Ficool

Chapter 45 - Chapter 44: 『The Plague of Despair』

「(Gasp)... Alas... No one... no one will ever want to marry me now...」 (Subaru)

「Nn.」 (Shiroko)

「...I thought you two were running late, but you finally made it... What on earth were you doing?」 (Serika)

After Hoshino had told them the two would catch up later, Shiroko arrived wearing a look of total satisfaction, while Subaru followed with his hair a complete, tangled mess. They trailed behind the three who had gone ahead, the air between them thick with a kind of melodramatic tension that suggested they were far more than mere comrades.

「You must take responsibility for stripping away my purity, Shiroko!」 (Subaru)

「Nn...」 (Shiroko)

「What did you actually do to him?!」 (Serika)

Subaru's long-guarded innocence—untouched until now—had vanished. As a "counter-caress" in response to his teasing, Shiroko had "caressed" every inch of his body until he was a disheveled wreck. She now had to bear the consequences of her actions.

Subaru hadn't felt this violated or seen his appearance so thoroughly sabotaged since a neighbor's cat had aggressively scratched his face years ago. He had never wanted Hoshino and the other two students to see him in such a pathetic state.

「Dammit... Speaking of lunch, aren't the dining spots in Abydos far too out of reach right now?」 (Subaru)

「Yes... Only one person has managed to hold out in Abydos. Kaiser's forced eviction orders made him close his long-standing restaurant, but he still fights on, serving food from a mobile cart...」 (Ayane)

「A mobile cart...」 (Subaru)

Mobile food vendors were rare here, and in Subaru's experience, they usually sold hot soup. Since he had mapped the outskirts of Abydos earlier and hadn't encountered this cart, its reappearance likely resulted from the retreat of Kaiser's forces—a retreat he had triggered.

While he knew he should stay alert for sudden variables in this world, he didn't want to ruin the girls' peace with his anxieties. Hoshino had made an effort to invite him, and he couldn't let her initiative go to waste.

「By mobile cart, do you mean a small fast-food stand?」 (Subaru)

「Something like that. It's a ramen shop called "Shibaseki" (Shiba Inu Forest).」 (Hoshino)

「I used to work there part-time... But because of those Kaiser bastards, the Master had to relocate. He's been through a lot because of them.」 (Serika)

「Come to think of it, I guess I really did achieve something great.」 (Subaru)

「「You're only realizing this now?」」 (Serika and Ayane)

「──Only now.」 (Subaru)

Essentially, a lone boy had stood up to a military corporation that declared war on him, then managed to repel and defeat them. In Japan, that would be like taking on the entire national army. Since he knew little about Private Military Companies (PMCs), this was his only frame of reference. But when he considered that one individual had opposed an entire organization...

「...」

「That's actually terrifying!」 (Subaru)

「Yes, Mr. Subaru... Hoshino-senpai briefed me on the situation. The position you hold now is equivalent to the supreme authority in Kivotos.」 (Ayane)

「The role of the General Committee Official, and the powers granted to it, are beyond simple description. Given your status—especially since you were already dealing with Kaiser's subsidiaries—we didn't expect you to come down and handle things directly...」 (Ayane)

「Rin-chan (the GSC Vice President) asked me to intervene. Regardless, I'm fully aware of the weight of my actions—or at least, I think I am.」 (Subaru)

「──Besides, I managed to save Ayane and Serika. That alone makes everything worthwhile.」 (Subaru)

Subaru's background and past in this world seemed incredibly complex. To them, he was a "superhuman" who had suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

To Ayane—the Executive Committee's financial officer who spent her days sending appeals to the Valkyrie Police—seeing someone like Subaru offer such immense help without a clear motive felt both suspicious and unnerving.

「...By the way, we've walked a long distance already... Are you sure "Shibaseki" really operates as a mobile cart?」 (Subaru)

「Don't worry~ We're regulars there. While you were asleep, the Master called me to say he'd resumed business and invited us to eat.」 (Hoshino)

The path Hoshino led them down was deserted. Since Abydos was largely abandoned, every corner felt desolate—a loneliness amplified by the grit of sand the wind forced into their mouths.

