1
Dementia is a terrible disease that splits us.
into two: our "mind" and our "body."
On a windy but sunny day, Mike was going to his English class, which would have been no biggie on a normal day.
But today would be the day he understood why there was always a replica of him in the darkness. The frontman and the boy in the shadows.
I honestly can't tell Mike's story best because right now I am only "one of the two," which is leaving me with a ghost of a memory, but there is one thing I am very sure about my story. Mike wouldn't want to be seen in this shade of grey.
Before I begin, let's never forget he was just a boy before the shadows took hold, so let's circle back to where we left off.
As Mike went for his English class, he learned that day that not only would he be the host for this year's upcoming graduation day, but he was also a paramour to one of his course mates.
After the shock, the situation at hand finally dawned on him as his friend Gloria was staring deep into his eyes like they were an open book, not knowing he was still unsure of the story or the chapter he was on, but as he saw those three words of power on the board, "I like you," he knew he didn't have all the time in the world, but unfortunately the first word that came out of his mouth was nothing other than "whattt." But as this poorly chosen word came out of his mouth, he saw that the chapter written in gold had just been torn from the book as he saw the sunrise in her eyes slowly become dusk.
More I cannot say, because my hands are tied, all because of one person, the boy in the shadow who has control over my other half.
As days passed, it seemed as if Gloria was avoiding me, Mike, and I was baffled as to why. I asked myself, "Was it all because of what I said?" I tried my best to make it known that it wasn't intentional, but all that seemed to have happened was that I finally realized I was on a one-sided bridge and she wanted nothing to do with me.
"Next week."
"Aah!" I shouted as I tripped on the staircase, scared not only that I would get injured but also that this week would be as bad as last week, in which having an incident on the first day is always a bad omen. But it later turned out to be not just a little worry but a true manifestation. Now I believe what they always say: never doubt your instinct.
On Tuesday, something happened to me, something I cannot say, once again because of my other half, but I felt like a piece of me had been defiled, like there was someone else on my body.
"I knew something had happened, though I couldn't explain it at first. The feeling clung to me, heavy and unsettling, refusing to let me rest.
I told myself that no matter the cost, I would find out what it was.
The thought haunted me until I finally decided to confront it.
I walked into the restroom, my heart pounding but my mind set. The silence in that place felt unnatural, pressing down on me.
I stood before the mirror, staring at myself as if I could force the truth out of my reflection.
Slowly, I began to undress, peeling away each layer with shaking hands.
Part of me hoped I was wrong, that I would find nothing at all. But as the last piece of clothing slipped away, the truth revealed itself.
I froze, staring at what I wished I hadn't seen. My body carried the evidence I didn't want to believe.
In that moment, shock gave way to horror. I realized then, with no escape from it, that I had been molested."
But this couldn't be possible because... NO!!!. It just can't be possible. I refuse to believe such a thing can ever happen to me.
But sadly it did, and the worst part was my other half once again took away my voice, causing me to be unable to cry because I was silenced to the point that I wouldn't know why I was crying if I did, but the true misery began the next day.
I had gotten a strange fondness for that feeling, the one I couldn't put my hands on.
But I knew I wanted to experience that feeling again; sometimes I like to believe I wanted to experience it again so I could finally be able to speak or find a way to wrap my hands around what happened or know what went on, but deep down, very deep down, I knew a part of me liked that feeling.
So I embarked on a journey, one that I wish I never set sail on. And as I requested, I had the opportunity to feel the same way again.
"I took hold of it, feeling it settle naturally in my grasp. Every moment that followed carried its own weight, and I allowed myself to sink into it. In the end, I embraced the experience and savored it completely."
But now I can't differentiate whether I feel defiled or I feel uplifted. But I know this feeling feels good.
So I did it again and again and again and again to the point I forgot what the main purpose of this was.
That my eyes had left the goalpost and I was now someone else in a sea of faces. As that present week ended, so did that pool of mistakes follow.
But that isn't what is on your mind right now. You aren't concerned about the mistake ending; your true concern or curiosity is which part of the half is Mike. The "MIND" or the "BODY," but don't worry, I am going to spell it out for you. Mike is the…