The hall of Hades was no place for the living. Obsidian walls drank the torchlight, their black fire hissing in the silence. Bone pillars curved like ribs above the throne, a cage of stone and shadow.
At its foot, the Furies groveled, wings pressed flat, claws scraping bronze.
"Lord Hades," Alecto rasped, every word ash in her throat. "We have failed. The daughter of Zeus, Thalia Grace has reached the camp."
Silence.
Then the throne cracked.
Black onyx split under Hades' grip, fissures spiderwebbing out like veins of lightning frozen in stone. His eyes flared golden, casting the chamber in a sickly glow.
"Failed."
The word rolled like a tombstone dropped on the world.
"Do you know what you've cost me?" His voice rose, each syllable thick with centuries of chained rage.
He stood. The air curdled. His cloak tore upward, a storm of wailing shades spilling from its folds. The ground shuddered beneath his boots.
"That girl is proof! Proof of Zeus' treachery!" His voice thundered now, booming against the hollow vaults. "He swore as I swore. Swore upon the Styx, oath binding, eternal, and unbreakable that we would sire no children. And what does he do? He takes a mortal to his bed. He spawns another bastard. He breaks the pact! And Olympus?! Olympus turns its head!"
The Furies clawed the floor, wings quaking.
"When Maria bore me children," Hades roared, "what did Zeus do? Did he summon me to council? Did he speak as a brother?" His hand slashed the air. "No. He cast down lightning. He smote them in their beds! Maria, my beloved, burned alive. My children! My son, my daughter were erased like vermin! That was my punishment for daring what he now commits with impunity."
The hall shook with the force of his words. Dust sifted from the ceiling. Torches flared blacker.
"Maria di Angelo," he hissed, pacing, shadows writhing at his heels. "Innocent Maria. She gave me laughter, warmth, and humanity. She gave me Nico. Bianca. And Zeus murdered them. Murdered them! And yet his spawn lives, wrapped in the camp's wards, shielded, cradled in silence while Olympus looks away. My grief buys her life."
He turned on Persephone then, his fury whipping the chamber raw. "Zeus has always been favored! Even in the womb, Rhea hid him while Kronos devoured the rest of us. She coddled him. He struts across Olympus, king of thunder, breaker of oaths, while I the only one who keeps them am shackled here among dirt and ghosts!"
Persephone's voice cut sharp as a blade. "And yet you rage for Maria as though you did not betray me with her."
The storm stilled. Hades' breath seethed, eyes narrowing.
"Do not twist this, wife," he said, his tone a low growl. "Maria was no conquest. She was mortal and fragile. A candle against our eternity. And Zeus snuffed her out. My quarrel is not with you. It is with him."
Her gaze did not soften. "Yet it was my place you stepped beyond."
"My place?" Hades' laugh was a jagged crack in the dark. "My place is the Underworld! To guard its gates, to keep its oaths. I have done so. Always. And yet Zeus! Zeus scatters bastards across the world, and Olympus calls it mischief. I sought joy once.. Once! And he burned it away."
The Furies flattened themselves further, bones grinding against bronze.
Persephone's tone was iron. "Then your rage has no end. Olympus will never name it injustice. They will call it a necessity."
"Necessity?" The word dripped venom. Hades' voice dropped to a grave's chill. "There was no necessity in Maria's death. No necessity in the cries of my children as they burned. There is only Zeus' thunder drowning every other voice." His hand tightened, cracking stone to dust. "But thunder fades. Always. And when it does the dead will remember. I will remember. I, Lord of the Dead, will not forget."
The torches screamed higher, black flames licking the walls. Shadows twisted into forms of weeping men, screaming women, children reaching for parents they'd never see again.
The Furies dared not breathe.
Persephone sat unmoved, her eyes unreadable. And Hades, wrath still shaking the bones of his palace, stood cloaked in ghosts, his vengeance a curse waiting for the day his brother failed.