Subaru felt a bit awkward being the only one who hadn't previously worked at this restaurant like the girls. Just as he began to wonder if the shop was merely a mirage in this wasteland, a cry rang out:

「Ah...! Master Shiba!... Seeing him is such a relief. He's finally back...」 (Serika)

「To Serika-chan... that man is a great benefactor. She spent a long time working for him.」 (Ayane)

「...Where is he?? Are your eyes really that sharp?」 (Subaru)

「Nn. Look over there.」 (Shiroko)

Where Shiroko pointed, a small red speck—resembling a bean—was visible. It was the glow of the shop's banner, lit despite the daylight. Subaru continued to be amazed by the physical differences between himself and the residents of this world; what Shiroko saw wasn't just ordinary vision, but something that transcended human senses.

──Minutes later, the shop took shape, and the distinctive scent of ramen wafted toward them—a potent, irresistible blend of broth, garlic, and fat.

「That is a quintessentially delicious smell.」 (Subaru)

「Master Shiba is incredibly generous. Since we're always struggling financially, he gives us free extras every time we visit. Even though a bowl is only 580 yen, the portion is massive—enough to feed more than one person—and he even brings five extra bowls so we can share...」 (Hoshino)

「...He sounds like a truly good man.」 (Subaru)

「Yes. Although everyone else abandoned Abydos, the Master stood his ground here until the very last moment.」 (Ayane)

「Nn...──Wait. It looks like some customers beat us to it.」 (Shiroko)

Having customers at a mobile cart in such a desolate place might seem normal elsewhere, but in current Abydos, it was cause for alarm. After Kaiser's military declaration and the subsequent exodus of residents, a full restaurant was highly suspicious.

Hoshino approached the cart with a stern expression.

「──」

「You guys are really...」 (Hoshino)

「Oh, you've arrived too. Welcome.」 (Master Shiba)

Subaru's eyes fell upon Master Shiba. True to his name, he was of the beastfolk race, taking the form of a Shiba Inu dog. As for the customers sitting at his counter──

「Aru!?」 (Subaru)

「Hi—... Hiba... n-no, wait a second please...」 (Aru)

「(Munch)... Subaru!?」 (Aru)

「Hello, Subaru-kyun. How are you? Are you doing all right?」 (Mutsuki)

They were the members of "Problem Solver 68" (Benriya 68).

They occupied the table's four seats, sharing a single massive bowl of ramen. Just as Hoshino had mentioned, Master Shiba had provided extra bowls for them to share the meal, even though they had only ordered one 580-yen dish.

「My, my. Do you all know each other? I only have three empty seats left right now, so please wait a moment.」 (Master Shiba)

The Master spoke politely while bringing out waiting chairs for them. Subaru wondered how this man made any profit with such excessive generosity. He felt a lump in his throat, seeing them again after what felt like months of absence.

「A-Aru...──It's really been a long time! Since I couldn't reach you, I was worried sick. I thought Kaiser had done something to you!」 (Subaru)

「Subaru! You're the one who pulled that dangerous stunt the moment we parted ways...! Wait! What about your injury? You were bleeding heavily. Did you really escape from the hospital already...?」 (Aru)

「Ah... well, actually...」 (Subaru)

Aru's face paled as she listened to his vague reply. Though Subaru had lost consciousness, she was one of the witnesses who had seen him on the brink of death.

After the PMC's declaration of war, the plan was to track the soldiers based on Kayoko's strategy and attack the CEO, but...

「──This is wrong! You only have one life! How dare you challenge Kaiser in such a wretched state, while you were on the verge of death...!!」 (Aru)

Aru stood up angrily, attempting to approach Subaru, but Hoshino stepped in between to block her path.

All of Problem Solver 68 had seen Subaru's broadcasts from Abydos. They couldn't believe the boy who was recently bedridden had launched an assault on an outpost.

