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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: This Mushroom... Is Poisonous

Early summer, Jiang City.

The dark sky gave a sense of oppression, and there was a sweltering heat in the air.

Su Qing sat on the toilet with a pale face, his legs trembling slightly, clenching a wad of toilet paper in his hands. With a flush, a part of himself was lost in the white waiting.

"Poison... poisonous woman!"

"This is poisoning, I'm going to report... report!" Su Qing said through gritted teeth.

He had been sitting on the toilet for more than two hours, but the pain in his stomach showed no signs of disappearing. The main thing was... he was almost going to pass out from having diarrhea, feeling as if he was disconnected from the world in the toilet.

Su Qing was a college graduate of less than a year, with an average education, unable to find an ideal (high salary, little work, close to home, high position with little responsibility) job, so he chose to become a video blogger, hoping to become a million-follower internet celebrity and achieve financial freedom as an ordinary person.

However, due to his limited talent, he's always been in a lukewarm state. Luckily, with the rise of short videos in recent years, even though he was far from reaching a million followers, he could still support himself. After all, sometimes he only ate one meal a day.

He was this way because a fan from Yunnan in the background said they would send him some local specialties. As a lukewarm small blogger, he was quite excited, especially since the fan appeared to be a female, so he happily sent over his address.

That afternoon, the courier delivered a package of homemade Yunnan mushrooms, and without a second thought, he started cooking them, even planning to make a video and change up his content with a food video.

The result was predictable; less than ten minutes after eating, he had diarrhea, which lasted for two hours without stopping.

At this point, even if he were a fool, he'd know there was a problem with those mushrooms, reminding him of a nursery rhyme:

Red umbrella, white stem, eat and lie down together.

Lie down, get buried, friends and relatives come for a meal.

His father had told him that the people you should never provoke in this society are women. If you provoke a woman, from the severe to the extreme, it could cause death, and from the minor to the extreme, it could still lead to death, with no escape. Only now did Su Qing understand why every time his father met his long-lost old friends, he would always say 'Regret having a wife' when parting.

Luckily, besides diarrhea, he didn't experience any other adverse reactions. But even so, he felt he couldn't hold on anymore.

After thinking it over, Su Qing decided to call for help.

Beep, beep...

The call was picked up after two rings, and seeing this, Su Qing quickly said, "Old A... medicine... medicine..."

"Check it out?" the person on the other end said with some confusion.

Su Qing: ...

"Damn you, Jianghu emergency, go to the pharmacy and bring me a box of Imodium, I can't take it anymore!"

Hearing this, the person on the other end was silent for a moment before responding, "Can't take it? I'll match your 200!"

Su Qing: "Less nonsense, I'll treat you to a foot bath."

"Qingzi, it's not that I don't want to go, but it's my girlfriend's birthday today, I really can't help it!" the person on the other end said.

Upon hearing this, Su Qing, sitting on the toilet, couldn't help but roll his eyes: "Are you sick, celebrating a birthday with an inflatable one, production date?"

"Hey, say something? Hello?"

The only response was a busy tone.

"Damn!!"

It turns out that being brothers, in the heart, you can't get through on the phone when needed.

Fortunately, half an hour later, the symptoms of diarrhea significantly eased, allowing him to stagger out of the bathroom.

What followed was a bout of dizziness and weakness, but Su Qing didn't mind, thinking it was a normal reaction to diarrhea.

He collapsed onto the bed, then the world spun. In his dreams, he dreamt of poisonous mushrooms growing all over his body, and then the whole world shattered.

...

When he woke up again, it was already the next morning. At this time, Su Qing's eyes were vacant, like a pool of dead water, and after a long daze, his eyes regained their brightness. He softly said:

"If I don't avenge this, I swear I'm not human!"

As soon as he finished speaking, a voice suddenly sounded in his mind.

[Morning has come, everything revives, and it's the season for animals to mate]

[Old Wang next door plans to deliberately provoke the neighbor's single dog, for mockery]

The voice was slow, deep, and magnetic.

But at this moment, Su Qing looked around in horror:

"Who? Who's talking?"

The voice had no direction, appearing directly in his mind.

As soon as he spoke, a sound came from the wall by the bed. Since the community he lived in was relatively old, the soundproofing wasn't very good, and he could even hear some strange noises.

Su Qing: Σ(°△°

His questions got no answers, and two minutes later, even the next-door noises stopped.

"Hallucination, haha, it must be a hallucination, I must not be fully awake yet." Su Qing slapped his face, trying to clear his head.

Thinking of this, he hurriedly searched for his phone, trying to question that female fan, but he immediately found that he had been blocked.

"Absconding out of guilt? It can't be!"

At this point, Su Qing was thinking if he had offended someone recently, why would someone try to poison him.

Since he had no leads, he could only consider it bad luck. He went to the kitchen to heat up leftovers from the previous day.

But at this moment, the magnetic voice sounded once again in his mind.

[High-end ingredients only need the simplest cooking methods. The leftovers before you have already spoiled after a night of fermentation; eating them will let you experience hospital internet speed in thirty minutes]

Su Qing: O__O

This time, he was very sure he heard someone speaking, definitely not a hallucination.

"Who? Who is it?"

Su Qing searched for the source of the sound in terror, but found nothing after searching the entire house.

Looking at the leftovers, he couldn't help but recall the voice he heard earlier. After thinking for a long time, he decided to throw them away. Yesterday's diarrhea left him anxious, and he couldn't get food poisoning again.

[The spoiled food has been destroyed]

[Old Wang next door was kicked out by his partner due to poor mating performance. Resenting you, he will kick your door in retaliation]

The voice in his head sounded again, slow and unhurried. This time, Su Qing was truly scared because anyone who encountered something so bizarre would instinctively feel fear.

But in the next second, there was a thud, and the living room door shook.

At this moment, Su Qing couldn't help but widen his eyes. Was someone really kicking his door? How could it be?

Thinking of this, he rushed forward to open the door, but only saw a white figure flash by.

Even though it was just a figure, Su Qing was sure that person was indeed his neighbor. He didn't pursue, opting instead to slam the door shut and lean against it, clutching his chest, whispering apprehensively:

"Damn, these poisonous mushrooms are really strong!"

...

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