It's been two days since the end of the singularity.
Ritsuka strolled along the white halls of Chaldea, a somewhat upbeat hum accompanying her steps.
She had a very productive two days. Namely, she slept and she ate. Ate a lot. Couldn't be more productive, in her opinion.
Romani prescribed her some sleep meds, like always - to get a good rest after the singularity - unbothered by the nightmares that might have come with it.
Her eyes widened a bit. She'll have to go through another psychological evaluation, now that she thought about it. It was…
She stopped cupping her chin in thought, trying to remember her schedule.
Around the day after tomorrow, when Roman had more time to actually function like a human being, and not as a paperwork-filling robot. She nodded to herself, but then her face soured. Speaking of paperwork, she'll have to write that after-action report soon… joy.
She shook her head, banishing these thoughts. That's for the future her to figure out. The present her needed to get to the command room for that debrief they've been postponing for the last few days.
Speaking of, here's the door.
It wooshed to the left, giving the Master the view of the entire area. Most of the non-essential staff had some vacation days. Probably why it looked a bit more barren than usual.
Her ears perked up as she heard a barely audible yawn and a click of a mug being put down.
She walked further and wouldn't you know it…
"Hey, Da Vinci!" Ritsuka smiled slightly, the disheveled yet elegant form of the inventor at full display.
"Ritsuka," the chair turned, exposing the picture-perfect beauty and a mischievous glint in the eye, as she observed the last master. "Sleeping well?"
"More or less," Ritsuka shrugged.
"I've heard of the feast that you forced Emiya to make," Da Vinci smiled with her eyes, her hand stretched to get that cup of coffee. "Your voraciousness can rival that of Arturia's".
A shadow took hold of Ritsuka's eyes for a moment, but then disappeared.
The King of Knights wasn't dead. Yes, she is probably out of commission for some time, but alive. That's all that matters.
She breathed out the tension, with Da Vinci slightly wincing, probably after noting her mistake.
"Just between you and me," but Ritsuka didn't want to drag the mood down, "I'll make him do it again when she is up and about."
Master smiled deviously, imagining the face of the Archer as she put Arturia in front of him and said 'Feed her'.
Priceless. Totally priceless.
Even if she had to go through some supply runs to make that happen.
"That would be your present, right?" Inventor asked, covering a small smile with a cup.
"Right. Gifting servants something for a job well done is a very good tradition, after all," Ritsuka nodded.
"Well then, I…" just as Da Vinci wanted to say something, the door opened, inviting in two people.
"Senpai," Mash entered, her eyes straying to the red-head straight away.
"Mash!" Ritsuka couldn't help herself. She took Mash into a tight embrace, which was promptly returned.
"Hello, Ritsuka," said Roman, a fatherly smile plastered on his tired face.
"Hi Romani."
The man hummed, and briskly walked to the chair next to Da Vinci. Or to the cup next to it, more precisely.
By the time he took a long sip out of it, Master-Demi-Servant duo were already ready to listen.
"Alright, we'll keep this brief," Roman said, taking the clipboard off the table, "The fifth singularity, or what I called it 'E pluribus unum' was a success."
Contained applause rang out from the duo.
"A cool name, Roman," Ritsuka commented.
"Yeah, I know, " the doctor smiled at his naming sense being complemented for once. But then his voice took a turn for the serious. "Okay, down to business. You've been there, and you know what happened for the most part. We'll discuss the more… important parts."
With a clank, Da Vinci put her cup down, her eyes gaining that serious edge.
"Abnormalities," her eyes were piercing as she continued to explain, "A previously unknown phenomena. We have a very limited understanding of what they are and what they can do. From the words of Roland, they are usually immortal and are usually representations of human emotions, trauma or stories. On our side, we can say that they possess a saint graph like heroic spirits, but lack the connection to the throne."
"And are very much killable," Roman continued with a nod.
"The question now is… do we mention them in the reports?" Da Vinci asked, deep in thought.
