Prologue...,
Sakura's feet moved unintentionally, while the tail of her white wail on her right hand is dragged on the grass floor. After few dozen steps she saw the white bench where earlier she sat with Roshan with held hands and full on smiles to watch the sunrise. It is amazing to see how the promise to be together forever was broken so easily and meekly in just a couple minutes. she sat on the bench and the tears that she had been trying so hard to hold in came out flooding her eyes. she cried and shivered as the tears caved paths in her face washing down the make up, which the stylist tried so hard for hours to perfect. the world she dreamt to be a reality a while ago is now seems to be a dream which will never be able to make into a reality anymore...with that realization hit her ,her mind went blank with all of the pain of regret that was caused by just one wrong choice.
Sakura has been trying her hardest for her whole life for a single goal, getting to a certain company in Australia. but now that goal is going further away. her eyes turned towards the floor.
"why? why me?" that was the first thing that she asked herself, while the cool breeze of the morning atmosphere ,her body tensed and shivered because of the cold.
As she began to think back of her life ,she remembered of all the hardships that she had to endure to reach her goal, but now the goal was almost on reach and suddenly she had to go back to where she started. It was like in a snake and ladder game, when you are at the 98 square and jumps onto the next one only to be eaten by a snake that had its fangs ready to devour you ,in an earlier point it would at least be easier to make up your mind, and keep moving forward but now it was like the flag of victory is waving right in front of you but you can do nothing more than stare it from down while falling to an endless pit of defeat.
Sure, it must have hurt to realize that the groom of the wedding left you right on the verge of wedding, but to Sakura losing her goal to a success future and realizing that all the sacrifices she made along the way were useless hit harder than a meekly love story..
"what shall I do now?" that was the only question remained on her mind after few more disturbingly long seconds.
Chapter 1...,
I was sitting in front of the ceremony hall, looking at the fancy people getting out of their fancy cars in their fancy dresses, I mean don't get me wrong I don't hate rich people, (but I feel like I am starting to.) I am not really a fan of fancy their personalities .If I have to be exact I would say that I hate their guts.
To say why I am out here ,instead of being inside that air conditioned hall while eating a pudding... Oh it's a long story, but let me start by just a sentence. I am on scout for the bride. yes,, 'The Bride' one of the most important people of two in a wedding, gone, nowhere to be found and who is supposed to go to keep an eye out at the entrance...'yeah let's send the one person who is neither a relative of groom nor the bride.'
Yeah, My name is Prabhath . I am a friend of Dulmi (bride's younger sister).now you might be wandering why would they send just a friend to look for the bride. All because of my father, he take relationships way too seriously than they should be. I mean why would I look for her, stuff like this should be left to family, I was going to directly refuse when my dad found me in the wedding hall near the dessert table, he was panicked like all hell had broken loose,
And after few seconds he leaned in and whispered in my ear "Sakura is gone." my first reaction was "what?". then he dragged me out of the wedding hall and turned right ,to a stair case which leads to the bride's dressing room and he told me what happened.
Apparently the dressing room was supposed to be only occupied by a very few close members of the family,(then what was my dad doing there? yeah as I told you he take these stuff way seriously.) however in the room there was aunty Rashmika and Dulmi ,and in the outside was uncle Waranath and my dad. but since something came up with the music band my dad and uncle came to the entrance to talk it out, and few minutes later aunty had to come to resolve it herself. (Yeah talk about being useless), and Dulmi went to the toilet after helping her sister put on the wail. And when they returned the room was empty. (yes ,exactly like a Hindi drama).
My dad told me to wait in front of the exit and entrance of the hall while he go and talk to the security at the gate about the bride. And I was told to keep an eye out ,if by any chance she comes out. Few more minutes and my dad returned and the look on his face was enough to me to understand he failed.
" I told him to contact us if he saw her. But I don't know whether he will be able to notice her, That guy is pretty old ,I seriously doubt whether he can even see"
"don't worry dad ,you said she is wearing her wedding dress, right? even a half blind man would notice that .now what?"
dad seemed worried as it is his bride who disappeared, come on man, Don't look that worried, you would even make me worry.
"I will just go and tell Rashika about this ,she must be worried sick"
Dad always considered aunt Rashika as his sister, with no strings. I mean they wouldn't even know each other, if I and Dulmi were not classmates in primary school. He looks so worried, This is why I always thinks that relationships are a bother, but if there is anything that I care for in this world it is my dad.
"I will come with you dad"
Dad and I started running towards the door of the ceremony hall building ,and while passing the wedding hall I saw through the opened doors that the guest were starting to settle in, we would have to find the bride within an hour or things would turn into chaos. I heard the smooth jazz music while climbing the majestic stairs two at a time beside my dad. at least the issue with the band was resolved if all goes south we could drown in tune.
