The tavern smells like old fish, spilled anise, and regret that's had time to mature.
I'm staring into a tiny glass of anis like it personally caused my headache. Haven't even drunk it yet. Just… judging it. Letting it know I'm disappointed.
The Dwarf is on the bench beside me, sweating through his beard, elbows wide, mug clenched like it owes him money. He nods along to nothing in particular. Professional listener.
"I don't get it," I say, finally. "I have a genuine princess. Certified. Barefoot. Trauma included. And no one wants to pony up the coin."
The anis stares back at me. Mocking. Milky. Suspicious.
"Furthrum was rude," I continue. "Didn't even counteroffer. Just—poof—'keep her.' Like she's a bad dress."
The Dwarf nods. Slow. Understanding nod. The kind that says yes, the world is stupid.
"Lerida sent mercenaries," I add. "Not to rescue her. No. To chase us away. Apparently we're 'disrupting trade corridors.'"
He grunts. Drinks.
"And Iolika," I say, pinching the bridge of my nose, "said Tanagra owes them money. As if that's her fault. As if she personally signed the ledger."
The Dwarf nods again. Wipes his brow. Sweats harder.
"Do you know how insulting it is," I go on, "to run a kidnapping and get treated like a debt collector?"
He lets out a sympathetic "hrrm."
I finally knock back the anis. Immediate regret. My head throbs like it's trying to leave my skull without me.
"I mean," I say, voice lower now, "I've ransomed goats. I've ransomed statues. Once I ransomed a man's reputation and got paid in olives. But a princess?"
I gesture vaguely. "Nothing."
The Dwarf nods. Again. Consistent. Reliable.
"Maybe," he offers slowly, "they think she's cursed."
I pause.
"…She is cursed," I say.
"Ah," he says, relieved. "That explains it."
I groan and thunk my forehead lightly against the table.
"I am wasting a perfectly good hostage," I mutter.
The Dwarf raises his mug in solemn agreement.
Outside, waves slap the quay. Somewhere down the coast, Loma is probably asking if shoes count as ransom expenses.
I order another anis.
"Next time," I say darkly, "I'm kidnapping someone with liquid assets and emotional value."
The Dwarf nods.
Wise man.