The First Chase
Time Dilation: 1 Earth minute = 4 hours in Heavenly Jade (nothing personal just some fast forwarding)
The bamboo forest didn't run; it sprinted.
Stalks taller than skyscrapers whipped past in emerald blurs, their leaves razor-edged and humming with residual qi from the night's spirit tides. Mist clung to everything like a jealous lover—thick, fragrant with crushed lotus and ozone, and glowing faintly where sunlight pierced the canopy. Every footfall echoed threefold: once on damp earth, once in the spirit veins beneath, and once in the narrative code that now pulsed through Keller's veins like liquid plot armor.
His lungs were twin furnaces. His hoodie—once a proud relic of a Brooklyn winter—hung in tatters, soaked from New York rain that had followed him through the portal like a clingy ex. Each breath tasted of crushed bamboo sap and raw power. His sneakers, never meant for cultivation-world parkour, squeaked traitorously against slick roots.
"Hey! Keep up, random civilian!" Lian Yuqi's voice sliced through the chaos like a thrown dagger—playful, lethal, alive. She vaulted onto a branch mid-stride, crimson robes flaring like battle flags. The stolen Heavenly Chime dangled from her fingers, its bronze surface etched with runes that sang in frequencies only immortals were supposed to hear. Every jingle was a taunt, a middle finger to the heavens, a promise that today would not be boring.
Keller stumbled after her, arms windmilling as a falling stalk nearly decapitated him. "I—huff—didn't sign a waiver for this marathon of death!"
Alex: "Waivers are for mortals who stay in their lane. You're a narrative glitch. Dodge, run, and try not to embarrass me in front of the local protagonist. She's grading you."
Keller groaned, ducking under a qi-charged vine that snapped like a whip. "Yeah, because dodging exploding bamboo in a world I don't understand is my usual Friday night activity. Back home, my biggest threat was spilling ramen on my keyboard."
Yuqi glanced back mid-flip, golden eyes flashing with delight. "You talk too much. Noted. Also—" she landed cat-light on a floating root, spun, and pointed at him with the bell "—funny that you're still standing. Most outsiders melt into narrative consequences before breakfast. You're either lucky, cursed, or interesting."
Before Keller could decide which terrified him more, the bamboo exploded.
Six purple-robed cultivators erupted from the foliage in perfect formation—swords drawn, qi flaring in synchronized lotus patterns. Their leader, a scarred elder with a beard like frozen lightning, roared with the gravitas of a thousand offended ancestors:
"LIAN YUQI! RETURN THE HEAVENLY CHIME OR FACE OBLIVION IN THE NAME OF THE JADE ORACLE SECT!"
Keller's stomach dropped through his shoes. His first instinct? Trip over his own feet. His second? Activate.
Alex: "Initiating Plot Defense Protocol. Prepare to feel ridiculous—and unstoppable."
A dome of violet data erupted from Keller's outstretched palms, hexagonal panels interlocking with the precision of a master array. It shimmered like liquid amethyst, edges crackling with absorbed qi. The cultivators' swords slammed into it—CLANG-CLANG-CLANG!—sparks erupting in cascades that lit the mist like forbidden fireworks. One disciple yelped as his blade rebounded, qi backlash singeing his eyebrows into sad little curls.
Keller blinked at his glowing hands. "Wait… that worked? I didn't even know the hotkey!"
Alex: "Congratulations. Ability unlocked: [Narrative Bastion]. Current level: Noob. Function: 'Make43 Everyone Regret Swinging Swords at You.' Upgrade path: Embarrassment → Legend."
He rubbed his hands together, grin splitting his face like a cracked eggshell. "Finally… my golden finger is flexing! Take that, physics!"
Yuqi's laughter rang out—bright, sharp, addictive. Without warning, she flipped through the air and landed piggy-back on Keller's shoulders, light as a promise and twice as dangerous.