At the door of the bride's dressing room , dad stopped and knocked.
"who is it?" a muffled and blurred voice came out from the room.
"it's me, Asanka. Prabha is also with me."
The door opened, Dulmi was there her face was also pale and her eyes seems red, she has been crying as it seems. Dad and I went in.
"so anything?" uncle Waranath asked his face was also a bit pale.
"she has not seen by the security" dad said nodding his face sideways.
I looked around the room ,and it seems a bit untidy , There were too much make up lying on the tables and there were mirrors everywhere. and on a sofa beside the big mirror aunty Rashika was sitting her face was on her hands,(that is not good I have seen her facing many troubles, most of the time she was angry and beaming aura, but never sad or worried, everyone around her respected and looked up to her, she helped me get up when I was down in the dump so many times )I took a few steps towards her and when I got closer I realized that she was crying, right down of where her face was ,on her lap ,there was a big wet stain on her blue saree, her tears.
I always considered relationships to be pain in the ass, but this woman never gave up trying to make me her family, she was always there for me when I was alone. I have never experienced the love of a mom, the closest thing to a mom I had was her, Even I would not stoop so law to ignore someone like that.
I took another step and put a hand on aunt Rashika's shoulder. She stopped crying for a moment and looked up, her make up was messed up.
"don't worry we will find her, this wedding won't be ruined, but you have to stay strong ,aunty. as you always said to me 'never give up, never falter' I won't .And we need you here, so please try to get yourself together" I said to her to reassure her, and signed Dulmi to look after her by nodding my head.
Even if I said all that ,what am I gonna do? I am not a magician, If I want to do something I need more info, All I know now is that the bride is gone and she...she haven't left the building..! has she?,
"Dulmi, where is Sakura's phone?"
"wait, here .but why ?" Dulmi asked while giving me the phone.
"I will explain later. do you know the passcode?"
"yeah I think it's her birth year"
"ok.2001" I typed and it opened ,I checked the call log first there were 8 or nine calls registered by the name 'mom', it was aunt rashika's number.
"why did you call this much times?"
"uh.... we could not find the phone, it was on silence mode, Dulmi found it later under that sofa." Aunt Rashmika said in between her tears while pointing at the sofa.
I scrolled down and saw a about five or so calls to Roshan, the groom. as it seems the first one was answered and they have talked for a minute or two and any of the other calls were not answered, and the last few calls were all taken within one minute. So as it seems the first call was the problem.
"hey uncle ,do you know where the security room is? I meant where the footages of CCTV might be?"
"yeah ,I think it's beside the parking lot ,it's connected to the building. but we already asked the security to look for Sakura."
"yes, that we did. But this time we are not looking for the bride, we are looking for the Groom. can you do that uncle?"
"yes, but why?" uncle waranath looked totally confused.
"just trust me on this okay. And Dulmi .." I turned to my oldest friend, "you have a job too."
"what ?" Dulmi seems to be restless to help. might be because she might blame herself for leaving Sakura alone.
"every woman's washroom .check them. don't leave any of them .I think there are at least three on the facility. are you clear?" I asked ,I don't want her to run wild but this something only she can do.
"o-ok ..sure" Dulmi agreed.
"and dad ,this is a bit delicate thing, but you will be perfect for it, go to the groom's dressing room and don't tell anyone Sakura's missing, and check what is going on there. and Dulmi can join you after she checked the bathrooms. don't interfere nor interact under any circumstances. Are you clear?" I asked my dad. and he nodded.
"what about me? what should I do? Should I wait here?" Aunt Rashika asked ,there was a bit tension in her voice but she seemed to be doing better than before.
"yes. I think you should ,after all she might return, so everyone roll out, and if you find Sakura relay the info, ok " I watched as the three people on the verge of a breakdown went out to find the bride.
I sat beside aunty and my mind started going berserk about the heavy choices that I just made .
'what if I am wrong again? Even I won't forgive myself if they were wrong. beside all that who am I to make such bold choices in someone else's problem? god this is exhausting I wonder if this is how my dad feels every time he tries to help others.... If it was me I would've quit a long time ago. My fingers started typing on my thigh, it was a habit I picked up ,Always when I am nervous I do this ,but this time the typing was so fast that it started to hurt my own fingers, and I closed my eyes to calm myself ,but as it doesn't seems to be working, I mean why am I even doing this? This is not even my problem? to be truthful I don't even like Sakura that much ,out of all of her family members she felt the most distant, sure we talked and hung out as a group but with her I never felt the warmth I felt with the others. I am not complaining, I mean I would've done the same, who would accept a complete stranger into their family, so why am I even trying to shoulder all of her worries on me? If any of this goes wrong I would be the one to take blame'
as those suspicions hit me my head was heavy, the typing on my thigh started getting faster and faster, until I felt a warm hand on my dancing fingers, as it wrapped around my hand I began to rest ,my nervousness went away, and as I opened my eyes ,aunt Rashika was looking at me. the earlier tension on her face was much relieved now, and I realized the answer to 'why I am doing all this?'.