「...I didn't know Subaru had acquaintances in criminal organizations. Miss "CEO," was your arrival in Abydos a coincidence? Or do you have business with Subaru and Abydos?」 (Hoshino)

「We are comrades who have entrusted our lives to one another. I came here only to crush the "Great Evil" Subaru told me about. And what about you? What's your connection to Subaru that gives you the right to drag him into Abydos's private affairs...」 (Aru)

「If there is something in Abydos you refuse to lose, I think you should be the first one to risk your life, don't you agree?──」 (Aru)

「「...」」

「Stop, stop right there! While having you two fight over me makes me feel both embarrassed and flattered, this ramen made with love is going to get cold.」 (Subaru)

「The Master served this with kindness, so let's eat first and then talk calmly, okay?」 (Subaru)

Seeing Subaru's distress and the Master's awkward face, Aru sat down quietly. The situation needed mutual understanding, not a brawl.

「...Right. The Master brought extra seats, so I'll sit there to eat. Miss "CEO"... Ms. Takanashi (Hoshino), I'm sure you two have plenty to discuss, right?」 (Kayoko)

「Th—Then! I, I will too...!」 (Haruka)

「You saved me, Kayoko. You're as considerate as ever. Alright, I'll join you and Haruka──」 (Subaru)

「「Subaru stays here.」」

──There was no room for debate. Hands reached out from both sides to seize him, dragging him toward the table in a display of total helplessness. The warm steam of the ramen felt like a suffocating mist, trapping him. Shiroko whispered a chilling promise in his ear: 「You'll tell me the details of your brush with death later.」 Subaru felt the flavor of his long-awaited lunch vanish instantly.

「You seem to lead a hard life, kid.」 (Master Shiba)

「If you think so, then help me... Master Shiba...」 (Subaru)

「From what I've heard, your reckless behavior is to blame, so I have no comment. I'll give you a free extra, but... is one bowl enough for you?」 (Master Shiba)

「No. To celebrate your reopening and show my appreciation, I'll cover everyone's bill. Give everyone a regular-sized bowl and tally it up... Ah, do you accept electronic payments?」 (Subaru)

「──Certainly. You're a generous man.」 (Master Shiba)

Subaru seized the chance to look composed. Thanks to his position as the General Committee Official, he could pay via Arona. The bill would be charged to the General Student Council's expenses, so he wouldn't pay a cent out of pocket. He wasn't broke anymore; he could afford to treat everyone to nine bowls of ramen.

●○●○●

「So that's how it is...」

「Meaning the "CEO-chan" (Aru) is Subaru's ally and came here to take down Kaiser.」 (Hoshino)

「Exactly. I involved myself in Abydos's affairs of my own free will. Does that satisfy you?」 (Subaru)

「Mmm... But that doesn't justify them dragging you into these problems and leaning on you like this...」 (Aru)

「That was also because of a promise I made to myself. I did it because I wanted to. Aru, you know me, don't you?」 (Subaru)

「Nn. But that way of talking makes me feel like the others don't understand you as well as they should.」 (Shiroko)

「I apologize for that.」 (Subaru)

──In the end, Shiroko couldn't wait and had to intervene. As eight people crowded around the narrow table, Subaru grumbled inwardly. He had to provide a brief explanation of his history with Problem Solver 68 and his experiences since arriving in Abydos, acting as the mediator until both sides finally reached a level of understanding.

I watched Master Shiba briskly clean the empty ramen bowls while I tried to rest my throat, which had gone dry from all the explaining. I sat there with girls surrounding me on every side. In fact, Shiroko, Aru, Mutsuki, and Hoshino were all sitting incredibly close to me!

「...── Mutsuki, please don't do this with anyone else, okay? You'll definitely give people the wrong idea. Don't blame me if it ends up causing you trouble or making people resent you.」 (Subaru)

「Oh? What's this? Does this mean... little Subaru is feeling shy right now?」 (Mutsuki)

She was wrapping her arms around my neck from behind, so I addressed her directly since she was physically the closest. She knew exactly what she was doing, intentionally messing with my feelings. If I showed any reaction, she'd win this game—and "Naughty Boy" Subaru couldn't afford to lose a prank war.

