Chapter 30: Reasonable and Logical Misunderstanding
Because of Kure Raian and Kaolan's slow eating habits—savoring every bite while occasionally glaring at each other—the dinner dragged on. But everyone didn't feel bored; gathering together to chat and talk made it quite interesting, like a bizarre family reunion.
Lucifer even ran upstairs to Cerberus's room in the middle of it and got her a new smartphone. When she brought it down, she surprisingly discovered that Kobayashi Rindou and the others had the exact same model—Ren's standard-issue interdimensional tech.
After Cerberus joined the group chat "Ren's Protection Squad", chaos ensued.
Her first message was simply: "I am also my Master's family! Guard Dog reporting for duty! Woof!"
This statement made everyone who was lurking in the group explode. The chat scrolled so fast it was a blur.
Electronic Empress (Ritsu): "Master?! Family?! Another one?!"
Love Master (Utaha): "Is this a new character arc? The loyal pet trope?"
Call Me President (Kirari): "Interesting dynamic. Ren collects strays."
The scene briefly lost control. Kobayashi Rindou, reading the chat on her phone, was also stunned for a moment. Her eyes narrowed.
Then she ran directly to Ren's ear, leaning over the counter, and whispered with a teasing, dangerous lilt, "So you like that kind too, Master~? Pet play? Should I buy a collar?"
Ren was startled. He looked up from his book. He saw Lucifer's helpless expression as she tried to explain technology to the dog-girl, and Cerberus's ears wiggling happily as she typed furiously with one finger.
He instantly knew what was going on.
It must have been Cerberus calling me Master in the group… again.
Ren didn't say anything to correct them.
Up until now, the chat members all thought that the different times for many people in the group were due to time differences in different countries (Thailand, America, Japan). But in reality, it was due to different worlds and timelines.
Everyone in the group saw the profile photo Lucifer uploaded of herself and Cerberus. They expressed how beautiful and cute they were.
Suzuki Zaibatsu Young Mistress (Sonoko): "OMG! Those accessories are so realistic! I want a Cerberus ear headpiece! And that crown!"
Electronic Empress (Ritsu): "The craftsmanship on the horns is top-tier. Where did you buy them? Akihabara?"
That's right. They still thought these two were humans cosplaying, and that the ears and horns on their heads were high-quality accessories. But in reality, they were biological parts of a Demon Queen and a Hellhound.
With all these terms being reasonably and logically misunderstood, everyone actually chatted even more smoothly?!
Ren was quite surprised at the time. He really couldn't imagine how a gambling-addicted President (Kirari) and a high-tech Scientist (Tabane/Ritsu) could get together to talk about how to make money with a literal Demon.
Ren almost doubted how they connected two unrelated things at the time. But the internet is a strange place.
Ren didn't expose any of this. After all, people from other worlds always thought they were the normal ones, and people from this world always felt they were chatting with eccentric foreigners. It was a perfect, fragile balance.
It wasn't until very late that Kure Raian and Kaolan finally finished eating. The plates were licked clean.
Both needed to conserve energy for the upcoming tournament, so they didn't linger much.
"See you then," Kaolan said, nodding to Ren.
"Don't die before I kill you!" Raian shouted.
And they left into the night.
Karura and Kure Fusui also seemed reluctant to leave. Karura clung to the doorframe.
"Ren! I don't want to go!"
"Go home, Karura. Your grandfather is worrying."
Finally, thinking of their old man's wrath and that they had assassination contracts to fulfill the next day, they reluctantly bid farewell to Kobayashi Rindou and Lucifer.
In a short period, whether it was Cerberus's energetic cuteness or Lucifer's Queen-like tone mixed with a young girl's curiosity about "emojis," everyone had a very good impression of these two new group members.
After seeing the Kure clan and Kaolan leave, the shop felt empty.
Kobayashi Rindou put away her smile. She crossed her arms and sat on the chair opposite the counter, looking at Ren, who was back to reading his fishing magazine.
She softly said, her voice serious, "Ren. Kirari said she's coming to find you personally in three days. It seems you must go this time. She doesn't travel for small matters."
Lucifer and Cerberus also looked up. They knew who Momobami Kirari was from the chat; although they weren't close, they were at least digital friends.
As for Erina, Hisako, and Momo, they sat silently on the side, listening to the conversation about people they didn't know.
Ren, while reading, turned a page and softly said, "That idiot Kirari seems to have messed up big time. But you're right, her coming personally proves that she can't solve this herself with money or gambling~ She needs muscle."
Kobayashi Rindou sighed and said, "Only you and those few robot brains dare to call Kirari an 'idiot'. Everyone else calls her a monster. I really don't know why you people are so smart yet so troublesome."
Ren smirked and casually said, "It's a simple matter, just a difference in reaction speed. Aren't you leaving yet? Do the Elite Ten not have classes tomorrow? It's a school night."
