Author's Note: Hi everyone, I just wanted to let you know that even though this chapter didn't turn out exactly as I wanted, I wrote it with a lot of love. From now on, I'm going to start asking for stars. For the next chapter, I'll ask for about forty. I love you all.
"Good morning," said the one now known as Uncle Grandpa, appearing with an absurd nonchalance that only he could possess. We stared at each other for several seconds in a silence as awkward as it was surreal. Or rather, my silence, because he was calmly playing chess with himself while I sank into a whirlpool of chaotic thoughts.
Finally, I sighed and said aloud that I had definitely gone mad. That caught his attention, and he looked up.
"Not at all, kid," he replied with a disarming calmness that only worsened my inner turmoil.
"I'm here to help you."
I watched him without speaking, ran a hand through my hair, and felt my fingers tremble. I really was going crazy, wasn't I? Doubt gnawed at me, and my own brain seemed to have lost all trust in itself.
"Maybe," he replied, offering me a pizza, which I took almost automatically. I started eating mindlessly, as if it were the only sane thing in the universe.
"So, what the hell are you doing here, Uncle Grandpa?" I said with a mixture of nervous laughter and desperation. None of this could be real. He couldn't be there. I must be dreaming. Yes, that was it. A strange, intense, and completely absurd dream. I was sure to wake up any minute.
"I came so you could summon your shield," he said calmly, as if he were asking me to pass the salt.
I stared at him silently, unsure whether to laugh, cry, or simply accept my fate. "My shield," I repeated, even more uncertain.
"Yes, that's what my purse said. Right, Belly Purse?"
"Of course, Uncle Grandpa," the purse replied, sticking out an enormous tongue and showing me a picture of myself. "Although this Steven seems stronger than the one in the picture," he added cheekily. The picture, clearly, was of the other Steven. The one from Future.
"It's another Steven," I muttered after a few seconds of silence as a cold sensation ran down my spine.
"Hey," Uncle Grandpa said, examining the photo with a pair of eyes I didn't know he possessed.
"I can summon him now," I mentioned, and promptly summoned my shield in front of him. His reaction was so exaggerated it almost made me back away. He was so surprised that his eyes, tongue, and even his skin flew off, leaving only his skeleton as if that were normal.
I stared at him, even more confused, and could barely manage to ask if he had completely lost his mind.
Quickly, as if nothing had happened, Uncle Grandpa recovered in a second.
"This has never happened before, Belly Bag," Uncle Grandpa said with an odd seriousness as he floated lightly in the air. "We must help that child." Then he looked directly at me, as if I were suddenly the key to his absurd plan.
And you're coming with me. Since you can summon him, you should help me.
I opened my mouth to reply, but I didn't even have time to form a word. A black hole suddenly appeared beneath my feet, swallowing me with brutal force.
UNCLE GRANDPA, YOU SON OF A BITCH—
I didn't finish, because the hole slammed shut, cutting my scream off mid-sentence.
What a vocabulary, Bolso Belly commented indignantly.
"You can say that again," Uncle Grandpa replied as he floated on his back, slowly rotating like some absurd satellite. Then he mumbled something completely unintelligible, a strange mix of backward words and mystical sounds: "Ragell ed oroh, oresorg le noc naivnen em euq selatro." His body began to dissolve into shimmering particles until it vanished as if it had never been there.
Lapis looked up from the bed, confused. She seemed to have heard my voice in the distance, but when she realized I wasn't there, she simply shook her head and lay back down, wrapping herself deeper in the blankets as if nothing strange had happened.
Meanwhile, I was floating in absolute emptiness. There was no light, no floor, no sky. Just an infinite silence that echoed in my thoughts. A few seconds passed that felt like an eternity, and then the world decided to stop being kind.
Suddenly, I started to fall.
"SHIT!" I screamed as I plummeted toward a surface that looked like sand. I squeezed my eyes shut, bracing for the brutal impact with the ground. But before I could even eat half the dessert, a giant hand reached out and caught me in mid-air.
"Good morning," Uncle Grandpa's voice said with irritating calmness, setting me down with exaggerated gentleness, as if I were a newborn baby.
The moment my feet touched the ground, I wobbled. I was dizzy, confused, and utterly incapable of keeping up with this character's chaotic rhythm. I felt like my brain was two thoughts away from quitting its job and going on permanent strike.
