I had lots of things to write on here, lots: so many reasons—explaining and persuading, convincing, maybe even pleading, commanding, shouting—why you should read this, and will find it interesting. But, unfortunately, as the writer's curse would have it, now, as I'm faced with the screen, I'm blank, and I keep erasing, unable to write those reasons.
My critical voice keeps screaming, midway as I struggle to write:
"Not good enough of a reason." "Nah, too much!" "Okay, you're not convincing them, you're just being a total jerk." "Don't bore them, alright!" "Why're you saying this, they'll see that you're scared, that all your many talks is not due to the fact that you're confident, but due to the fear that this is gonna flop and flop so bad." "A very cringey thing to say, delete it. Okay, go ahead, leave it, you'll read this again some day and choke yourself on your pillow. Mark my words."
Twice, I've closed the screen. Thrice, I've opened it. And a giant's handful, totally-normal number of times-I've left, and I've returned, and I've felt even more stupid each time I returned. And I've decided... that...
I have decided that...
I did decide that, I...
(Strange..)
(Well, I did decide on something. I'm confident a hundred percent that I did. Otherwise, I wouldn't be pouring random thoughts on here.)
.....
(Anyways, would say what I decided on when I do remember, and if I do remember that I ought to tell them.)
So, I wouldn't be trying to persuade or convince or shout or,...
(I should just give them additional information on what I think they'want to know, as, to be honest, that synopsis was a bit too vague.)
....
(Probably should work on that thing when I get the chance)
....
(Now what should I say, what next...)
(Let me see...)
(Firstly, according to the title Hell Wants Her Back... which is self-explanatory, and meant to be taken literally... it's safe to think that they might have concluded that hell does indeed want someone. So they should be expecting to see the forces of Hell at play.)
And they—the forces of hell—will be, just not in this volume.
As of now, I'm planning to make two volumes: the first part focusing on events, and weaving the tales of people, each with their backstories, motives and intentions, tied down to the main plot and the story, and also answering all of their— your! — sorry, so sorry, I meant your...your questions...directly, and indirectly. And in volume two, I will start off with the life of whoever it is that Hell wants back, and her battle with Hell, along with her guardians and love interest.
(Sounds like a good idea, well. I was clear with that point, easy, very easy... too easy. Good job, Martin. Good job.)
(Now, What next, should I write?)
(Yes, that's right, they'd want to know if there's romance. Well, some of them. A large some of them.)
Concerning Romance, yes, there'll be in this first volume... slow, but very crucial. And no, it's not harem.
(Tell them about the possibilities, go on, tell them that they might be two, multiple—)
Shut up!
(... ... ... )
Ahem...
Also, very Important information before you begin reading, there's a huge, very huge possibility for an inclusion of same-sex romance, and if it's included, then there's a huger possibility that it's going to be a very important development in the story. Though, I'm choosing not to add the tag as that might not be the focus of the story, and I might also not explore the problem that comes with such relationships in depth.
(One more thing, its important you tell them. Warn them... tell, sorry, tell them. Go on... tell them)
ຸ
What?!!
(We don't want to start up some controversy now, do we?)
Shut up!
(... ... ...)
Also it is important you know that every name, practice, and belief in this book is solely of pure imagination. None of it is to be connected or taken as an answer to real life experiences. This includes the inclusion of the Christianity religion. It's important you know that despite the fact that a character might have been added to the Bible for the story's sake, it's solely for fiction and entertainment purposes. Do not put in mind or in consideration and try to connect any dots, when there are no dots to connect! Also, the practices of the nuns and priests do not reflect the practices of the Catholics, this is solely based on fiction. Emphasis on fiction.
(Nice one, very nice. Go on, now tell them about the witchy witchy things.)
And also, this book, while it may seem otherwise due to some reason, doesn't encourage the practices of witchcraft.
(Nice, very nice. Now... You sure you don't want to persuade them, tell them there'll enjoy it if they're the kind of reader that like adding the piece together. You sure, huh? You just might stop one person for leaving the book. Go on, tell them...
Wait a minute, one minute... don't say anything, not yet. Let me think of a good way to pharse it, so you don't come off as an arrogant prick just trying to hype his book....)
That being said, I'll stop here...
(WHAT! YOU CRAZY? WHAT YOU DOING? WHAT YOU DOING? WHAT YOU MEAN BY STOP HERE, YOU'VE BARELY SAID ANYTHING THAT WILL MAKE THEM READ YOUR PROLOGUE! )
...And let you start the book now. I do hope you have a good read, and you get to love, understand, cherish or hate the characters, and whatever emotions this book causes—tears, joy, fear, trauma or shock—I hope it's worth it.
Thanks...
(YOU CAN'T SERIOUSLY BE ENDING HERE! LET ME TALK TO THEM. COME ON, I WANT TO TALK TO THEM... TELL THEM THE THINGS THAT YOU DON'T HAVE THE GUTS TO SAY, THAT THEY SHOULD READ YOUR BOOK. AND THEY SHOULD LIKE IT— even if you're a terrible writer, and make sloppy mistakes-—THEY SHOULD LIKE IT EVEN IF THEY DON'T HAVE ANY REASON!
THEY SHOULD JUST LIKE IT BECAUSE YOU WROTE IT.
Gosh, what am I saying... I feel like an hypocrite... I don't even like your writing!)