「Let's say I'm half-embarrassed and half-genuinely concerned. You shouldn't play with a teenage boy's feelings like that.」 (Subaru)

「Fine, fine. Since I'm getting some pretty sharp looks from that wolf girl over there, I'll stop here ♡.」 (Mutsuki)

「Nn.」 (Shiroko)

Mutsuki stepped back, finally freeing me from that circle of beauty. For someone who hadn't lived a high school life full of romantic adventures, this would have been a dream scenario. But right now, I couldn't afford to focus on those heart-fluttering moments.

The reason... was it Shiroko's fiery gaze? Or Hoshino's tightening grip on my arm? Or perhaps Haruka in the background, nearly losing her mind while arguing with Aru? All of those were terrifyingly true, but they weren't the main reason.

「Now, let's get down to business.」 (Subaru)

「──As I explained, one last member is still waiting for us to save her.」 (Subaru)

「...You mean the daughter of the wealthy Nephthys family, Nonomi Izayoi, right?」 (Aru)

「The opponent this time is a major corporation that rivals Kaiser in power and influence. You can't face enemies like that without prior intel or a solid plan. Still, you're hiding something up your sleeve, aren't you, Subaru?」 (Aru)

「That's right. The enemy is clear this time, but they are formidable. I feel that "Subaru and his friends" alone won't be enough to get the job done. There might be a few holes in the plan I've come up with.」 (Subaru)

「...?」

「──!」

Why talk like this? No, I knew it from the start. Since our first meeting—despite their claims of being a criminal organization that breaks every rule—Problem Solver 68 was...

「Honestly, you guys are surprisingly and amazingly kind-hearted.」 (Subaru)

「Oh? How did you conclude that?」 (Aru)

「──From everything.」 (Subaru)

「Could you be a little less blunt!?」 (Aru)

「No, because in fact...」 (Subaru)

「Enough! I get it! You don't need to say more!! ...Anyway, isn't there something you want to ask us?」 (Aru)

This was a perfect setup. To a movie buff like Subaru, the conversation flow felt so delightfully clichéd that he could predict the next lines with his eyes closed. If the scene I imagined was about to happen, it would be pure bliss. It's a trope so common in movies and anime, yet so rare in reality. For that reason, I stood up. I stood up and addressed Aru, who stood before me.

「──Problem Solver 68.」 (Subaru)

「I have a mission for you. We need to help someone—or rather, "kidnap" her to ensure her safety. The motive is pure charity, but the reward will come from the General Student Council's budget.」 (Subaru)

「The operation name: "Operation Recover Nonomi Izayoi"! The enemy is a massive corporation in the hands of villains, and the risks are immeasurable!」 (Subaru)

「Do you accept this assignment──?」 (Subaru)

「Heh... I'd like to say it depends on the money, but since you're a special, regular client, I'll give you a deal.」 (Aru)

「──Of course! Problem Solver 68 will take the job!」 (Aru)

The confidence on her face was the most reassuring sight I'd ever seen. With those words, Aru reached out to shake Hoshino's hand. After a brief moment of shared emotion, the two shared an incredibly firm handshake.

●○●○●

Lunch ended peacefully, but the atmosphere remained fraught with risk. It was now 4:30 PM. People say the bitterness of pain fades once it passes, but for Subaru, anxiety was a chronic ailment that never truly let go.

The fear of death clung to him like a leech, embedding itself in his very soul. Fortunately, Haruka refrained from any erratic outbursts, and Hoshino's suspicions remained dormant, allowing them to settle the dispute before it spiraled out of control. One could only feel grateful for Aru and her team's kindness and their unwavering—if eccentric—sense of justice.

「Is the stage finally set...?」 (Subaru)

「I can confirm that. Since we are avoiding direct contact with Suou Asagiri, this distribution of roles is currently the most effective approach.」 (Arona)

「Having you with me makes a world of difference.」 (Subaru)

Subaru had a maneuver in mind. As Aru had guessed, he harbored a secret strategy—a mental simulation sharpened by the agonizing memories of his many deaths. Through those failures, he had finally mapped out the perfect set of movements.