"Looks like you're in one piece," Uncle Grandpa said with an innocent smile, as if I hadn't done anything wrong at all. I just let out a long, tired sigh as I stared back at the house. It was familiar... yet not. It was like seeing a memory that didn't quite belong in my head.
"So this is where we're supposed to be, right?" I said, raising an eyebrow in resignation.
"Of course," Uncle Grandpa replied as an extra hand appeared out of nowhere, holding a list. It was a list written entirely in code that made no sense to any sane mind. It looked more like a Lovecraftian manuscript than anything useful. I leaned over his shoulder, and seeing it, I simply gave up.
"Get this over with. I have a furious Jasper in my world," I said as I started walking toward the house, trying to leave before things got worse.
"You're absolutely right," Uncle Grandpa said, following me as if we were on a casual stroll. We both reached the door.
"So, what do we do?" I asked, raising an eyebrow again because obviously nothing was going to be normal.
"Well, we knock with our 8000 door knocker," he said matter-of-factly.
He pulled the device out of some impossible corner of the universe and pressed a button. First, a guitar appeared and began to play on its own, then an extra hand tapped out a strange rhythm, then a violin emerged and was taken over by a multicolored cat that played with the grace of an interdimensional tavern musician. Finally, that cat hissed loudly, and a woodpecker appeared to pound on the door like a rock drum kit.
I remained silent. Strange as it was, it felt too much like some thoughts I didn't like to admit I had.
"Good morning," Uncle Grandpa said, not giving me time to process anything. The moment we stepped through the door, my eyes met my younger self. Or rather... the other me from this universe. He was shorter, rounder, and adorably confused. Although our heights weren't that different, perception made him look even smaller. He was maybe 5'6", I was around 5'9". It wasn't a huge difference, but for my age and compared to the original, it was quite noticeable.
"Huh?" said little Steven, looking at us with squints, confused and curious. But as soon as he saw Uncle Grandpa, his face lit up completely with a smile I'd personally never seen so big on anyone.
"UNCLE GRANDPAAAA!" he shouted with overflowing happiness that almost knocked me over.
Uncle Grandpa opened his arms as if he were welcoming a dear old friend, and then the conversation began.
Uncle Grandpa explained with all the excitement in the world that he had come to make sure everything was in order, that the cosmic threads of fate wouldn't get tangled, and that the universe wouldn't become a confusing jumble of timelines. He said that time, space, reality, and breakfast had to be kept in balance. He also mentioned that his duty was to visit alternate versions of important people, especially when their emotional, cosmic, and heroic energy was about to overflow.
Then he pointed at him, the short Steven, and told him that he also had an important role, because one Steven always influenced another Steven even if they didn't know each other, since the Stevens were connected by a kind of universal protective instinct that even he couldn't quite explain.
Finally, he pointed at me with sudden seriousness and said that I was there because there were things I couldn't solve alone in my world, and that crossing realities was part of the process of learning not to break myself on the inside before breaking something on the outside.
"I'm just here to help you summon your shield," I said, letting my instincts guide me. Even though I was standing in front of Uncle Grandpa and a version of myself... or not myself... well, it didn't matter; it was time to let loose.
I summoned my shield with a confident smile, and immediately the youngest Steven's eyes widened, so bright they seemed to illuminate his entire face from ear to ear.
"How do I do that?" the little boy asked, pointing at my shield with overflowing excitement. He asked me to show it to him, and I simply handed it over as if nothing were amiss.
He took it in both hands and began examining it as if it were an ancient treasure. He touched its texture, observed its shine, the light it emanated, the precise curve of its edge. He saw everything with the concentration of a child absorbing multiversal knowledge through his fingers.
I just stared at him, a bead of sweat trickling down my forehead, speechless, wondering if I'd ever had so much energy.
"And how do you summon it?" the younger Steven asked, with that chubby, cocky face that reminded me why I never wanted to be that round again. That face was dangerous. It could make anyone confess everything.
I was going to explain. I really was. I opened my mouth to tell him the basics, but before I could utter a single word, Uncle Grandpa taped my mouth shut with a piece of tape that appeared out of nowhere. I froze, staring at him with a raised eyebrow and a curse stuck in my throat.
"Oh no, big Steven," he said, wagging a finger like I was some naughty kid. "You can't just tell him like that. He has to experience it, know what you did, feel what you did to summon your shield." So… —she said, turning toward the portal with that smile that heralded chaos— let's go to an area I really like.
She grabbed our hands without asking and said:
It's time to go after the truth of the universe.