"thank you ,son. If not for you ,we might have already broke down, don't worry you did what you could." aunt Rashika said with a calm face...
huh....As it seems she took my earlier advice too seriously, she was back to her past self ,reliable as always .and I might not care about Sakura as much as everyone else, but she does ,I took a look at aunt Rashika's face. As long as the people who cares about me are worried. I would try to solve their problems. and it is not a time for me to sit idle while others are standing this strong, I stood up.
"stay here aunty." I went out the room and started thinking while leaned on the door. and I called uncle Waranath,
"hello ,Prabha .what is it ? did you find her?" uncle's voice was restless and too loud for the phone, I had to move the phone away from my ear for a second to adjust.
"calm down uncle, I didn't yet. Are you in the security control room?"
"yes I am ,Prabha"
"ok there might be a map of the faculty or the building there ,check" I heard him asking someone beside him about it. probably a security officer.
" yes there is son.so what do you want me to do?"
"take a picture and send it to me, you know how to do it, right?"
"oh, yeah yeah okay, Yes I know s-s-Sakura taught me" his voice altered for when he was saying her name.
"ok then send it, fast." I cut the call and while waiting for the photo of map ,my mind reeled back to the past that I was trying my best to forget. How I isolated myself from human connection and interaction, It was all because of the woman that gave and took the living breath out of my life, my Mom. just when my mind drowned in those regretting memories I heard the 'click' of my phone, implying the new message, and that noise dragged my mind back to present and my eyes to the screen. I tried to find somewhere she would go to escape from whatever she was trying to escape, if it was me where would I go?... yeah.. that is not gonna fly is it? she is completely different from me. where would she go? I forced my mind to overwork, If I am not gonna be able to find where she would go, I will find where she can go.. it has to be somewhere she already know and most probably has been ,so try ..think ..think .. that might be the only thing you are good at think,... I kept shouting to myself in my head... and suddenly it hit me. when they came to practice the surprise dance ,I heard something about photoshoot,...! that was why they chose here , yes exactly. I take a few seconds to see where the place is and a way to get to there on the map, and started walking down the stairs, but why is she there and the phone calls.. something bad happened....! oh it's not good.. Before realizing I was running at full speed and just when I reached the ground floor I ran behind to the staircase and saw the door ,It was marked as staff only.. I yanked it open and saw the other not so majestic but small iron staircase which went straight to the top floor.
I started climbing it as fast as I can. every time my polished black shoes hit the staircase it made a sound ,'clank' 'clank' 'clank' .I was freaking out, how could I not see this earlier, that time when she said why they chose this exact wedding hall,
"It's because of the rooftop, It is specially made for photoshoots, It's gorgeous, and we will be able to take a photo with sunrise as the background" she was happy, as always shining brighter as the sun. If I paid more attention I could have..... but I never came out to light, I always thought of myself as a background character.
My steps were desperate, my mind was reeling with bad things that she could have done or doing to herself even now, not because I cared about her though, solely because of the promise I made to my savior, the staircase seems to be absurdly longer ,my feet unimaginably heavier, I began shouting in my mind 'don't do anything stupid ,Sakura.' not for you but for me, I will keep my promise....!
I opened the door while my breathing was ragged, sweat was dripping from my forehead ,I had to wait a few moments for my eyes to get used to the direct sunrise. when finally I was able to see, I saw her sitting across the rooftop on a white bench in her wedding dress, It was like a panel out of a manga. An lonely princess waiting for her knight in a shining armor to come and rescue her, she was gorgeous, the morning sunlight softly bathed her skin, she looked like she was an angel from heaven, but the face that was looking down on her legs and her broken like pose told me 'It may look like the princess is sunbathing on her palace top, but she actually is rotting in a dark dungeon' I apologized in my mind 'sorry Sakura I ain't no knight ,in anytime else I would have waited for anyone else to come and rescue you from your dark dungeon, but we don't have the time for it.so please just for today consider me a cheap replacement.
I began walking across the grassy floor towards her, still mist covered grass drew strains on my shoes as I stepped towards the still rainy mist background highlighted by the still rising sun. As I closed the distance my pace lowered, Sakura turned her head and looked at me, I think she was a bit surprised too, again sorry for not being able to live up to your expectations. I realized what a mistake I had made by coming there only when I got there 'I had absolutely nothing to say, not even a greeting, I mean what do I say? huh, "hey ,how you doin?" Jesus 'I silently sat beside her on the bench.