Naruto snapped awake at the sound of giggling. His instincts screamed danger, but he was half a second too slow.
SPLAT.
A bucket of cold, slimy goop cascaded over his head.
"GAH!" He shot upright, choking, wiping at his face. The sludge dripped from his hair in globs, reeking of swamp water… and was that maple syrup?
At the foot of the cabin, two identical boys collapsed against each other, howling with laughter.
"Oh man, did you see his face?!" one gasped.
"Priceless!" the other wheezed. "Welcome to Cabin Eleven, newbie!"
Naruto froze mid-drip, goo sliding down his nose. His expression went completely blank. Then his lips curled into a slow, dangerous grin.
"Ohhh. You think you're funny."
The Stoll brothers puffed their chests, still smirking. "We don't think. We know."
Naruto flicked a glob of slime off his cheek, his grin sharpening into something feral. Mischief sparked in his eyes like lit fuses.
"Big mistake."
The laughter faltered. Just a little.
He jabbed a thumb at his chest. "You just declared war on the Prank Lord of Konoha. Believe it."
Gasps and snickers rippled from the bunks. Hermes kids leaned in, whispering like they'd just been promised bloodshed.
"Prank war, huh?" someone muttered. "Kid's got guts."
"Or no brain," another snorted.
Naruto only grinned wider. They had no idea what storm they'd invited.
The cabin door banged open, and Chiron's head poked in, voice dry as sandpaper. "Up, everyone. Breakfast, then training. Let's move."
Naruto perked instantly. "Food?!"
"Yes, food," Chiron sighed. His eyes flicked over Naruto's slime-soaked form. "And for you… a bath."
The cabin erupted in laughter as Chiron clip-clopped away.
By the time Naruto scrubbed himself clean (mostly, his hair still carried a suspicious syrupy sweetness), the camp was alive with motion. Kids streamed between cabins, sparring rings, and strawberry fields, weapons clanging, satyrs whistling as they trotted past.
Naruto jogged to keep up, wide-eyed. "Whoa! This place is huge. And are those.." He skidded to a halt as a white stallion thundered overhead on wings as wide as sails, scattering feathers like snow. "flying horses?!"
"Pegasi," Chiron confirmed, like it was the most normal thing in the world.
Naruto gawked. "You're telling me people ride those? Please tell me people ride those."
Chiron's face said yes, and also don't even think about it.
The open-air pavilion stretched wide, sunlight spilling across long wooden tables crowded with shouting, laughing demigods. At the center, a bronze brazier burned with roaring fire, flames licking the sky.
Chiron gestured him forward. "Tradition first. An offering to the gods."
Naruto scratched his cheek, nervous. "Uh… problem. I don't really know your gods yet or most of them hate me."
"It doesn't matter," Chiron said firmly. "Take food, give it up. The flames will carry it."
Naruto hesitated, then grabbed a steaming strip of bacon. He eyed the fire, then tossed it in.
"Alright then. Don't waste it! To Artemis!"
The flames leapt high, sparks bursting like fireworks. For an instant, it felt like the fire heard him.
Chiron turned his head sharply, eyes narrowing.
Naruto blinked at him, grease still on his fingers. "...What?"
Naruto turned at the sound of shouting and spotted Thalia and Annabeth waving him over. He broke into a grin, but then froze.
Because sitting in Annabeth's lap, tiny as a housecat, was Kurama.
Nine little tails swished lazily as Annabeth scratched behind his ears like he'd been a house pet all his life.
Naruto exploded. "Pfft! HAHAHAHAHA!" He doubled over, tears streaming down his face. "Kurama you.. you look ridiculous! You're like a stuffed animal!"
Kurama's ears flattened. In a blur of orange fur, he launched and latched onto Naruto's hand with needle-sharp teeth.
"OW OW OW OW! LET GO, YOU DEMON RAT!" Naruto flailed his arm like he was trying to shake off a bear trap, campers roaring with laughter as Kurama dangled there, snarling.