Ritsuka frowned, Mash's lips thinned, Roman grimaced,
Something of clearly mystical nature and unexplored. That's all it took for the magi to swarm in like a bunch of hyenas. Not the brightest of prospects, to be honest.
Romani, for his part, couldn't help but wonder if anyone would believe after-action reports he had been faithfully writing. Because with each passing day, they've been growing more and more ridiculous.
Some unknown entities beyond their comprehension appearing didn't help their case.
"Did Roland mention anything else about these creatures?" Da Vinci asked, her eyes on Ritsuka.
"Mmm, he did alright…" Ritsuka's browns creased even more, remembering that story in particular.
She told the abridged version. There once was this corp, it did this, wanted to do that. Discovered this and made it the means to that. Could also do this and that with it.
Dry, but to the point.
"There is a problem with that story," Romani pointed out after a few seconds, "He didn't say how Abnormalities were made."
Ritsuka scrolled that conversation in her mind and yes, she didn't ask. She had a distinct feeling that she didn't want to either.
"Probably something gruesome," she waved that off. And while she said 'probably' she had a feeling that it was 100% gruesome. "You can ask Roland himself. I think he'll be open to that discussion. I don't really wanna know," she admitted easily.
"Well, I guess I'll have a perfect opportunity to ask when I'll be discharging him today." Roman pondered out loud.
"Oh, he is already good to go?" she asked, leaning forward.
"'Good to go?' He has extensive injuries and his saint graph.. It's a miracle he is still alive. Also, did you know that he can't take on spirit form?"
That was news for her.
"Nope."
"Well, he can't. Which is very, very weird," Doc then turned to Da Vinci, "Any ideas?"
Inventor scratched her chin but came up with nothing.
"Nothing for now. I'll see what I can find on it in the archives."
"Em, Doctor. You said he has extensive injuries… how bad was it?" asked Mash innocently.
Roman huffed, fighting an internal battle.
"I think this can be considered a breach of patient-doctor confidentiality. But as a Master, you should probably know."
Doc stood up and started pointing out the damage on his own body.
"First, extensive internal injuries." he petted his abdomen, "Organs, other than heart - ruptured into bloody mush."
RItsuka shivered. Roman himself looked beyond uncomfortable saying everything, but moved on.
"Then, numerous holes in his back, shoulder, legs, stomach. They were about this size in length" he showed the length of about 4cm with his fingers, on his stomach "And this big in diameter, three centimeters, more or less."
Ritsuka nodded grimly.
"His head… is untouched. Honestly, he was lucky that it wasn't. I think his spirit core wouldn't be able to withstand that. Otherwise…" Doctors' lips thinned. Everyone present understood what that was supposed to mean.
"Not to mention, the curse."
"He was cursed?!" her anger flared as her jaw slackened.
THAT GODDAMN IDIOT! He did good on his promise but returned half-alive!
"Yeah. Paracelseus and I did our best. In the end, we had to resort to Martha's and Jeanne's power as saints. It's washed out of his system now, thankfully."
"Whoooh" Ritsuka sighed in relief. That guy is getting an earful, that's for sure.
"Why are you letting him go, then?"
"He is 'mostly' alright. He can't eat, because his stomach is still nonexistent. But we patched up the holes in him, applied some healing magecraft with Paracelseus' help and he managed to wake up yesterday in the evening. So, there is no point in keeping him there. Just gotta give him time to heal fully and enough mana to do so… Speaking of."
The man eyed his coffee chugging colleague.
"When will you hook up the grail to the generators?"
"Soon. All is going as planned," Da Vinci nodded confidently. "Come tomorrow, and we can summon or resummon more people."
Ritsuka straightened out at the mention, her eyes zoning in on Da Vinci.
Who shook her head remorsefully.
"I'm sorry, but it seems that resummoning Cu and Jack won't be possible. And while Cu's saint graph disappearing can be attributed to the similarity of his killer or the fatality of the attack, Jack… From Robin's account, it seems that Abnormalities can completely destroy the saint graphs."
