"This is insufferable," Robin states, his voice low and tight.
He lets out a long, frustrated sigh. His shoulders slump a fraction.
"Our current methods are ineffective."
He looks at Beast Boy, who is still half-trapped under the Snorlax.
"Beast Boy," Robin says, the name coming out like a reluctant order. "Your… expert animal insight. How do we deal with this?"
Pawniard shifts its weight, blades glinting. Expert animal insight? This is a new chain of command, a deviation from protocol. It processes the uncharacteristic request, its posture subtly adjusting to this new, unexpected direction.
Rockruff, sensing the sudden shift in the air, looks expectantly at Beast Boy.
Woof?
Cyborg, meanwhile, is already focused on a more logical solution. He extends his cybernetic arm. His forearm panel slides open with a hiss.
He pulls out his Pokédex.
Whirr.
The red device glows. A focused beam of light scans the colossal sleeping Pokémon.
[SCANNING COMPLETE. SPECIES: SNORLAX.]
[POKÉDEX ENTRY LOADING.]
Cyborg reads the entry aloud, his metallic voice tinged with exasperation.
"Snorlax. The Sleeping Pokémon. It weighs over a thousand pounds and is known for its immense appetite and deep sleep patterns."
"It is immune to most conventional waking methods."
"Only a specific, rare item known as the Poké Flute is known to stir it from its slumber."
Cyborg lets out a low groan.
"Great. So, we need a magic flute to wake the giant sleepyhead."
"Anybody got a magic flute in their utility belt?"
Beast Boy, now free from Snorlax's light grip, pushes himself up. He is thrilled by Robin's request. His green skin practically vibrates with excitement.
"A Poké Flute? Pfft! Who needs a flute when you've got… animal ingenuity!"
He snaps his fingers, his eyes wide.
"Okay, okay, I got it! Mega-tickle attack!"
Rockruff barks, wagging its tail furiously.
Woof! Woof!
"I turn into a thousand tiny ants, and we tickle Snorlax's nose until it sneezes us all the way to next Tuesday!"
Starfire, holding Togepi, claps her hands.
"Oh, Beast Boy, that is most creative!"
Togepi chirps, caught up in the enthusiasm.
Toge-pri!
"Or!" Beast Boy continues, pacing wildly. "Super-stinky plant bomb! I find the stinkiest plant in this whole Sanctuary, turn into a giant skunk, and… PFFFT! Snorlax won't know what hit him!"
Raven rolls her eyes. Of course.
"Then we all won't know what hit us," she mutters, adjusting Misdreavus on her shoulder. Misdreavus giggles, finding the idea amusing.
Heh heh heh.
"Or… the ultimate challenge!" Beast Boy declares. "I turn into a bigger Snorlax, and challenge him to a sleep-off! Winner takes all the berries!"
Cyborg, ignoring Beast Boy's antics, pulls up a holographic schematic on his wrist.
"Forget the stink bombs, BB. I'm thinking a Snorlax-lifting platform. We just… gently relocate him."
Robin pinches the bridge of his nose. This is not progress.
He takes a deep breath, trying to inject some order into Beast Boy's chaos.
"Alright, alright, enough. We combine elements."
He points at Starfire. "Starfire, gentle energy pulses. Try to create a berry scent trail. Maybe something sweet, irresistible."
Starfire nods, her green eyes glowing softly.
"I understand! An aroma of deliciousness!"
Togepi perks up, sensing deliciousness.
Togepi!
"Beast Boy," Robin continues, looking at the green hero. "You, as a strong animal. Try to physically nudge it. Not push, nudge. We want to wake it, not start a fight."
Beast Boy transforms into a green gorilla, thumping his chest.
"Got it, Robin! Gentle giant mode engaged!"
Rockruff barks, excited to see the gorilla.
Woof!
"Cyborg, a low-frequency sonic hum. Something designed to vibrate, not blast."
Cyborg nods.
"On it. Sub-sonic frequency, minimal impact."
"Raven," Robin says, looking at the empath. "Subtly project a dream. A comfortable, alternative sleeping spot. Far from here."
Raven sighs, but a faint, almost imperceptible smile touches her lips.
"Understood. Perhaps a meadow of eternal napping."
Misdreavus floats around her head, a soft, encouraging hum.
