The walk home was extremely quiet besides the muffled murmurs of our parents behind us but me, Kim and Art were all dead silent and it's pretty obvious why I mean what is there to say. Our friend just got an Element while we got basically stranded left in this town out on the outskirts of the kingdom being ordinary people while he gets to live all of our dreams while he just always seemed whatever about it. At least that's probably what Art and Kim were thinking. I was silent for a different reason I know that my close friend just got cursed with his worst nightmare and I felt so much about it, I felt jealousy for him getting to live out all of our dreams while he didn't even want one its not fair that were cursed to live her in this town while he gets to be a hero and one of the most beloved people on the planet, I felt pity for him to tho even with all those thoughts going across my mind deep down I still felt pity for him I still felt bad I hated myself for feeling jealous right now since really all he deserves is pity he's living his worst nightmare everything about his life sucks right now but I still want what he haves. So I couldn't speak. I mean what could I possibly say? I can't deal with helping Art and Kim cope with this when I can't even cope myself but I know we shouldn't be jealous of him. His life right now is probably the furthest thing from what they're imagining. They probably think he's the happiest kid in the world right now that he is about to get everything we've ever wanted even though we wanted it so much more then him and the partially right with that I guess but still they don't how deep it actually goes, they don't get how badly he doesn't want this, how badly he probably wishes one of us got it instead. His life is the worst possible reality for him and I'm sitting here jealous of him, no we all are. "Its not fair" Art mutters with his head down as we wal"It's not fair." he looks up this time and says it louder clearly wanting us to hear it and respond " I know" Kim says clearly not to happy about this whole thing either I can see where this is going and wanting to quickly stop both of them from saying stuff they'll regret I speak up "Yeah but it's not Rien's fault he got one I guess he just has… better luck" the last two words come off my mouth slowly since I know there a lie but there truly are not better words for the other two to hear and maybe even me too. After that we all walk in silence for a bit longer. After about a minute or two Kim speaks up again "Yeah you're right, well I guess we might as well support him especially since it's what he would've done for us." He says apparently coming to peace with it real quick. I mean to be fair he did always say he knew the chances were extremely low so he never did get his hopes too high. Art on the other hand never had his hopes down he always truly believed he would get an Element he never had doubt that he wouldn't so I can't imagine he's gonna take the fact he didn't and Rien did well "I'm gonna need more time before I can get over this like you two" Art says while smiling for the first time since we took the test. It wasn't a "happy" smile or a "sad" smile but more of a guilty one. After that it didn't take long for me to arrive home and when I did I quickly went up to my room to sleep. So much happened in the last 12 hours that thinking just hurt. Right as I was drifting off tho my mom called my name "Elijah come down!!" After groaning and stretching I hop out of bed and go downstairs to see my mom in the kitchen with toast with butter and cinnamon, my favorite food clearly trying to cheer me up. "Thanks" I say as I sit down to eat it "of course hon, so Rien is an Elemental now huh" I don't really love where this conversation is going but this is my Mom so I don't really get a choice in this conversation. "Yeah I guess" "It's weird though it always seemed like he wanted to be an Elemental the least out of all of you." "Yeah I know he just got really.. Lucky I guess ""What was with that pause there?" She's too perceptive man. "It's just annoying and I'm jealous that's it." "Really cause he didn't seem to happy when he came out "ughhh" I sigh knowing that she's not gonna stop prying til I tell her what I know "Finee I'll tell you all about last night since you clearly want to know" "No I'm just a doting mother who's looking out for her son and his friends." she says in a tone to make it seem like she wasn't just being nosy and that it was something that needed to be done "Rien doesn't want an Element at all he's terrified of the thought of one so right now instead of lucky he's actually just extremely unlucky" "oh.. Well why doesn't he want one?" she asks since she is clearly extremely interested in this which ticks me off so I try to end this conversation as fast as possible "Because he doesn't want to leave everyone here behind he'd miss us too much.. And his family too." "Huh well that really changes this situation huh instead of this being a great day for everyone now it just kind of seems like a tragedy." she says in a tone like she's just thinking out loud but that just pisses me off more I mean me, Kim and Art just got our dreams crushed today even though Rien did too our days still would have sucked even if he wanted an Element. "It wouldn't have been a good day anyway." I mutter under my breath trying to express everything I'm feeling right now as quietly as I can "huh what was that baby" my mom asks, her ears basically perking up while asking "It wouldn't have been a good day anyway!! I mean even IF Rien wanted an Element WE all would have still not gotten one I would have still gotten my dreams crushed today my day would have been ruined no matter what everything still would have sucked my day just sucks more because I know I'm a terrible no good person for being jealous of him right now since he's living out his worst nightmare right now while I'm just living through a bad day but this is the worst bad day I've ever had and I feel bad for feeling bad and everything just sucks right now." I finally let everything out as tears start to stream down my cheeks "There you go hon let it all out, stop trying to act all grown up when you're still a kid I know everything sucks right now I know you feel guilty for everything you're feeling right now I know but still you're a great person." I cry harder as she embraces me realizing this is why she called me down to help me get this all of my chest I decide I should just let everything go now "Am I really a good person shouldn't I feel bad shouldn't I only feel bad for Rien right now I'm sure that's what a good person would do." "Nope that's what a perfect person would do but those don't exist and human beings are always gonna be self centered anyways so I truly don't think a human being could do that." My Mom responds but that still left me with so much on my mind how she's clearly wrong if I was just a better friend I could share the sadness with him but instead of expelling that and shooting her down I ask her "What would a good person do then" she looks down at me blinks and then gives me the most motherly smile you could give "Well a good person always tries to be their perfect person" she answers in that same matter of fact tone except this time instead of upsetting me it just makes me calm down and makes me stop crying. After a little longer Mom finally lets go "You can go back upstairs now if you want I just wanted to help you calm down Eli." and with her permission I tell her I'm gonna take a nap since everything just made me tired now. After scarfing down my bread of course. When I got upstairs I immediately jumped under my cover and got comfortable. "A good person tries to always be their perfect person" those words continue to spin around my head until I fall asleep.