"Good boy," she purred, patting his head like he was a particularly clever spirit beast. "I like someone who can survive my chaos. You're officially part of my team… whether you like it or not. Name?"
"K-Keller! And team? I didn't agree to—"
"Too late!" She kicked his ribs—not hard, but enough to launch them both sideways as a qi blast vaporized the spot where they'd stood. Bamboo became shrapnel. The dome held. They rolled, tumbled, and came up running.
Alex: "Kidnapping by protagonist: Confirmed. Chemistry levels: Rising. Do try to keep your heart rate under 180, or I'll assume you're flirting."
Keller's face burned hotter than the qi explosions behind them. "Shut up, Alex!"
Yuqi glanced down from her perch on his shoulders, hair whipping in the wind like a war banner. "You talk to invisible friends too? Cute. I do that when I'm bored. Mine usually scream."
Mid-Morning — The First Absorption
They burst into a clearing where the bamboo thinned into a meadow of glowing spirit grass. Each blade hummed a different note, forming a natural symphony that made Keller's skin tingle. In the center stood a cracked stone obelisk—ancient, pulsing with faded runes. A spirit vein intersection. A narrative node.
Alex: "Jackpot. Minor plot anchor detected. Absorb it, and you'll unlock your first passive. Warning: Cultivators inbound. Time dilation active—30 seconds Earth-side, 2 hours here. Use it."
Keller skidded to a halt, Yuqi sliding off his back with acrobatic grace. "What's the plan, Plot Boy?"
He stared at the obelisk, violet light reflecting in his eyes. "I… steal the story?"
"Finally," Yuqi grinned, cracking her knuckles. "I was worried you'd be boring."
The cultivators crashed through the treeline—twelve now, reinforced by a golden-core enforcer whose aura pressed down like a collapsing star. The air thickened, gravity doubling. Keller's knees buckled.
Yuqi stepped forward, bell raised. "Hey, Uncle Thunderbeard! Still mad about your relic?"
The enforcer's eyes narrowed. "Lian Yuqi. Surrender the boy. His anomaly offends the Heavenly Dao."
She stuck out her tongue. "Make me."
Keller's hands moved on instinct. The [Narrative Bastion] expanded—not just a shield, but a vacuum. Runes on the obelisk flickered, drawn toward him like iron to a magnet. The enforcer roared, unleashing a palm strike that compressed the air into a glowing lotus.
Alex: "Absorption window: 3… 2… 1…"
Keller pulled.
The lotus strike slammed into the bastion—and dissolved. Qi unraveled into threads of light, spiraling into Keller's chest. The obelisk cracked, runes peeling off like burning paper. Power flooded him—warm, electric, narrative.
Skill Acquired: [Plot Siphon] (Lv.1)
Passive: Absorb 5% of incoming technique energy. Convert to system EXP.
Active: Steal one minor plot element per day (cooldown: 24 hours).
The enforcer staggered, palm trembling. "Impossible… my Lotus Annihilation Palm… devoured?"
Yuqi whistled. "Okay, Plot Boy. You just ate a golden-core technique for breakfast. I'm impressed."
Keller flexed his fingers, violet sparks dancing. "I feel… hungry."
Alex: "Warning: Arrogance detected. Enemy reinforcement ETA: 4 minutes. Suggest retreat with style."
Yuqi grabbed his hand—her grip warm, calloused, real. "Run now, flirt later!"
They bolted.
Afternoon — Training Montage From Hell
Time dilation: 1 Earth minute = 6 hours
The forest became their battlefield, their dojo, their playground.
Keller learned fast—too fast. Every dodged strike, every absorbed blast, every sarcastic quip from Alex fed the system. His hoodie was shredded to ribbons, revealing a physique that shouldn't exist after years of instant noodles and late-night grinding. Muscles etched themselves into existence like an author retconning a weak protagonist.