"huh.... got to say Prabha, you were the one I least expected to come here for me."
"yeah yeah I know, I am only because of aunt Rashika. don't get the wrong idea, I remember what you told me... I ain't gonna play your little brother. Anyhow what are you doing here all alone. Isn't it a too late for secret meetings with your lovey-dovey boyfriend."
she let out a big sigh." you sure know how to push people's buttons, don't ya?, let me ask you something Prabha, I have a feeling that you might not have an answer for it, but just tell me okay ".
"yeah go on " what wouldn't I have an answer, I am one of the brightest and wisest guys you could ever met, I have read hundreds of books. so ask away...
"has a girl ever confessed her feelings to you?"
Damn.... that... that wasn't in any of the hundred books I had read.
"really, Sakura, Do I look like a guy who's ever had a girl confessed her feelings to him?" why does she had to poke where it hurts ,man.
"yeah I knew it..."
"so what of it?"
"You know... I wasn't the one who confessed first, it was him. at first I rejected him cold hearted, but eventually I... I gave in" many girls do this ,as I heard ,alright? I got no experience in this regards, so don't judge me, okay? but the fact is remained to be truthful ,as I sees it, what a guy needs to make a girl his girlfriend is not any of the things that the society nowadays think, it isn't really about money or looks, I mean sure they do have a somewhat effect on the process but after all it just comes down to a single aspect and that is PERSISTENCE. I have seen this a couple times ,at first many girls don't even consider a boy worthy of their attention ,but the boy keeps pressing and never gives up ,he shows up in everywhere ,until his face is etched to the girl's retina. and eventually the boy becomes a regular in the girl's life, and after that the earlier consideration of worth fades away, and then it might become a friendship or an acquaintance or some other thing like that ,and it gradually blooms into a what they calls a romantic relationship.
"so why am I the one to be dumped at the altar, huh, to begin with I never asked for any of this" now she is just being silly, I mean it's completely acceptable for marriage couples to have small fights but this is not the time for it, goddammit.
before I could talk she let out an another big sigh. I could even see the warm breath in the cold atmosphere." he is gone." her voice suddenly became serious and law. she seems desperate. and I seems to have completely diagnosed the problem correctly, but I was more than happy to be wrong this time, because if what I thought is right ,This is gonna be a long day.
"tell me clearly, I know you don't trust me ,I am not asking you to. but if there is anything wrong I would try to help you, I have given your mom my word." as I finished she raised and hold her hand out to me, she was holding a paper. I took it out of her hand, and flattened it on my thigh and started to read. few spots were blurred and wet. I started reading ,It started...
Sakura,
I know this cannot be excused but just know that I had to and I am very sorry for leaving you. I have a reason that I can't reveal. But I will say this much, It was a request I couldn't decline. My past that I thought was dead finally caught up to me, If I remained and dragged you into this mess, It would've devoured you too, I don't know whether you'll believe me or not but my love for you was real. So I would die rather than getting you caught up in this mess, so even with sadness and desperation to cling onto you I will let you go.. this is a good bye, Sakura. I wish all the happiness in the world to you.
Please don't blame my family, they don't know any of this. You are the only person ,I even informed with this letter. I am sorry for every thing again. I never meant to get you caught up in this. please don't try to find me. You can't...
-Roshan-
"wow a real gentleman." I said, actually this is absurd ,the handwriting was too neat to be written in a haste and definitely this letter was a well thought one, there is no way someone can write this letter to the girl he was going to marry if he really was worried. "he even went out of his way to write a letter, wow.... real romantic"
"so what do you think, Prabha?"
"why are you asking me? I don't know, what to say. but I will say only this, It was a good thing you didn't marry this guy. he seems to be neck deep in some shit"
"You really got no delicacy do ya? who talk to a bride like that on her wedding day?"
"yeah.... about that what are you going to do?"
"I don't know. right now I got no allies. this whole marriage was forced only by me and Roshan. we knew if anything goes bad the whole blame would go straight to us. but apparently I was in love and when he said 'don't worry honeycomb. we will be able to bear anything if we were together.' I believed it. Now that I think about it .it's just cringe, isn't it?"
"what the honeycomb part or the whole love sentiment?" I asked. in this kind of moment any other girl would be crying her eyes out, but Sakura ain't that. she is smart and strict when it comes to regulations. she would have act all innocent and cute in front of others ,but in front of me ,she has no reason to put up a front, she doesn't care what the others might think as long as it doesn't make it an obstacle to her goal.
"not funny ,Prabha. "
"Yeah yeah okay, Just do what you want to do, like you always did."
"like I always did, huh, I don't think I have the right anymore"
Sakura's faced downwards, I couldn't see her face ,but I knew what kind of look she had, she always used to move forwards, without looking back, she always overcame her own mistakes by her own. I think it's because she never had any doubt or regret about her choices, but this time her wrong choice not only affect her life but her family too, of course she would have a hard time deciding what to do next.