Pawniard watches the team. It is still bewildered by the "plan." This is… unconventional. But the objective remains clear. Its bladed arms stay ready, anticipating any complications.
Starfire raises her hands, fingers glowing faintly. A shimmer leaves her palms, forming a translucent, green current. The current drifts towards Snorlax's nose. It carries the sweet scent of fresh berries.
Togepi watches, utterly focused. It waves its tiny hands, mimicking Starfire. Toge-pri! A faint sugary aroma wafts through the air.
The Snorlax's nose twitches. A low grunt rumbles in its chest. It shifts its massive head, nestling deeper into the earth. It inhales, a slow, deep breath, pulling in the berry scent. It remains sound asleep.
Beast Boy, now a hulking rhinoceros, lowers his head. His green hide ripples with muscle. He charges forward, aiming for Snorlax's side. He intends to gently nudge the sleeping giant.
He slams into Snorlax.
THUD
The Snorlax barely stirs. It groans, a sound like shifting mountains. Its immense weight rolls over, casually pinning the rhino-Beast Boy beneath its furry flank.
"Ugh… little help… here!" Beast Boy's muffled shouts are barely audible.
Rockruff barks, agitated. It tries to dig at the edge of the Snorlax, concerned for its trainer.
Woof! Woof!
Cyborg sighs. His arm cannon extends, glowing softly. He calibrates the sonic emitter, aiming for a gentle, persuasive hum. He hopes to wake the Snorlax, not startle it.
A high-pitched hum fills the air. It is almost musical. The Snorlax snorts, a contented sound. Its snoring grows louder, deeper. Its sleep becomes even more peaceful.
A swarm of Combee appears, attracted by the humming. They buzz curiously around Cyborg's head. Whismur, perched on Cyborg's shoulder, lets out a soft whimper.
Whimper.
Raven closes her eyes. She projects a calming image into Snorlax's mind. A wide, open meadow. Soft grass. No Titans. She hopes for a new, empty sleeping spot.
The Snorlax murmurs happily. Its paw twitches, as if reaching for dream-berries. Misdreavus floats closer, peering into the Snorlax's mind. It giggles, a ghostly, tinkling sound. Dream-feast.
Robin takes charge. He barks orders, cutting through the confusion.
"Starfire, energy barrier! Contain the Combee!"
Starfire nods. A green force field expands, gently corralling the buzzing Pokémon.
"Cyborg, lower frequency! Gentle vibration, not a lullaby!"
Cyborg adjusts his arm cannon. The hum drops, becoming a deep thrum.
"Raven, keep up the dream-snack projection! Make it enticing!"
Robin moves to Snorlax's side. Pawniard flanks him, blades ready. Robin tries to pry Snorlax's immense body off Beast Boy. He pushes against the thick fur.
It does not budge.
Robin, seeing no other option, focuses his strength. He grabs Beast Boy's rhino-horn.
"Starfire, grab his legs!"
Starfire uses her super-strength. She pulls at Beast Boy's hindquarters. The Snorlax's immense weight makes it a hard task.
Groan.
Inch by agonizing inch, Beast Boy slides out from under the Snorlax. He scrambles away, morphing back into his green human form, covered in Snorlax fur and smelling faintly of stale berries. Rockruff licks his face.
Lick.
Suddenly, a flash of green and red darts from the nearby foliage. A long, sticky tongue shoots out. It flicks against the Snorlax's giant foot.
The Snorlax shivers. A deep, rumbling giggle starts in its chest. The Combee around Cyborg scatter as the Snorlax's body begins to shake.
It lets out a booming sneeze.
ACHOO!
The Snorlax blinks its small eyes. It yawns a wide, cavernous yawn. It stretches its arms above its head. Completely oblivious, it lumbers off the path and into the trees.
The Titans stand there. Beast Boy is still brushing fur off his purple outfit. Starfire has a leaf stuck in her radiant hair. Cyborg's scanner drips a bit of sticky residue from the Combee. Raven's cloak hangs slightly crooked. Robin smooths a defiant smudge of dirt from his cowl.
Rockruff barks happily at the now-clear path.
Woof!
They look at each other. A shared, silent acknowledgment passes between them. The path is clear.
***
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Advance chapters in P@T0n Najicablitz.