Chapter 1 – My End
(Only the first chapter will be in the first POV.)
I'm bored.
Extremely… bored.
No, I don't mean it in the sense that I hate my life. I am a sane and, frankly, normal human being—at least by society's standards. I go to school, I study, I have friends, and I've dated a few times before. I've lived through what any normal child growing up would. I have two loving parents with a decent financial situation and a beautiful house. I'm of average height and looks, although I'm considered very smart academically and decent athletically.
All in all, if I had to rate myself… hm, I'd say I'm a solid 6/10 human being in a world where most people are 5/10. Not too shabby.
However, all of that doesn't matter to me. Because I'm insatiably bored—so bored that my mind has started stretching my days longer than they actually are.
The thing is, my life… is far too bland. There's nothing exciting about me. I'm just a person among billions, another insignificant speck of dust in a world full of specks of dust. You wouldn't even notice if one disappeared, would you?
For years now—ever since I gained consciousness—I've been too bored. People didn't interest me, hobbies didn't interest me, and school certainly didn't interest me. From my seat in this world, I watch people smile and enjoy their lives and wonder to myself… what's so enjoyable about your average life?
Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not some edgy teen looking at people and thinking, "Huh, you're a bunch of losers who don't understand the true meaning of life" or some nonsense like that. I'm simply asking: what's so thrilling about such a life?
What gets your blood running? Your heart pumping? Adrenaline coursing through your veins?
Isn't that what makes the body feel most alive?
I've looked into it and apparently, the mechanism of fear in the human body does that. It makes you feel more alive and aware so you can avoid danger better. Yet most of the people around me have felt adrenaline only a handful of times in their lives. They've never truly had a consistent and strong relationship with being conscious and aware to the full capacity of their brains.
I hate that. Not in others—but in myself. I want to feel alive in my own world. I don't want to go about my day, then go to sleep, only to wake up to another iteration of the same day I've been living for the past ten years.
It didn't matter what I did; nothing seemed to move my heart or make me feel anything. I can't feel what they feel, and that's mildly irritating.
I wish I could just… be one of them. Someone who isn't thinking about a billion different things at the same time, every second of the day. I hate it. It's torture I live with.
I wish I could be someone else—so I could be blissfully unaware.
Yet here I am, stuck in a numb husk of a body, rotting away with my brain as my prison.
It's… pathetic.
***
RINGRINGRING
It was 11 AM, and the school bell rang, announcing the end of the first part of the school day. It was time for lunch break, and the students, as usual, left their seats to go eat or talk to their friends.
My seat is in the middle, right row. A position surrounded by people which, in the grand scheme of things, didn't bother me.
"Are you going to get lunch, Jack?"
My friend, who sat a seat in front of me, turned around with a smile. His name is Alexander—Alex for short. He's a rather good-looking young man with blond hair, blue eyes, a friendly personality, and a rich background. He's what many would call a prince in shining armor.
I honestly don't know how we became friends. It simply seemed to happen at some point in our lives, and we stuck with it. Also, he's a very simple person, so he spares me some brain capacity.
"Yeah, I was about to. Give me a second." I replied, reaching into my backpack for my wallet. I like being organized and meticulous about my things, even though having a brown leather wallet at 17 might make me seem ten years older.
"Let's go."
I stood up, and Alex followed me out of the classroom. The hallway was bustling with movement as usual. It was a bit too noisy for my liking, but I'd grown familiar with it long ago.
We walked to the vending machines to get some drinks before heading to the cafeteria, where everyone usually went to eat. It was choked full of people, so we simply took our food and left quickly.
There's a place where Alex and I go to eat: the rooftop. Unlike most other high schools, it's usually unlocked here. But since there aren't any seats up there, people don't really go there to eat—especially when the weather's cold.
However, I value peace more than warmth.
"Mmm, today is quite sunny." Alex said as we walked through the doors. "Very nice."
"Be careful not to get sunburned," I replied casually, setting my tray down and sitting to eat.
"I put sunscreen on every day. Man, I hate having pale skin. I wish I had a cool tan."
'I'm pretty sure all the girls who yearn for you don't agree with that,' I thought, then started eating silently.
Meanwhile, Alex sat there, just enjoying the warmth of the sun and the nice weather.
"Life is really good…" he muttered, almost as if completely satisfied with everything. That, however, made me stop eating.
"What makes you feel that way?"
"... I don't know. I'm happy." He shrugged. "I don't need a reason to be happy."
'Interesting.'
I always knew Alex was a very happy-go-lucky person with a carefree spirit. But it was still amusing how little he needed to be satisfied with life. He is truly the normal human being of all normal human beings.
"We're living our years. Enjoying our time. It's very peaceful and I love that."
"Hm…" I hummed, continuing to eat without adding any comment. There was really nothing I could say that wouldn't be met with confusion or denial. All people are just like that.
Then, as if he finally realized he was hungry, Alex started eating too. A bit later, we finished our lunch and he stood up, walking to the edge of the rooftop to look down.
"Mmmm, the view of the city from here is great," he declared.
"We'll have to go down soon," I replied.
"Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm just relaxing for a bit. Savoring the moment."
Then Alex started humming a song—probably his favorite—while nodding his head. I simply sat there, waiting.
"Hm, hm, hm… Hm?"
At a random moment, Alex's hums stopped with a confused sound. Then he tilted his head down as if to look closer. Something had caught his attention down there. He couldn't tell what it was at first but it didn't take long for him to realize.
"Hey… Jack."
"What?"
"Can you come here for a second?" he asked in an oddly wary tone.
"What is it?"
"Just come here. I want you to see something."
I sighed and stood up, walking toward him. "What is it?"
"Look there." He pointed down at the school gates. "What's happening down there?"
"Hm?" I didn't understand what he meant at first, so I looked down. At the gates of the school, two people were slamming their hands and heads against the iron door. Their movements were frantic and odd, almost like they were going through a psychotic episode of sorts.
"I don't know…" I muttered, squinting my eyes. Something didn't seem right about that.
Then I saw one of the security guards walk to the gates to check. I couldn't hear what he said, but I could tell he was telling them to move away or leave.
But… they didn't listen. They kept smashing their bodies into the gates again and again, getting more and more violent with each passing second. So the guard opened the gate to push them away.
However, at that very moment, it happened. Something I never thought could ever occur. Something that would change my life forever.
A moment that brought me to this very point, writing all of this on a piece of crumpled paper. Looking back at it, it was truly such an underwhelming first encounter with all of this. One would expect a more epic introduction to this wild story of mine. Yet, that was all it was... Two men banging on a closed gate.
And my life was no longer the same.
I don't know what the future holds for me, and frankly, I don't want to see it. Whether it's good or bad… I'll leave all of it here.
My moment of change.
My End.
(A/N: Don't forget to add the book to your library and donate some power stones.)