Annabeth calmly plucked the fox free and nestled him back into her lap, stroking him like she'd been doing it for years. "He's cuter like this," she said matter-of-factly.
"Cuter?!" Naruto clutched his hand like it had been mangled. "He's a menace!"
Kurama flicked his tails smugly, curling up like a king reclaiming his throne.
Thalia choked on a laugh as Naruto finally slumped into a seat beside her, dripping indignity.
"What happened to you?"
Naruto glared through sticky green hair that still reeked faintly of syrup. "The Stoll brothers happened," he muttered darkly. "And they're gonna pay."
Annabeth wrinkled her nose. "You smell like a swamp."
"Better than smelling like burnt toast," Naruto shot back instantly. His eyes flicked at Thalia, and her smirk widened like he'd just passed a test.
Across the table, Luke didn't even pause shoveling food into his mouth. He shot Naruto a flat, knowing look. "Don't start what you can't finish. From what I've heard so far Travis and Connor have been running pranks here since they could walk. They'll eat you alive."
Naruto tore into a strip of bacon with a feral grin. "Then they've never met real competition."
The challenge hung in the air, sharp as steel. A few Hermes kids down the table perked up, already whispering bets.
At the head of the pavilion, Chiron cleared his throat. "Now that our new arrivals are settled…" His eyes flicked toward Naruto. "…I would like to remind everyone that training begins immediately after breakfast. And Naruto please, for the sake of the naiads wash your hair properly before sparring. Half the forest spirits are complaining."
The pavilion erupted in laughter. Naruto slumped, cheeks red, but only for a heartbeat.
Because behind the sulk was that grin again. The one that meant war.
After breakfast, Chiron led them up to the shaded deck. A man sprawled in a chair like gravity had finally won, Hawaiian shirt loud enough to kill, a Diet Coke sweating at his elbow. He didn't even look up.
"Lord Dionysus," Chiron said with practiced calm. "Allow me to introduce our new arrivals."
The god sighed. It sounded like the world's longest exhale of boredom. At last, his bloodshot eyes flicked over them.
"This is Naruto."
"Yes, yes. Welcome, Nachuro. Another demigod brat. Just what I needed."
Naruto stiffened. "It's Naruto. Na-ru-to."
"Right, right. Naturo."
"That's not what I said!"
"Oh, forgive me. Nachuro again, then?"
Annabeth bit her lip, shoulders shaking. Thalia snorted outright. Luke smirked.
Naruto jabbed a finger at him. "You're doing that on purpose!"
"Of course I am," Mr. D said blandly, popping his soda open. "You're loud, reckless, and mortal. That's three strikes already. Do us all a favor and explode quickly so I can get back to my game."
Naruto gawked. "What kind of camp director are you?!"
"The unwilling kind," Mr. D deadpanned.
His gaze slid lazily toward Annabeth and stopped. The small fox in her arms bared its teeth, red eyes burning, nine tails swishing like knives. The air prickled with malice.
For the first time, Dionysus actually seemed to focus. His lip curled in something between nostalgia and disdain.
"Well, well. A Kyūbi." He leaned back, eyes hooded. "Haven't seen one since I wandered east, long before Olympus shackled me here with you little ingrates. A divine beast, not some common mutt." He took a slow drink. "Fits right in at this miserable camp."
Kurama bared his teeth in something suspiciously close to a grin. "Finally, someone recognizes my greatness."
Annabeth just kept scratching him behind the ears.
Chiron's patience could've been bottled and sold. He pressed on. "This is Luke Castellan."
"Lucky Cast-Iron," Mr. D said without blinking. "Yes, you look like a toaster."
Luke's jaw clenched. "It's Castellan."
"Whatever you say, Lucky."
"And Annabeth Chase," Chiron went on.
"Annie-beth Chives," Mr. D sighed. "Try not to get eaten, though if you do, you'll pair nicely with salad."
Annabeth's nose wrinkled. "It's Chase."
"That's what I said. Chives."
