AVA
She stood nervously in front of Blake's house, staring at the door.
Ava took a slow breath before pressing the doorbell. Its rhythmic ringing was somehow deafening to her.
She took another breath to calm her nerves, telling herself that everything was going to be alright even though she knew it probably wasn't.
Another deep, calming breath.
While she waited for Blake to answer, her eyes wandered over the property.
Blake's lawn was neatly trimmed, the flower beds carefully maintained, and the path leading to the front door was spotless. Even the shrubs along the walkway had been shaped with excessive precision.
It wasn't flashy, but it was neat and beautiful. Everything was clean and cared for, and there was also something warm about it.
Ava had always liked the place.
She'd miss the scenery.
Almost unconsciously, she found herself wondering what Maxim's home looked like.
Ava frowned at herself.
Maxim's home was probably a cold place with few attractive features, she told herself stubbornly. And why the hell was she thinking about Maxim again?
And now, of all times.
Also, she was going to escape him after this meeting with Blake which was even more reason for her to not be thinking about him.
As she questioned herself, she heard footsteps approaching from inside. Blake was coming, she realized.
She licked her lips and straightened, any thoughts of Maxim immediately going out of her mind.
The door opened slowly, but it felt too fast for Ava.
Blake stood in front of her, looking neat in a plain T-shirt and comfortable trousers, his hair styled neatly. His dark eyes were wide, blinking nervously.
For a second, Ava simply stared at him, saying nothing. She was too... nervous.
"Hey," Blake said, finally breaking the silence.
"Hello," Ava replied awkwardly.
"How are you?"
"Good," Ava answered. "You?"
"Same here."
Ava nodded.
Neither of them moved for a moment, just staring at each other.
Another awkward silence followed.
"Can I come in?" Ava asked slowly when Blake didn't say anything.
That seemed to break him out of whatever state he was in.
"Yeah, of course," he said, stepping aside for her.
It was with some effort that Ava made herself go inside.
The place was tastefully but modestly furnished, with pictures of Blake's parents all around and... her.
Shit.
Maybe she should have suggested they meet somewhere else, she thought ruefully.
"Thanks for agreeing to meet with me. I know how busy you are," Ava said to Blake, trying to distract herself from her thoughts.
"You don't have to thank me for that, Ava. I'm your boyfriend," Blake said sincerely, looking into her eyes.
Ava quickly turned her gaze away at his response, firmly fixing her eyes on the living room.
"I know, but still..."
"Let's just forget it," Blake said, gesturing toward the couch.
Ava nodded grimly and went over to the couch, Blake right behind her.
They had spent so much time on this couch, Ava thought as she sat down. Watching movies and making out...
Goodness.
She was getting distracted again, albeit for a less unacceptable reason this time.
"So, I'm guessing you want to talk about what happened the night before yesterday at my parents' party," Blake began in a nervous voice. "About the ring."
Ava slowly turned to him.
She was a little surprised by how direct he was being, but part of her was glad for it.
"Partly," she replied cautiously.
She didn't yet disclose that she wanted to break up with him. She wanted to find the right moment to say it, to break the news to him as gently as possible.
"Can I please begin first?" Blake asked, getting up from beside her, looking anxious.
Ava really would have preferred to go first, she thought, but maybe it was best to hear Blake out first. Give him an opportunity to say his piece before she broke his heart into pieces.
She didn't want him to have any regrets later.
"Uhm... yeah," Ava forced herself to say.
Blake let out a relieved breath.
"Okay. So, first, can I say that I am so sorry for making everything so awkward at the party with the ring? It was a genuine mistake."
"It's okay, Blake. It wasn't that bad, really," Ava tried to say, but she didn't meet his eyes.
"I know you're just saying that," Blake said, raking a hand through his hair. "I saw your face when you saw the ring. You looked like you wanted to be somewhere else."
"Blake..." Ava started.
"It's okay, Ava. I'm not holding it against you. I know you just hated having everyone's eyes on you, and it's not like you hated the proposal itself."
"Uh, what?" Ava said in a low voice, her face paling.
