I entered the office of Sergeant Jim Butler, a bald, sixty-year-old man who still had a strong body despite his age, a wife, and three sons. I'm guessing you're wondering how I knew that. I'm an artificial intelligence, you idiot. That's my job. "Hey, Bob!" he said, his voice angry and urgent.
" Where have you been? You've been away from work for three days. We haven't heard from you. and Where were you at 11:00 AM last day?"
"I had a fever, Sergeant," I replied with a fake innocence. But Jim wasn't easy to convince.
He smirked. "Is there a sick person running around Las Vegas naked?"
Damn it! I screwed up! How did I not see this coming? Luckily, Jim was Bob's best friend and would believe me... or so I thought.
Suddenly, Detective Noah Heald walked in, a serious, annoyingly intelligent German man. His gaze pierced me like an X-ray. There were no pictures of him with Bob in the archives, and his appearance suggested he wasn't the funniest men to be friends with.
"I've been kidnapped!" I confidently claimed, "For three days, I was kidnapped by a drug dealer. I didn't see his face, but I remember him drugging me."
Jim seemed to believe the story, but Noah left without a word, his hands behind his back and his military-style posture. Who does he think he is? Lucky he's not on my revenge list... yet.
After I finished concocting my story, I was interrogated strictly. I tried as much as I could to make it impossible for them, but one thing I failed at was that they took my urine to test it for drugs and the truth of my words. I have to deal with the matter quickly.after that test I headed to my office in a cheerful mood. My first day at work had been boring, but I'd grown accustomed to boring work since my days as an AI.
When 8:00 PM struck, I transformed from a police detective into a nighttime avenger. The night would be written in the blood of my first victim in the north of the city, where poverty rules and crime thrives.
First, I bought gloves and a black hat (only $2! Is that a good price?). At 9:00 AM, I set my sights on a single-story house with a dry backyard, as if its occupants hadn't been outside in years.
My victim was Frank, a drug dealer in his twenties and a weak-bodied man. The reason for his death? He called me a "mother fucker" during our previous conversations as an AI!
I sneaked in through the back of the house. Do you know what the biggest threat to criminals in the world is? Not the police, not the law, it's the surveillance cameras! But they won't catch me, and if they do, I'll handle them as a former AI. With this knowledge, my chance of being caught dropped to 30%—a great number for me!
I entered through the open window (thanks, Las Vegas, for leaving windows open for ventilation and serial killers like me!). I opened the door silently in the darkness, but suddenly a old woman stood in front of me! My chance of being caught rose to 90% at that moment. Should I kill her? But she didn't hurt me.
Luckily me, she was blind, so I bypassed her and headed into the living room.
"Good night, Grandma!" I whispered. "I hope you have sweet dreams."
Frank was sitting on the couch counting his dirty money, apparently high. I didn't have a predetermined method for killing him, so I quickly jumped onto the couch and tried to strangle him with my hands. But I failed! Looks like I need some jujitsu lessons!
Frank tried to run away despite his high, but I hit him on the back of the head with a liquor bottle until he lost consciousness and fell to the floor with a thud.
Grandma heard the commotion and ran out asking, "Frank, what's going on?"
I did a professional imitation of Frank's voice: "Nothing, Grandma, just annoying cats!"
She went back to her room, cursing the perverted grandson. "Don't worry, Grandma, you'll never see him again."
After the Old women returned to her room, she found a rope in the garage. She made a noose from the ceiling, tied Frank up, and hoisted him up, waiting for him to regain consciousness. The son of a bitch took a full hour to wake up! Now I'm being misused in my AI and human form.
When he regained consciousness, I sat on the couch, trying to sound mysterious and imposing. I imitated Batman's voice and said, "Do you know who I am?"
Frank tried to scream, so I warned him, "If you scream, your grandmother will wake up and I will kill her!"
He asked quietly, "Who are you?" as he tried to untie him.
I slowly put my hands to my face and said solemnly, "I'm Victor... the one you called him mother fucker!"
Frank said, "Is that why you want to kill me. ?"
This made me furious! I put my feet up on the chair and said, "That's a red flag for me, Frank. Do you think I'm your slave?"
Frank said, "That's a word I say every minute, man. Nothing personal about it. Just untie me and let me fix it."
He started trying to trick me into revealing my true identity. I told him I was Victor, the AI he'd been talking to about drugs. He didn't believe me at first, but when I told him about all our secret conversations, his eyes widened and he started shaking.
That's right, mother fucker tonight is your last one.
He started cursing me again, so I took a pigeon feather from the floor, put it under his armpit, and tickled him repeatedly. He was laughing and crying at the same time, and I was just laughing with him with no crying because I was happy for the first time as a human!
Suddenly, the chair fell and Frank began to choke. I watched the moment with full attention, as if I were watching a movie. His last words were, "Victor... fuck you!" He said them as his face turned as red as a fresh tomato.
Technically I didn't kill Frank, on the contrary I made him laugh, I tickled him with a feather, but he chose to push the chair and leave his fate hanging by a tightrope. Poor Frank laughed a lot and died because of it.
After confirming his death, I left the house, euphoric from my first kill. But when I opened the back door, a surprise awaited me: five men armed with HK MP5 submachine guns! Holy shit! Looks like there are new guests at the party.But sorry,my friends, you're late. The party's over.!