Aiden Lee woke up the next morning to find a goat chewing on his sleeve.
He blinked blearily, sat up, and yanked the cloth away. "Hey! Personal space! I don't do collabs without contracts!"
The goat bleated, chewed, and looked entirely unrepentant. Aiden rubbed his eyes, yawning. His HUD still glowed faintly at the corner of his vision.
Influence SystemFollowers: 118Quest: Protect the Village from Goblin RaidTime Remaining: 5 days
Five days. Aiden groaned. "Five days until goblins… no pressure."
He rolled off the straw mat, nearly tripping on the goat. The animal bleated and headbutted his shin. He winced. "Ow! Okay, okay, I get it. Content waits for no man."
Outside, the villagers were already gathering in the square, kneeling in neat rows. They looked expectant, hungry — not for food, but for words. For miracles. For content.
Aiden straightened, puffing out his chest. Showtime.
"Oracle of Likes!" cried the old matron. "Bless us with today's wisdom!"
Aiden coughed into his fist, mind blank. He hadn't written a script. He hadn't prepared bullet points. Back on Earth, he'd spent hours brainstorming clickbait titles. Now, he had to improvise with his literal survival on the line.
He raised one hand dramatically. "Uh… consistency is key!"
The villagers gasped.
"Consistency… key?" whispered a farmer.
"Yes," Aiden continued, rolling with it. "Consistency means… if the goblins come every moon cycle, then we must be… consistent in smashing them!"
The crowd roared approval.
The HUD pinged.
Followers: 125
Aiden smirked. Still got it.
But just as the crowd began chanting CLAP-CLAP in unison, a horn wailed from the edge of the forest.
The villagers froze. Children clutched their mothers' skirts. Men grabbed rusty spears.
Aiden stiffened. "What the hell was that?"
The old matron's face went pale. "Goblins…"
From the treeline, figures emerged — squat, green-skinned, with jagged teeth and crude weapons. Their yellow eyes gleamed in the morning sun.
Aiden's blood turned to ice. Holy crap. They're real. Actual goblins.
There were only a dozen of them, scouts by the look of it. But to Aiden, they looked like an army. His knees shook. His brain screamed, Run. Hide. Pretend to be dead again.
But dozens of eyes turned toward him, wide with fear and hope.
"Oracle!" someone shouted. "Save us!"
Aiden swallowed. Oh, I'm so screwed.
The goblins sneered and howled, brandishing clubs and rusty knives. One licked its lips, pointing at the villagers like they were dinner.
Aiden's heart hammered. He had no sword, no armor, no qi techniques. Just his big mouth.
Alright, Aiden. Time to do what you do best: talk nonsense.
He thrust his arms skyward. "Fear not, my followers! For this… is merely an early engagement test!"
The villagers blinked.
The goblins blinked.
"What's an engagement test?" someone whispered.
Aiden pointed dramatically at the goblins. "They are here… to test your Likes! To see if you truly believe!"
The HUD flickered.
Followers: 133
The villagers gasped. Their fear turned into frantic clapping. CLAP-CLAP. CLAP-CLAP-CLAP. The sound echoed across the square.
The goblins froze, ears twitching. The thunderous clapping unnerved them.
Aiden's confidence flared. "Yes! Louder! Smash that like button until the heavens themselves quake!"
The villagers roared, stomping their feet, clapping until their palms turned red. Dust rose into the air. The ground trembled faintly.
The goblins shifted uneasily. One took a hesitant step back.
Aiden's jaw dropped. Holy crap, it's working?!
He puffed out his chest, striding forward. "Behold! Even the goblins know fear when faced with true engagement!"
The HUD pinged.
Followers: 150
The goblins snarled, but the sound was drowned out by the villagers' chanting. Children screamed slogans. Old men beat sticks against the dirt in rhythm.
One goat even joined in, bleating CLAP-CLAP with uncanny timing.
The goblins wavered, then broke. With hisses and curses, they fled back into the trees.
The villagers erupted into cheers. "The Oracle has driven them off!"
Aiden stood frozen, staring at the retreating goblins. His legs shook so hard he thought they'd collapse. His throat was dry, his palms clammy.
I didn't fight. I didn't even touch them. I just… talked. And they left. This is insane.
Then he noticed the HUD again.
Quest Progress: 1/1 Goblin Raid Repelled (Minor).Reward: +50 Followers.Followers: 200.
Two hundred.
Aiden nearly fainted. Two hundred followers! In one day! I'm growing faster than TikTok trends!
The villagers surged forward, lifting him onto their shoulders, chanting his name. He flailed, panic and glee warring inside him.
"Oracle! Oracle! You saved us!"
"Oracle! Teach us more!"
The goats bleated along, their voices oddly triumphant.
Aiden covered his face with one hand, muttering under his breath. "What the hell is my life…"
But deep down, a grin spread across his face. I'm not just surviving. I'm thriving.
That night, the village held a feast in his honor.
Aiden sat at the head of the table, gnawing on roasted rabbit, while villagers pressed close, hanging on his every word. He tried not to laugh when they argued over the "true meaning" of "like and subscribe."
One farmer insisted "like" meant smashing goblins. Another claimed it meant smashing rocks to build stronger walls. A woman shouted that "subscribe" meant planting more wheat.
Aiden leaned back, sipping from a clay mug, smug as could be. "You're all right. Engagement has… many layers."
The HUD flickered again.
Followers: 225
He nearly spit out his drink. I'm gaining followers just by being vague? This world is incredible.
As the fire crackled and the villagers danced, Aiden's grin faded slightly.
Because in the shadows, Darrow the hunter stood alone, glaring. His bow rested casually in his hand, but his eyes burned with suspicion.
Aiden shivered. The hater's not done with me yet…