"hmmmm...yes it seems to be that way, but why do you think you have no right?"
"what?,.. don't you see the mess I am in right now? it's all my fault.... how will I make a decision when...?" she began to cry while hiding her face between her palms.
oh.. great now I have to console her, come on, I didn't sign up for this. but I couldn't just watch.
"yeah yeah you have made a huge mistake, that is pretty messed up, but... at this moment you are the only person who can make it right, revise it to normal and you are the only person that might be able to save your family from this mess, so I don't think you have the time to be crying on the rooftop " with that I stood up, "so what now?"
I looked at her ,Sakura might have realized what I meant, I really hope she does, because I don't know what else I can say. she stood up and wiped her face with the back of her palms. and looked straight at me.
"we have a wedding to ruin. you said that you will help me right? no matter what I decide?" oh, hell no ,ma'am. I don't like the way you said that whatever you decide part, this is why my mind thought at that moment but, when Sakura looked at me with those teary, big puppy eyes I melted, yeah I know.. alright! I have been acting all mighty and manly but just when some girl looked and asked for my help I melted...
"yeah... I gave my word to you, whatever you decide I will help you." dammit .now that I think about it this was the worst decision I could have taken.
"okay cool" hearing my answer a little smug grin drew in her mouth, I had this terrible feeling of regret about the choice I made, she always had that smile when was goin to do something unexpectedly cunning." do you have my phone by any chance?"
"yeah here you go" I took her phone out of my pocket and gave it to her.
"I got some calls to make. after that I will come with you to the dressing room" she said to me as she steps a bit further to make the call. and I had some calls to make too, I first called dad.
"hey, dad. I found her. But there seems to be some problems, did you checked groom's room?"
"no , the best men didn't let me get in. they said everything is alright though, but I feel like that is not the truth."
"yeah, I know, I will explain later, you can stop what you are doing and go to the dressing room ,I will bring Sakura with me ,just give me few minutes. we still got about half an hour right?"
"yeah yeah, be careful. I will call Dulmi and Waranath back to the dressing room too ,if it's okay?"
"ah...yes... go ahead, dad" to be honest I had forgotten about the plan, thank gods my dad is with me.
As I turned back I saw that Sakura is also done with her call and stepping towards me, now she had her calm and cold exterior as always she had with me ,which means she is back to normal.. or her usual, I don't whether it can be called normal.
"done?"
"yeah I just called the company to confirm something, now I only have to make a few people convince." I really didn't like the way she said that, it almost sounded like threatening some people.
"okay.. you can do whatever you have to do after I return you to your mom" I really wanted nothing more, I am just a chill guy who likes to avoid trouble. "shall we go back then?"
"yeah let's go" after she agreed I took the lead ,and Sakura followed, however after the call she made she looked like she is fighting for something, 'Move not until you see an advantage, use not your troops unless there is something to be gained, fight not until the position is critical' that is a quote by Sun Tzu, a Chinese strategist . so I really hope Sakura has a valuable reason to fight for...
we climbed down the staircase together and I first went ahead to see whether there is someone outside before taking Sakura outside of the room and onto the staircase which leads to the bride's dressing room. and after few minutes of struggling we managed to sneak through the incoming guests and close to the dressing room. and just when I put my hand on the door knob Sakura grabbed my other hand ,she was shaking, ' I mean yes of course she would be, she is going to have to go into a room full of her family members (who never agreed to this wedding) tell them that her groom ran away. it's a given she would be afraid.
"don't worry ,Sakura. I don't know what you have decided or what the others might say, but I know this the people in their ,your family they will definitely understand you, the world might not, but does it really matter what the society or your high class relatives think, they never even cared about you at the first place, but your family does, in my idea as long as the people you care about and the ones who care about you knows and understand what you are ,that's the only thing matters."
Sakura looked at me after a few moments and nodded signing me to open the door, and we both stepped in, the full cast was there, my dad, Dulmi, aunt Rashika, uncle Waranath. all of their faces lit up when they saw Sakura, and for a few minutes the room was full with the weepings and welcomes and all those warm feelings ,so I stepped away from the ball of emotions and sat on the chair as far as I could. many people would consider this a heartwarming moment, but to me it was all about a mistake a girl made and the easygoing family forgiving her.
"hurry up Saku. you should get your make up ready again. we don't have much time left" Rashika aunty told Sakura as it seems she was still oblivious about Roshan's disappearing. I mean no one except for me knew.
And after listening to Sakura's brief explanation about it the room became dead silent, Aunt Rashika fell onto the sofa ,her face had a look of regret and hopelessness.
