CHAPTER 1
Don't find me weird. I already do for the both of us, trust me. But I have to admit there's something oddly satisfying about just being different then, but in an odd way, that maybe not everyone finds amusing. I walk into the tattoo shop and immediately I catch Telly's eyes. "Hey," I say to her excited.
"You ready?" she asks with a smile. I nod excitedly as I follow her to the back of her shop. There's fast rock and roll music playing at a low volume. It's a large room with cool artistic designs on the wall, snakes, dragons and tons of graffiti. Its also dark and there's all sorts of equipment around, then different types of chairs depending on what sort of position one needs to be in when getting their tattoo.
"Pretty cool ha," Telly says as she leads me to a normal chair, the kind you'd sit on if you were in an interrogation room with some crack ass detective shining light on your face. "So you just start?" I ask her excitedly.
"Not yet, I have to have you choose out a design first, what do you wanna get?"
I've been fixated on this word for a while, I always thought I'd get a tattoo of a snake, or scorpion, or like fish because I'm a Pisces. But the events of the recent years have gotten me rather fixated on this!
"Persona non grata." I tell her and she stares at me like I just spat on her face. "Come on, I thought I was gonna sit here and tattoo some sick ass design on your back and you're going with a string of words?"
"You could at least ask what it means if you're gonna be so judgy, Telena" I finish with her full name and she feigns a dramatic gasp. "Okay, what does it mean? Aide?" she drags out my name so dramatically I giggle. I look down for a moment and think, well am I going to blurt out my endless loneliness or give her an actual backstory.
"It means an unwelcome person, my personal interpretation includes feeling unwanted, and lonely, like constantly being around people but feeling an overwhelming sense of loneliness." I explained and looked up to find her staring at me as if my cat just died.
"Jeez, relax, it's not that deep Telly." I state quick to prevent her from taking it further with the sympathy act.
"Okay, fine, but that's some deep shit though," she says picking up her stencil and spirit.
I remove my top and bra and sit backward on the chair so that she has full access to my back.
~
My speed gains as the climbing lane becomes more even and soon I'm jogging on an even path that smoothens out where it joined the tarmacked road. Finally, my hamstrings could barely take it. So much for country runs, what motivates me to do this shit again. I stop for a quick stretch and the pain in my back reminds me why I had opted for cardio for the next two weeks rather than my usual gym routine. I was waiting for my back to heal from the tattoo I had on my spine trail. The pain was so fresh I thought I had gotten it yesterday. It had been four. I decided to walk out the rest of the trail home. I had run like seven miles already.
I had just slowed down my pace to a walk when suddenly I hear a splash and a very cold liquid comes into contact with my back save for the sports bra I was wearing. I cringed do quickly and turned to find a very, sorry not sorry, six foot whatever, hunk of a man staring down at me. "Excuse me?" I said up to him but he seemed dazed for a second.
"Hello?" I quipped waving in front of his face, that seemed to finally get his attention. He was dressed in sweatpants, no shirt and headphones, which were now being removed. He was also holding a coffee cup. Now who the fuck goes for a run with coffee? He must have read the judgement on my face and quickly rushed to apologize.
"I'm so sorry, I guess I got carried away. I was just coming back from my run and got some coffee….which is now, soaking on your back, I'm sorry, here. Let me…." He said reaching out his arm to touch me but I cringed and he stopped immediately. "I'm not trying to do anything I was just offering to dry the coffee I spilled on you."
Ow, of course he is, what's wrong with me? I silently nod and slowly turn my back to him. He pulls out a small towel out of his pocket, and starts to carefully wipe my back. He's so delicate with it I can barely feel it. Is it because of my tattoo, can he tell it's new, more importantly, does he know what it means? Probably not, most people actually thought that it's some lovey dovey Spanish shit so, I'll extend the same assumption for him.
It takes me a while to register that he's done. I look back and find him gently folding the towel and returning it to his pocket. Should I bother to thank him? It is his fault it's on me anyway. I reason. "I'm sorry," he says again and I nod in acceptance to his apology. A weird gap of silence stretches between us and I ask. "Is it cardio or are you training for the world championship marathon?"
It takes him a while to register the joke, when he finally does he smiles lightly and chuckles, "Nah, just some light cardio to get me back on my feet, I'm nursing an injury."
"Hey, me too," I said a bit too excitedly, then slowed down. "Well, not exactly an injury but….well, a fresh tattoo on my back, it kinda makes it hard for me to carry on with my usual body workout." I say and then wonder if that's TMI.
Like he's gonna care anyway, I'm never gonna meet him again, so fuck the first impression.
"I guess I better get going." I say, and start jogging away. I know I said I was gonna walk home but at the moment I just wanted to increase the distance between me and Mr. coffee spill there as much as possible. Does that mean I'm concerned about what he thinks about me. Did I panic? No. I just don't have the emotional bandwidth to be having actual conversations with men again. I consoled myself and continued my jog.