Everything around me froze. The air felt poisonous and too damp for me to breathe. I could not help but stare at the test sitting in one corner of the table like a death certificate.
So what I was trying to hide all this time... Was blood cancer?
I have finally started to get a fraction fo my life back and this is what I get at the end of the day?
No no no... Things were always going to go worse regardless. I should have anticipated this since things have been going bad since the day I had come back from the passport office of course.
Until now, I was thinking of how I was going to fulfil something from my long list of stupid things. Like trying out multi-flavoured ice creams, testing my hands in craft... Turning my life around for the better.
But I guess...
My mom was right all along.
A shudder ran along my spine as my breath caught at my throat. My lungs felt constricted to a point that inhailing was something to pay for with my sanity.
Sensing my shift, Avry moved a bit. Shoving my head away now that I was awake. I wasn't even hurt.
"So... How can we treat her?" She asked, folding her arms in front of her.
The physician paused, tapping his pen against his clipboard. "Well, she seems to have already digested her powers fast enough. So her blood can't be filtered out. But then, that would have to result in having to chop down her limps if she is alright with it...?"
Really? Chop my limbs?
No. I will not stay bedridden.
"What other options are there?" I asked, ignoring Avry. She was shocked that I had taken such a short time to recover from my own shock. Then she shook her head and looked away.
"We... Could give you surpressants to keep down the pain. But you will have to sacrifice an eyeball then," he replied. His expression grim.
"Hm? Alright then. That is it, I choose the surpressants." Losing an eye was better then not being able to move again. Ask anyone in the world, they would answer the same.
Being half-blind seems like an investment here.
Although...
"Are you sure?" He curved an eyebrow up. "The surpressants can sometimes lead to addiction. And it can kill you too if you take a little too much of it."
Ah! Then I know very well what the surpressants are.
"Still. I will take it," I answered while hoping down from the bed. My head gave a single loop, before settling down.
Before he could say anything, I reached out towards the side table right next to the device. A small bottle of pills.
"Candidate Fifteen—!" Avry shouted.
"Relax... I know what he means by 'surpressants'," I answered while popping the lid open. Without a thought, I took out two pills and tipped my head back. Tossing them into my mouth.
"These... Are opioids."
Not being sarcastic or anything... But I have some history with them back on Earth. In fact, the medicine that I brought with me to this world, was the same pills I took five seconds ago.
The bitterness immediately filled my mouth, and I winced a bit. But as I walked out of the infirmary, the sky was starting to get more and more clear.
I didn't know why... But as the breeze blew across my face, I felt like it has been ages since I had seen a sunny day this calm.
As I stepped out of the infirmary, the surrounding immediately engulfed me.
Sounds of birds happily chirping filled my ears, and the clouds soared by so gently but elegantly. I might as well have thought this was a simple daydream.
Without a word, I tossed the container into my pocket and walked back towards the cafeteria.
While doing so... I was also thinking about a lot of things.
Like how to change my life for the better.
Ain't no leukemia stopping me. I will beg at my feet if I have to, and I will turn my life around.
The universe is big. Sitting cramped into a small corner of a dark room, rotting in bed isn't going to help with anything because life just moved on whether you want it or not.
I swear on my life... That is just how it goes...
Life is a pattern. It will constantly throw problems at you, but that is only to prepare you for the next step.
I believe that whatever I am about to do next, will be something that brings me a huge reward at the end.
So... I won't give up.
***
"Thirty-two... Hah! Thirty-three..."
It is not that I am not strong though. We all know that first time is always the painful time.
... And my bones hurt alright?!
I held my body weight off the ground with my hands tightly grabbing the edge of my cabinet, as I slowly lifted my torso up higher.
"Thirty-four..."
My hair was tied back in a bun, my white shirt soaked through at the shoulders and my hoodie tied at my waist. This should do as a proper work-out outfit for now...
At the fifteenth, I let go and hoped down onto my toes. I won't be showing progress in one day. But that was enough for today.
Honestly, it felt quite good. Achieving a goal wasn't an easy task, but setting the first step was good.
And funnier fact... We don't have phones here for distraction...
Oh... Thinking about that...
"Am... I supposed to be writing letters now?" I once asked myself. (I am an addict... Embarrassingly.)
I walked into my bathroom to wash-up afterwards, then came back out to sit back at my table and start scratching onto paper with a pen. A ballpoint pen... That is.
I love how it is available here. And I will forever treasure it.
Though...
"Gel pens have a better design..." Don't mind my weird hobby.
*********************
First draft: 03.11.2025
Rewritten: 02.09.2026