"so what do we do?" Dulmi asked after few minutes, breaking the ice.
The different people in the room had few ....offers. uncle Waranath was dead set on finding Roshan back and continue the wedding, while my father said that it was not fair to Sakura to marry her into Roshan. Dulmi was whispering with Sakura, I couldn't exactly hear what they were talking but my theory was Dulmi is still trying to grasp the situation. aunt Rashika was silent the whole time but finally when she talked she asked the most crucial question that should have been asked.
"what do you want to do, Saku?"
This whole incident and the decision of all these arguements could shatter with one word out of Sakura ,she is the prime figure at this game right now ,all that really matters is her opinion at the end. all heads turned to Sakura for the answer.
"the wedding will continue." her answer surprised us all, but it was a given to just not disregard all the preparations they went through and let the effort go to waste, but is was a bit hard for me to see Sakura giving up her policies of never yielding for just money. but uncle Waranath seemed satisfied.
"so we should hurry up and find Roshan, let's go." he signed me and dad. but as soon as I stood up, Sakura said something else.
"wedding will continue, but I am not marrying Roshan." now that was a surprise, the room erupted to chaos.
"what do you mean ,Sakura?" my dad asked completely dumbfounded.
" just as I said the wedding will continue ,but I am not marrying Roshan, "
"do you have someone in mind beside Roshan" Dulmi asked teasingly, like she didn't believe that Sakura is really meaning what she is saying.
"Yes I do" that answer from Sakura shattered Dulmi as she was not expecting it, her eyes widened and she asked the hundred dollar question," who?"
But what happened next was the real twist that none of us expected, especially me. Sakura pointed at me." my dear Prabhath." her voice made the whole room silent .everyone was dumbstruck, I had a little heart attack.
The next few minutes were blurred in my mind but I slightly remember being bombarded with questions. then I heard sakura asking everyone to stop and told them all to get out for a few minutes. and I felt she sitting beside my chair in a stool.
"aren't you gonna ask why?" Sakura took the first step as always.
"what do you mean 'aren't you gonna ask why?' of course I am gonna ask you why? I mean I do understand that you don't want to marry Roshan ,so why not just cancel this wedding?"
"hmmm.... ok ok don't shout, I can't cancel this wedding , because I need this."
"need this to what, I heard that next week you are going to Australia for a job. so why would you need this wedding if you are not even doing it for....you know, your love or anything?" I tried to lay logic as I knew in front of her. but her answers shattered it.
"love....? huh you mean what me and Roshan had, and yet he seemed no hesitant to leave me hanging. Is that love?" she asked me ,she had a bitter smile when she asked me that. but I realized that it was indeed a smile in pain.
"uh... that certainly isn't love, I am aware of that but you will find someone who you can truly be with without feeling any kind of restraint or distrust." I kept trying to reason with her ,but a part of me new this girl was not someone who would do this kind of thing in regard of emotion. there has to be a logic.
"what do you mean by love?" she asked me, a question that no one was ever answered without interfering their own beliefs or experiences.
Love is relative, more than anything, as much as happiness. Each of us live dependent and bound by our individual knowledge and awareness, all that is what we call reality. however, both knowledge and awareness are equivocal one's reality might be one's illusion, same can be told in other way. when dismissed all and every other limits we can tell that we all live inside our own FANTASIES.
This was the answer that I somewhat had but I couldn't tell her this ,could I? this is basically accepting defeat. so I kept my silent.
"no answer huh? wow I never thought you would not have an answer for one of my questions. this indeed is a weird day. I mean you are the genius that shines as they tell right? "
"I never liked that nickname as you know, Sakura. never mind that tell me, why are you going through with this drama.?"
"as you said you are aware of the job I got right?" she asked me ,and I nodded in approval." the company I was going to join is named Queens group, I applied for the vacancy of a graphic designer, this was kind of my dream from childhood, I applied for the job in January, and I got an answer right away, but there were few complications. I was not permitted to go abroad alone."
"what? which company puts up that kind of weird rules?"
"not the company ,you knucklehead .seriously why would they call you a genius? my mom restricted me to go abroad alone, since I am a girl and blah. blah. blah."
knowing Aunt Rashika she might have put this rule exceptionally for Sakura since she is aware of her daughters idiocy, but I yet again kept my mouth silent, because I didn't want to lose my teeth without a proper reason.
"so, you decided to charm Roshan and convince him to marry you so you both could go abroad, got it." as soon as I told it ,she rang my head like a bell.
ouch ouch. no wonder Roshan left her, she is violent like a thug.
"I was already in a relationship with Roshan, and when I told him about this he immediately agreed," 'you fool' I thought but he got away.
"so you need someone to marry to get this job? am I right?"
