The grand church looks less holy and more like a gladiator arena. Sunlight cuts across the wooden table where ARLO and TESSA face off, fists poised. It's not a game anymore—it's war.
"Ready to lose, peasant?" Tessa smirked.
Arlo grinning nervously, "Ready to eat those words, princess?"
Arlo's nervously talking to himself, "Okay, stay calm. Rock-Paper-Scissors is basically fate with a costume. I've got the Herald skill. Fate is my thing. This is my battlefield. Totally not panicking. Definitely not sweating. ...I am sweating."
Tessa flicks her golden hair back like she's about to step onto a runway instead of play a children's game.
"Loser scrubs my chamber pots for a month. Winner... well, I'm not worried about that."
Arlo nervously laughs, "Wow. Confident. Love that for you. Not intimidating at all."
ROUND ONE
TESSA & ARLO:
"Rock... Paper... Scissors—shoot!"
Arlo throws ROCK. Tessa throws PAPER.
Tessa beams like she's already carved "loser" onto his tombstone.
"Oooh, paper beats rock. One for me~."
Arlo groaning, "Wow, yeah, congrats on defeating geology."
Arlo thought, "Okay, not the best start. But it's best two out of three. Still plenty of room to crush her smug little grin."
ROUND TWO
TESSA & ARLO:
"Rock... Paper... Scissors—shoot!"
Arlo throws SCISSORS.
Tessa throws PAPER.
Arlo blinks. Then grins. "Ha! Snip, snip, celebrity. That's one for me."
Tessa's smile twitches. "Congratulations. You've discovered how cutting tools work."
Arlo: "Feels good to be a genius."
Arlo now having his hopes up, "Yes! Herald of Fortune, baby! All tied up. Now it's down to one last round. Win this, and I'm free. Lose this, and I'm Cinderella with a mop. Big stakes. Huge stakes. Cow-sized stakes."
ROUND THREE – THE DECIDER
The air thickens. Birds stop chirping outside. Even the stained-glass silhouette of Deos looks tense.
Sweat trickles down Arlo's temple. Tessa looks bored, like she's about to file her nails mid-match.
Tessa: "Try not to cry when you lose. The floors get slippery."
Arlo through gritted teeth, "You talk too much."
TESSA & ARLO:
"Rock... Paper... Scissors—shoot!"
Arlo throws ROCK.
Tessa throws SCISSORS.
Arlo gasps. "Yes! Rock smashes scissors! That's game!"
Tessa freezes, her jaw dropping slightly. "...What."
Arlo smug grin, "Guess who's scrubbing my boots tonight?"
Arlo's so excited inside his head, "Her face! Look at her face! Sweet, beautiful victory. Fortune finally pulled through. This is the turning point of my new life—"
Tessa suddenly slams her hand on the table. "Wait! That was practice."
Arlo scandalized, "Practice? We went three rounds!"
Tessa flippant, "Best three out of five. Everyone knows that."
Arlo furious, "That's not a thing! Nobody plays best-of-five Rock-Paper-Scissors!"
Tessa smug, "Celebrity rules. My church, my game, my rules."
Arlo thought to himself, "...This woman is evil. Beautiful, talented, holy... and actual Satan."
ROUND FOUR (TESSA'S "PRACTICE EXTENSION")
TESSA & ARLO:
"Rock... Paper... Scissors—shoot!"
Arlo throws PAPER.
Tessa throws SCISSORS.
Tessa smirks, all her smugness restored. "Oh look, I win again. Funny how that works."
Arlo slamming his fists on the table, "No! That's two-two! We're tied!"
Tessa gasps mockingly, "Which means... sudden death round."
Arlo: "Sudden death?! It's a children's game, not gladiator combat!"
Tessa leans in close, eyes glinting like she's about to banish him personally. "Everything's gladiator combat when your pride's on the line."
Arlo's Inner Monologue:
"This is it. The final showdown. Win, and I'm free. Lose, and I'm a janitor-slash-mascot for the church diva."
FINAL ROUND – THE FATE SEALER
TESSA & ARLO:
"Rock... Paper... Scissors—shoot!"
Arlo throws SCISSORS.
Tessa throws SCISSORS.
A tie.
Both glare at each other like duelists.
Tessa: "Again."
Arlo: "Fine."
SECOND TRY – FINAL ROUND
TESSA & ARLO:
"Rock... Paper... Scissors—shoot!"
Arlo throws ROCK.
Tessa throws PAPER.
Silence.
Tessa grins like the cat who just ate a canary stuffed with gold. "Paper wraps rock. Victory is mine."
Arlo horrified, "No! No, no, no, no—"
Tessa clasps her hands like she's in prayer. "Thank you, dear gods, for gifting me the dumbest servant alive."
Arlo slams his forehead onto the table.
THE AFTERMATH: ARLO THE JANITOR (Montage)
•Arlo scrubbing the church floor while Tessa lounges on a pew sipping imported wine.
•Arlo polishing strained-glass windows while Tessa critiques, "That streak looks like poverty."
•Arlo hauling buckets of water tripping and Tessa gasping, "Careful! That jug is worth more than your entire existence!"
•Arlo polishing the altar as Tessa hums smugly and says "You missed a spot, Oh wait you are the spot"
Arlo slumps against his mop, drenched in sweat. Visibly annoyed, "When I imagined another world, I pictured swords, dragons, maybe even a harem. Not... unpaid janitorial simulator."
Tessa smugly, sipping wine, "Why the frown? Be grateful. Without me, you'd be wolf chow."
Arlo: "Yeah, thanks. I'll put 'Survived tree and church diva' on my resume."
Tessa smiling brightly,"Oh, you flatter me. Church diva. I like that."
Arlo groaning, "Why did fate saddle me with you?"
Tessa shrugs, tossing her golden hair again. "Because I'm fabulous, and you're expendable. Now hush, servant—those floors won't scrub themselves."
Arlo glares at the heavens, gripping the mop like a sword. "Herald of Disaster and Fortune... You'd think "fortune" would've shown up by now. But no. Just disaster. Non-stop, sparkling disaster. One day, though... one day I'll win. And when I do, she's the one polishing my boots."
...Or I'll choke on the mop. Odds are fifty-fifty.