Keifer's PoV
Two weeks.
Its been two weeks since she let me stay. Since we stopped bleeding over each other and started stitching things up in silence, in small touches, in moments that didn't demand forgiveness but something softer—grace.
I still can't believe it. I—I am gonna be dad!!! She already told me this weeks ago…but today I saw it with my own eyes.
A test. Two red lines. Hidden in the washroom be behind the cotton swabs…..
—
She hasn't forgiven me yet.
I haven't asked again.
Maybe this is what we need. Peace. Silence. Most of all our love, in a way which matters, which heals, which silently shouts that she cares. And I love it. Her. I love the way in which she conveys that she's still there and wasn't gonna leave.
Some days, we talk like nothing broke. Some nights she still cries thinking I'm asleep. I say nothing, just pull her closer. Hoping my heartbeat would convey the words I couldn't say.
"Keifer…" she hesitates "It's not a fluke. I'm actually pregnant"
"I know, baby" I whispered "I found the test"
I move aside so she can sit….and she did. Leaning her head on my chest. She says "This feels....different. But in a good way"
"Everything is different, darling. And it's beautiful that way" I said looking at her.
"Stop staring" she said as if she felt my gaze. Maybe she did.
"I love you" the words escaped my mouth before I knew it.
She turned towards me. Eyes meeting mine. And faint smile on her lips that undid me. I looked away beforehand..cause if I didn't I'd probably be fucking her right now, forgetting the fact that she's pregnant already.
Jay's PoV
I felt his gaze before I saw it.
That quite heavy stare that always seemed to find me like memorising everything he was afraid to lose again.
When he said 'I love you' it hit different this time. Not rushed, not desperate like it had weight now. Like it was from something finally real.
God, I want to say it back
But the words got stuck somewhere between my throat and my chest.
Because I do love him, I never stopped. Even when I hated him. When I wanted to walk away but couldn't. When I promised myself I wouldn't forgive him. When I wanted him to feel what I felt—I still loved him.
Now I'm just sitting here. Hearing his heartbeat like a drum beneath my ear. I realised I missed this peace. This kind that makes your heart ache. The kind wher nothing needs to be fixed now…..just held.
His arm is around me. Tracing idle shapes on the shoulder. He doesn't push or say anything. Just lets me breath.
"I'm scared" I whispered finally
"And I'm not going anywhere" he said voice firm.
The way he said. God. It made something unclench inside that I haven't felt for weeks.
And maybe this is it. As he kisses my temple I realise something: maybe forgiving isn't a grand event…it's when we realise we're ready.....
Maybe it's this, the quite promise of staying day after day even when its hard