And so the three of us disappeared into the portal's light without anyone questioning why on earth Uncle Grandpa could open a multiversal portal as if it were a bathroom door.
Meanwhile, Amethyst, Garnet, and Pearl were at the entrance to Steven's room. They had been discussing how to help him with his shield problem, looking for ways to cheer him up, support him, teach him to control it. They were ready to enter with words of encouragement.
But what they saw when they opened the door simply defied all logic.
Steven. With two other guys.
One was old, with a belly, with a completely absurd design... but strangely familiar to them, though they didn't know why.
And the other... another Steven. Similar to him, but stronger, more confident, taller. With a gaze that seemed lost somewhere far away, as if he were standing in two realities at the same time.
"Did we just see Steven take Steven?" Amethyst asked, her mouth agape, as if she needed confirmation because her brain was already shutting down.
"My baby's in trouble," Pearl said, not letting Garnet say anything else. Garnet tried to see a vision of the future, but the timeline was so distorted by Uncle Grandpa's presence that her glasses glowed with static.
Pearl didn't wait any longer. She grabbed Amethyst's arm and pushed Garnet forward, and without a second thought, the three of them jumped into the portal's glow, disappearing in a wave of light that swallowed their figures.
Steven was sure he had just seen the god who had brought him there, while Uncle Grandpa teleported them through an absurd number of places. So many different scenarios flashed by that I finally had to grab my mini version before it got lost floating among so many realities.
It felt like an eternity of dimensional jumps, with Uncle Grandpa just shaking his head as if he were checking off some cosmic list.
"Is that Adventure Time?" I asked, my face completely expressionless. Honestly, this day was starting off so well... until Uncle Grandpa showed up.
"Well," Uncle Grandpa said calmly, "that's Finn. Someday I'll have to help him. Too bad he's not a priority. He can manage on his own, even if he is just a kid," he added with a wisdom that didn't quite match his chaotic personality.
Before I could process the comment, he glanced to the side and said,
"Here it is."
He teleported us suddenly, and we appeared in a vast, strange space.
"What is this?" said Little Steven, looking at every corner with that restless curiosity of his.
"Here, my dear little Steven, is..." Uncle Grandpa said dramatically, "Pizza Steve's training area." Amazing, right? This place is so tough it can withstand his most powerful attacks.
I watched him silently, too weak to question anything else. I simply sat and waited to see what the multidimensional old man had planned.
I remembered that show where there was an episode where he helped Steven... the other Steven. What was happening now was so similar to that that for a moment I felt like I was in a parody. But I wasn't in the mood to deal with my mini version. I didn't hate him, I just felt he was too childish... something that clearly didn't match his size or what I was now.
I watched as Uncle Grandpa explained things to little Steven, and he broke into a huge grin as he started trying everything: pushing, posing, shouting, vibrations, absurd movements, almost a ritual dance. All because he thought that's how he would summon his shield.
The scenery kept changing without warning. First we were on a beach. Then in a desert. Then in a forest. Then on the moon. Then we went into space. We even made it to Homeworld; I was terrified there, but Uncle Grandpa sensed my fear and transported us straight to Lion's mane.
Don't even ask me how it all worked. I can only say that, even though time was passing, I ended up enjoying the moment. I even got more involved in the conversation, showing little Steven how he flew. That moment made me laugh out loud when I saw him looking at me with admiration, as if I were a superhero.
After several hours in which the three of us tried to figure out how little Steven would summon his shield, we finally came to a conclusion... which, to be honest, I already knew from the beginning.
I looked at Uncle Grandpa. He nodded, letting me explain.
"Steven," I said, making the little boy look at me intently.
"I know this is new to you. Even now you can't summon him, but you really need to. It's not pressure... but you'll need to."
Little Steven took a deep breath and nodded firmly.
"You just... *sigh* You need to have a clear feeling. The feeling of warmth. The feeling that makes you feel protected. Another one you also need is love. Appreciation for something or someone."
I stared at him, and he watched me as if I were explaining the secret recipe for Coca-Cola.
I smiled.
"You just have to let it flow. If you force it, you won't be able to summon him. If you stress yourself out, you won't be able to either."
I patted his head gently. He made an adorable pout, puffing out his cheeks as if he wanted to protest, but without saying a word.
The little boy closed his eyes with trembling determination. He had heard every word, though his little hands trembled slightly with excitement. Big Steven looked at him with a strange, almost paternal pride, taking a deep breath and murmuring that he trusted him, that he knew he could do it, that he just had to let it flow. The little boy clenched his fists as if he were grasping the very warmth of the universe.
