"No matter how well you perform, you might still lose out to some master's graduate who parachutes in, or a department manager who jumps ship from another hotel… not to mention all the relatives of the board members."Sophie lifted her head and bravely met Ned's gaze. "Rather than waiting so long with no guarantee of recognition, working so hard and going through all those roundabout rotations… it's better to keep things simple and find a restaurant job. If I work hard, I should be able to become a store manager fairly quickly—"
Her self-deceiving words were so convincing that even she was almost starting to believe them. "That way, success comes faster and easier, and I won't have to suffer so much or go through all those complicated rotations. A restaurant only has a limited number of positions, right? Managing it isn't that complex — it's much easier to get the hang of. That's my goal and expectation in life right now!!"
Ned offered no comment, showed no expression. He simply watched her guarded eyes with calm intensity.
"I understand your mindset very well," Sophie continued. "You think I left C&C because of our breakup, right? But the breakup was initiated by you, so you feel like you owe me something."
"You could say that." He looked at her and spoke words that cut deep: "If there's any way I can make it up to you, just name it. Whether it's a job, money, or anything else—I can give you whatever you want!"
"Even though you were the one who brought up the breakup back then, since it's already happened and become reality, it means I've accepted it!" Sophie's heart clenched painfully. She knew very clearly what stance she should take toward Ned, yet the intense love inside her still surged relentlessly—she couldn't possibly become indifferent to him so quickly.
She forced herself to smile at Ned. "Since we've already broken up, you don't need to feel indebted to me and worry about me so much. You also don't need to use your connections to find me a job out of pride—I don't need it now! As for money… back then your mother used money to entice me into leaving you. Now you want to use money to buy up the last bit of beauty left between us?"
He stared at her, his expression unreadable.
"I'm someone with very strong self-respect. I don't like hearing the word 'breakup' over and over." Sophie looked at him and went on: "A while ago, thank you for helping me arrange my mother's funeral. Though I suppose that was probably her wish as well…" Her voice grew smaller and smaller, until the last sentence was almost a choked sob in her throat. She was afraid Ned would hear it and ask why.
"From now on, I hope we never see each other again. Since we're not suitable for each other, I should face reality. I'm going to start living my own life. It won't be long before I might meet someone new and have a boyfriend. So whether it's a job, money, or any other kind of compensation—I don't want any of it. I just want us to have no further contact whatsoever!"
Sophie paused, then lifted her head with effort and looked straight at Ned. "So, we don't even need to see each other anymore. If we happen to run into each other on the street, it's best if we pretend we don't know each other. That's what I hope for."
Even after Sophie finished speaking, Ned's expression barely changed.
"You're serious?" After a long moment, he finally asked to confirm.
"Of course. Did you think I was joking?" She actually let out a laugh.
"Break up, and we can't even be friends anymore?" he asked, looking at her.
"That's right. I don't want an ambiguous 'just friends' situation. It's that simple." Her answer was firm.
He quietly studied Sophie. "Fine. As you wish," he replied calmly.
"Thank you!" Sophie said with a smile, then gathered all her strength, turned around, and strode away…
The words had been said.
All those lines she'd spoken while pretending to be strong were actually just protective scripts for herself.
That was it then. It was over. They wouldn't even see each other again…
Only this way could she continue living properly in the future—by forcing herself to completely give up hope, by letting the old version of herself die, so that the current her could be a brand-new, empty-handed Sophie Davies starting over.
............
"Miss, Miss," Sophie felt someone tug lightly at the hem of her shirt. "Where am I right now? A hospital? What exactly happened? Can you give me a rough idea?"
Sophie, who had been standing frozen in place lost in thought, was jolted back by Ned's cool, detached voice. Her unfocused eyes gradually sharpened. Looking at the man in front of her—his head wrapped in medical gauze, dressed in a hospital gown—she answered briefly: "Your sports car collided with my car on the highway. There was a car accident. We were both brought to the hospital."
"So this is a hospital. Does that mean I have amnesia? Do we know each other?"
"The doctor said that due to the severe trauma from the accident, crash victims can experience temporary memory loss. It's normal," Sophie replied, choosing which question to answer.
"Did the doctor say when my condition will improve?"
"It could be one day, two days, maybe the very next moment—or it's possible the patient may never recover their memories for the rest of their life." Sophie repeated the doctor's words exactly.
A lifetime. It was possible Ned might never remember her for the rest of his life.
Sophie didn't know how to face this version of Ned who had suddenly lost his memories. At noon she had called back to London to tell Uncle Jonathan about the accident, but no one picked up—not even the housekeeper. She tried twice and got no answer. When she called Uncle Jonathan's mobile, it said "phone turned off."
It was finally ten days later when they moved into the new house.
During this time, Sophie had been unable to reach Jonathan in person—his phone remained off the entire time. Yesterday someone finally answered the landline; it was the butler at the villa. Only then did Sophie tell him about Ned's car accident and ask him to send someone to pick Ned up and bring him back to London.
When she asked why she hadn't been able to contact Uncle Jonathan at all, the butler kept hemming and hawing, which made her feel very uneasy. She had originally planned that if she still couldn't reach anyone, she would call her uncle Matthew to notify him. But the butler repeatedly assured her that he would immediately arrange for someone to fly to the United States to bring the young master back to London, so she gave up on the idea.
While waiting, she could only first bring Ned—who was now well enough to be discharged—home with her.
"This is a predominantly Black neighborhood. Don't go out alone at night, or it might be dangerous," Sophie warned Ned.
"About when do you plan to start attending school?" he asked. While in the hospital, Sophie had mentioned to him that she had moved to Oklahoma to study.
"It'll still be a while. Once the house is sorted out, I need to find a job first. Otherwise, my money's going to run out," she replied.
"You're going to work and study at the same time? Won't that be very hard?" Ned frowned.
"Of course, I've always been like this. What's so hard about it? Being self-sufficient!"
Ned laughed. Over these past few days, the smiles on his face had grown brighter and brighter. Sophie felt as though she had seen more of his smiles in this short time than in all the years since they first met.
After losing his memories, he seemed to have turned into an angel who loved to smile.
"What are you grinning about like an idiot?" Sophie asked.
"Because you make me feel like something's strange."
"Strange? What's strange about me?"
"It's just that you're obviously very poor and can barely support yourself, yet you still go out of your way to take in a stranger and let me stay at your place. Don't you think a girl like you is pretty strange?" Ned's words came out naturally, and his reasoning sounded perfectly reasonable.
Sophie looked at him for a long time. A wave of bitterness surged in her heart.
Because you're Ned.
"Why are you staring at me like that?" Ned winked at her.
"You really, really…" She paused, then continued, "You really don't remember anything from before? Not even a little?"
"Why are you asking that?" Ned countered with a question.
"Because the way you talk doesn't sound like someone who's sick at all."