"Another unfortunate quality that we have recorded," Roman nodded, head hung as he leaned on the table.
She clenched her fists. Mash noticed, and put a hand on her shoulder, reassuringly.
Her voice came out more subdued, "Any more bad news?"
"Well… There's the stunt you pulled at the end." Roman pointed out, sounding rather displeased, but not too much.
Mash prepared to stand up and defend her friend. Her eyes were gentle but firm.
"Easy, easy, he-hem" he pacified the two with his hands and a small chuckle, "It worked out. Even if it was a bit too dangerous for my liking."
"We will all discuss this at a later date, when the nerves cool down a bit more," Da Vinci put her foot down, noting the not-so-subtle unrest.
Everyone was good with that solution. For now.
"However, what we need right now is more information. Abnormalities fit with their name rather well. We cannot predict their powers or appearances. Or even why and how they appear in a singularity. Preferably, we might also want to summon someone who could be proficient at dealing with them," Da Vinci reasoned out loud.
"Which leads us back to Roland," Ritsuka let out a bark of laughter.
How this guy could get himself tangled up in so much mess was beyond her.
That's some Emiya level luck, honestly. Oh, right, E.
"It would be nice to know more about his Noble Phantasm as well. Turning people into books sounds…"
"Interesting," Da Vinci ended the sentence for Roman, before he said something potentially stupid.
"Right."
"I'll ask him as soon as I get the opportunity," Ritsuka promised.
She wanted to know more about it herself. Why did he want to fight the two so desperately? He also mentioned someone else living there.
"Okay, last on the agenda. This," Roman pointed at the red wristband on RItsuka's hand.
"Oh right," Ritsuka inspected a piece of clothing given to her by the abnormality.
Which she forgot to put on this morning. She was pretty sure she forgot, at least. To be fair, it was given to her by a reality-defying monstrosity. Expecting it to be normal was a bit far-fetched.
"I'd suggest you take it off so we can test it. Or research its effects on people in general," Roman said.
"Yeah, about that, it seems to be… always with me."
Roman and Da Vinci simultaneously tilted their heads.
"I forgot to put this on this morning. It's supposed to be in my room."
Now they just frowned.
"Here, let us check…" Doctor tried to untie the thing from her wrist but was left unsuccessful, his fingers slipping off of it.
"Ha-ha-khm," Da Vinci along with Mash stifled a laugh. Ritsuka was just smiling mischievously at the fruitless attempts.
She will absolutely prank some people using this.
"Can you, uh…" looking uncomfortable, Doctor asked to untie it.
And lo and behold, it was in her hand.
"This was humorous, but what was that for?" Da Vinci asked, brows arched in amusement.
"Right-right, can you put it in this drawer, please?" he motioned the Master to put it in the drawer some tables away.
She did so and after returning to her place, Romani opened the drawer wide.
To discover nothing.
To say they were all… stumped, would be an understatement.
"Can you check your pockets, Ritsuka?" Da Vinci asked.
And in her trousers' pocket here it was. In all of its tarnished, red glory.
"This is weird," Roman stated, dumbfounded.
"Indeed. Wonder how it does that…" Da Vinci sipped what was left of her coffee, hardly bothered by this.
"Have you felt anything weird? Tendencies that weren't there before?" Roman was back in the doctor mode in a heartbeat.
"Nope…"
Da Vinci cut him off, "We really ought to just ask Roland about everything."
"I guess. Alright, with this, we can probably adjourn this meeting. Thanks for coming, everyone."
"I'll be back to work, then. Come say hi if you feel lonely, Ritsuka, Mash."
"Sure thing," Ritsuka smiled sincerely and left the room, Mash in tow.
They went to the cafeteria straight away - to celebrate (again) the successful end of the singularity.
Emiya threw in the towel as soon as he saw them entering the cafeteria, retreating deep into the kitchen promptly, where nothing could hurt him. Leaving Boudica to the metaphorical wolves.
And what you need to know about Mash - it takes quite a bit to sustain being a demi-servant. So, they had a hearty meal, drank some good tea. Rightfully enjoyed themselves.
