From Paul's point of view, everything happened so fast.
When he was in trouble, feeling pain, and could only use alcohol to numb himself, Shirou suddenly appeared in front of him, and the family reunited.
He was happy to see him again, but he didn't expect Shirou to care more about his friends than his family.
Paul couldn't accept this attitude and got into a fight with Shirou in anger.
Sadly, he couldn't even win.
Angry and frustrated, Paul subconsciously said some inappropriate things to Shirou, completely lacking the behavior of a father, and even let his daughter Norn see his messy state.
Afterward, Paul naturally reflected on himself, his actions, and his behavior.
But all the reflection gathered in the end was still affected by strong emotions and unhappiness, so he had no intention of apologizing at all, and instead started drinking day and night the next morning.
Paul didn't think he had done anything wrong, or rather, he didn't want to think about what he had done wrong.
He just pretended that nothing had happened.
If Shirou didn't take the initiative to find him, he might have just ignored him.
But what Paul didn't expect was that Shirou took the initiative to find him.
Unlike himself when he was young, unlike the time when he had a conflict and was affected by emotions, so he never went home again, and never saw his father again.
Shirou came to see him.
In fact, at that moment, Paul had already realized his problem.
He realized that his attitude towards Shirou was too bad, and he was a very unqualified father.
He hated those stubborn old men who talked to themselves and didn't have the patience to think from other people's point of view when he was young, but he didn't expect to become like that without realizing it.
But he had actually felt it all along.
When facing Shirou, he rarely saw himself as a father.
After all, Shirou had shown wisdom and talent far beyond his peers since he was a child, and his sharp attitude was often beyond Paul's reach.
This gradually made Paul lose his dignity as a father to Shirou, and he often spoke to Shirou in a more humble way.
Because of this, Paul gradually became insecure without realizing it, and even had unrealistic expectations of Shirou when facing him.
He even forgot the most important thing.
That is, he is actually Shirou's father.
As a father, he shouldn't have such unnecessary expectations for his child, nor should he put heavy responsibilities on his child.
The father should carry all the flags himself and bear the most painful responsibilities.
This is the duty of a father.
After realizing this, Paul finally woke up.
He looked back at his situation and suddenly realized that he had misunderstood many things.
He forgot that Shirou was a seventeen-year-old boy. Thinking back to his own seventeen years old, he was still running wild everywhere and had never experienced real hardship.
But Shirou had been thrown to the Demon Continent because of some inexplicable event, and was forced to start a difficult survival in that terrifying place.
Paul knew something about the Demon Continent.
It is the most dangerous land in the world. With the magic power being too dense and concentrated, there are almost monsters everywhere. It's hard not only to survive in that place, but even just walking on the road, you may suddenly encounter terrifying and powerful monsters.
Paul had also heard about the cruelty and ruthlessness of the demons. It lacked the order that a normal society should have, and all that existed were a group of villains who acted recklessly for their own benefit.
Ordinary people affected by the great transfer would at most become slaves if they fell into the Milis Continent, but if they appeared on the Demon Continent, they would almost certainly become food for monsters and beasts.
Shirou was able to survive on the Demon Continent not only because he was powerful, but also because he overcame hardships that ordinary people could hardly imagine.
And it was in that process that Shirou met his friends.
Whether it was the girl named Eris or the demon named Ruijerd, they were already very important to him.
Paul had also had such close and important partners, namely the adventurer team Black Wolf's Fang.
After the great transfer event, the former companions of Black Wolf's Fang even traveled thousands of miles to contact him, and each embarked on a journey to help find the missing Zenith and Paul's family members.
If he had to choose between these lovely and reliable companions and his family, Paul would also be in a difficult situation.
"..."
A large number of thoughts flashed through his mind, and Paul's brain, which had been deeply numbed by alcohol, finally started working after a long time, allowing Paul to realize what he should do now.
He rubbed his face and eyes, and suddenly realized that he looked too messy.
