The morning mist clung to the courtyard as Lin Xuanji trudged out of his room, hair messy, robes wrinkled, and soul barely intact.
Kai Yun, on the other hand, was already in the courtyard swinging her giant sword like it weighed nothing.
SWHH—
BOOM—
SWHHH—
BOOM—
Every swing shook the air.
Ruolan hid behind a pillar.
Feng Xiao had her hands pressed to her ears.
Tian Wen watched silently, aura steadier than yesterday but eyebrows twitching.
Wei Tian pretended not to be alarmed.
Ling Xueyin sipped tea with her usual serenity.
Lin Xuanji squinted.
"Why are you training at dawn?"
Kai Yun grinned. "Because this mountain makes my body feel WRRRRRRRM."
She shook her arms. "Like it's saying 'SWING HARDER.'"
Lin Xuanji glared up at the sky.
"I blame you."
(Host is correct.)
OF COURSE YOU AGREE NOW.
Kai Yun twirled her sword and pointed at the mountain peak.
"Alright! Time to try something stronger!"
Lin Xuanji's soul left his body for a moment.
"NO. No stronger. Absolutely not."
Kai Yun blinked innocently. "Why not?"
"Because this is a mountain, not a punching bag."
"It hums at me when I swing."
"It hums at ME when I SLEEP. That doesn't mean anything."
Ruolan peeked out. "Sect Master… I think the mountain really DOES like her."
"Stop saying upsetting things."
Feng Xiao nodded. "It hummed four times this morning."
"STOP."
Kai Yun laughed and planted her sword in the ground.
"Fine. If you won't let me blow up the courtyard—"
"Why is that your phrasing—"
"I'll spar instead."
Lin Xuanji choked.
"With WHO?!"
Kai Yun pointed directly at Wei Tian.
Ruolan fainted.
Feng Xiao gasped.
Tian Wen's eyes widened.
Wei Tian paused sharpening his spear.
"…Me?"
Kai Yun grinned brightly. "Yes! You! You're the strongest-looking one here!"
Wei Tian considered this.
Then turned to Lin Xuanji.
"Sect Master. Permission to educate the new disciple?"
Lin Xuanji waved his hands violently. "NO. Absolutely not."
Kai Yun pouted. "Why?!"
"BECAUSE HE WILL OBLITERATE YOU."
"Oh."
Wei Tian nodded politely. "I would."
Kai Yun blinked. "Really?"
"Yes."
"Oh."
She blinked again.
"…Can we fight anyway?"
"NO."
"Just lightly?"
"NO."
"Softly?"
"Still NO."
"Gently?"
"NO!!"
Kai Yun crossed her arms.
"You're too careful."
"You're too reckless!"
Ruolan regained consciousness just long enough to say, "P-Please don't fight… please…"
Feng Xiao sighed. "Let's train without violence, okay?"
Kai Yun gave her a look. "Your definition of violence is too strict."
Before Feng Xiao could argue, Tian Wen stepped forward.
"If you need to swing your sword," he said quietly, "I'll practice nearby so the qi doesn't destabilize you."
Kai Yun stared at him.
"…You'll train next to me?"
Tian Wen nodded. "Yes."
Kai Yun's eyes sparkled.
"You're my new favorite."
Tian Wen blinked. "I didn't ask for that."
"You can't reject it."
Lin Xuanji sighed deeply.
"Alright. Fine. Everyone train. But NO duels, no explosions, no shaking the mountain, no—"
The mountain hummed.
Lin Xuanji glared at the ground.
"I wasn't finished."
(Host. Fifth disciple profile available.)
Lin Xuanji's eye twitched. I don't want to hear it.
(Fifth disciple trait: extremely quiet.)
Oh thank goodness.
(But incredibly unlucky.)
"I TAKE IT BACK. CANCEL THE FIFTH DISCIPLE."
(Request denied. Estimated arrival: three days.)
Lin Xuanji pressed his palms to his face.
"I need to write a complaint letter."
Feng Xiao: "To who?"
Ruolan: "The mountain?"
Wei Tian: "He would be writing to himself."
Ling Xueyin: "He would."
Lin Xuanji screamed internally.
But training began.
Ruolan practiced basic movements.
Feng Xiao lit controlled bursts of flame.
Tian Wen held a low stance, steadying his qi.
Kai Yun swung her sword in arcs that made the air whistle.
Wei Tian stood watch, adjusting posture and stance with a soldier's precision.
Ling Xueyin supervised all of them with quiet grace.
Lin Xuanji watched his disciples—
not perfect, not coordinated, not normal—
but earnest.
Growing.
Day by day.
The mountain hummed gently.
Almost… proudly.
Lin Xuanji exhaled.
"…This might actually work."
(Host.)
"What."
(Fifth disciple's misfortune aura has activated.)
"WHAT DOES THAT MEAN—"
Thunder cracked in the distance.
Tian Wen stiffened.
Feng Xiao's flame sputtered.
Kai Yun stopped mid-swing.
Ruolan clutched his broom.
Wei Tian gripped his spear.
Ling Xueyin looked toward the horizon calmly.
A dark cloud formed far away, twisting unnaturally.
Lin Xuanji whispered:
"…Please tell me that's normal."
The System replied:
(Host. It is not normal.)
Lin Xuanji fell to his knees.
"…I hate this job."
The mountain hummed—
as if laughing.