Before Kobayashi Rindou could speak, Erina proudly interjected, flipping her hair.
"Of course not. Unnecessary classes are naturally unnecessary to attend for the elite. Second-year Elite Ten need to research recipes, third-year Elite Ten need to travel all over the world for inspiration. And as for me, the Tenth Seat, I have various tastings and practices every day. Classes are just for show for the Elite Ten. We are above the curriculum."
Ren nodded and said nothing.
The Elite Ten's standard should be considered quite high for high schoolers, but for him, it was just average. He had seen chefs who cooked with magic fire and sliced dragons.
However, being able to become an Elite Ten member also proved one thing: their talent was sufficient to be molded.
Ren didn't show any surprised expression at her bragging, which was within Erina's expectations. She was absolutely certain by now that Ren's cooking skills could easily defeat Eishi Tsukasa with one hand tied behind his back, so she had no reason to feel proud in front of him.
Thinking of this, Erina whispered, twisting her hands together, "Shopkeeper Ren... regarding the Stagiaire program... I can do practical training here, right?"
"You can~"
"I can… Eh?" Erina blinked. "Just like that… You agreed? No test?"
Ren chuckled, closing his magazine. "Of course. The old man told me about the practical training requirements, and I knew that his proud granddaughter would eventually be brought here by him or fate. Your coming here now is also a matter your grandfather decided at that time~ He planned this."
Erina was startled and asked suspiciously, "Eh? Wasn't the notice just issued these two days? Grandfather knew?"
Ren stood up, stretching. He looked at the message history on his phone and sighed.
"That's right. But the old man told me about this a year ago. He asked me to reserve a spot for you. So, Miss Nakiri, you are technically a year late for your first shift."
Erina nodded blankly. Grandfather planned this a year ago? While I was still in junior high?
"I'll be back in a couple of days when Kirari comes. Erina, let's go. We have to report this." Rindou stood up.
Erina nodded and was about to ask how much the practical training fee would cost when she saw Ren smile.
"No need for payment. Since you'll all be coming to work part-time soon as interns, I'll just deduct the meal cost from your future wages~"
"Huh?!" Erina gasped. "We get paid for practical training?! And we have wages?!"
Usually, students paid to stage at top restaurants, or worked for free.
Erina's words made Kobayashi Rindou sigh. She directly grabbed Erina's arm.
"Come on, princess. Don't question his logic. You'll get a headache."
As they left, Rindou waved farewell to Lucifer and Cerberus. "Bye Lucy! Bye Doggy!"
"Bye Rindou!"
She pulled the still-confused Erina away into the night.
Ren watched Lucifer and Cerberus still chatting about mobile games. He shook his head with a smile, and then turned to walk towards the door.
Cerberus's ears perked up. She immediately dropped her phone, stood up, and shouted at Ren.
"Master! Master! Master! Where are you going~? It's late!"
Ren didn't intend to hide it and said directly, putting on a coat. "To pick up a package~ It just arrived at the drop-off point. Cerberus, you..."
"I want to go too! Walkies!"
"Alright. Lucifer? Do you want to come?"
Lucifer looked at her phone, then at the dark street. "I'll watch the shop... Someone has to guard the fort."
"That works too. Cerberus, let's go."
"Mhm!"
Cerberus directly abandoned her new digital friends and ran to stick with Ren, grabbing his hand.
The door closed.
Lucifer looked at the empty shop. It was now left with only herself. The silence was sudden.
She suddenly felt a bit lonely, though she didn't know why.
Normally, she was alone when she worked in Hell. The halls of her castle and palace were hundreds or thousands of times larger than this place, echoing with emptiness. But she had never felt this kind of emptiness before. It felt... cold without them.
She thought for a moment, then gave a self-deprecating smile. "It's really getting stranger and stranger.... I'm going soft."
Thinking of this, Lucifer, as if possessed by a mischievous spirit, picked up her phone. She opened the group chat.
'Hell CEO' (Lucifer): "Ren and Cerberus just went to pick up a package at midnight. What do you think it is?"
It was just a joke. She herself found it funny after sending it, wanting to retract it immediately.
But who knew that everyone in the group chat—who should have been asleep—simultaneously sent the same word.
World's Gourmet (Rindou): "DVDs~"
Call Me President (Kirari): "DVDs~"
Electronic Empress (Ritsu): "DVDs~"
Love Master (Utaha): "Reference materials~ (DVDs)"
Lucifer was stunned.
DVDs?
What would Ren use those for?! He had a smartphone and internet.
But her mind quickly figured it out. Oh. Special interest DVDs.
It must be someone sending them to Ren, and not just once, and this person must not be in the group chat....
Lucifer narrowed her eyes. Her detective instincts flared.
Who is sending my Master smut?
(Welcome to the grand series: Detective Queen of Hell Investigates Group Members Online...)
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