Skill Upgraded: [Narrative Bastion] → [Story Citadel] (Lv.3)
Now reflects 15% of absorbed damage as narrative backlash. Visual effect: Enemies see their worst fears.
Yuqi taught him footwork—Crimson Phantom Steps, a movement art stolen from a sect library. Keller's version glitched, leaving violet afterimages that whispered plot spoilers to pursuers.
"Your ancestor was a side character?" one disciple wailed as his reflection showed him dying forgotten in chapter 12.
By noon (local time), they'd cleared three spirit groves, rerouted a river with redirected qi blasts, and left a trail of traumatized cultivators. Keller's laughter echoed—wild, free, terrifying.
Yuqi watched him absorb a firebird's plume, flames coiling into his palm like obedient code. "You're not human," she said, not accusing—just curious.
"Nope," Keller grinned, tossing the flame like a baseball. "I'm a bug in the story. And bugs bite."
She stepped closer, bell jingling softly. "I like bugs."
Alex: "Heart rate: 192. Flirtation detected. Suggest combat to diffuse sexual tension."
"SHUT UP, ALEX!"
Late Afternoon — The First Kiss (Almost)
They found refuge in a hollow spirit bamboo—massive, glowing, its interior a cathedral of pulsing green light. Outside, search parties combed the forest. Inside, time slowed to a crawl.
1 Earth minute = 8 hours.
Yuqi leaned against the curved wall, bell resting in her lap. "You know… most people break when the world tries to kill them. You just… laugh."
Keller sat across from her, shirtless now—his hoodie a lost cause. Violet runes crawled across his skin like living tattoos, fading in and out. "Back home, I read about people like you. Chaos incarnate. Plot armor thicker than a harem protagonist's skull. Figured if I ever met one… I'd either die or—"
"Or?" She tilted her head, hair spilling like ink.
He swallowed. "Or I'd want to keep up."
Silence stretched, thick with qi and something else. Yuqi crawled forward on hands and knees, bell dragging behind her like a wedding train. She stopped inches away, gold eyes searching his.
"You're shaking," she whispered.
"Adrenaline," he lied.
"Liar." She tapped his chest, right over the glowing system core. "This thing in you… it's hungry. Like me."
Keller's hand moved without permission, brushing a strand of hair from her face. Her skin was warm, scarred, real. "Yuqi… I don't even know your favorite color."
"Red," she said. "Like blood. Like revolution. Like the robes I stole because they looked better on me."
He laughed—soft, broken, human. "Mine's purple. Like glitches. Like the color of stories breaking."
Their faces were close now. Breath mingling. The bell jingled once—ding—like a starting pistol.
Alex: "Warning: Romantic subplot detected. Probability of interruption: 99%. Suggest—"
The bamboo exploded.
A golden-core enforcer—the enforcer from earlier—burst through the wall, sword blazing with sect-ending fury. "FOUND YOU!"
Yuqi sighed. "Rude."
Keller stood, [Story Citadel] flaring to life. "Round two?"
She grinned, bell raised. "Make it spectacular."
Evening — Villain Cutaway (Expanded)
Location: The Void Citadel, Beyond the 33rd Heaven
The citadel floated in a sea of erased stories—pages drifting like ash, worlds reduced to footnotes. Its spires were carved from the bones of dead narratives, runes pulsing with the screams of deleted protagonists.
At its heart, The Editor sat on a throne of red pens. Their face was a shifting mosaic—every author who'd ever abandoned a draft, every reader who'd dropped a series. Eyes like black holes stared into a scrying pool showing Keller and Yuqi mid-battle.
"Interesting," The Editor murmured, voice layered with a thousand accents. "A human anomaly… bonded to a rogue system. And the girl—Lian Yuqi—her plot immunity is fracturing. Delicious."
A subordinate—face obscured by a mask of burning manuscripts—knelt. "Master, the boy's absorption rate exceeds projections. At this pace, he'll reach Final Boss threshold in 47 worlds."