"yeah"
"I got the easiest answer to all your problems. FIND ANOTHER JOB"
"seriously,? that's all you have to say, I am seriously starting to doubt your intellect"
"why do you keep implying I am some kind of genius, I am not a genius ,okay. stop that." that was something I hated, calling someone genius and hoping that their aim would never alter, that really puts a lot of pressure on the person, if he do something right, all people say is 'oh it's expected of him, he is the genius' but if you went one step wrong there would be hundreds of people ready to laugh and judge you for being wrong or failing despite being the so called genius.
"oops sorry if I hit a nerve princess. I was dead set on having this job my entire life and just when it was at the grasp of my hand it seemed impossible to take it. I am frustrated if I let this chance slip I might never even have a chance. that is why I need this marriage. now are you satisfied? huh , are you fine of hearing my tale?" she finished with a little tease .
"ok everything is fine ,but there is one thing, that is bugging my mind. WHY ME? huh? what did I do to deserve this? I never agreed to this circus play, marrying the bride of another man in front of the man's whole family! they will hang me or drag me on the street, or they will do both."
"that alone is a good enough reason."
"what ?"
"seeing you dragged along the road"
"don't joke. tell me .why did you choose me when you could choose one of your friends, or.. or some idiot who had a crush on you?"
"I mean after all you did tell me that you will help me on whatever I decide"
"what ? when?"
"on the rooftop a few minutes ago" shit, I knew that it would come to bite me on the butt sooner or later, but I never imagined it would be this quick. lord save me!
"or are you gonna go back on your word? you almost looked like a man at the moment you said it" she looked at me with that smug expression.
"I told you that I would help you, but now you are asking me to take a big leap. and much important matter what do you mean by almost?"
"that is the exact reason I choose you, there is no one in my life more suitable for this task than you, you are important enough, not related, young, and stupidly loyal to my mom"
"a deadly combo isn't it?"
"and trust me you don't have to keep this marriage going more than necessary, I mean I am not asking you to fall in love with me. this is just a facade to make my mom acknowledge my trip to australia, and after I secure the job you can divorce me. You too have many ups in this agreement, you get to go abroad, you can have something like a vacation"
"ok," I replied.
"ok? that's it?" she was surprised, I mean she would be, she must have expected some more of objection out of me, but I had already realized that she is not choosing me out of spite, it might be the best choice for her, I am not bragging but I am a guy who don't like to get in trouble. and if I just agreed to be her groom for a period, we would both be benifitted she more than me ,but this is better than nothing.
"yeah I mean it's not like I would be able to change your mind , no one before could at anything, right? " Sakura always gets what she wants one way or another. so if it was me , I would like to not involve in anything, but....
"I really expected you to refuse more, now it's like you liked or rather waited for this chance."
"I did, actually I was waiting for a chance"
"what?", she seemed panicked. "are you in love with me or anything like that? don't tell me."
"what? no I meant I don't give a damn about your wedding or job. but I was waiting or rather looking for a way into a foreign country."
"ohh... yeah, for a moment I really regretted my decision of making you the replication of Roshan."
"I don't really mind going alone with this ruse of yours but... do you really think that your mom and family would agree to this?" I really hoped this would be stopped in my mind, since I would not be able to refuse her, if I tried to refuse her she would find some other much more gory way to convince me, so my last hope was my dad and Sakura's family to break here mind.
"yeah if it was you they would not disagree" I didn't like the sound of that one bit. Sakura opened the door and let everyone who were waiting in. and they were dying to hear the explanation to all this mess.
"so explain, Prabha." Rashika aunty told me.
'I mean seriously why me?. I am not to blame here. it was all your daughter. I wanted to tell. but before I could answer Sakura interfered.
"no, prabhath don't have to explain anything mom, I chose him, After I told him, that Roashan fled. Prabha was the one comforted me. he told me that he would stand beside me and face my problems with me," hey, I never told that, that's so cheesy. I stared at Sakura to tell her to stop, but she had a plan of her own as it seems.
"if only he agreed, he can solve all of this problems by his own, I know that this may come wrong but, I think Prabha had a huge crush on me for so long ." oh ,hell no ,girl. this is going too far, but after agreeing to all that earlier, if I now talked and told no, everyone might think that I am really in love with Sakura, and trying to cover it. if I just kept quiet it would mean I am accepting her sayings. damn she got me in a deadlock, now I can't play any of my cards. the only thing to do is waiting for someone to disagree to this devious plan.
my dad was the first to talk, " I never intended Prabha to marry this quick, and neither I nor Prabha has ever thought about Sakura a suitable match, I mean not because of any faults or anything but because I personally considered you as my own daughter and I think Prabha too considered you as his own sister" yes ,dad keep going ,in my mind I motivated my dad, give her a no. if you did none of this will move forward.
