Chapter 11: Mouri, My Friend! Are You... Under a Lot of Stress?
Beika Metropolitan Police Department, Criminal Investigation Division.
Under the bright fluorescent lights, a group of detectives was gathered around a conference table littered with evidence photos. The case had been stalled for three days with zero progress.
Inspector Megure rubbed his bloodshot eyes and looked over at Kogoro Mouri, who was sitting in the corner with his eyes closed, seemingly meditating.
"Mouri, my friend," the Inspector said wearily. "Do you have any thoughts?"
Kogoro's eyes snapped open. He gave the evidence photos a quick, confident scan. "Hmm, the case is pretty obvious," he announced. "But first, I need to use the restroom!"
With that, he strode briskly out of the room, leaving behind a baffled group of officers.
"There he goes again," Officer Sato whispered to her partner. "This is, what, the fifth time this month?"
"Every single time," Takagi whispered back. "He goes to the bathroom and comes back a genius."
"Don't be ridiculous," Sato chided, though she couldn't hide her own curiosity. "It's probably just a habit."
Standing off to the side, Conan contemplated Kogoro's bizarre new behavior. Ever since the Kenji Fujiwara case last month, it had become a predictable, yet inexplicable, pattern. Before solving any case, he would make a trip to the restroom. When he came out, he was like a different person, his deductions frighteningly accurate.
What in the world is happening in that restroom?
Inside a stall, Kogoro made sure he was alone before pulling the amber-brown Soul Gem from under his shirt. What a pain, he grumbled internally. Why in the hell do I have to transform to use this stupid power?!
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.
Transform!
In a flash of brilliant light, his suit and tie dissolved, replaced by the dramatic red-and-black magical girl outfit—hair clips, thigh-high stockings, frilly skirt, and all.
"Every time I see this, I just want to dig a hole and die in it," Kogoro cursed under his breath, a vein throbbing on his forehead as he looked at his reflection.
Kyubey appeared on the windowsill, its red eyes gleaming. "But you got your wish, did you not?"
[Non-Human Beings Chat Group]
SpongeBob SquarePants: Wowee! Mr. Mouri transformed again! That red and black color scheme is so cool!
Tom Cat: [Cat_Facepalming.jpeg], [Cat_Snickering.jpeg]
"Shut up!" Kogoro hissed at the creature. "If it wasn't for the cases... and the whiskey... I would never do this!"
He closed his eyes, activating the "Eye of Truth" that only worked in his magical girl form. Instantly, the fragments of the case rearranged themselves in his mind. The clues began to glow, the connections between them becoming crystal clear.
"I see... so the killer is—"
At that exact moment, the restroom door was shoved open.
Inspector Megure's voice boomed, "Mouri, my friend, are you alright? We're all waiting—"
His words died in his throat.
The Inspector's eyes bulged. His mouth fell open into a perfect 'O'. The cup of coffee in his hand slipped from his fingers and crashed to the floor, splattering hot liquid all over his polished shoes, but he didn't even feel it.
The sight before him had completely shattered his perception of reality.
Kogoro Mouri... his old colleague, the serious detective he'd known for years... was standing there in a red-and-black, lace-trimmed outfit. With a hair clip. And black stockings that showed off a disturbing amount of hairy leg. And gloves. And a frilly skirt. And a magic wand.
"M-M-Mouri... my friend?!" the Inspector stammered.
Kogoro spun around. Their eyes met. Time froze.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Kogoro let out a shriek that would have made a professional soprano jealous.
Megure stumbled backward, crashing into the doorframe. "I... I didn't see anything!"
"Wait, Inspector!" Kogoro pleaded, reaching out a hand, the lace on his glove looking particularly garish under the fluorescent lights. "Y-You have to let me explain!"
"This is... it's a special detective technique! A kind of... uh... Role-Playing Deduction Method! Yes! That's it!"
Inspector Megure stared, utterly dumbfounded. "Role... Playing?"
"YES! That's it!" Kogoro insisted, sweating bullets. "Wearing this... it stimulates my deductive inspiration! It's... it's the latest detective method from overseas!"
The look on the Inspector's face slowly shifted from pure shock to one of deep, profound sympathy. "Mouri, my friend," he said, his voice soft with pity. "Have you been under too much stress lately? We all know... ever since you and Eri separated..."
"IT'S NOT LIKE THAT!" Kogoro yelled, stomping his foot in frustration, which only made his skirt flutter.
Just then, Officers Sato and Takagi happened to be walking past the restroom. "What's going on? It sounds like someone's fighting in there," Sato said.
"That's Mr. Mouri and the Inspector's voices," Takagi added.
Inspector Megure, moving with surprising speed, blocked the doorway, shielding his colleagues from the horrifying sight within. "N-Nothing's wrong! Mouri is just... demonstrating a special deduction technique for me! Right, my friend?" he called back, his eyes pleading.