The Editor tapped a finger. Each tap erased a minor character somewhere. "Let him. Let him believe. Arrogance is the sharpest blade I wield."
Lightning crackled along the citadel's spires, syncing with the storm over Heavenly Jade. "When he stands atop his stolen plots, thinking himself the author… I will rewrite him into a footnote."
The scrying pool zoomed in on Keller—laughing as he absorbed a sect-ending technique, Yuqi at his side, bell singing.
The Editor smiled with too many teeth.
"Enjoy your prologue, Keller Williams. The real story begins when you break."
Night — Calm Before the Next Storm
Time dilation: 1 Earth minute = 12 hours
The waterfall spilled upward—a silver ribbon defying gravity, vanishing into clouds that birthed new rivers. Keller and Yuqi sat on a floating stone slab, legs dangling over the edge. The forest below was a battlefield of glowing scars—craters, severed bamboo, the faint screams of retreating cultivators.
Yuqi leaned back on her hands, bell resting between them like a sleeping dragon. "You know… I've stolen a hundred relics. Started a dozen sect wars. But today?" She nudged his shoulder. "Today was fun."
Keller smirked, wiping blood from a cut on his cheek. The wound closed under violet light. "Fun? I nearly became tiger chow. Twice."
"Exactly." She turned to him, eyes soft for once. "You didn't run. You fought. With me."
Silence. The kind that hums with possibility.
He reached out, hesitant. She didn't pull away. Their fingers brushed—hers calloused from sword grips, his tingling with system energy. The contact sparked—literal sparks, violet and gold.
Alex: "Synchronization detected. Plot bond forming. Warning: This is how tragic backstories start."
Yuqi rolled her eyes. "Your invisible friend is a buzzkill."
"She grows on you. Like mold. Sentient, sarcastic mold."
Yuqi laughed—really laughed, head thrown back, bell jingling in harmony. When she looked at him again, something shifted. The chaos gremlin receded. Just a girl. Just a boy. Just a moment stolen from the jaws of fate.
She leaned in.
He leaned in.
The bell jingled—ding—soft, almost shy.
Alex: "Incoming plot twist in 3… 2…"
The sky cracked.
A rift tore open above the waterfall—black as deletion, edges bleeding ink. From it fell a single page, fluttering like a dying bird. It landed between them, face-up.
Title in burning silver: REAL World
Keller's blood froze. The page showed a sketch—him, passed out in the comic shop, Vanessa shaking him, Jake and Dion screaming his name. The caption: "And Keller Williams vanished, never to be seen again."
Yuqi's hand tightened on his. "That's… your world?"
He couldn't speak. The page pulsed, trying to pull—like the story wanted to drag him back, erase this timeline, rewrite him as a cautionary tale.
Alex: "Opposition move detected. They're trying to delete your origin. Countermeasure: Absorb or sever."
Keller stared at the page. At Yuqi's hand in his. At the bell glowing between them.
He stood.
"No."
The [Story Citadel] flared—massive now, a cathedral of violet light. He grabbed the page. It burned his fingers, but he pulled. Ink bled into his palm, words unraveling into code.
Absorption Complete: [Origin Anchor] (Lv.1)
Passive: Your home world cannot be deleted without your consent.
Active: Return home once per arc (cooldown: 7 worlds).
The rift snapped shut. The page dissolved into stardust.
Yuqi watched him, eyes wide. "You just… ate your own deletion."
Keller exhaled, shaky but whole. "Yeah. And I'm not done."
She stood beside him, bell raised like a toast. "Then let's steal the next chapter. Together."
He took her hand. The bell jingled—ding—like a promise.
Alex: "Bond solidified. Shippers inbound. Prepare for harem accusations in 3… 2…"
Keller squeezed Yuqi's hand. "Worth it."
Above them, constellations shifted—new stars forming the shape of a pen. Somewhere, an author screamed as their outline burned.
Keller grinned at the sky.
"Your move."