"Ooh, that looks like it hurts.", one of the girls behind me whispers to another.
Are these people even real, if their memories can be erased whenever I do something that can be regretted? What if I commited a crime, would I still be okay?
What the heck made this place, is the person who made this subspace if that's what you'd call it, watching me?
What if I did something that this watcher would judge as unforgivable, would I still be given a second chance?
...
What am I thinking? That's disgusting, I'm mad but I'm the one watching me too, I wouldn't stop judging myself no matter how many second chances I get.
Wait, that's it!
That's my responsibility! Who the heck brought me back?!
*Flashbacks to his necklace*
My cross, I used that for praying everytime, I don't have it anymore. I need to find myself a new one.
Maybe... God? Is this miracle your doing?
Wait. But what if it's that almighty and evil God who brought me here. Is the peace here garanteed, or is it part of some grand scheme to make my vulnerable?
I quickly turn around to the girls staring over me, I stare at their eyes trying to find a hint of this reality revealing itself to be a nightmare after realising this possibility, but instead I'm made out to be the freak in the situation.
I get up and decide to leave in search of a cross to pray with. I'm not Christian, I'm not even religious, but if I were to choose something to worship, it would be God, not religion. The mess of my previous world came from the horrors of religious dogma afterall.
I have great respect for the potential of a benevolent but weak God, and I won't stop siding with hoping to do good in its eyes. Its the only thing than can care about me, the only thing that can truly see me in this false reality, now more than ever.
This potential may not be fulfilled in reality in any way, there may be no God at all apart from the malevolent one that had the strenght to destroy the world, but it's more real to me right now when the presence of this subspace is as unsettling as it is to me.
It's a simulation, a truman show.
I need to get out of here and find someone else who knows of the world I come from, I cannot be the only one, I won't believe it.
...
"I'm going to the bathroom."
"Excuse me, you need to ask for permission first!", the teacher yells at me from the place she's instructing the other students.
"...Okay, can I go to the bathroom?"
"No, ask again."
"What else am I supposed to say?!"
"Please."
"...I'm 34 years old, I don't need to take this shit."
"EXCU-huh? What?", the teacher goes from disiplinary to confused after realising what I said in the first part of what I said.
*close*
I get my bag and make my way for the school's gate.
I realise I don't have a car, my parents won't help me to skip school, and the school bus won't be driving until the school day ends.
Maybe I can find a regular bus stop to take me to the mall?
It's not even noon yet, I'll end up skipping regular classes as well.
"Come on! Quickly before the teachers notice something.", a group of girls sneak off to carpool in the parking lot.
"Um, excuse me! Are you guys skipping?"
"Yeah, and what the fuck about it?"
Damn, they think I'm a snitch.
"...I'm skipping too. Do any of you know the way to a public bus stop in this area?"
"Hm? Oh!", they all start whispering amongst each other.
"Do, do you want to come with us?"
It's strange to see so much rebellious teenerager personality in these potentially fake people. If this is a simulation, it's a damn good one. I guess I'll have to treat them as real people if I want the situation to go my way.
Well, I guess they're inviting me because they find the experience adventurous, and it'll be more exciting for them if someone of the opposite sex joined them. This is really dumb of me to compare, but it's as if I'm in my popular phase all of a sudden to be welcomed like this into an intimate situation for a girls only group.
"Where are you going to? I'm hoping to go to the mall."
"We were planning to go to McDonalds first."
Wait, do I even have money? Shit.
A cold sweat overcomes me as I am already so quick to disappoint their expectation to hang out together.
I remember that they probably aren't real people, so their expectation and feelings don't matter, but something within me in carrying out that attitude in such a realistic interaction sickens me, so I can't help but to still be empathetic despite the inefficency.
Maybe I'll have to take advantage of social circumstances in order to get more opportunities for myself like getting a job anyways if I want to get money in the future.
Oh yeah, speaking of which.
*Checks phone for digital bank*
Thank God, I did have a bank account at this age.
"Um, sorry, I was just checking my balance. I'm up for a thickshake and fries I guess."
"Sweet! Hop on in<3"
"Ahaha, thank you thank you."
Their friendliness, boardering flirtatious energy, is uncomfortable. I'm not in love with any of these girls afterall, despite how much girls fluster me since I haven't seen any in years.
I sit in the back of the car. Three of us squeeze in, shoulder to shoulder, as I sit in the middle seat.
"What's your name?"
"My name's Zack."
"Hi Zack!", they all say.
TF is going on?
Okay, I'm starting to find my own inner-voice to be annoyingly judgemental of these situations, I should work on easing up.
"What's all your names?"
"I'm Sai.", says the gal with a mature presence in the front passenger seat.
"I'm Evelyn.", says the driver who did most of the talking earlier thinking I was a potential snitch, she gives off delinquient vibes, but I get the feeling she actually goes to the gym to support that dominant personality of hers, I should be careful at least until I gain my own physical strength back.
"I'm... Amy.", the girl to my left says shyly.
"I-I'm Emily!", the girl to my right says forcing herself to act energetic/socialable.
"Haha, nice to meet you all. Thank you very much for inviting me, and thank you Evelyn."
"Oh my, we've got a gentleman in the car~ Ahahaha!", Evelyn teases.
They all seem to be on the same page with how they want to treat me.
I feel more anxious than exicted about being in the spotlight now. I wonder how I would even handle being a celebrity in that 'second Hollywood' dream?