"I'm sorry for putting you in that position," he went on, clearly not hearing her. "I know that's not how you wanted to be proposed to."
Ava looked away from him again.
Blake was definitely getting the wrong impression of why she had looked so unhappy about the proposal, she thought. Not noticing her discomfort, Blake continued.
"Anyway, I decided to make it up to you by doing this right." He looked at her intently. "The way I originally planned, which is in private."
Ava's heart started to pound at Blake's words.
She hoped he didn't mean what she thought he meant.
"What are you talking about?" she asked slowly, looking at him warily.
She got her answer when, the next moment, Blake took out a box, got down on one knee, and held out the emerald ring inside to her.
"Ava Morgan, ever since I met you, I knew that you were the woman for me. So would you do me the honour of making it official and becoming my wife?"
Shit, Ava thought. She definitely should have gone first.
She licked her lips nervously as she stared at the kneeling figure of her soon-to-be ex-boyfriend.
She had never wished so much for Blake's mother to be in the same room as her and maybe for her to faint again and distract Blake like she'd done at the party.
"I can't marry you, Blake. I'm sorry." Ava got up abruptly, backing away from him by one step.
Ava had decided that the time for mincing words was over. She needed to tell him the truth, so that there wouldn't be any more misunderstandings.
Biting her lip nervously, she watched the eagerness on Blake's face immediately give way to consternation.
"I'm so sorry, Blake," she repeated. Her voice came out low and plaintive.
Blake slowly rose to his feet, his gaze firmly fixed on the marble floor.
When he finally looked up at her, dismay filled his expression. The same pained look remained in his eyes as he spoke again.
"But... why can't you, Ava?" His voice was quiet but confused and hurt. "We've been together for a year... We love each other, don't we?"
Blake's question, his face, his voice—the combination of it all made tears spring to Ava's eyes.
Shit, she thought, swallowing hard. He didn't deserve this.
"Please, just say something." His voice carried a note of desperation when Ava still couldn't answer him.
She looked away from him, sucking in a breath.
Ava knew she owed him an explanation, but she also knew she couldn't tell him about Maxim. That would only complicate things further, which was the last thing they both needed.
However, Ava reasoned she could tell him that she wasn't ready to marry him, which was also the truth anyway.
The bitter truth, mind you.
With some effort, she looked at him again.
She opened her mouth, trying to articulate her feelings, but nothing came out.
It didn't feel like a good enough explanation. Not when she'd been with the guy for a whole year.
"I just can't, Blake." The words finally came out in a low voice, an explanation she knew was even less sufficient the moment she said it.
The look of extreme frustration that crossed Blake's face didn't surprise Ava. Nor did she fault him for it.
"That's not good enough, Ava." Blake practically shoved the box back into his pocket.
Ava had never seen him look more stern.
"I know." Ava closed her eyes.
"Then give me an explanation. You owe it to me."
Ava brought a hand to her forehead, feeling pressured. She then dropped it in frustration.
"I'm not ready for marriage, okay?" Ava looked at him, spreading her hands helplessly. "I'm just not. I'm still figuring out my life."
"What exactly is there to figure out?" Blake asked, more confusion and irritation evident in his voice.
"My career, for one," Ava answered in a strained tone. "It's not going very well, if you haven't noticed."
"You can still pursue it after marriage," Blake countered. "And you know I'd help you."
"I want to do it by myself." Ava's voice was low but determined.
"Oh, please. That can't be true." Blake shook his head sceptically. "You had no problem accepting my help in getting that feature from me the day before yesterday."
"I thought you said I got that because of me," Ava said, displeasure evident in her voice.
"Fine, Ava," Blake conceded, raising his hands. "It was all you, Ava. But your stagnant career is still not a good enough reason to explain why you're rejecting me."
"Well, I don't know what else to tell you."
"How about the truth?"
"What truth?" Ava demanded, frustration creeping into her voice.
"The truth about your career not being the aspect of your life you still have to figure out."
Blake paused, his eyes fixed on her.
"The truth about how this is really about Maxim Holloway."