Eventually took their leave - Ritsuka intent (and very eager) to go meet Roland and express her deep and heartfelt dissatisfaction with his antics…
Except it all went horribly wrong.
Mash's hand fell onto Ritsuka's shoulder, as Master struggled to support the full weight of the girl.
Her eyes darted to the Shielder's face. She was deathly pale, blood leaking from her nose and…
Her body worked faster than her mind - Ritsuka wrapped Mash's hand around her neck, supporting her with the other as she pulled her closer to herself.
Mind caught up. Panic flooded in. Her eyes were instinctively drawn to Mash again.
Shielder's eyes were bloodshot, red leaking out of the corners, with the alarming amount of blood now trickling down from her mouth as well.
Panic set in. Sticky, cold and oppressing - fear took hold of her mind.
'Help. I need help. Really, really…' she thought weakly, her eyes darting frantically from one end of the corridor to another, any semblance of composure - gone.
But responding to her mental state, the seals on her hand lit up with a deep crimson glow, and the one person she thought of the last, appeared in her mind's eye.
'Roland… to me.'
*****
A few minutes earlier.
The Patron Librarian of the floor of General works was feeling… weird. As in, not having a stomach - weird. It was, funnily enough, weirder than not having hands or legs but inconvenienced him even more than he thought it could.
He was kinda missing those K Corp. capsules, to be honest. The ease at which you could get your missing anything back was something he grew to miss only recently.
But, well, even though it was making his life slightly uncomfortable - he wasn't too bothered by it.
"Alright, Paracelseus, I'll be off. Thanks for taking care of me," Fixer said. He sat straight on the bed, buttoned up his jacket, fixed his tie, made himself presentable and stood up, ready to go and dig into that library.
"You are very welcome. But remember…"
"'Don't strain yourself too much.' Yeah, Doc, I heard you the first couple of times," Roland waved the concern off, walking to the door. It's not like he would be getting into the thick of it anytime soon.
Alchemist leveled Roland with a stare that just screamed doubt.
To him, Roland seemed like one of those people to get into trouble no matter where they went.
"Very well. I hope not to see you here anytime soon," Paracelseus nodded.
Roland leaned on the door frame, a cocky smile plastered on his face.
"It's mutual, beli…"
The space warped and Roland disappeared, just like that.
A dead eyed stare permeated the area where Pretender stood just a second ago.
Then, a long sigh.
Without haste, the Alchemist stood up and started preparing the needed equipment.
He had a distinct feeling that a new patient was soon to arrive.
*****
"eve me…" Roland said, the rest of his sentence, the smile dropping as soon as he saw what was happening in front of him.
Droplets of blood looked surreal on the white floor.
Mash was about to fall down, only barely held by Ritsuka.
And the Master herself - looked like the world itself was crashing down on her - eyes glassy and whatever semblance of calm long forgone.
A second of stupor was all that he could afford himself, before he skipped to the duo - taking Mash from Ritsuka's shaky hands.
His hand automatically reached for the Shielder's wrist.
"Pulse slow, too slow."
He stood still for a moment, trying to catch a sound.
"Breathing shallow"
His hand stopped on her forehead.
"She is fucking freezing."
She gave her a once over.
"No bodily injuries. She is pretty pale though."
His verdict?
"I have no fucking clue what's happening," he said, frowning, picking the girl up gently in a princess carry and swiftly going for the nearest elevator.
Ritsuka followed suit, her mind finally catching a break, regaining some of her faculties.
Not ten seconds later, Roland slammed the elevator button, which thankfully opened straight away.
Ritsuka flew in and Roland closed the doors.
The tense silence that followed made Fixer once again lament the absence of those fucking K Corp. capsules.
Ritsuka, meanwhile, was frantically looking Mash over.
But, the chime of a bell brought him out of his thoughts and he took off to the infirmary, leaving Master in the dust.
Roman was already there, having just returned from his break.
