Night fell over Dustwind Valley.
Everyone expected peace.
They were wrong.
Because somewhere above the clouds…
a squad of armored figures descended with heavenly trumpets blaring off-key.
Tien screamed:
"What's that noise?! Is Heaven… HONKING at us?!"
Aurelius narrowed his eyes.
"No. Those are battle horns."
Solene frowned.
"No… they're just really bad at music."
Auntie Bao prepared her mop.
Miyu floated forward, hugging her pillow.
"…Visitors."
---
⭐ 1. THE HEAVENLY STRIKE TEAM REVEALS ITSELF
Light exploded from above the valley.
Seven figures descended dramatically — too dramatically.
Their poses were overly choreographed.
Their armor sparkled aggressively.
Their auras smelled like burning hand sanitizer.
One shouted:
"BEHOLD! WE ARE—
THE SEVEN STERILITY SAINTS!"
Lin Ruyin whispered:
"They look… so punchable…"
Tien whispered:
"They look like a boyband…"
Jin Haru whispered:
"They look like they've never cleaned anything in their lives…"
The leader stepped forward.
He had immaculate hair and carried a giant clipboard.
"I AM SAINT CLINICAL.
We are here to ENFORCE the Heavenly Decree of Sterilization!"
Miyu blinked.
"…You smell chemical."
Saint Clinical gasped so loud it echoed across eight provinces.
---
⭐ 2. THE SAINTS DECLARE WAR
Saint Clinical raised his clipboard dramatically.
"MIYU OF DUSTWIND!
You stand accused of:
• Excessive Purity
• Unauthorized Emotional Cleaning
• Illegal Cubic Artifacts
• Reckless Town Improvement
• And worst of all…
REFUSING TO STERILIZE YOUR DISCIPLES!"
Auntie Bao protested:
"I bathe them every week!"
Tien shouted:
"NO YOU DON'T—YOU JUST HOSE US DOWN!"
"THAT COUNTS!" she yelled.
The Saints pointed their weapons.
Saint Clinical bellowed:
"MEN—ACTIVATE FORMATION:
**TRIANGLES OF STERILITY**!"
They arranged themselves into complicated shapes.
Tien squinted.
"Are they… doing geometry as an attack?"
Aurelius nodded seriously.
"Yes. Heavenly math."
---
⭐ 3. DUSTWIND RESPONDS
Aurelius stepped forward.
He lifted his cube-blade and sliced the air, producing a clean wave.
"I, Aurelius, disciple of Miyu, will face you."
Saint Sterilance charged.
"I SHALL ERASE YOUR IMPURITY—!!"
Aurelius parried with a perfect, posture-approved strike.
Their weapons clashed.
A shockwave erupted.
Tien was blown into a tree.
Lin Ruyin clung to a rock.
Auntie Bao held her mop like a granny facing teenagers at her door.
"ENOUGH! STOP SCARING THE CHILDREN!"
She slapped Saint Sterilance with her mop.
He flew fifty meters.
---
⭐ 4. CHAOS EVERYWHERE
Lin Ruyin activated her posture staff.
It smacked a Saint for slouching.
He turned into a blinding star of shame.
Jin Haru's cube transformed into a vacuum.
The vacuum inhaled a heavenly saint.
Tien yelled:
"SPIT HIM OUT!! SPIT HIM OUT!!"
The vacuum burped and released him —
but also took his confidence, posture, and half his hair.
Auntie Bao swung her mop, and three Saints were wiped into a neat little stack.
Solene drew glowing runes in the air.
A Saint shouted:
"THOSE ARE ILLEGAL SIGILS!"
Solene smiled angelically.
"I made them up."
The Saint screamed and fainted.
---
⭐ 5. THE LEADER CHALLENGES MIYU
Saint Clinical pointed his clipboard.
"ENOUGH!!
You are chaotic!
You are dangerous!
You are UNAUTHORIZED PURITY!"
Miyu looked at him.
"…You are loud."
He screeched.
"I WILL PERSONALLY STERILIZE YOU!"
He raised his divine clipboard.
Rules began glowing around him.
Heavenly law twisted into a spear of anti-cleanliness.
He thrust it forward.
Tien screamed.
Auntie Bao gasped.
Aurelius jumped forward too late.
The spear struck.
A puff of light.
A pause.
Miyu stood there.
Completely fine.
Holding the clipboard.
Saint Clinical blinked.
"…What…?"
Miyu calmly, gently…
**cleaned the clipboard.**
She wiped away a smudge.
She straightened the pages.
She aligned the corners.
Then handed it back.
"…Messy," she said.
Saint Clinical staggered backward like someone punched his soul.
"My… my rules…
She… SHE FIXED THEM?!"
His aura shattered.
His formation collapsed.
He fell to his knees.
"I AM NOT WORTHY OF MY OWN CLIPBOARD—!!"
---
⭐ 6. THE SAINTS RETREAT
Seeing their leader spiritually broken by a child holding a pillow,
the remaining Saints panicked.
"RETREAT!"
"THEIR CLEANLINESS IS DIFFERENT!!"
"OUR STERILITY IS TOO WEAK!!"
"SHE ORGANIZED HIS HEART!!"
They grabbed Saint Clinical and fled upward into the sky.
Tien waved a frying pan.
"AND DON'T COME BACK!!"
Aurelius sheathed his cube-blade.
Solene sighed.
Auntie Bao dusted off her apron.
Lin Ruyin collapsed in relief.
Miyu floated quietly, eyes unreadable.
"…Heaven will send more," she said softly.
The disciples shivered.
"Tomorrow…"
Her voice echoed like a whisper of doom.
"…bigger attack."