The guy in the trench coat seemed to notice Locke's stare.
He moved.
With a stride that was anything but human—almost eerily steady—he headed toward the glow of the pickup truck's lights.
What set off alarms even more was how his left hand slipped into the inner pocket of his coat, natural as could be but totally out of place, like he was fishing for something!
Danger!
Locke's battle instincts hit red alert in a heartbeat!
His mind raced, already summoning—
Buzz!
But something even faster—a sharp, youthful burst of invisible energy—beat him to it!
Golden light flared, and a tall, burly stand clad in ornate golden armor materialized silently at Locke's side!
The old man paused for a split second, then a wave of warmth and pride swelled in his chest.
This kid...
Locke's smile deepened, and he didn't hesitate anymore.
Purple light shimmered, and that sleek, razor-sharp figure snapped into existence.
Star Platinum and The World stood side by side! United against the threat!
One gold, one purple—the two mighty stands were like guardian spirits now, shielding Locke, Dio, and Seraphiel behind them.
Locke cracked his neck with a soft click, his voice carrying a thrill he hadn't felt in ages.
"Dio, looks like tonight..."
"We're doing some father-son ORA!"
"It's father-son MUDA!" Dio shot back, dead serious.
"Muda..."
Even Seraphiel in Locke's arms babbled it out in his baby voice, flailing his little hands wildly.
Locke's face darkened, but his eyes stayed locked on the approaching trench coat guy.
The man finally halted twenty or thirty yards away, slowly raising the hand that had been in his pocket.
"The—"
The father and son's words cut off cold.
Because what the guy pulled out wasn't some weapon or shady item like they'd braced for.
It was...
Just a plain-looking...
Kinda crumpled-up...?
Baby diaper?!
The super common kind from any grocery store.
"..."
Locke and Dio's faces froze, their razor-sharp vigilance flipping to total bewilderment.
Their brains short-circuited for a beat.
Ignoring the two intimidating stands radiating menace, the man acted like he hadn't clocked the stunned looks on Locke and Dio's faces.
He stepped a little closer, his face half-hidden under the brim of his hat tilting toward Seraphiel in Locke's arms. He lingered there for a moment before doing something even more baffling.
His left fingers curled in slightly.
And then...
An unbelievable scene unfolded!
Buzz—!
Something indescribable...
Like a chill, vast energy rippling from the depths of the cosmos—spread from his palm!
The diaper bag in his hand puffed up, glowing with a soft, moonlight-white light!
The glow intensified, and the bag itself transformed in the radiance—the cheap plastic turning into the smoothest silk, its surface shimmering like distant stars.
A few seconds later, as the light faded...
All that was left in the man's hand was a bag the same size as before, but totally different in feel.
It was a warm, milky white—not quite metal, not quite jade—smooth and sleek, with faint, ethereal patterns flickering across it.
This wasn't just any bag anymore...
It was like a flawless work of art, carved from the heavens!
"You...?"
Locke said, his tone weirded out.
"A stranger," the man replied, his voice as ordinary as his look. "I figured you might need this."
With a flick of his wrist, the glowing diaper bag floated toward Locke, steady and spot-on, like an invisible hand was guiding it.
Locke caught it on reflex, and it felt incredible in his grip—warm, silky soft.
"Hey! Who the heck are you—?" Locke started to ask.
But before he could finish, he looked up, and the shadowy spot under the streetlight was empty.
The mysterious man in the black trench coat and top hat had melted into the night like ink, or like a phantom that never existed, vanishing without a trace.
The cold wind kept blowing, and the convenience store's fluorescent lights hummed faintly.
Locke and Dio stared at each other, total confusion in their eyes.
The whole thing—the last thirty seconds or so—felt like some surreal, absurd dream.
"All that flair just for this?"
Locke glanced down at the "gift" in his hand, utterly flabbergasted.
And that dusty memory fragment, buried deep, got jarred loose by the bizarre encounter.
Black trench coat, top hat, silver chain on his chest.
Here one second, gone the next.
Phantom Stranger...
