AVA
"Ava? Are you asleep?" Blake asked, knocking again.
A second later, he paused and muttered lowly to himself.
"Stupid question, Blake. If she really is asleep, she can't answer you."
That self-deprecating remark, more than anything else, confirmed the knocker's identity for Ava.
She groaned internally. Not that she didn't adore her boyfriend, but now was a terrible time for him to visit her.
But as the knocking came again, Ava had to accept that the whole thing was happening whether she liked it or not.
"Just a second, Blake. I'm coming!" she called after a sigh.
She then threw off the blanket and climbed out of bed.
The air inside her bedroom was cool and crisp, sending a slight chill across her skin.
Thankfully, she had only taken off her shoes before lying down, so she simply padded across the wooden floor in her socks.
When she opened the door, Blake's hand was still suspended in the air, poised to knock again.
The moment he saw her, his face transformed into a smile, and he lowered his arm.
"Hey, you," he said, looking slightly sheepish. "Did I wake you? You look like you were sleeping."
"Yeah, you did," Ava said, smiling at his perpetual guilty face. "But it's not a problem."
Blake sighed in relief when Ava said this.
The next second, he crossed the distance between them, gently grabbed her face, and pressed his lips against hers.
"I know it's late, but I had to come see you," he murmured after pulling away. "I missed you a lot."
He then hugged Ava and she hugged him back, breathing in his familiar, clean scent, which brought a bigger smile to her face.
The smile faded almost as quickly as it appeared.
She couldn't help but feel guilty that only moments ago, she'd been dreaming about her ex and not Blake.
She gently pulled away from him.
"Come in. Don't stand in the hallway," she said, forcing a cheerful tone.
Blake nodded to her.
Stepping aside, Ava held the door open for him to enter. After he walked into the apartment, she turned to close the door when she heard a crash from inside the room.
She immediately spun around to see what had happened.
A ceramic mug that had been resting on her table now lay in dozens of jagged white pieces across the floor.
Blake stood frozen over the mess, his cheeks turning pink.
"Oh, shit..." he groaned. "Ava, I'm so sorry. I don't know why I'm so clumsy."
Ava couldn't help smiling, even though the mug that now lay shattered had been her favorite.
"It's okay," she assured him. "Really. It's probably my fault for leaving it there instead of putting it back in the kitchenette."
Blake still looked miserable.
He always did whenever he thought he'd disappointed someone—which, in his mind, happened far too often.
Feeling bad for him, Ava decided to throw him a lifeline.
"You can always buy me another one."
His face brightened instantly.
"Really?"
She laughed.
"Really."
"I'll buy it then," he promised eagerly. "And I'll make sure it's even your favorite colour, purple."
Ava nodded eagerly to this, keeping it to herself that that any cup Blake could buy wouldn't be able to top the one that her mom bought for her as a housewarming gift when she had first moved into the apartment.
Still smiling, Ava retrieved the broom from the corner and began sweeping up the broken pieces.
"So," she said casually, "I heard you stopped by the café looking for me."
"Yeah." Blake leaned against the couch. "I just wanted to say hi, but one of your coworkers told me you weren't there."
Ava lowered her eyes to the floor, grateful for the curtain of brown hair falling across her face, hiding the guilt she felt.
She was terrible at concealing things, and she didn't want Blake to guess that she had done something she wasn't supposed to—namely, going to her ex-boyfriend's trial.
Ava and Blake had been together for almost a year, yet she had never told him about Maxim.
Somehow, the subject had never come up.
And she had never been able to bring herself to volunteer the information.
It wasn't because she thought Blake wouldn't understand.
The memories were just... still too ugly and painful to put into words.
"Yeah," she replied, forcing her voice to remain light. "I was at the mall. Sorry."
"Don't worry about it," Blake said casually, going to sit on the couch.
Ava bit her lips.
If he only knew, she thought, turning in his direction.
Not for the first time since they'd started dating, she really looked at Blake.
He was lean and of average height, though still a little taller than she was. His short dark hair was neatly styled, and his dark eyes carried the same warmth they'd always had.
Blake wore his heart so openly that even a stranger could see it.
Then, despite herself, Ava's thoughts drifted back to Maxim, who was taller.
Broader.
Blond.
His features had been sharper, his presence more intense. He'd always hidden his emotions behind a wall of ice. The first time Ava had met him, she'd thought there was something off about him that had, admittedly, drew her in despite every warning.
Ava put the cleaning tools in a corner while wondering how she had managed to have feelings for two men who couldn't have been more different at the same time.
To hide her guilt, Ava turned and approached Blake with a playful smile.
"You say you missed me, mister, but you haven't exactly been around," she teased, planting her hands on her hips as she stood in front of his seat.
Blake sighed while rubbing the back of his head sheepishly.
"I know, and I'm really sorry, Ava. The hospital has been understaffed lately, so work has been piling up, and I haven't been finding time to..."
Ava cut him off by dropping next to him on the couch and pressing her lips firmly against his.
Blake froze for a moment, shocked by the unexpected turn of events. But with Ava's mouth on his, the shock melted away, making room for desire. He pulled Ava closer, kissing her back with much gusto.
This went on for a while, the soft sounds of their kissing filling the room.
After a moment, Ava pulled away from Blake with a playful smile.
"I was just messing with you, Blake. I get that work is crazy for you right now."
"Really?" he asked.
She nodded.
"Yes. Now shut up and kiss me again."
Blake needed no further encouragement. He closed the small distance between them and began kissing her passionately again.
He slipped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer, making her melt into the embrace as she lost herself in the moment.