"Mash!" he exclaimed as soon as he saw her and his brain short-circuited mid step.
"Put the patient here!" Paracelseus noticed the gap and prompted Roland to put Mash on the bed, all while giving Roman a glare.
That brought the man back to his senses.
"Her condition?" Roman recovered, and asked in a commanding tone.
He strode quickly and approached a line of drawers, taking out equipment for every kind of measurement. Magical or otherwise.
"Body temperature low, pulse slowed. No injuries," Roland reported.
No response came, instead, the Doctor started to put all kinds of electronics on Shielder's body.
"Please, leave," Paracelseus asked, their eyes crossing, "I'll notify you if anything happens."
"Right," Roland nodded, walking over to the door, where Ritsuka had only just appeared. She breathed raggedly, eyes scanning the room before stopping abruptly at the pale frame of Mash.
Master stared unblinkingly at her friend, her posture screaming worry - hunched, biting on her thumb, leg trembling slightly.
For a second, Roland hesitated on what to do. His eyes crossed with Paracelseus again, and a slight nod was his answer. He took Ritsuka beneath the armpits and carried out of the room.
The reaction was as violent as you would expect.
"HEY! Put me down!" she tried to struggle out of his grip to no avail, "I need to be there for her! HEY!"
"Easy-easy!" he leaned his head back, letting the fist pass a centimeter shy of his nose, "Paracelsues said to vacate the premises!
She started to thrash even more, obviously refusing to hear him.
"Hey, it's gonna be alright. Roman has things under control," he tried to talk to her again.
For a second he could feel this phantom itch of emotion but he didn't really have a moment to dwell on it.
The Master still didn't let up.
"She's going to be alright, Ritsuka, just give it a little bit of time," he put as much sincerity and care in his voice as he could.
The response was a polar opposite.
"LET ME GO, ROLAND!" she started hitting anywhere else, and Roland, being unable to subdue her, decided to do the next best thing.
Allow her to tire herself.
A fist to the nose, a kick to the shin. A poke in the eye, a barrage of hits on the shoulder, neck and chest.
They didn't do damage (although he felt that poke) but he stoically endured Master's hits.
When she had no strength to hit, she struggled. When she had no strength to do that, she tried to break his hold.
"Haaa, haaaa, haaaa…" all eventually leading to exhaustion,
Roland felt like a total dick for doing this. But he couldn't just allow the girl to barge in either.
"You all calmed down there?"
"Put me… haaa, down. Wooooh," she breathed out the long sigh, tenseness leaving her, somewhat. "You can put me down now."
She said it with a scowl, but everything else in her expression screamed vulnerable to him. Like she was on the verge of breaking down.
Roland quirked a brow.
"You promise that you won't do something potentially stupid?" he mirrored her approach and asked again, tone slightly playful in a fruitless attempt to alleviate some tension.
She leered at him, her eyes flashing with that helpless anger, but nodded.
Suddenly, whatever playfulness he had sipped out at a bad premonition. Slowly, he put her on the ground. She stood there, silent and motionless for a few seconds, her bangs obscuring her eyes.
Then, she turned around, fists clenched.
"Tell me if she comes around," she spit out through tensed lips, and started walking.
As she turned the corner, he noticed her shuddering violently with her entire body.
…
He scratched the back of his head, looking slightly downcast. Then, sighed.
Well, he fucked up.
*****
Roland sat in a chair near Mash's bed, his diary sprawled on his knees.
His eyes involuntarily reached for the electronic clock on the table. It's been… around five hours since he and Ritsuka had their moment.
For that duration, he tried, repeatedly, to talk with Ritsuka through the link but was ignored.
His eyes then stayed on the medicine on the table near him, pulling his thoughts with him.
For the last four hours, the duo of medics were running around, trying to figure out what had happened. Obviously, they didn't tell him a thing, referencing that doctor-patient confidentiality thing he only heard existed in Nests.
When the two made sure that Mash was in a stable enough state to be left alone for some minutes - they took a break.
