The moment Kai's voice exploded, "Have you lost your mind?" the whole road went still for Alina. His hands were gripping her shoulders so tightly that she could feel his pulse vibrating through his fingertips. His chest was rising and falling rapidly as if he had run miles to reach her, breath warm on her face, adrenaline still rushing through him.
"You should have been looking where you were walking!" he shouted again, shaking her once, sharp, breathless, terrified.
Alina couldn't breathe properly. Everything had happened too fast: the screech of the car, the rush of air, the sharp crack of her phone hitting the road… and now Kai's hand gripping her, pulling her straight into him.
Her head had collided with his chest so hard that for a second her vision blurred. She could still hear the echo of the near-accident ringing in her ears, louder than Kai's actual shouting.
Her heart wasn't beating; it was hammering, slamming against her ribs like it was trying to escape her body. Her palms were cold. Her throat locked. Her knees felt like they might give up any second.
And Kai… Kai was the last face she expected to see when she opened her eyes again. The same person who pushed her away. Who hurt her without even blinking? Who left her with that pain and didn't look back? And now he was holding her like she was something fragile.
Now he was yelling as he cared. Now his hand was on her head like he was shielding something precious.
It didn't make sense. None of it made sense. If he wanted to hurt me, why was he here acting as if I mattered? If he didn't care, why did he look furious at the thought of losing me? If he felt something, then why did he break me first? She was battling with her thoughts.
Her breath trembled. Her mind was still stuck on the moment the car almost hit her, that flash where she thought, This is it. She could've died. And the first person she saw after surviving… was the same man who had been the reason for so much of her pain.
Everything inside her was shaking with fear, anger, confusion, the overwhelming shock of almost losing her life… and somewhere beneath all of that, the ache of seeing him again.
And then she finally looked up into his eyes. And that only made the storm inside her worse. Her heart cracked. Her eyes narrowed. Her body stiffened.
"So what, huh?" she shot back, angry tears threatening to spill. "What's the problem if something happened to me?!"
And before he could react, she shoved him hard, pushing both her palms against his chest with all the force of every emotion she'd been holding inside for days. Kai stumbled a step back.
Alina's voice broke. "Isn't that what you want?"
Her chest was heaving, breaths uneven, the sting of his earlier words still in her bones. "Just say it, Kai. Say it. Say that if something happened to me, it would be good for you."
His jaw tightened too tightly, his fists clenching so hard that the veins on his arms stood out. He didn't answer. He couldn't. His throat felt locked, like speaking would tear it open.
When he didn't reply, her laugh came out broken "It doesn't matter to you, right? You don't care."
Her voice trembled, wet, shattered, "You never care."
Her tears finally fell hot, quick, uncontrollable. Her hair was messy, sticking to her cheeks, and her lips shook as she spoke. "You push me away whenever you want… and then suddenly you show up and do things like this. Why?"
He looked at her, and for a moment his heartbeat stopped. She was standing there like someone whose entire world had cracked open. Her mascara slightly smudged. Her breathing is uneven. Her eyes filled with pain; she had no reason to hide.
He stepped forward, driven by an instinct, a helpless one, and placed his palm on her shoulder. But she flinched and stepped back.
"Don't," she whispered.
And for the first time, Kai didn't know what to do. He opened his mouth, but no words came. His throat felt thick, like emotion was choking him. He had hurt her, really hurt her, and that reality was eating him alive. He ran a frustrated hand through his hair, gripping it tightly.
"Damn it," he muttered under his breath.
She noticed his right hand, which moved up, wrapped in a fresh medical bandage. Thick white gauze circling his palm all the way to his wrist.
Her eyes froze. It was the same hand… the same hand that twisted her wrist, the same hand that held her, the same hand that pulled her from the road, the same hand that was now injured…
Before she could ask him what happened, before she could speak even a single word, he turned away like he couldn't face her anymore. Like staying another second would destroy him.
Her voice came weak. "Kai—"
He didn't stop. He kept walking, brisk and stiff, his shoulders tense, his jaw set, and disappeared toward the black-tinted car parked ahead. Her breath shook painfully. The moment he left, everything around her suddenly felt louder: the vehicles, the voices, the world while she stood there alone at the edge of the road.
For a long second, she didn't move. Then her eyes fell on the broken phone lying on the asphalt. The screen was smashed into a spiderweb of glass. Pieces of the frame were scattered. The phone was destroyed.
She knelt on the road, unbothered about the dust, the dirt, or the people passing, and slowly collected every broken piece. Her fingers trembled as she picked them up. Her breaths came in quick, shaky gasps. She held the shattered phone in both her hands and stared at it through blurry eyes.
This phone… the one she held just moments ago, the one she never dropped, was now lying in pieces… just like her. Her tears fell onto the broken screen. She wiped them quickly, but more kept coming.
Ryan had already pulled up beside Kai the moment he stormed off. Without saying a word, Kai opened the passenger door and slid inside. He slammed the door shut, exhaling sharply through his nose.
Ryan glanced at him from the driver's seat. Kai didn't look back. He didn't say a single word. His jaw was locked so tightly it looked painful. His fingers were curled and trembling ever so slightly. His breathing was heavy, quiet, yet deep as if he was fighting to control himself.
Ryan didn't ask what happened. He didn't dare to ask him. He shifted gears and pulled the car forward. Kai turned his head slightly toward the window… then froze. Because there she was.
Alina. Bent down on the road, hair falling over her face, hands trembling as she picked up the broken pieces of her phone. The wind brushed her hair aside, and he could see the redness in her eyes, the tears on her cheeks.
She looked… miserable. A sight that stabbed Kai's chest like a knife. His heartbeat stuttered. Ryan continued driving slowly to merge into traffic, giving Kai one more second, just one or more, maybe he had done it intentionally, sensing that Kai wasn't ready to look away.
Kai didn't blink. He stared at her through the glass, through the distance, through the safety of the car, eyes fixed, unmovable. Her small figure crouched on the road. Her trembling hands. Her wounded expression. Her broken phone. Her broken heart.
His breath hitched, a soft inhale that he immediately swallowed down. His throat tightened painfully. His hand, the bandaged one, curled into a fist on his knee. He still didn't say a word.
Ryan briefly met Kai's eyes in the rear-view mirror but said nothing. The look on Kai's face was raw, harsh, and hurting. The car rolled forward. Kai's eyes stayed on Alina. Even when the car turned, even when she faded into the distance, even when she could no longer be seen, Kai kept staring at the spot where she had been. Silently. Tormented. Punishing himself with every second.
He leaned his head back against the seat, exhaling shakily through his nose, but his eyes remained open, burning with a truth he refused to say out loud. He cared. More than he should. More than he wanted. More than he could control.