"but" my dad continued. why but? "if you both have love for each others and ready to move forward, who am I to say no?" what ?no no you are my father, you can say no.. please say no. I stared at my dad. he saw my look and his expression changed a bit. yes that's it dad, read my face, is it a happy one? no. understand your son's feelings and say no.
"oh, Prabha you don't have to be that concerned, I know that you love me, I will accept this marriage don't worry" I was at a lost of words, damn dad. well done, why was I a fool to expect you to reject this, I really wanted to hit myself .
but I regained my mind. I still got at least two more people who can stop this. the weakest link might be uncle Waranath. 'he would never agree to marry off her elder daughter to a slob like me' I thought as he stepped towards me, he is gonna slap me, ain't he? he was always an emotional fool ,but if it could I would gladly take a stab to my stomach. so a slap is nothing, I hardened my body, but instead of slapping me he hugged me.
"thank you son, I knew that just from the moment you once saved Sakura from that truck you loved her. I was waiting. glad you got the girl you loved son." oh... I am surrounded by idiots, that incident happened two or three years ago. I won't go to details but... I will tell you this that was nothing sort of romantic like you see in movies.
I changed my target ,she might be the only sane target on the room. please aunt Rashika save me like you always do. She stood up, like she heard my plea.
"ok, then that decides it, come on Prabha let's go to the groom's room."
Even I was surprised to see that kind of reaction from aunt Rashika, "wait.... hey.." I tried to reason but she was already out of the room, I think others also have found it very surprising since no one followed us ,but I was after aunt Rashika and when I tried to talk she silenced me with a hand and asked me to follow her silently, and I obeyed.
At the last step of the stairs she stopped and looked at me. like she always used to when I and Dulmi were kids.
"you must have lot of questions right, son?"
"well yeah, I do."
"ask away, I will answer at my best" aunt Rashika was always like this when we were in a problem, she never panicked ,never wavered. Unless the problem was a one like this ,I don't know whether it was because she was a women or anything but she was weak when it comes to emotional matters, and matters concerning her kids future. this time she had a combo of both of them.
"why didn't you say anything. I didn't hear you disagree. or even talk."
"you hoped me to disagree?"
"yeah I mean I can understand my dad or uncle going along this crazy plan because they can't see two steps ahead, they won't understand the consequences even if I explained them but you... why? I need to know" she was the person I idolized and someday hoped to surpass. as I heard she came from nothing and built an empire like business alone, even before she married.
"huh.... I thought of stopping the marriage, I really don't care about the opinions of the lot in there" she pointed at the guest hall,
'fair enough, I mean as they say A lion doesn't concern himself with the opinion of the sheep' as Tywin Lannister would say.
"but as it seems Sakura is dead set in going abroad and I think she took a gamble in that regard, she chose you as her last resort, she knew if it was you the chance of getting my approval would be positive, she was right, I mean if she tried she could easily convince one cheesy fool in there to marry her ,he would be much easier to convince and control than trying to handle you, but..." she stopped halfway and looked at me as if telling me to finish her sentence.
"but she would never get the consent from you."
"exactly"
that bitch she was thinking few steps ahead from the moment I found her on the rooftop, I mean the way she acted all sad and pathetic made me think that Sakura also just a girl when it comes to stuff like this. but no matter how thicker lamb skin it covers itself with the wolf is ,was and always will be a wolf. damn how could I be so foolish.
"so why did you agree aunty, if you saw it just from the start why did you let her do as she liked. what advant..... ohhhh" I realized the reason that might be aunty didn't disagreed or interfered with Sakura's decision for choosing me as her new groom.
"yeah it seemed you finally understood, I thought as smart as you is you already realized this, but the pressure of a situation like this would even cloud the judgement of someone like you too"
"so you too used me, wow. that is a twist even I couldn't imagine"
"used you.. no no, my dear child I wouldn't go that far. I never intended to use you, but Sakura gave me a radiant choice, you are the only one I trust enough to handle her.... craziness. and if you were with her the whole time in this abroad job, I would feel much more relaxed, she knew that ,and she decided to take the gamble .she is very cocky for a girl in her age, but she certainly is not as feeble girl as I thought she would be, so here I ask you, my dear boy. would you do this for me?"
I took a moment to think, and I had a laugh at myself, I got played by both daughter and the mother, and now the mother gives me a choice to either hold the daughter's reins or run away, huh, amusing. I don't like this, I know even now aunty is trying to provocate me into bite the bait, but after getting deceived and played I can't turn away defeated, after all I am a man and a man's got to have pride. I know in my full sense that I would regret this and still I won't and can't back away in the face of such tantalizing challenge.
"Fine aunty, I will marry Sakura" I said.
'I will play along for your little game for now Sakura, but you will realize that you chose the wrong guy to play with very very soon...!'