That time, when Miles Crawford wanted to call the police, Ariana Thorne stopped him. She still went to see her mother. Although her mother was indifferent to her, she had her brother and her younger brother. Later, she never touched the piano again.
Afterward, Miles married her because of his mother, but after marriage, he resented her for being unclean. She had shadows about marital intimacy and couldn't make Miles happy. Soon, Miles and she lay on the same bed dreaming different dreams, and rumors of her infertility began.
Miles never clarified for her. She was inherently weak, and it was her first time facing such things, feeling helpless.
She loved Miles in her heart and endured the gossip to be his wife, praying that her brother would greatly help him in his work and never stingy with money, giving all to her mother-in-law to manage.
She just wanted a place to stay. She already felt dirty and had nowhere to go.
But in the end, Miles cheated on her with a younger girl and deceived her into being a surrogate, naively thinking he could swindle her brother's premarital property given to her.
"Shea Thorne, everyone in this world is bad. Miles was so good back then, but in the end, didn't he leave with someone else? Milo Sinclair is also a bad man. He just sees you're young and easy to deceive; he just wants to trick you into bed. In the end, he'll still abandon you!"
Shea Thorne looked at her reflection on the lake's surface, and in that moment, Ariana Thorne returned to her body, helplessly crying to the water, "You have to believe me, I'm protecting you, there are no good people in this world, none!"
"They're all liars! Liars! The second time around, I clearly avoided disaster after my rebirth, I came back so clean, wasn't I good to Miles? Why did he still end up leaving with someone else?"
"But even if he's no good, only he didn't reject me once..."
Shea finally understood Ariana Thorne's behavior of flattering in her second life. She attributed her misfortune in her first life to that accidental harm, also indirectly proving Miles was the best man in this world. So, naively, she thought that as long as she didn't have an accident in the second life, Miles would have a perfect marriage and life with her.
However, it didn't happen.
Ariana Thorne couldn't shake off the shadow. In her first life, having been truly violated, she took a break from school to recuperate between the ages of eighteen and twenty. In the second and third lives, her heart still couldn't get past those two years, so she took a two-year break from schooling.
"Ariana Thorne, don't force yourself anymore, please? You no longer like him, don't be trapped in the harm from that night, otherwise, a new life will never appear," Shea tried to counsel. As a fellow woman, she could understand such harm. She also suffered relationships that shattered her heart, but one can't remain passive; otherwise, this vicious cycle would never resolve.
Ariana's memories were quite abstract; she subconsciously protected Shea, so the harm wasn't compounded by the torturous process of "memories," beyond knowing the truth.
Such a gentle girl, she could have allowed her to also feel the despair at that time, being pinned down and violated, nearly suffocated to death, when the strings of a piano in front of her eyes were snapped, losing resonance forever.
"You wouldn't understand, you don't understand," Ariana Thorne, with her exquisitely beautiful appearance, was pitiful when she cried, yet she refused to communicate: "The appearance of a new man means potential unknown harm, for so long I couldn't avoid it, changing to someone else brings the same result. Miles was right before, indeed I'm nothing."
How long is so long?
The first and second lives ended on the same day, doubling thirty-two would only be sixty-four, plus the twenty years now lived, eighty-four years span across three lives, while some people live eighty-four years in just one.
To others, one lifetime has been her three.
And Miles Crawford, whom she saw as a savior, after failing at intimacy one day, hurled abuse at her, calling her insane and accusing her of wasting his life.
That's when she chose the path of suicide, attempting to clear the way for Miles.
...
Such a foolishly gentle girl, refusing to look forward to protect herself, Shea, watching, was both angry and resentful, yet couldn't bear to voice a single criticism.
"Ariana, don't think like that. You're beautiful. You just need to change your style slightly and people will like you as you walk on the street. You're not nothing," Shea stood up for her. All the humiliation she faced a few days ago evaporated, as Ariana's life was always lived in that night Miles saved her, unable to face the future.
In her eyes, without Miles there was no way to survive. If he hadn't come that night, she would have surely died in that filthy corner, found naked and covered in wounds.
A noble person's dignity, even in death, can't be sullied.
But Miles came; he hugged her and walked her through the harm, took her to find her mother. That's why, across three lives, she always desired to be with Miles, even if he ultimately rejected her, she followed him.
But today, Miles asked her to leave. She hurt so much, yet he still asked her to leave.
Perhaps in this life, she wouldn't even have the chance to be with him; he liked his senior, he abandoned her in dire situations.
Shea thought Ariana was too pessimistic, immediately turning on the camera function of her phone, saying to the beautiful face inside: "Look at yourself now, just one smile and you can attract such excellent men."
The camera had a beautify function, and her tear-stained face looked pitiful and endearing on the phone.
Shea emphasized, "Milo Sinclair, the man so many only dare to dream of at night, just this morning he made Zoe Wymond cry, yet he's willing to fetch slippers for you."
"He likes you, he's been interacting with you, so all these are what he gives to you, not me." Ariana couldn't deceive herself. On the most beautiful day of her eighty-four years, with exquisite jewelry, a concert, and an outstanding man confessing to her, it was all for Shea, not her.
Shea shook her head, "No! I am you, and you are me. Look at how excellent I was in past life, didn't I end up without a confidant? It takes your beautiful exterior in this life to attract Milo. No one else combined is worth a Milo."
Shea was an orphan, ordinary in looks, not reclusive, very adept at leveraging her advantages, but ultimately, thriving without any willing to wholeheartedly comfort her.
When love first bloomed, the man she loved married someone else for money; she was eventually made a mistress, then beaten by his wife at the National Conservatory of Music's entrance, while he watched from the car.
When she became successful and famous, she trusted no man's sweet talk, but knew this wasn't her fault. A girl who's been hurt must live more dashingly than everyone without a sincerely loving partner.
"Ariana, you are me, and I am you," Shea decided to help her out of the gloom, encouraging her, "Without you, Milo wouldn't have noticed me this quickly. We enjoy today partly because of you."
Ariana looked at her beautiful reflection on the water surface, realizing this face came from herself, it attracted Milo, but it was Shea's interaction with him that made him fall for her.
Quirky and cute Shea.
But nonetheless, they were inseparable.
She tried to soothe Ariana's mood, but Ariana now was preoccupied thinking of Milo; he said: "He can surely discover her merit, they could travel to every beautiful place in the world searching for the sounds she loves."
He confessed to Ariana but wanted to search for the sounds Shea loved with Shea.
What difference is there compared to the past two lives with Miles?!
No! She can't go on like this! She finally returned to her best self ever; she can't face tomorrow's disappointment again!
The princess's lovely face on the water began to contort, watching herself go from hell to heaven today, driven away and then lifted up, all because of the other person inside her body, as her last bit of perseverance crumbled.
Milo said many things, depicting a brilliant, ethereal future, but missed saying one thing, words Ariana cared about, something Shea avoided with all her might.
He didn't say he liked or loved.
Missing these words became the convincing evidence Ariana used to argue against, showing Milo was just toying with her.
The phone rang, the screen lit up with Sharon Somerset's call from the dorm, but Ariana only looked at the time on the screen.
It was 11:33 pm, almost three hours since she refused Milo.
In these three hours, there was no message at all.
He let her go too, she just refused him, and he didn't even try a bit harder to fight for her. Before, he would at least send a message saying he'd arrived home.
As expected, men are all liars.
Ariana stood up, gazing at the cool lake surface, neatly placing her slipped-off footwear, donned in the loveliest princess dress of her three lifetimes, she leapt into the icy water barefoot.
Through three lives but never as good as a month of Shea's life.
She yielded and gave up.