The training room fell silent. Even Pizza Steve, who no one knew when he'd been plastered on a nearby wall, seemed to be holding his breath. Little Steven took a breath, thought of something warm, thought of his mother, his home, his newfound courage. For a second, nothing happened... and then a small pink spark appeared before him. It trembled like a bubble about to burst, but it didn't explode; on the contrary, it grew and expanded until it formed a small, glowing shield.
The little boy's eyes snapped open, and a shout of excitement escaped him without permission. Big Steven blinked in surprise before jumping to his feet so fast he almost lost his balance in mid-air. Uncle Grandpa let out a celebratory squeal so loud it echoed throughout the fracture room.
Big Steven was the first to react. He lunged forward to hug the little one tightly, lifting him off the floor and spinning him around once. The shield vanished in a bright flash, but the accomplishment was etched on their faces. The little one laughed with a sound so pure that, for a second, Steven stopped feeling the weight of everything else.
Uncle Grandpa joined the hug, squeezing them both so hard he practically took the wind out of them, declaring how incredibly proud he was that his little Steven was already a master of love and inner warmth, though Big Steven frowned because he wasn't sure if that last bit sounded weird or not.
In the end, the three of them were together, laughing, happy, and breathing in an air that seemed lighter, as if the universe had given them permission to exist so well, even if only for a little while. Little Steven looked at his older self as if he had just discovered a future that didn't frighten him, and Big Steven, for the first time in a long time, felt that maybe he too could trust in that future.
The three spent a peaceful time while Little Steven kept summoning his shield again and again. Each attempt was brighter, more defined, and each success sparked spontaneous laughter and celebrations. It was a beautiful day, one of those that Big Steven rarely allowed himself to enjoy. Little Steven looked at him as if he had found a secret hero, and Uncle Grandpa floated around, making exaggerated comments that echoed in that indestructible room.
"Hey," I said, looking at Uncle Grandpa.
"What's up, son?" he replied, watching four ants with machine guns reenact the war in Ukraine as if it were perfectly normal.
"Will I ever see you again? It seems like I missed a lot of people."
Uncle Grandpa looked at me with an exaggerated smile.
"Of course, in fact, you know what? I'll introduce you to them now."
His hand pierced the wall like jelly, leaving me with a bead of cold sweat trickling down my forehead.
"Mr. Gus!"
The aforementioned appeared with a frying pan in his hand and what looked like a perfectly cooked breakfast. I was completely confused.
"Huh? What's up, Uncle P?" he asked, looking at not one, but two Stevens: one fat and a jerk, and the other ripped... and also a jerk.
"Oh, if it isn't the Steven Universes. Are you babysitting them?" Mr. Gus said, raising an eyebrow as if this were the most common thing on the planet.
"Yep," Uncle Grandpa replied. But suddenly, his 100% real, no-fake watch started beeping.
"Oh, holy codfish," he said with a face so funny it looked like it had been drawn by a hyperactive kid with three fingers of sugar on it.
"Mr. Gus, I'm leaving both Stevens with you. I have to go check if the neurological system is okay."
Mr. Gus just gave a thumbs-up, as if he knew exactly what he was talking about (clearly he had no idea).
"I'm off, see you later," Uncle Grandpa said as a multicolored black hole opened up beside him and a celestial horse appeared, which carried him like it was an interdimensional Uber.
Little Steven was staring, his jaw practically on the floor, completely shocked.
I, on the other hand, just had the most "XD" face possible.
"Hello," Mr. Gus said now. "Follow me, I want to show you the camper."
As soon as he opened the door, we both went inside, and we arrived at an interior that seemed like a whole other universe.
"Amazing!" exclaimed little Steven, his eyes sparkling.
"Totally," I replied, looking around. Different worlds appeared through a window; I could even swear I saw the Dragon Ball world... and honestly, I don't want to get into that mess. I can't see myself enduring a Kamehameha without galactic health insurance.
I shook my head and looked at the sofa, on which... wow.
"A tiger," said little Steven, running to hug it without a second thought.
I just turned to look at Mr. Gus.
"Do you think I have little to no survival instinct?"
"50/50," he said with a grimace, crossing his arms. "But the good thing is that Realistic Giant Flying Tiger is friendly."
"That's great," I replied, as the hyper-realistic PNG of the tigress began to play with the little boy as if they'd known each other forever.