As the saying goes, appearance reflects the heart. When a person's appearance is extremely dejected, it means that their heart must also be in chaos and confusion, their thinking cannot be normal, and it is impossible to make correct judgments.
"Um, can I go wash my face..."
Paul asked Shirou hesitantly.
"Of course."
Shirou nodded. He had hoped that Paul would take care of himself yesterday. His dejected appearance was really sad.
It was probably because of his appearance that the investigation team kept their distance from him.
"Cough cough, um, Vella, help me prepare a washbasin and a mirror."
Paul asked the female knight of the investigation team to help him prepare things.
Shirou noticed that it was the revealing female knight from before, with hardly any cloth on her body.
While Paul was washing his face, he couldn't help but ask her about the situation.
The female knight named Vella didn't mind and calmly explained why she wore such revealing clothes.
Vella used to be an ordinary adventurer, but in that transfer accident, she was teleported to the Milis Continent without any equipment.
Later, she fell into the hands of thieves and became a tool for venting lust.
Despite encountering this tragic experience that would generally make people close their hearts, she overcame this past with her exceptionally strong mental strength.
However, some women failed to overcome it.
For example, Vella's sister, Shelly, was one of them.
Even now, the girl still shivers whenever she is stared at by a man.
Besides the team members, there are several other people like that.
In order to block the men's gazes from those girls, Vella always maintains that kind of dress, so that the men's gazes are all focused on her.
She can be said to be an important support for the search team. It is with her help that Paul, who is not good at communicating with people, is able to build trust with so many people.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought all this up."
Shirou quickly apologized.
Vella smiled and said, "It's okay, I've already overcome it. But Shirou, after actually meeting you, I found that you're just like what Paul said."
"What did Paul say?"
"He said that you are a son he is proud of, and that sometimes you are so good that he feels inferior. He also said that you will reach unimaginable heights in swordsmanship sooner or later, and that he might have a Sword King or even a Sword Emperor-level son. After actually meeting you, it's true. Not only are you graceful, but you are also already a Sword Saint at a young age, which is really admirable. If I hadn't encountered this kind of thing, I'm afraid I would have pursued you."
"This..."
Shirou was quite embarrassed by Vella's words.
He turned his head away embarrassedly and found that Paul also had a look of shame on his face.
The father and son looked at each other, and after finding that their attitudes were both awkward, they couldn't help but pause for a moment, and then laughed.
Unknowingly, all the barriers disappeared.
Next, Paul and Shirou continued to drink.
Since they had already started drinking, they simply didn't stop.
Shirou is generally not used to drinking, but now he is with Paul, so he tried his best to drink some alcohol.
Both of them were slightly drunk, and they gradually opened up about many things.
"Shirou, it's so good that you're still alive. I, I've been afraid all these years, afraid that only Norn and I survived, that you were all dead. If I tried my best to search, but could only find corpses, how terrifying that would be..."
Under the influence of emotions, Paul finally spoke the words from his heart.
He spoke of the fear and despair he had felt since the Great Transfer.
It was because of these fears and despair that he had been drinking all the time, using alcohol to numb his mind and prevent himself from thinking about those overly hopeless possibilities.
He formed an investigation team alone, stepped on unfamiliar land alone, and fought with various mercenaries and knights alone...
But in the end, he got nothing.
He found many missing people, but none of the really important family members.
He would naturally suspect that his family members were all dead.
At this time, Shirou suddenly appeared, but did not show the determination to firmly search for his family, so he would naturally feel angry and impulsive.
He even forgot to think from other people's point of view and imagine how important Eris was to Shirou.
"I'm sorry, Shirou, I'm very sorry, I'm not a good father."
Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the emotions, or maybe it was the atmosphere.
Paul finally said the words that he had been hiding in his heart, but actually longed to say.
"No, you are a very good father, Paul."
Shirou looked at Paul and drank a glass of wine.
He recalled the former Emiya Kiritsugu, who had never said similar words until his death, but Shirou could feel that Kiritsugu also had a similar attitude.
They are all good fathers, they are my fathers.
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