"And lastly, Thalia Grace."
The god's gaze slid over her. "Ah. Tallulah Grapes. Another one of my father's bastard spawns. Do keep the thunder to a minimum, child. Lightning gives me migraines."
Thalia's fingers tightened on her spear. "Thalia."
"Yes, yes, Tallulah. Exactly what I said."
Naruto crossed his arms, slime-stained hair still faintly green. "At least he hates everyone equally.."
Luke muttered something rude under his breath.
Mr. D drained half his can, leaned back, and waved them off. "If you're done wasting my oxygen, begone. Some of us are very busy doing absolutely nothing."
Chiron cleared his throat. "And that," he said gravely, "is our camp director."
The rest of the morning blurred into chaos.
Chiron guided them down gravel paths that wove between cabins, sparring rings, and strawberry fields bursting red with fruit. The air buzzed like a hive with bronze clashing, arrows whistling, and campers shouting in triumph or groaning in defeat. Naiads giggled in the creek, dryads peeked from the trees, satyrs cheered from the sidelines. Camp Half-Blood wasn't just alive; it was a battlefield dressed up like a summer retreat. And Naruto loved every minute of it.
Their first stop was the sparring ring.
The clang of bronze filled the air as kids in battered armor went at each other with wild grins, blades sparking, shields shoving, bruises blooming across arms and faces like badges of honor. But one camper stood out in the chaos.
Clarisse La Rue.
She was tall, broad-shouldered, with muscles flexing under her sweat-slick shirt, she fought like she was proving something with every strike. Her brown hair was tied back, eyes gleaming like tempered steel. She rammed the butt of her spear into a poor Hermes kid's chest, sending him sprawling in the dirt, wheezing.
The Ares cabin whooped, stomping their boots in thunderous rhythm.
"Clarisse," Chiron said dryly, like he'd said the same words too many times. "Our resident Ares camper."
Clarisse yanked her spear free of the dirt, rolling her shoulders, gaze sweeping across the newcomers like wolves weighing lamb. "What?" she barked. "Never seen a real fighter before?"
Most kids looked away. Annabeth muttered "meatheads" under her breath. Thalia just smirked.
Naruto grinned like he'd been waiting for this moment all morning. "Nice hit! Bet you can't do that to me, though."
"Oh gods," Thalia groaned, dragging a hand down her face.
Annabeth pinched the bridge of her nose. "Do not encourage her."
But it was too late. Clarisse's eyes lit like bonfire sparks catching dry grass. She spun her spear in one hand with lazy grace, a predator stretching before the kill.
"Oh, I like you," she said, her grin all teeth. "Finally, someone with guts. Or maybe just no brains. Either way" she cracked her knuckles, "you're mine."
The Ares kids roared, weapons hammering against shields. The Hermes kids groaned, already whispering bets.
Naruto leaned forward, eyes sparking, grin feral. "Then what're we waiting for?"
Clarisse barked a laugh. "Careful, kelphead. I don't go easy on little boys who run their mouths."
"Lucky for you," Naruto shot back, thumbing his chest, "I don't know the meaning of easy."
The crowd howled, the air electric.
Chiron's tail swished once, sharp against the dirt. "Enough. If two demigods agree to spar, then spar you may. Weapons dulled, no killing, no permanent maiming. Do I make myself clear?"
"Clear," Clarisse snapped without hesitation.
"Fine by me," Naruto said, still grinning.
Clarisse pointed her spear at him like it was already a grave marker. "Then step in the ring. Right here. Right now."
Naruto vaulted the ropes in a single bound, landing in the dirt with a flourish. "Hope you stretched, muscles. I hit harder than I look."
Clarisse twirled her spear, the tip gleaming bronze in the sun. "Good. I like breaking things that fight back."
The crowd pressed closer, buzzing like a storm about to break. Ares steel against a grinning wild card.
Chiron raised a hand between them. The whole camp held its breath.
"Begin!"
____
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