The agreement with Suou was simple: he would deliver Subaru to the Nephthys Corporation's boardroom where Nonomi would appear. Subaru would then execute a solo infiltration—a reckless tactic that had practically become his trademark. Despite the danger, it remained his most viable option in these circumstances.

「How much longer will I keep saying "I have no other choice"?」 Subaru wondered.

He had gone from sitting among a group of beautiful girls to standing alone in a place as desolate as a wasteland. He was at the station now. He would board a train managed by Suou to charge toward the enemy's stronghold. Suou's responsibility ended the moment he delivered his passenger; Subaru would handle the rest alone.

He had introduced Suou to his Abydos companions as an "anonymous collaborator," a vague description that earned him a harsh scolding. Perhaps this suicide mission served as the bitter medicine an idiot who insisted on working alone truly needed.

"Team A, are you ready for the tracking?" (Subaru)

"Team A here! All clear on our end~" (Mutsuki)

"Team B reporting. If anything happens to Subaru-san, Hoshino-senpai will rush in to save him! We're standing by!" (Ayane)

"Team C...── Actually, that Haruka girl is breathing quite heavily while clutching a bomb. Is she really okay?" (Kayoko)

"...She's likely fine." (Aru)

"What do you mean "likely"!? What!? "Likely"!!??" (Subaru)

"Aru! Keep her under control!" (Subaru)

"O-Of course! Leave it to us── Haruka! Haruka, not yet!" (Aru)

"────"

As the first phase of the plan, everyone had to infiltrate the meeting site. To do so, they would follow the train's path.

Subaru's only move involved serving a "Compulsory Inspection Order"—a legally binding document Arona had meticulously drafted—to the Nephthys Board of Directors. He demanded Nonomi's return, citing Hoshino's refusal, in her capacity as Abydos Vice President, to accept Nonomi's forced resignation.

While legally sound, this maneuver guaranteed a physical clash. Subaru knew the company would meet his papers with nothing but condemnation and violence. To prepare for the inevitable fight, he had orchestrated an alliance between Problem Solver 68 and the students of Abydos.

Subaru had assembled his "Dream Team." Team A, consisting of Shiroko and Mutsuki, took charge of the recovery operation. Team B featured Hoshino as a solo vanguard, supported by the tactical intelligence of Ayane and Kayoko. Team C, led by Haruka, aimed to tip the scales by bringing total destruction to the battlefield, while Serika and Aru handled the rear guard—and the equally vital task of keeping Haruka in check.

「It's the strongest lineup in history. I know we can't be complacent, but I feel a profound sense of relief.」 (Subaru)

「Arona is managing the troop movements. We've paired the best with the best to form a squad that looks exactly like the Avengers.」 (Subaru)

「Leave the situational assessment to me.」 (Arona)

A dry throat and stinging eyes—sensations that fit this barren desert all too well. Subaru didn't know what awaited him, but the familiar, harsh desert landscape offered its usual cold welcome.

He was anxious, naturally. As long as Suou remained his collaborator, he couldn't predict Hoshino's reaction. The threat of betrayal loomed constantly, making true peace of mind impossible. Yet, he realized that if he couldn't trust this team, there was no one left in the world to trust.

── 「It's here.」 (Subaru)

At the derelict station, which looked as though it hadn't seen a caretaker in a century, a train pulled in. It looked brand new, as if it had just rolled off the assembly line, standing in stark, surreal contrast to its dilapidated surroundings.

「Whew.」 (Subaru)

「On time, for once.」 (Subaru)

「You're seven seconds late, Suou.」 (Subaru)

「...Your sharp tongue hasn't changed, I see.」 (Suou)

「Get in. We reach our destination in twenty minutes.」 (Suou)

Following Suou's invitation, I looked through the train window before boarding. I sat right next to the driver's seat, crowding into her personal space. Suou glared at me, her brow furrowed in annoyance.