When Blake pushed her down on the couch, Ava went down readily, still not breaking their kiss.
She hadn't realized just how much she missed Blake until that moment.
At least that's what she thought was happening until, with her eyes still closed, Blake's face suddenly transformed into Maxim's in her mind.
For one terrifying and heady moment, it felt as though she was kissing Maxim instead.
Her eyes flew open in panic.
At almost the same moment, Blake broke the kiss, breathing heavily.
They stared at each other, both flushed.
Ava wondered if she had somehow given her thoughts away to Blake when the guy spoke again.
"Damn," Blake muttered, lifting himself from Ava to sit on the couch. "I'm so sorry, Ava. I'm the one who said I wanted to wait until marriage before I slept with someone, but I don't know what got into me just now."
He looked guilty again.
Guiltier than she was for thinking about another man while he was touching her.
It was weird, but the situation made sense in a way.
Blake was one of the few guys in the world who wanted to wait until marriage to have sex. He wanted his first time to be special, he'd once told Ava, looking moderately embarrassed.
At the time, Ava had thought he was possibly the most endearing individual she'd ever met. And she had readily agreed to his words, especially since she was reluctant to be with anyone sexually since Mr. He-Shall-Not-Be-Named-Right-Now.
Despite herself, Ava forced another smile.
"It's fine, Blake. I got a little carried away too."
Did you ever, a voice in her head muttered.
"Thanks for being so understanding," Blake said, holding her hand.
Ava was about to reply when the sound of a phone ringing filled the space.
Blake gently dropped her hand and used it to reach into his pocket, fumbling for his phone.
"It's the hospital," he said apologetically as he glanced at the screen.
"Go ahead. Take it," Ava replied, taking a step back.
Blake answered immediately.
"Hey, Dad. What's up?"
Soon, he was deep in conversation with his father, with whom he ran a family medical practice. Ava had known the older Cooper ever since she was young, as Blake's mom, Imogen, was Ava's mom's best friend.
Despite this, Ava had only met Blake a year earlier. He'd been living abroad in New York, where he'd been going to a top-tier boarding school since he was younger.
Presently, Blake and his father talked about a patient, throwing around medical terms Ava didn't even understand.
Ava went to get herself a glass of water and watched Blake as he spoke.
It was strange, she thought. Whenever Blake talked about his work, every trace of nervousness in him disappeared.
He became confident.
Decisive.
Like an entirely different person.
It was one of the many peculiarities that intrigued Ava about him.
If only her feelings for him were strong enough to eradicate the ones she had for Maxim...
"No, Dad, it's not a problem. I'll be right there," Blake said, pulling her from her thoughts.
He ended the call and looked at Ava, who was drinking water from a glass.He had an apologetic expression on his face.
"Let me guess, you have to go to the hospital?" she asked, putting the glass down.
Blake nodded.
"I'm sorry. We're under a lot of pressure."
Relief went through Ava upon hearing this. Blake was great, but being around him was assailing her with guilt right now.
"It's okay. They need you there," she made herself say.
God, I'm horrible, Ava thought.
Blake sighed before stepping forward and kissing her forehead again.
"Thanks, Aves. You're the best."
He then looked into her eyes.
"And you won't have to deal with this for long. Soon the hospital will be getting more help, and we'll be able to spend more time together, Ava. I promise."
Ava nodded.
"Of course we will."
Blake pressed a lingering kiss on her lips one last time before heading toward the door.
His hand was resting on the doorknob when he turned to her again.
"And don't stress about tomorrow night either. I'll definitely be there."
Ava frowned at his words, confused.
"Tomorrow night?"
"Yeah. Your parents' twentieth anniversary party, remember?" Blake answered.
Ava's eyes widened. She did not, in fact, remember.
Between the trial and seeing Maxim again, she had completely forgotten about the celebration that was being held at her parents' house tomorrow.
"Of course I remember," she replied to Blake after a brief pause. "I can't wait, in fact."
For a moment, Ava congratulated herself, thinking she'd saved the moment.
Then Blake narrowed his eyes, studying her curiously.
"Are you okay, Aves?" he asked.
"Of course. Always," she answered in the brightest voice she could manage.
Blake didn't seem convinced and looked as though he would ask more questions.
Before he could, his phone rang again.
He glanced down at it with obvious frustration. Sighing, he looked up at her again.
"I'll pick you up tomorrow evening," he said. "Is seven okay?"
Ava nodded.
"Seven is perfect. My shift ends at five-thirty, which will give me plenty of time to get ready."
Blake nodded before opening the door.
"Alright. Love you. Bye."
"Bye," Ava replied softly as the door closed behind him.
The moment he was gone, she let out a long sigh and leaned against the couch.
Only then did she realize just how tense she'd been.
She inhaled deeply and pressed her hands against her face, trying to calm herself.
As her mind relaxed, her thoughts began to wander, and fragments of the dream she'd had earlier unwittingly slipped back into her mind.
Ava's eyes flew open at once.
Nope. Absolutely not.
She wasn't going to think about Maxim again.
She wasn't even going to dream about him. She didn't care if it was impossible; she'd find a way.
If today had taught her anything, it was that she was better off without thinking about Maxim. To do so was to bring only pain.
And besides...
She had something good going with Blake.
Something real.
Something she couldn't afford to ruin. On the contrary, it needed her care.
Yes, Ava thought.
She was going to move on from Maxim.
Really move on.
No more sneaking off to his court trials.
No more stalking him endlessly online, wondering what he was doing or who he was currently dating.
No more living in the past.
She was finally letting him go.
For good this time.