Roland just so happened to be under the infirmary's doors when that happened, and was tasked with keeping an eye out.
When he raised the topic of Ritsuka, Roman, frowning guiltily, said that the patient needed rest, so - no visitors just yet.
Roland didn't find it in himself to go against the person who stitched him up, so, here he was - standing vigil.
He cracked his neck, did some circular motions with his arms - getting some pops in response. Then, he sat comfortably and skimmed over what he had already written. Which wasn't a lot.
He stared at a half-blank page. Today, writing-wise, just wasn't his day. Whenever he tried to write, thoughts would intrude and the words just wouldn't go out. He had spent the last forty minutes trying to power through this torture but… no success there.
His mind turned to the one responsible for his mental disarray. And how he felt about the argument they had. Really, the similarity of it managed to sent ripples through his mind, bringing bad memories to light.
…He could bet that Oliver saw the same fervor in him the day Angelica died. When he pushed through the lines of Zwei to go and kill the accursed Pianist. To find out if Angelica survived.
No, back at the time, he was thinking that she did. How could she not? It couldn't have possibly happened to him, right?
He scowled as his mood went down the drain.
Breathe in…
For a second, he turned to his senses. The repeated *peep* of equipment, the strong scent of spirit and that smell of a hospital. The blinding white of everything around.
Breathe out…
In this whole situation, he was just glad that it didn't turn ugly. And, judging by what Roman had to say - there won't be any funerals in the near future, so it could be said that the worst that could happen - didn't.
Breathe in… breathe out.
With his thoughts in order again, he decided to just read what he had written already.
Liu association and Xiao. Thumb, Index and Yan. Blue Sicko. He still haven't gotten around to Purple Tear or Red Mist. Or R. Corp. To be fair, that last one was fairly uneventful, so he was a bit too lazy to write it. The only higlight was Gebura going solo on them.
He turned through the pages, until he reached his latest entries.
Realization of the Floor of Language was already done. What he wrote next, and what he was writing now, was… Realization of the Floor of Social Sciences.
There wasn't any particular order to these. They were all done one after another, however, there was no need to keep to any strict line-up here. So he wrote Gebura's floor first.
His brows turned downwards involuntarily. The meeting with the two Abnos didn't leave a good taste in his mouth. It felt, at least, that he could've done something more. That despite his reluctance, he should have offered more help. If City's cycle could be broken, then the hatred, dictated to these two by their nature - was something above his pay grade.Still, it made him think of the time he spent with Chesed, leading to this half-filled page.
He twirled the pan in his hand dexterously, eyes fixed on the last line he had written.
"Ghm…" a small moan echoed through the room.
Roland's eyes darted to the right, noticing the slight wince on the Shielder's face, before her eyes gradually opened.
"Senpai…" was the first word she uttered.
"Sorry to disappoint," he said with a faux-apology and a smirk, "But it's just a little ol' me."
"Ah, Roland-san," the young girl muttered, her eyes following the direction of the sound, "Is Senpai alright."
His brows went up, despite himself.
"Jeez, you black out and the first thing you ask if another person is alright…" he shook his head. Though, the caring nature of this kid made warmth spread in his chest. You don't meet people like her in the City.
"And to answer your question - yes, she is alright. Lost her marbles for a second. A bit shocked, maybe, but she is alright."
A sigh of relief.
"I should say sorry for worrying her later…"
Roland shrugged.
She wouldn't be the only one saying sorry.
"Oh, right," he pressed a button on the communicator on his wrist and made a call. "Roman, this is Roland."
"What's the matter? Did something happen?" the Doctor's voice came out slightly worried, despite Roland's leisurely tone.
"Easy doc. She woke up," he said, and turned to Mash in case she wanted anything to say.
"Mash is awake?!" however, on the other side, a familiar voice exclaimed.
Roland stilled. Why were the two together?
"I'll be there in a bit, Roland. In fifteen minutes, after I explain something to Ritsuka. Is Mash stable?"
Roland looked at the equipment. Looking over the monitors, he could see her blood pressure, pulse, body temperature. Those seemed stable. Slightly below norm, maybe - but stable.