「Why are you sitting here instead of the passenger cabin?」 (Suou)

「Just a whim. Or would you prefer I be polite and say I want to keep a close eye on you?」 (Subaru)

「In your case, it would be more "honest" to say you're here to make sure I don't stab you in the back.」 (Suou)

「Good grief, is your opinion of me really that low?」 (Subaru)

「It's only natural. You're a man with far more faces than I have.」 (Suou)

「I'll take that as a compliment.」 (Subaru)

「...Seriously, you never stop talking.」 (Suou)

「That's part of my charm──」 (Subaru) 「Be quiet now.」 (Suou).

After the scolding, I offered a soft 「Yes, ma'am,」 like someone trying to appease a temperamental cat. The train lurched into motion, the first vibrations rattling my seat. This private train, chartered for Subaru as its sole passenger, began its journey while the other teams followed its trail.

Sitting here wasn't bad at all; in fact, it was quite comfortable. The view from the front of a train is a rare experience, a once-in-a-lifetime sight. I decided to enjoy it as much as I could.

「...」

「...Subaru Natsuki.」 (Suou)

「Yes?」 (Subaru)

「To be honest, I'm interested in you. As a human being, you're highly suspicious... but what truly intrigues me is your "underlying principle."」 (Suou)

「Highly suspicious? I can't argue with that.」 (Subaru)

「I want to ask: Why do you go to such lengths for Abydos? Most people cannot act without a motive. They cannot succeed or persist without a logical justification.」 (Suou)

「The string of miracles you perform... it seems to me you create them without any of those foundations. It's deeply mysterious.」 (Suou)

That question again. I was about to give my standard answer: 「I did it because I wanted to」... but halfway through, the words caught in my throat. I felt this situation demanded a deeper, truer reason.

「It's not as grand as you imagine. My answer might even disappoint you, but if you're willing to hear it...」 (Subaru)

「It's fine. Consider it just some small talk to kill the boredom until we arrive.」 (Suou)

「...Then let's call it a casual chat.」 (Subaru)

「──It's because I don't want to lose anything anymore.」 (Subaru)

「...Hmm?」 (Suou)

I refuse to lose anything. If anyone asked Subaru for the primary engine behind his actions, this desire to preserve what he holds would be the first thing to come to mind.

He had finally settled those lingering feelings that had long tormented him. Whether the outcome matched his hopes or not, he chose to find joy simply because things were changing.

「I don't want to lose a single thing—not what I've gathered myself, nor what I've always owned. Everything, without exception.」 (Subaru)

「...」

「For instance—and I know it sounds cliché—I would truly grieve the loss of a friendship, or my friends, or my favorite shops, or movies and shows. Everything I hold dear.」 (Subaru)

「And it isn't just that. When you lose something, the loss isn't confined to the other person... It's hard to put into words, but I feel like 'something' inside me vanishes with every loss.」 (Subaru)

「──I once lost that 'something' inside me entirely. Even though people looked after me, treated me kindly, and supported me, the void left by that missing piece of my soul has never been filled.」 (Subaru)

「Back then, everything looked hollow. I felt like every tragedy was my fault; I even imagined that the world existed only to sharpen my agony. I drowned in absolute nihilism and couldn't find my way out.」 (Subaru)

「...That's it, in short. Because I 'never want to return to that state,' I refuse to lose anything again. Did that 'selfish' answer from Subaru Natsuki meet your expectations?」 (Subaru)

「...」

「It's an acceptable answer, though it would earn a zero by the standards of miracle-working heroes.」 (Suou)

「Right, right.」 (Subaru)

──For a moment, her iron-mask expression seemed to soften. But when he looked again, nothing had changed. Subaru continued the ride with a scattered mind, far from the tranquility he needed. After ten minutes, the destination came into view, and the train stopped at the nearest station.

「Get out.」 (Suou)

From here, he only had to walk straight.