"Should we leave them? I want to see the rest of the cabin, you know?" I said curiously.
"Okay," Mr. Gus agreed. Before we left, he told the lioness to show the boy around.
"Roar," she replied in a feline, bossy voice.
As we walked, I saw a wall covered in frames.
"Is that... a nuclear explosion?" I asked, surprised and slightly admiring.
"Oh, yeah," Mr. Gus said, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. "It was when Pizza Steve did such a great backflip that the air resistance caused that explosion. Uncle P took the picture to immortalize it. A historic moment."
"Holy shit," I muttered as I looked at more Pizza Steve memorabilia as if he were a national hero.
"Language," Mr. Gus corrected me, walking toward a computer placed in the middle of the hallway as if it were part of a feng shui plan.
"Come on, look at this, Steven," he said, showing me one of his drawings.
"What detail," I commented on the illustration.
"It's fan art I did when I was bored," he said with absolute pride.
"Wouldn't that gem on the tail be better placed somewhere less vulnerable?" I asked him in the tone of an anime sage.
"Maybe," he replied, and we both sat there analyzing the fan art like idiots, as if it were a high-priority nuclear strategic plan.
And so we spent a good while observing every detail, commenting on absurd things as if they were scientific theories, and talking about topics that didn't involve yelling, existential drama, or surprise attacks by vengeful birds. I really needed to talk to people who had at least a 2.0 IQ. I don't mean to offend my universe, but honestly, it's starting to bother me a little. XD
But every day has its end. Both Stevens were taken back home by Uncle Grandpa, and as soon as they crossed the threshold, the atmosphere changed. Little Steven ran inside with a smile, while Big Steven walked a little slower, sensing something strange in the air. As they stepped back outside, both of them saw Uncle Grandpa vanish along with the entire place.
Big Steven was left in a vast, silent void, floating without any sign of the strange old man. He raised an eyebrow, confused, until a deep voice resonated everywhere as if it came from infinity itself.
"My nephew," the voice said as the void vibrated.
Steven slowly turned around. "Huh?" he asked. "Are you God?"
The voice sounded genuinely confused. "What?" he said. "No, that's my buddy. I'm just getting rid of the problem."
Steven didn't know whether he felt offended or intrigued.
"You're always helping others," the voice continued. I know you're stressed, I know you're giving it your all, so I'll give you a hand. A guide. Think of it as one little help for another today. You're one of the weirdest versions of Steven I've ever seen, you know?
"I'm one of a kind," I said, causing the voice to burst into laughter so loud it shook the void.
"You're missing some quills," it replied.
Before he could ask, Steven felt a tingle in his fist. Bubbles formed around his hand, enveloping it before solidifying into glittering quills. He stared at them in surprise, with the strange feeling that he'd done this before without remembering.
"You're doing well, kid. Keep it up and you can lead this world in a new direction."
Steven could only blink before being flung back into his reality as if someone had flipped a giant switch.
As soon as he returned, he heard Belly Bag's voice begin to speak from somewhere. "It's different," it murmured. You were very quiet today. You didn't do what you usually do.
Meanwhile, in some cosmic corner, Uncle Grandpa observed the void from his space truck. "My buddy said to treat him well," he confessed quietly. "He's suffered quite a bit, even if he doesn't remember it because of the time he's spent in the void. Poor soul." He shook his head as he checked his phone, which displayed a message more unsettling than usual.
"Finding him was never a coincidence," said Belly Bag, peeking out.
"Not at all," replied Uncle Grandpa. "It was always planned. I needed a day off. But we must keep going." He looked at his list and murmured a name. Clarence. Interesting.
Steven fell hard onto his bed, eyes wide open, breathing rapidly, his hands still encased in the bubbles transformed into spikes. The impact didn't shake him. He seemed like a body falling weightlessly, without resistance.
Lapis was walking toward the room when a black hole appeared in the middle of the house. She saw Steven shoot toward her bed as if something had launched him from another universe. What truly froze her wasn't the portal, but Steven's expression, an empty, overflowing mix of madness she'd never seen in him before.
"Steven?" she said, her anxiety growing.
"I saw."
"I saw."
Steven repeated without blinking, as if the word were too big for his mind.
"Did you see what?" Lapis asked, terrified. "Did he see the Diamonds?" she thought, her heart racing.
"I saw God."
Steven went pale as a ghost.
"Who is God?"
End of Chapter 44.