The enigmatic wanderer.
Locke's expression turned odd.
In the legends, this guy was a timeless, space-bending observer—ancient and mysterious as the universe itself.
Always rocking that signature top hat and indestructible black trench coat.
His motives? Nobody could pin 'em down.
His power? Bottomless, like the laws of reality bent for him.
He'd pop up out of nowhere at key moments in time and space, then vanish just as mysteriously.
So yeah, we can draw a conclusion.
This dude raiding diapers in Smallville late at night?
Probably 'cause this timeline's version of things needed diapers right then.
"..."
Yeah...
The logic was so ridiculous even Locke had to chuckle at himself.
---
The farm at midnight welcomed back its weary folks.
The warmth inside chased away the night's chill, but it also brought...
A familiar sense of impending doom.
"Hiss—!"
A crystal-clear gasp cut through the quiet living room like an alarm!
Locke, mid-motion as he went to set Seraphiel down, froze.
Dio, who'd just shrugged off his coat and was heading to wash up, went rigid in an instant!
That sound...
They knew it all too well!
"It's happening!"
Locke barked, reacting like lightning.
He lunged forward, not giving Dio a chance to process, and with practiced ease, shoved the brewing-disaster Seraphiel right into Dio's arms.
"Hold him tight! Code red!"
Locke's words flew fast, his face etched with the gravity of a thousand battles.
"I'm washing up and prepping for war! Hang in there!"
But the second he hit the bathroom sink and turned on the faucet, bubbles not even formed yet...
"Dad—DAD—!!!"
A shout exploded from the living room—pure shock, disbelief, laced with outright horror!
It was Dio's voice, but cracked and shrill.
Locke's heart skipped!
He didn't even shake off the water droplets, barreling out of the kitchen like a madman, wiping his wet hands on his pants, dread climbing his throat—
What the—?
"What happened, Dio?! Seraphiel, he—"
Locke's words died.
He saw the scene on the living room rug.
Dio was cradling Seraphiel, but at his feet...
Four or five brand-new, spotless baby diapers were scattered!
No big deal on its own.
The issue was in Dio's hand.
One arm still holding Seraphiel, the other clutching...
That glowing, warm gift from the stranger.
Right in front of Locke, Dio yanked it open!
Whoosh!
A fresh diaper slid out, tossed casually to the floor.
Whoosh! Another!
Whoosh! One more!
Each pull was butter-smooth, like the little bag was hooked up to some interdimensional diaper factory!
And no matter how many Dio pulled out...
The bag's thickness and fullness didn't budge an inch!
It stayed just as plump as when Locke first grabbed it, that soft glow pulsing steadily, like it was quietly thumbing its nose at human common sense and the laws of conservation of mass!
"This... this can't be real!"
Dio's voice shook, like his whole worldview had been smashed to bits over and over.
He stopped pulling, staring in disbelief at the pile of five or six diapers at his feet, then snapping his head up to the unchanged, bulging bag.
"I... I pulled out six! Seven? How's it... not going down at all?"
"This breaks every physics rule out there! What about conservation of energy?! Mass?!"
You think stands and time-stop fit physics?
Sigh...
My poor, dumb kid.
Locke sighed, ruffling Dio's hair with a helpless look.
"...What's with that look, Dad?!" Dio's mouth twitched. "The point right now is..."
"Is that guy the Diaper Fairy or what?!"
He was half-asking Locke, half-grilling the weird gift.
Or maybe grilling this reality that'd suddenly gone full fantasy.
Locke went quiet.
He let out a long, long sigh.
Tonight's craziness topped every crisis from the last decade combined.
"Alright then..."
The head of the house finally found his voice.
He stepped over, scooped up a stray regular diaper, and with expert ease, started changing Seraphiel—like nothing weird had gone down.
"Looks like... for your brother's next few years, or heck, the whole Kent family line..."
As he swapped things out smoothly, Locke eyed the still-bulging wonder in Dio's hand, his tone casual as stating the solar system was bigger than the sun—simple fact.
"...we're set for diapers, no worries."
---
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