「Follow me.」 (Suou)

Subaru followed, giving a simple nod to the robot managing the station. They left and headed toward the building. Everything seemed to be going perfectly. While Subaru smiled inwardly at his perceived victory, Suou continued to lead him, seemingly unaware of his thoughts.

「...──Go on, then.」 (Suou)

「Oh... I didn't expect you to push me forward like that.」 (Subaru)

They reached the entrance. This was where they parted ways. Though she had been a bitter rival in past lives that ended in death, she knew nothing of that history. She patted his shoulder lightly, and the gesture allowed seeds of trust to sprout. Subaru wanted to thank her.

「...」

His throat seized—not from thirst, but from a sudden wave of unease. Despite his scattered thoughts, this specific confusion made him realize the hidden contradiction──.

「...──」

「「It's far too quiet here.」」 (Suou and Subaru simultaneously)

「──」

「Yeah, you're right. Isn't this silence suspicious?」 (Subaru)

A cold shiver ran through his veins. It was indeed far too quiet. Except for the desert wind, all sounds had vanished from the world. Receptionist robots stood motionless behind glass, powered down. Nothing made a sound. To Subaru, who had spent half a year in the "Return by Death" loop, this silence was a blaring siren.

「What's wrong? Where did that confident expression go?」 (Suou)

「I... Ah, sorry. You encouraged me despite everything, and I...」 (Subaru)

「Or was my encouragement alone not enough?」 (Suou)

「──Huh?」 (Subaru)

「Why don't you listen to the voices of the companions you brought with you, then?」 (Suou)

「──!!!」

Panic surged through him, making him want to scream until his throat tore. He stumbled back as his mind retreated into the past, searching for a way to escape death. A vague, steady horror crawled toward him from the shadows.

I feel profoundly nauseous. A sharp ringing pierces my ears. My heart pounds so violently it feels as if it might burst through my ribs. My hand, clutching the phone where Arona resides, trembles with a sense of helpless weakness.

「Use that sharp tongue of yours, Subaru Natsuki.」 (Suou)

「But, ah, yes... I should also tell you that I feel euphoric right now.」 (Suou)

「I wanted to defeat Takanashi Hoshino; I wanted to win against her, to deny her existence and negate Abydos entirely.」 (Suou)

「But now... I don't know why.」 (Suou)

「──I want to deny you, and shatter everything you represent.」 (Suou)

──No, not like this. I never wanted this to happen. Everything was supposed to go smoothly. Things should have turned for the better. Maybe it was just bad luck. Or perhaps the timing was wrong. If I put in the effort, it will surely happen. As long as the mission is clear, I must not hesitate.

──Where did I go wrong?

「Deny... me?」 (Subaru)

「Yes.」 (Suou)

「Just as you said, I went too far in discarding too many things as unnecessary.」 (Suou)

「Nothing remains inside me; only pure nothingness dwells within me now.」 (Suou)

Oh, damn it. The silence—it's absolute and unsettling. I sense no trace of human life, no presence here. This place, where the so-called "Advisory Committee" is meant to meet, is far too quiet.

「You mentioned you experienced a similar state before, didn't you?」 (Suou)

「──」 (Subaru)

「Tell me, how are you now? Are we not two humans carrying the same void in our chests? How do you still have "things you fear losing"? How did you reclaim that "feeling" you once lost?」 (Suou)

「I... ah, that, it...」 (Subaru)

「──It's Abydos; I believe Abydos itself is the reason.」 (Suou)

「The existence of an Abydos longing for salvation is what moves you and fills your spiritual void.」 (Suou)

「In the end, I didn't want to deny Abydos for its own sake. I simply wanted to put an end to the hollow, meaningless feelings of revenge churning inside me.」 (Suou)

「Show me what you've got, Subaru Natsuki! I will continue to deny your existence and shatter everything you own until you taste that nothingness once again.」 (Suou)

「And then, I want to see you struggle to rise from the bottom one more time.」 (Suou)

●○●○●

Absolute silence.

