But the moment I was about to step on that road, I felt someone's hand on my shoulder, and when I turned back, then it was none other than Ji Juan, who held me with both of his hands, placing them on my shoulders to make me steady so that I wouldn't fall on the ground. I immediately got a little uncomfortable. It's not because I doubted Ji Juan or didn't trust him, it's just because I didn't like it. I am only used to Yuan's touch, and someone else's touch only makes me a bit uncomfortable. But I said to him while trying to stand properly, "Ji Juan, I am fine. Let's move faster, otherwise we'll miss the bus. Come, come," I said to him while trying to take another step forward to reach the bus stand, but I failed.
Ji Juan said while holding my hand to help me walk, "Miss Zhao, you don't need to be in such a rush. If your dormitory really gets closed, then Shanghai is not without hotels, at least you know it better than me. You can stay at a hotel also. Don't harm yourself to reach somewhere where it's not requested or necessary."
His line was only about my pain right now, but it made me relate it to something else, and I said to him, "I know that rushing will only hurt myself, but at least I want to try. I really want to, no matter if I regret it or if I fail, but at least when some time passes and I look back at this day, I can proudly say that yes, I didn't get it, but at least I tried. I tried my best, I tried till my last breath, because winning or losing is not in our hands and we can't do anything about it. But if we don't fight for it or take a stand for what we want, then we'll only be left with regret for the rest of our life, always thinking what if I had fought for it that day, maybe, maybe I could have won. So, Mr Ji Juan, I really don't want such regrets in the rest of my life. I really don't want that thought in my life, that what if I had done this or that. I only want to say that yes, I did that. Now if I am not having it, then it's definitely not my fault," I said to him while smiling.
Ji Juan got stunned for a moment after listening to my deep thoughts and words, and said, "Miss Zhao, I think you are having an ankle twist now, isn't it?"
"Correct," I replied to him.
"But why does it seem like whatever you were talking about just now is not related to this? Why does it feel like it's related to something else or someone else?" he asked me suspiciously.
"Stop being so doubtful, Mr Ji Juan. I only meant this. What else could I mean other than this? There is nothing else for me," I said to him very confidently. But whom am I lying to, Ji Juan or myself? I know it pretty well. It's related to him, but I couldn't tell Ji Juan. I couldn't.
Then, by dragging myself with that twisted ankle, we finally reached the bus stand at the right time. Then I sat down on the bus stand seat and asked Ji Juan to sit, but he refused and said, "Miss Zhao, you have finally reached here, and your stubbornness wins."
I smiled like a shameless kid and said, "Since childhood, I was a very stubborn child. My whole family, including bàba, màma, and Xin Xin, said that I made them suffer so much during my childhood. I really can't tell you," I said while waiting for the bus to arrive.
Then suddenly Ji Juan said, "Wait here for a bit. I'll be right back."
"Why? Where are you going? Restroom?" I asked him shockingly.
He nodded his head and went immediately. After sitting there for the next five minutes, Ji Juan arrived with something in his hand that he was carrying. Then I said to him, "Is the restroom providing some kind of gifts when we go there?" I asked him.
He laughed and said, "Of course, if someone is willing to take it."
I smiled back at him. Then he sat beside me and took out an instant pain reliever spray from the bag and said, "Show me your foot."
I got a little hesitant and said, "Ji Juan, I am going to my dormitory. I'll take some medicine from there. You don't need to do all this."
"Show me," he said again.
Then I slightly showed him my foot where there was a sprain. He sprayed the spray over it. A little pain occurred at that moment, and in that instance, I mistakenly held his hand tightly, but I realized it immediately and said, "Sorry if I hurt you."
He smiled back at me and while putting the pain reliever spray back into the bag, said, "You know what, you are the first one who said sorry to someone else despite being in pain yourself."
I smiled back at him. Then he took out ice cream from that bag and gave it to me. I got a little surprised seeing it because it was my favorite flavor, but I didn't tell him about it. Then how did he know it? So I asked him, "Mr Ji Juan, how do you know that choco vanilla is my favorite flavor?"
He smiled and said, "Because in the restaurant, just a few hours ago, you ordered the cake in that flavor."
"But how are you so sure about that? I mean, maybe I like that flavor only in cakes, not in ice creams," I asked him.
"I just felt it. The way you ordered it, I had a sense that it might be your favorite flavor," he said while opening the lid of the ice cream cup and handing it to me.
"You observe quite nicely," I said while taking a bite.
He smiled again and said, "Since childhood, I was a very good observer. I observe things very quickly and quietly without saying anything. So you must be careful of me in the future, because if I am around, you can't even hide what you are feeling."
Then I asked, "Then tell me one thing, why did you bring ice cream? I mean, you could have brought cake, but why ice cream?"
He smiled again and said, "Because ice cream is a good mood booster and pain reliever, and you are having a sprain in your left ankle, so I thought it might work for you."
"This is a new theory I have heard for the first time in my life," I said while taking another spoonful of ice cream. But I must say, it really worked. My mood got a little uplifted. I didn't say it got completely better, but it worked a little.
He smiled again and said, "Working a little like this helps it heal properly."
"It has a deep meaning," I said to him.
He smiled and said, "As deep as your feelings are right now."
I panicked a little and asked, "What do you mean?"
"You think I didn't notice, but I did," he said.
"What did you notice?" I asked.
"Everything. The way your hands were shivering in the restaurant where the heater was already on, the way you ate the cake so fast, the way you ran just now on the road. I noticed everything," he said.
"How much do you know?" I asked.
"Didn't I say it earlier, Miss Zhao? I am a good observer. I know everything, you just didn't notice," he said.
"Then don't say further words. I know you know, but I don't want to hear it," I said while taking the last bite of my ice cream and standing up, dumping the empty cup in the dustbin.
"Be careful," he said.
Then when I came back after throwing the ice cream cup, at that exact moment, the bus arrived.
"Let's go. The bus is already here. Sometimes we need to take the path," I said.
"Of course, but sometimes you also need to express yourself more. Maybe you'll get something better," he said.
"I don't want better. If it's worse, then I want that worse for myself only," I said.
"Quite passionate," he said while looking at me quiet amusingly.
I smiled and said, "I am always passionate about the things I love."
Then suddenly a bright headlight fell on my face. I think someone arrived at this late night, but who was it? I tried to see the person inside the black car, but before I could see his face, the car door opened and the person stepped out. The headlight was still on, so I couldn't see his face, but then when the headlight switched off—