"THAT'S RIGHT!" Kogoro yelled from inside. "I'll be out in a minute!"
"Oh? Is it the kind of technique that requires privacy?" Sato asked, trying to peek around the Inspector.
"YES! A great deal of privacy!" Megure insisted, practically pushing them away. "Let's just go back to the conference room and wait!" He shot Kogoro one last, desperate "fix this now" look before leaving.
Inside, Kogoro collapsed onto a closed toilet lid. "It's over," he moaned. "My life is completely over..."
Meanwhile, Mitsuhiko and Haibara were waiting for Conan in a park near the police station.
Suddenly, Mitsuhiko froze. "Haibara! Do you feel that?"
Haibara nodded, her expression serious. "A magical fluctuation..."
"What is it?" Conan asked, noticing their sudden change in demeanor.
"Someone just used magic," Haibara explained. "From the direction of the police station."
"You mean there's another one besides you two?"
The three exchanged a look and decided to investigate. They slipped back into the station just in time to see Inspector Megure exiting the restroom with a deeply traumatized expression on his face. Mitsuhiko and Haibara shared a knowing glance and quietly approached the restroom, Conan right behind them.
Inside, they found Kogoro Mouri frantically trying to straighten his suit, the amber-brown Soul Gem on his chest still faintly visible.
"Uncle Kogoro!" Conan whispered in shock. "He's a contractor too?"
The pieces clicked together with a horrifying snap. So this is the real reason for his sudden genius...
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SpongeBob SquarePants: Oh, Neptune! He got caught! What's he gonna do now?!
Tom Cat: [Cat_Covering_Face_with_Paws.jpeg], [Cat_Shrugging_Helplessly.jpeg]
Hidden from view, Kyubey observed the entire fiasco. A few hours later, the case was solved, the killer was arrested, and the two junior contractors cornered their newest, most unlikely senior member.
In a nearby coffee shop, the two magical kids sat across from the magical... man, the atmosphere thick with a serious, yet utterly absurd, tension.
"So," Kogoro began, glaring at the two elementary schoolers. "You two are also... you know..."
"Magical girls," Haibara stated flatly.
"I still don't get why a grown man transforms into... that!" Kogoro ranted. "What part of me screams 'magical girl'?!"
Mitsuhiko gave him a sympathetic look. "I understand how you feel, Mr. Mouri. I also..."
"Pfft—" Conan, who had been listening quietly, couldn't hold it in any longer. The mental image of Kogoro in the frilly dress sent him into a fit of suppressed giggles.
"What are you laughing at, you brat?!"
"Nothing..." Conan said quickly, covering his mouth.
"He's imagining you in the skirt," Haibara supplied helpfully.
"Haibara, you traitor!"
"Why you little—!" Kogoro brought his fist down on Conan's head with a satisfying BONK.
"Ow, ow, ow!" Conan yelped, nursing the new lump on his head.
"Still," Kogoro sighed, "the ability to see the truth of a case is useful. But having to change into that every time..."
"Then why did you make the contract in the first place?" Mitsuhiko asked.
"Well... I was stuck on the Fujiwara case, and that white thing showed up and said it could let me see everything... plus, after I made the wish, I got a whole case of limited-edition whiskey..."
Haibara arched an eyebrow. "So you sold your soul for booze?"
The revelation hit Conan. That's why he was carrying that case of whiskey home! I just thought a colleague gave it to him!
Kogoro coughed awkwardly. "Ahem... it was a vintage collection! And the case-solving part was the main thing! That was the important part!"
"Regardless, this is getting strange," Haibara said, her tone serious again. "Kyubey has made three contracts in a very short time. There are probably more that we don't know about. It has to have some larger goal."
"More contractors means things are about to get complicated," Conan agreed.
Kogoro took a sip of his coffee, his expression troubled. "I just want to know if there's a way to transform without having to wear that stupid outfit."
"As far as I know... no," Haibara replied.
"Well, can I at least find a more private place to change next time?"
A beat of silence passed, and then, improbably, the three of them started to laugh, the tension finally breaking.
Back at the precinct, Sato and Takagi were filing the last of the case reports.
"Hey, have you heard?" Sato said, lowering her voice. "The legend of Mr. Mouri's restroom."
Takagi leaned in, intrigued. "What legend?"
"They say that before he solves any case, he has to go to the restroom for a few minutes. He goes in stumped and comes out a genius." Sato grinned. "And I think the Inspector finally learned the secret today."
"Maybe it's some kind of special crime-solving ritual?" Takagi mused.
"What I want to know," Sato said, a mischievous glint in her eye, "is why the Inspector was guarding the door like his life depended on it. Maybe we should burst in next time and find out for ourselves?"
They both shared a wicked smile.