「...」

I know exactly what I must do. I just need to save Nonomi. If she's in trouble, Subaru's job is to pull her out. I've always done it. I'll do it this time, too. Then everything will be fine.

「──」

Absolute silence.

「...──」

My breath hitches. My lungs ache, and my exhausted body groans under the strain. Screams of pain echo from every unhealed wound. ──Even so, I can never stop.

By executing this operation, I would finally save Nonomi and free "Abydos" from its long-standing, bitter suffering.

「Ooh...」 (Subaru)

A weak, infant-like whimper escaped my lungs, which had held their breath for far too long. The sound found no one to listen in this desolate place.

「W-what... what am I seeing?」 (Subaru)

The corpses of Kaiser soldiers and the wreckage of mechs lay scattered across the corridor, forming a grim barricade that blocked the path. My breath quickened, though not from physical exhaustion, and my heart began to hammer violently against my ribs again. Driven by instinct, I rushed toward the door where the meeting was supposed to take place.

A dark premonition surged through me, forcing me to throw the door open. It wasn't even locked. I burst inside, and it was over──.

「... Ah.」 (Subaru)

「Y... You...」 (Subaru)

「Nonomi... is it really you?」 (Subaru)

The room looked like the aftermath of a massive explosion; total destruction reigned. My mind struggled to process the horror unfolding before me. That cold dread crawling through my body finally manifested as reality. Hoshino and the others had not answered my calls—something had happened to everyone. In the center of the chaos, Nonomi sat motionless on the only remaining chair. Her presence—her halo—had vanished entirely. In Eridu, that meant only one thing: the end of life or the extinguishing of the soul. She stared into nothingness, a hollow vessel without a core.

──This couldn't be real. Had an actual explosion occurred, that chair would not have remained intact in the center of the room. Nonomi wouldn't look like this... so tidy and clean, as if death hadn't even touched her.

「Damn it...!」 (Subaru)

The moment that terrifying possibility crossed my mind, I retched violently. Yellow bile, mixed with the remains of the ramen from Shiba Taisho, spilled onto the floor. The foul stench spread as the pool of vomit widened.

「Ugh...」 (Subaru)

A sharp pain suddenly tore through my skull. I instinctively reached for my forehead, only for a sickening stickiness to coat my skin. The shock must have sent me crashing to the floor without me realizing it. Blood began to mask my face. I told myself I had to stop the bleeding and forced my head up, trying to keep my grip on reality.

「Gasp──」 (Subaru)

My eyes met Nonomi's empty ones—eyes that no longer reflected light or life. I vomited again. There, before me, lay a corpse like a wax doll robbed of its spirit. Despite all the horrors and deaths I had witnessed before, despair continued to pour from the depths of my heart, dragging me toward the abyss of nothingness.

I kept retching, as if trying to wash my empty stomach with pure despair. I had wasted time on useless detours and futile efforts; this was the inevitable result of failure. Everything I had done was for nothing. I had never reached the peace I thought I earned. It was all a farce. Everything here was a void, including Nonomi and me.

In an instant, those happy memories were stained by my fragile, shattered emotions. Nonomi's body slid from the chair, her weight collapsing onto Subaru.

「Ooh...」 (Subaru)

「Ah...」 (Subaru)

「── Ah...」 (Subaru)

「AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!」 (Subaru)

Despair finally caught Subaru Natsuki, surrounding him just as he thought he had escaped. He broke into loud, echoing wails. With all communications cut, the world around him turned blood-red with his screams. In the heart of that broken world which had taken the wrong path──Subaru Natsuki collapsed.

「W... Why?」 (Subaru)

「What... why did this happen?」 (Subaru)

『And then, I want to see you struggle to rise from the bottom one more time.』 (Suou)

「Why...」 (Subaru)

In a faint, broken voice, he continued his bitter weeping.

°

°

👑 Get early access to 20 advanced chapters on Patreon!

🔗 https://www.pat-reon.co-m/c/Raven737

(Just remove the hyphen (-) to open the link!)

💬 Enjoying the story? Drop a review!Your support really helps the series grow—thank you!

More Chapters