"Keith!?" Ronan exclaimed as he stared wide eyed at the shrew-faced bastard standing behind him. "How are you here!? You died... Don't tell me I have to kill you. Not that I wouldn't enjoy it, but…" he trailed off.
I don't want to be a murderer! he cursed the system. A human murderer, anyway… he added as he remembered the lesser goblin he'd pulverised in the first stage of the tutorial.
"Ronan? Thank god you're here," Keith spluttered, rushing forwards and grabbing onto Ronan's arm. "I thought I was going to die when that green thing attacked me but I managed to kill it somehow. You have to protect me! I'll pay you," he begged.
"Pay me? Can you give other people the credits?" Ronan muttered. "I mean, we're both here. You'll have to fight, Keith. I'm not going to do this alone. Look at those ugly green bastards. That sword looks as likely to give me tetanus as cut me open!"
"Credits? What are you talking about? I'll give you ten thousand dollars to keep me alive, please Ronan!"
"Keith, I know it's a little hard to understand given that you died before seeing the end of the fucking world, but this," Ronan snapped, pointing a finger at the goblins, "is our new reality. Fucking dollars… Help me kill them or I'm gonna kill you for a second time."
Somehow dying had made the diminutive manager even more annoying than he'd been in his first life. On a positive note, the fact that Keith had been revived hopefully meant everyone who'd died in the final moments before being whisked to the tutorial had also been brought back.
Not that Ronan was praying for anyone specific, but the more humans that survived the better. The lesser goblin warrior screeched unintelligibly at the pair of them as it began advancing.
Unlike the lesser goblin, which had charged Ronan without a second thought, this gnarly green fucker was more cautious. While the warrior closed the distance, the archer retreated, putting space between the humans and itself.
Ronan snarled at Keith, who had tears and snot running down his face. He wondered how the guy had even survived the first stage of the tutorial.
He really wanted to just pick him up and toss him at the goblin as a distraction, but that was a step too far. Keith had been a crappy manager, but that didn't make him deserving of death.
Besides, Ronan had already earned his cathartic release when the guy had died the first time—as morbid and dark as it was to admit. Instead, he would need to try and defeat the goblins without the small bastard's help.
The warrior had a short sword and a round wooden buckler with a metal stud in the centre. Ronan didn't fancy his chances facing the green git with his bare fists, so he'd try and steal its sword.
That was easier said than done, but if you never tried you'd never achieve shit. His grandma had taught him that. It was no wonder he'd turned out to be a stubborn bastard.
He rushed the warrior, catching it off guard during its lethargic advance. Keith kept wailing behind him but if the man was going to be a useless sack of shit then Ronan was content to ignore him.
The lesser goblin warrior had agile reflexes. Even though Ronan had surprised it, the swing of its sword came fast and precise.
He was forced to throw himself to the side to avoid being cut. He stumbled but kept his balance and forward momentum. Ronan lowered his body and smashed his shoulder into the goblin's shield with the force of a charging bull.
Despite the force of the blow, the sturdy lesser goblin warrior took it like a champ. The shield groaned but held and the goblin was pushed back just two steps.
It exhaled sharply and raised its sword. Ronan was still off balance, but he was determined to fight.
The blade fell like the hand of god to smite him. He threw himself to the side to avoid the slash, splashing into the wet mud.
A sharp screech pierced his ears. The lesser goblin warrior was furious he'd evaded. Keith's wails were equally dissonant, the man curled into a ball where they'd first arrived.
Ronan grunted and started hauling himself back to his feet. He heard a sharp whistle and threw his head down.
A hot sting lanced down his bicep as an arrow grazed his skin. Blood trickled from the wound through the rip in his dress shirt.
You have been hit by [Lesser Goblin Archer Lv.5]!
-6 Health [Slashing]
He flicked mud from his hands and jumped up, the movement tough but manageable. Ronan was no fighter, but he'd been throwing heavy circles around in the gym for the past decade. He'd be damned if he let a pair of ugly green pricks that were more wart than flesh put him in the ground.
He levelled a steely gaze at the lesser goblin archer, the disgusting creature sneering at him through yellow teeth and down a bulbous nose. He glanced at Keith and kissed his teeth. A tiger can't change its stripes, I suppose, he sighed to himself.
Ronan wouldn't risk his own life for a useless bastard who wouldn't fight for himself. However, if Keith managed to live through this then that was simply fate.
A twang snapped him back to reality as the archer loosed another arrow. The first hit had only taken a sliver of his health, but there was only so much to go around.
Avoiding the arrows while fighting the warrior would be a tough task, but Ronan had no other choice. He slipped past the arrow, only to find the warrior's sword stabbing towards him.
He bent backwards in a gravity defying move of acrobatics, putting the extra point of agility to work. He felt a pop at the base of spine and knew he'd suffer for it, but better to be hurt than dead.
The sword split the sky as it passed over his face, millimetres from his nose. The warrior screeched again, stepping closer instead of pulling back the blade.
Ronan sprang upright, his fist exploding towards the warrior's face like a spring snapping into place. He grinned as he felt the connection.
His knuckles pushed through the crack as he broke the lesser goblin warrior's nose. However, he hadn't escaped unpunished.
At the same moment he caved in the warrior's gnarled face, it smashed him in the gut with the iron cap of its buckler. He gasped as the wind was blown from his lungs.
An arrow whistled through the air and struck him in the shoulder the next moment. He winced, sparing a glance to check the damage.
You have been hit by [Lesser Goblin Warrior Lv.4]!
-11 Health [Smashing]
You have been hit by [Lesser Goblin Archer Lv.5]!
-14 Health [Piercing]
You are [Bleeding]!
-4 Health / second
What he saw was less than ideal. Ronan was down to a little over half his total health points. Even as he checked the counter, the first tick of bleeding damage brought him to exactly half—a measly 35 points.
The archer cackled in delight. Ronan grunted and snapped the shaft of the arrow, tossing it to the mud and ripping the tip out the other side. He wasn't dead until it hit 0. Even then he might refuse to drop.
Another garbled screech assaulted his ears. The lesser goblin warrior was still stumbling back, clutching a bloodied, broken nose.
Ronan slapped his cheeks with both hands and inhaled deeply. He lunged forward and unleashed a savage battle cry, roaring at the goblin like a furious lion.
From an outsider's perspective, figuring out which of them was the monster might be difficult. Ronan didn't give a shit about decorum anymore. The world had changed the moment that inhuman voice had made its first declaration.
His shoulder screamed in pain as he smashed another fist into the goblin's face. It staggered back, fresh blood spurting into the air.
But Ronan was relentless. He kicked its shin, the bone cracking as he swept its other leg from underneath it. The warrior fell, weakly swinging its sword at his head.
He smashed it aside with the palm of his hand and straddled the ugly green monster. It grabbed its buckler with both hands and held it between them.
Ronan grabbed it too, yanking with all his might. The goblin clung on, refusing to give an inch. It raised its head to screech at him. It snapped at his hand with yellow teeth, weapons giving way to savagery as it saw its death looming overhead.
With another savage roar, Ronan smashed his own head down, clenching his jaw as his skull split the goblin's own. Stars danced in his eyes and he saw his health drop a little lower.
The goblin had no strength and he ripped the shield from its grasp, launching it at the archer like a frisbee. It loosed an arrow but it went wide as it dodged the errant buckler.
Ronan grinned through bloody teeth at the little bastard between his legs. He began to smash his fists into its head until a chime and a floating message broke the violent trance.
However, he barely had time to read it as another twang sounded across the empty field, followed by a sharp whistle.