–Mom –said a small child–, when is dad going to return?
–He may take long before he arrives –said a woman–. You will see him tomorrow in the morning. Then, you can tell him about taking you to the zoo on the weekend.
–You should go to sleep, it is getting pretty late –said a woman with a firm voice.
…
¡Please! –screamed a boy–. ¡I will drink it all! ¡I will drink it…! ¡PLEASE!
…
A boy is sitting quietly while he drinks milk with a straw. He is being watched by a strange woman.
–I can't drink more –said the boy–. Please, I can't drink anymore…
–You can't drink more? –said the strange woman, while she approached the boy, she grabbed the boy's arm and calmly checked the mug of milk– There is still much left.
–I can't drink it –said the boy–. I promise you that if I drink I will vomit.
–Okay –said the strange woman with a calm voice–. Come with me…
–¡NO! –screamed the boy–. ¡Please, no!
–Are you going to drink your milk? –said the strange woman.
The boy sat and started drinking the milk again. The boy wasn't lying, it wasn't much after that he started to cough and spilled the milk.
–Come with me –said the strange woman, this time she had an irritated expression.
…
–I will die –thought the boy–. I will die, and my mother will come to see my floating corpse. I don't want to die… P-please…
The boy couldn't speak as his lungs were filled with water. The last thing that the boy saw was the worried face of the strange woman, and the feeling of his back being ripped by her nails.
…
–I… –thought the boy, laying in bed–. I am a burden… Mom always says that the day I was born was the happiest day of her life, but I know she doesn't want to tell me that I am a nuisance.
–I was a mistake, and now she tries her best to take the responsibility. –thought the boy, closing his eyes–. If it wasn't for me, she wouldn't be suffering…
–I know everyone thinks I am a burden… –thought the boy with watering eyes–. I wish I could tell them to their faces, but they would just treat me as if I was having a tantrum…
–I see it in their eyes each time they are with me –thought the boy with anger–, they change their attitudes because I am a child… I am useless… I can't do what others can do… I have no talent nor can I behave well… I am useless, I am a burden to this world and to everyone in it… I wish I was dead, so I would stop feeling this emptiness and pain…
–I wish I was dead… –thought the boy, sobbing in bed–.God if you truly care about your creations, please make me never wake up again… God, please kill me tonight…
–I don't want to die –whispered the boy, crying his heart out–. I wish I was never born, so I wouldn't have to feel all of this… I wish I would just cease to exist…
The boy stopped crying as he realized something.
–If I die –whispered the boy–, my mother would be very sad… She will miss me…
–Will she?… –whispered the boy with widely open eyes–. She will probably just cry the first few days, but time after, she will go on with her life… I will hurt her only at the start, but I will save her the burden of raising me…
The boy continued to lament his existence through the rest of the night.
…
–Don't take him to those classes –said an old man–. Those classes are teaching him to be violent. He doesn't need to learn how to defend himself, he is being encouraged to hurt others.
–Please grandpa –though the boy–, I don't want to go. Please…
–No –said a woman–. They teach him discipline and are the complete opposite, as they teach him to not hurt others.
The boy was taken to a car and went to his classes.
…
The boy was playing at a hospital waiting room.
–He is dead –said the woman.
The boy didn't cry, but instead was staring blankly at the floor.
…
–I can't eat my late snack the same way –thought the boy–, if he is not here.
The boy started to look tearful. The boy noticed the falling of drops moving through his cheeks. The boys hurriedly ran to his room and closed the door.
–Why must all good people die? –thought the boy, breaking down in tears–. They shouldn't have died… He was the only one that protected me and loved me… H-he also loved me, but he… Both of them would have protected me… How can criminals still be living, while people like them die…
–God is cruel, god is unjust –thought the boy with anger–, god is all except caring… God doesn't care about us…
–B-but he believed in him and he was very devout… –thought the boy with regret and anger– Being betrayed by the god that you pray to… H-he shouldn't have died…
…
–Mom! –said the boy, with innocent and shining eyes–. Can we go to the circus again tomorrow?
–You do really like the circus –said the mom, accompanied by a sigh–. I think that tomorrow is the clown show.
–Do you like aerial silk performers?… –said the mom changing the topic–. I saw that there was a circus workshop, and I thought of maybe enrolling you in the aerial silk classes… What do you think?
–Is okay –said the boy–, but I also want to do the clown classes…
–I will enroll you in both then –said the mom.
…
–Where were you?! –said the woman–. What happened?! They told me that they couldn't find you during the whole day…
…
–I found a clown workshop –said the mom–. It is about clown, not the traditional clown performance.
–It's okay –said the boy–, I can give it a try.
…
–I found a clown workshop –said the woman–. The teacher is a famous clown.
–I don't want to go –said the boy.
…
It was late at night.
–Why are you always like this? –said the boy–. You don't understand!
The woman didn't reply and without saying a single word, she left the room. The boy was mad and couldn't bear the situation. He stared blankly at the wall.