The other three screens, though? He had no idea. With all of these graphs and lines, he really didn't know where to look. It didn't blink red. It didn't make too much noise either. So, he guessed everything was alright.
"Think so."
"Good. I'll be with you in a bit. Paracelseus should arrive soon as well."
The feed cut off and the two servants were left to wait.
Mash stared blankly at the ceiling. Her expression seemed so much more… listless. Like life was drained from her.
And here he was - looking at her, when she was clearly not alright. Thinking that maybe, it could just pass over if he waited long enough.
The ugly emotion squirmed in his gut. With it, a part of him that just didn't want to get involved with others acted up.
Who was he to ask? To give advice? To break into her…
Instead of asking useless questions, he did the only thing he knew how to do right.
He acted.
"Are you ill, Mash?"
"Hm?" the girl turned to him slightly, some life returning to her features.
In her lavender eyes he could see the struggle.
To tell or not to tell?
"Yes," she nodded lightly. "It's a rather lengthy story… I can tell you most of it later, maybe," she smiled demurely, "You see, I… was created by human hands. A designer baby. For the purpose of housing a heroic spirit."
He couldn't help the surprise creeping up his face. Wow, this is some Wing level shit right here.
"And… Mmm, you are probably not familiar with the term. But, like homunculi, I have a very limited lifespan. Which is set to expire soon," she smiled. She had just confessed that she was going to die, and she gave him a small smile. It was sad. It was light. It was resigned.
Being a cityfolk treated him to many sights. But the sight of such an innocent and, dare he say it, kind girl smiling like that… It unsettled him. Deeply.
A question, prompted more by his own experience, slipped through.
"And…" some seconds later he found his voice again, "What do you want to make of this life? Like, what do you want to do, or…" he motioned with his hand.
The question left his lips without his conscious effort.
"Mmm, I think I want to help Senpai save humanity. To spend the rest of this journey with her."
Something rubbed him the wrong way in this answer. Something…
His eyes were hooked by the notebook in his lap. Of course…
"You know, a good friend of mine once said that a human can't live without expectations."
Her head perked up.
"Expectations?"
"Yes. That tomorrow is going to be better than today. That humans can do - be better. But what's even more important - we all hold different expectations for this life we live and you Mash… You make it sound as if this entire thing IS your life. Like it's going to end with it."
The subtle black peered into the gentle lavender.
"I… Want to see the world outside Chaldea one day," she confessed in a whisper, looking a bit dispirited, "I know that it's unlikely, but… I would really like to look at the sky of the world that me and Senpai saved. At the world that I never had a chance to experience."
She turned to look at him, and Roland could see it clear as day.
Will. Undeniable, unbreakable.
It put a smile on his face.
"Not that's more like it, chump!" he petted her shoulder lightly, a lively smile plastered on his face.
And he could admit to himself that the tiny blush she showed afterwards was adorable.
"Don't worry if it sounds unfeasible. Just… believe it. That's all that matters," he added.
She smiled again. A lot more alive, this time. Then, her eyes twinkled with curiosity.
"Ano, Roland-san, what is… no, what was your expectation?"
"Hm…" he tilted his head, "I dunno."
And shrugged.
"Don't think I've got it, still. I have an outline, but nothing concrete."
The girl was… flabbergasted.
"Don't look at me like that," he said, stifling a laugh at her expression, "I might not have it, but it doesn't stop me from searching for it."
His smile, as he said that, was easy-going, carefree. You could say he was content with not knowing. Content with searching for it.
His ear twitched.
"Well, I'll be going. It was nice chatting with you. Take care of yourself, ok?" he said offhandedly, picking up his diary and putting it in his gloves, "Talk to you later."
As he said that, the door opened and Roman stormed in, passing Roland by and quickly approaching the patient.
Fixer smirked to himself again and left without saying anything more.
He really wanted to finish writing Chesed's realization and start writing Tiphereth's. He had found his inspiration.