Shirou couldn't sleep, looking at the clock as time ticked by.
"Am I worthy to be the hero of justice?" In his mind scenarios of him getting killed by Sakura and watching the holy grail burn everything in fire surged.
One was a selfless choice while the other was selfish.
Giving up on choosing will be the most selfish, losing Saber and Archer would've been meaningless.
[A/N: I'll be calling the 'bandage' shroud instead.]
Shirou looked at the shroud blocking Archer's magic circuits.
"I have to do this!" Shirou pulled off the shroud, all of it. The burning pain made him feel like his insides were burning. Magic circuits layering on top of each other.
The feeling of being engulfed in flames. The sensation of forgetting his memories slightly.
His hair slightly turning white, his senses was slowly getting numb. Yet the pain was still growing.
And soon the hell has begun. Everyone in the house jolted at the sound.
*Crunch*
"if you don't mind me, I'll be taking my sleep for now. Go take care of your little step-brother,"
Illya understood what Ryouma had meant, instantly rushing to his room to see. The walls were being covered in blood where Shirou's bed turned into a massive piles of swords in reverse growing big.
Rin in her pajamas also arrived to witness this scene.
Both jumped to stop him. Rin tried to at best slow down the process, while Illya grabbed the shroud. And Rider grabbed Shirou. Rushing towards Kotomine Kirei.
---
It was a slightly different scene. "Am I selfish?" In front of Shirou stood 3 different Shirou's.
"That's a hard question." A version of himself. With his signature orange, red hair wearing a small amount of mediaval type armor looked at him.
"Your essence and origin is 'sword' but you're not us, so it's your choice how you use it," an older version of himself with a slightly tanner body looked away.
A version of himself but completely white hair, and black body didn't speak.
"Then tell me what choice you made!" Shirou screamed at them wanting a clear answer from the older versions of himself.
"You must understand, we're neither heroic spirits nor servants. I held my beliefs and marched forward even after having regrets, I reached Saber." The armored one spoke proudly.
"Thanks to Archer I understood the weight of my ideals but you already know it didn't you?" The second one confirmed Shirou's answer.
And the third. "You're most likely me, using the arm forgetting everything, with only the goal of becoming a hero of justice."
The second one looked sad. "Our dreams were only inherited, but you you're different, even special than any of us! You have a chance to live a normal life without ever needing magi!"
The first one took over the conversation. "Go and live a short but happy life and have a family. Even if your origin and essence is 'sword' what about it."
"Is there a way to save Sakura?" Shirou felt hopeless as everyone has told him to give up.
The third one looked at Shirou. "TRIGGER OFF," the magic circuits blazing with green, Shirou could feel the pain increasing in his body.
"TRACE ON," a zigzagged blade come into view, "this is your answer!"
The second one smiled sorrowfully, "This is rule breaker, it can help with Sakura. But at your current point it's impossible, you have gone beyond the breaking point!"
Soon the third one stabbed the sword into Shirou.
With that he lost his consciousness.
---
Inside the Emiya resident.
"You're different," Sakura looked at Ryouma.
"Good morning puppet of the grail," Ryouma's eyes almost mockingly looked at Sakura. "Do you know why you still feel the pain? It's kinda funny!" Yet he didn't even laugh instead his gaze was cold.
Since Sakura didn't speak Ryouma continued. "You see, when 'Alaya' well you wouldn't know what that is... think of it as part of me released its mana, you attacked, hitting Gilgamesh instead. Enkidu instead of protecting Gilgamesh, killed you."
As if recalling the events, she started spasming. "Stop don't!"
"You know why that pain in your chest hurts more?" Ryouma took a long breath, "Because your guilt is eating you alive, Shirou might feel even more of a burden for loving you."
"No please, stop!" Sakura almost shrieked crying at the pain.
"Here," Ryouma placed a shard kitchen knife on Sakura's bed, "If you love him, prove it!, kill yourself and everything stops! all of it will end!"
Sakura crying. "Why don't you just kill me yourself?!"
"It's no fun, make your choice, either get killed by Shirou or think of his pain and lessen his suffering by killing yourself,"
"Why?, why?, why am I the only who suffers!, I never wanted this I never wanted any of it! I just wanted to live a normal life!" Sakura's agonizing scream filled the resident.
Sakura grabbed the knife and tried to kill herself but the sharp metal didn't pierce her body. Ryouma holding the sharp point of it his hands bleeding.
"Pathetic," his eyes anger was evident. "At least say goodbye to Shirou or something!"
"Why? why? stop me when you said I should die! Why are you protecting me!" Sakura cried again even her wish of death was stopped.
Ryouma pulled the knife away from her. "I had to kill my family to have magic circuits, you just had to lay there and get raped, and here right now you want to die while I'm trying to kill that thing that made it happen."
Ryouma left the room with the bloody knife while his wounded fingers leaving a trail on the ground.
---
At the church everyone looked at Shirou's body without any swords.
While the priest stood at the side eating spicy tofu noodles.
"Umm, Kirei this church is slightly..." She couldn't say it clearly.
"Ruined," Kirei spoke what she was about to say, "A small fight occurred here."
Part of the church was destroyed beyond recognition. If someone didn't see the chairs, stadium and a massive cross. They would think of it as a ruined house or an old grave yard.
"He's waking up!" Illya spoke seeing Shirou slightly move his fingers.