–She never understands me –thought the boy with anger–. I am her mistake… I owe her nothing… She owes me everything for bringing me to this miserable world… I didn't want to be born…
The boy walks towards a room. The door of the room was slightly ajar and the boy immediately noticed.
–She usually locks the door –thought the boy–. She must not have realized that the door hadn't closed.
The boy entered the room quietly and saw the woman laying in bed. He started walking slowly toward the woman's head.
–Mom –said the boy, with a soft and calm voice–. Mom? Can you hear me, please?
The woman didn't even open her eyes, she just turned to the other side of the bed.
The boy once again repeated the same action, but it had the same outcome.
–Mom –said the boy, each time in a louder voice–. Mom, mom, mom… Mom? MOM?!
The woman was irritated by the boy's presence so this time she decided to speak.
–Get out of my room –said the woman coldly, showing her anger towards the boy.
The boy saw the woman's neck and fixed his eyes on it. The words of the woman grew stronger and stronger in the boy's heart, until he stopped feeling anything.
The boy walked to the door, but before leaving, he decided to look back one last time. The boy remembered how he fixed his eyes on the woman's neck and decided to stare intensely at it.
–I don't matter to you –thought the boy–. I am nothing… You are now defenseless and…
The boy's soulless stare, saw the woman's neck as its sole objective.
The boy could already see himself taking action, and already thought in his own end.
The boy couldn't feel fear nor anger, he was controlled by a deeper feeling.
The boy never felt so powerful before, and he felt that nothing mattered.
Before the boy could do anything, something resonated in his heart. He noticed that he was no longer in control of his strengthened body. He tried to fight against his own body.
In the end, he managed to leave the room, but not without slamming the door shut.
…
The boy was crying in his room. A man stood in front of him, watching over him.
–I had no control over myself –said the boy–. I could have done anything, and it wouldn't have mattered to me… I-I w-wanted to murder my mother…
–It's okay –said the man–, we have all been angry with our mothers. I remember that when I was young, I thought on multiple occasions of murdering some of the people I knew.
–Yes –said the boy in response–, but you had never thought of murdering your own mother.
–Do you really think that? –said the man– The important thing is that you didn't, and that is all what matters.
–But –said the boy in frustration–. I was ready to commit suicide just to see her dead.
–But you didn't –said the man–. You are still young and having those strong feelings is normal for your age. The essential thing is that you have self-control.
–It was as if I was watching another person in my body –said the boy–. This other person didn't care about anything and was full of power. I felt as if watching something as in the spectators point of view, which made me feel impotent.
–You are scared now –said the man–. You are scared of yourself because of thinking about those things. You being scared means that you don't want to do that, which means that nothing is going to happen.
–I love my mom –said the boy–. I don't want to kill her…
–You love your mom –said the man–. That is why you will never hurt her. You don't need to worry. Remember that you are who controls your body. Each action you take is a decision that you think on doing. You are very intelligent and thoughtful, so you should believe in yourself.
…
Xilovy finally woke up and heard loud laughter coming from somewhere outside the room.
He crawled out of the cabinet, with his mind engulfed by an overwhelming flood of unrecognizable voices.
Suddenly, a quick and loud sound reverberated through all the nearby rooms and the corridor.
Xilovy was startled and quickly found out that the laughter had stopped. He didn't think twice and decided to go out of the room and check what was happening.
The corridor was his only way of escaping, so either way he needed to head out of the room.
–… –Xilovy's mind suddenly became blank.
Xilovy saw the monster laying on the ground, with holes in its head and chest, but what really heightened his senses was the gun aiming in his direction.
It was a woman who had the gun, and she quickly looked Xilovy up and down. Xilovy was actually nothing muscular, so he didn't look intimidating to anyone.
–Do you have a weapon? –said the woman in a commanding tone–. If you do, leave it on the floor.
–Does my charisma and cleverness count as a weapon? –said Xilovy in a joking manner–. Because if it does, then I have a lot of weapons…
The woman couldn't believe Xilovy's words.
–Are you on drugs? –said the startled woman–. Who the hell comes to a place like this without any type of weapon?!
–But I do have a weapon –said Xilovy–, a very strong one I must say.
Xilovy smiled bright as the sun and pointed towards the woman.
–Now I have you –said Xilovy–. A beautiful, strong and capable woman with a gun, is the strongest weapon there is.
–You should stop consuming whatever you are consuming –said the woman–. Are you flirting?
–No –said Xilovy in a joking manner–, no, no, I am only presenting the facts.
–I am going to kill myself –thought Xilovy–. I don't know what to do… I can only joke and because of it I may be on the verge of dying by her hands.
–How about the fact of that hole you have on your chest –said the woman.
Xilovy quickly tilted his head down, intending to find the hole in his chest. Not long after, a loud sound originated from the corridor.
The frightened Xilovy fell on his butt. The sound originated from the woman stomping on the ground and making a bang sound with her mouth.
–You are an idiot –said the woman, staring directly into Xilovy's eyes.