As soon as she walked away, Visha felt the weight on her shoulders disappear.
She hadn't even realized she was that tense.
But what made her that tense?
She, herself, wasn't sure. She didn't have any reason to be tense.
Leader.
The word crossed her mind. Is that why? Because she didn't want to be a leader, she decided to blow up any chance of them thinking of her as a leader.
She shook her head. That couldn't be the reason; there had to be something else.
Inside the cave with the softlight crystals, people still stood stunned.
Heta didn't dare move.
She didn't know whether to hide in a corner or go after her and apologize.
Willa walked over to Xeno.
"What's wrong?"
She wasn't sure why Visha was upset. She didn't believe Heta was the true cause of the outburst.
There is something else that caused the issue.
Uri didn't stay, opting to go after Visha. He could understand her anger.
After taking care of these people all winter, they wanted to go back to the same people who abandoned them. Anyone would be angry.
"I told her you all want to go back." Xeno stood tall, not hiding what he talked to Visha about.
Heta, just out of her trance, heard Xeno. "So what if we want to go back. That's our tribe. Going back is a good thing."
Xeno looked at Heta as though she were an idiot.
"The tribe abandoned us. We were lucky to meet Shasha, who knows so much and is willing to help. As soon as things get better, you are ready to go back to the people who didn't want us. If it were you, how would you feel?"
With that, he walked away, following after Visha and Uri.
"She can go too. No one is stopping her!" She shouted after Xeno.
She turned around, looking at the others.
"Is there something wrong with wanting to go back to the tribe?"
No one answered.
They looked at the way the three people left, each person deep in thought.
Uri caught up to Visha. She hadn't gone too far.
She stood near the entrance of the cave, looking into the distance. What she was thinking, he wasn't sure. But he could feel that the barrier she had put down was on its way to going back up again.
He walked behind her, wrapped his arm around her waist, and kissed her neck. She relaxed into his embrace, closing her eyes.
"You have us. No matter what they may want to do, you still have us."
Visha sighed, "His parents are there. Would he really be willing to leave them and stay?"
"He would. Because he wants us." Speaking softly into her neck.
"I don't want to keep him from his family. I don't mind if they want to go home. I'll treat it like I've never known them. But I don't want him to lose his family." Visha laughed softly. "I didn't even realize I planned to stay here. I kept telling myself that after winter ended, I would go out and find a way back. Then I told myself that I would take you both with me. But I never really thought about your families."
"I never thought about what you would be leaving behind or if you even wanted to go with me." She sighed. "Now they want to go home. I don't have the right to argue. It isn't my place."
She looked ahead, thinking as she spoke. "It hasn't been that long. But I don't want to be separated from either of you. Whether I've accepted you, which I think I have, I don't want to be apart from either of you."
"Then don't."
Xeno's voice came from behind them.
"You don't need to choose. I don't want to go back. If they decide to go, the three of us can go our own way."
He walked until he was standing in front of the two people.
"I know why they want to go. They are scared. The tribe is all they have known. I've learned since I was a child that there is strength in numbers. That the tribe will always be behind us. That's what they want. A tribe of their own. Going back can give that to them."
Visha nodded. She couldn't say anything negative about it. This was the way they grew up. She also knows that humans are pack animals. Even if their beast forms are solitary creatures, the human side of them will still crave the interaction of their own kind.
She could understand it, but she didn't like it.
"I understand. But having been thrown away like that. Don't they feel resentful?"
Uri laughed. "They don't. Didn't you see them carving up the earth trying to find the crystals you talked about? Why do you think they wanted them?"
"For the tribe?"
"Exactly."
Visha sighed. No matter which way she looked at it, everyone needed to sit down to have a talk. She would figure out what they really wanted.
If they chose to go back to the tribe, she wouldn't stop them.
If Xeno wanted to go back, she would go back with him.
She might be able to understand why they love the tribe so much.
Even if he says he doesn't want to go back, it isn't such a bad thing to see where he used to live. It will also help her get a better understanding of what life is like in the different tribes.
While she doesn't want to stay there, she is willing to learn, then leave.
"Tell them we need to talk. Have them pick some of the gloomcap fungus and the bread-moss. If I'm going to talk about something as important as that, I'm not doing it on an empty stomach."
She left Uri's embrace and leaned forward to hug Xeno. She pressed her face into his body.
"If you want to go back, I'll go with you. But I won't stay forever. I won't keep you from your family. But I don't think I want to stay." Visha whispered.
Xeno wrapped his arms around her. "If you aren't there, why would I stay?"
Visha let go of Xeno and pushed him towards the cave where everyone was.
She also asked Uri to go with Xeno.
They both made sure she was alright before going back.
They belong to us. Why would you leave them?
Oh, you're back again? Thought therapy got rid of you.
Nothing can get rid of me. I already told you. I'm a part of you; the sooner you accept it, the easier it will be.
You keep saying that, but I have no idea who you are.
I'm you, I've always been you. In the previous world, it was hard enough to talk to you. But in this world, something has changed.
Honestly, I kind of thought you died.
I will only die if you do.
So why are you just waking up now?
I don't know. I only know that this world is different. I don't know how. It's making me stronger.
Hmmm.
Visha didn't continue to talk to whatever it was. This voice has accompanied her all her life. It was only when she was caught "talking to herself" multiple times that she was admitted.
She started ignoring the voice. She got a clean bill of health not long after. She had been taking meds to keep the voice at bay. But it would still come through sometimes.
Until one day it stopped.
Visha wasn't sure how to feel. She felt empty, hollow. But she was told that she shouldn't be hearing voices, so she assumed this was what other people felt.
That's how her thrill seeking began. To fill the void, she found something for herself to do.
Now, hearing the voice, although she didn't sound enthusiastic, she was happy. Her lifelong companion was back.
And she liked Uri and Xeno.