, staring at nothing as the ache settled deeper than tears ever could.
It hurt—but it wasn't unfamiliar.
Slowly, memories crept in. Ones he hadn't allowed himself to touch in years.
Five years ago.
The day his parents sat him down, voices calm, smiles practiced, and told him what was expected of him.
Family duty. Stability. Reputation.
Ryan's brother.
A "better choice."
And the stupidest thing was—he'd agreed.
He'd convinced himself it was practical. Temporary. That Ryan would understand if he explained it right.
He hadn't.
Kia still remembered graduation day like it was carved into his bones.
The crowd. The noise. The way Ryan's smile froze when Kia told him it was over.
Not anger.
Not shouting.
Just that look.
Like something inside him had gone quiet and empty all at once.
Kia pressed a hand to his chest now, breath catching.
So this is what it felt like.
This tight, crushing grip. This helplessness. This disbelief that someone you trusted could look at you and walk away.
And suddenly, this morning didn't feel like cruelty.
It felt like symmetry.
"…I deserved that," Kia whispered.
Because what he'd done back then—what he'd taken from Ryan—had been far worse than being told to leave a warm bed.
At least Ryan hadn't lied to him today.
Kia leaned back, staring at the ceiling.
Another memory surfaced about what happened earlier today with hm and his bunny conversation—one he hadn't expected.
His bunny.
Back then.
When is bunny asked him to leave and when he asked if his bunny was using him.
Kia remembered asking, voice shaking,
"Are you using me?"
And Ryan—
Ryan hadn't answered.
The same silence.
The same hollow space.
Kia's throat tightened as the realization fully sank in.
How did he survive that?
Because right now, Kia felt like his heart was being crushed in someone's fist, slowly, mercilessly.
And yet Ryan had carried that pain for five years.
Alone.
Kia closed his eyes.
The hurt didn't disappear—but it softened into something else.
Understanding.
Regret.
And restraint.
"…I won't make the same mistake again, I will fight for us, I will give u space for now," he murmured.
A little punishment on his side.
Just room to breathe.
So he would give it.
For now.
—
Ryan didn't return to his office.
He went straight to Liam.
The office lights were dim, screens glowing softly as Liam looked up when Ryan entered.
"You're ready," Liam said, not a question.
Ryan nodded once. "Yes."
No hesitation.
No warmth.
Back to business.
They spread the documents out—names, movements, timelines. The next phase. The one they'd delayed longer than they should have.
"This will get ugly," Liam warned quietly.
"I know."
Liam studied Ryan's face. He saw it then—the tightness around his eyes, the way his jaw stayed clenched like he was holding something down.
Guilt.
Liam felt it too.
Deep, buried, unwelcome.
What they were about to do would destroy lives. It already had. And someone innocent had been caught in the crossfire long ago.
But Liam pushed the feeling aside.
"What must be done must be done," he said, voice steady.
Ryan's gaze didn't waver.
"I won't hesitate again."
The words were calm.
Final.
And somewhere between duty and regret, both men stepped fully back into the roles they had sworn they would never leave.
Author pov: thank you all for reading my book up to this point, plz comment your thoughts about what you think about this novel, it actually goes a long way and that also assure and encourage me.