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Chapter 2 - I'm Sorry. You Suck.

The Adventurer Guild, an organization found in all isekai stories, was a typical trope in fantasy worlds. Having seen countless Isekai anime, Parita was sick of them. However, when it occurred to her, she couldn't help but appreciate this common job center. 

The building was noticeable. Compared to the two-story wooden homes, the adventurer guild's building stood out as a tall, three-story structure built with bricks and plaster. The town was more developed compared to an average medieval village or a beginner's town in RPGs. 

DING

[You have found the Adventurers Guild.]

[Your CHARM attribute has increased by 1.]

[One silver coin has been deposited into your temporary inventory.]

[Your temporary inventory has been unlocked.]

She completed the first tutorial quest. 

A new system screen manifested next to the message screen. The left screen displayed the message log, and the right showed the inventory, which was in the form of box grids. An icon of a rough coin occupied one of the squares. 

Testing the 'temporary' inventory system, she tried touching the screen. However, her hand phased through the screen. 

Meanwhile, the system gave her a new instruction.

[Initiating the tutorial quest #2.]

[Withdraw the silver coin from the temporary inventory.]

[Rewards: a mocap outfit and a disguise mask. Permanently increase your charm attribute by 1.]

The reward seemed similar to the previous one, except for the mocap outfit. 

Parita remained expressionless as a robot. Trying to grasp the silver coin in the inventory, she moved her fingers into a pinching gesture. At last, her fingertips detected a response from the coin. She pulled it out.

A crude silver coin emerged from the semi-transparent screen. The coin was slightly bigger than her thumb, and the edge was uneven. One face of the coin displayed a stamped horse crest, while the opposite face was plain.

DING

[You have withdrawn the silver coin.]

[Your CHARM attribute has increased by 1.]

[A mocap outfit and a disguise mask have been deposited into your temporary inventory.]

[Initiating the tutorial quest #3.]

[Change into the mocap outfit and put on the mask. Register as a new adventurer at the Adventurers Guild.]

[Rewards: a random skill book. Permanently increase your charm attribute by 1.]

[Note: If asked, your class is an idol.]

"…"

Although skeptical, Parita followed the instructions. She silently entered a secluded alley near the Adventurers Guild's building and changed her clothes. When Parita retrieved the mask, she inspected it. 

It was soft and elastic. However, the texture resembled peeled human skin. 

It was a human-skin mask!

Parita was frozen for several minutes, her hands trembling in fear. Even though she was frightened and intimidated, her face was, as always, expressionless. She eventually put the mask on. 

The mask's skin was loose and saggy. The nose part was longer and her real nose, but the mouth part was sewn. Only the area around her eyes fit perfectly. 

Once she had the mask on, she glanced at her worn T-shirt and casual cotton pants. 

'I can't carry these around.'

Following her streamer instincts, she brought them to the floating screen. The clothes vanished into the inventory. In the empty boxes, two icons appeared, each symbolizing her T-shirt and cotton pants. 

'I see.'

Parita was excited about her new abilities, but her dull expression remained unchanged. With her feet still bare, she walked out of the alley and headed toward the adventurers guild.

Undaunted, Parita entered the adventurer guild. Upon pushing open the doors and entering, she was met with a large room that served as both a tavern and a service center. Wild men of all races occupied the tavern tables and chatted with their comrades. Adventurous women, some in leather armor and others in impractical bikinis, joined their groups and followed their leaders' instructions. All-female parties also minded their businesses at their tables. 

Adventurers glanced at Parita when she entered the hall. Some people looked displeased when they saw her out-of-place outfit and bare feet. Also, her slender frame didn't fit with the image of someone who fought monsters for a living. 

Regardless of her strange outfit, nobody bothered her. Some of the men smacked their lips before ignoring the situation and continuing with their own affairs. They weren't supposed to kick her out of the bar, and they didn't like interfering with people they didn't know. Moreover, some of the people was wary of her calm demeanor and the intimidating skin mask. 

Just as everybody in the hall predicted, a security guard of the adventurer guild approached Parita. The man, standing at two meters, possessed a muscular build. He was dressed in complete leather armor, with a tiger fur draped over him. 

The barbarian glared at Parita, issuing a warning in a harsh tone. 

"This is not a place for a kid. Get out."

All eyes focused on Parita and the barbarian security guard. Some sipped their ale, enjoying the show. Female adventurers also smirked, anticipating a reaction from Parita. 

In the crowd, only one person, an acolyte in a priestess robe, who was sitting alone in a corner and eating raw garlic, looked at Parita with worry. 

Parita, however, didn't even look at the barbarian. She avoided him and proceeded to an unoccupied counter, facing a receptionist. 

The barbarian was offended. He grabbed Parita's left shoulder. 

Parita glanced at the hand. While her expression never changed, her mind was in chaos.

'A sexual assault? A kidnapper? A thug? Am I being robbed? Is he planning to take me somewhere?! Should I scream and ask for help?!'

She mustered her strength to scream. Unfortunately, her vocal cords failed to produce a voice. She exhaled deeply instead. 

Her action irritated the barbarian. 

"Are you sighing?! What? You're looking down on me?!"

Finally, Parita muttered in a quiet voice. "Get your hand off me."

"Huh? What did you say?!"

Parita mustered her courage and spoke louder. However, she ended up shouting instead. 

"GET YOUR HAND OFF ME!"

Her mocap outfit and mask shone in pink light and blinded everybody in the hall. While everybody was dazed, the clothes transformed her into a magical girl. When the light receded, a pink-haired girl in an idol outfit replaced the gloomy masked girl. 

Parita had no time to react to her sudden transformation. Her clothes forced her limbs and body to move by themselves. She pivoted, grabbed the barbarian around his wide waist, and picked him up. Her back then curved backward, dropping the giant's head to the floor.

With everything done, the audience regained their sight. They turned to the commotion and spat out their drinks in astonishment. 

The thin girl executed a suplex on the barbarian!

Everybody stared at the commotion in silence. 

The idol outfit stopped controlling Parita. She released the security guard and got up. However, she didn't notice that her neutral expression influenced her new face. Parita glanced at the crowd. 

To others, Parita appeared to be a pink-haired elf. She appeared friendly, cheerful, and approachable because of her gentle smile. However, Parita's real expression behind the mask remained as dull as ever. 

Parita nervously looked at the barbarian, whose head pierced through the wooden floor. She turned to the receptionist. Her mind thought of excuses. 

'What should I do? What do I do?! My body moved by itself! I didn't mean it!'

Despite the panic, her mouth and her throat moved automatically. She spoke to the receptionist.

"Excuse me."

Y-Yes? The receptionist saw most of it, but not the part where the mocap suit became a shiny idol costume. Also, she didn't realize Parita had gained a pair of shoes.

The costume continued manipulating Parita's mouth and throat. 

"I want to be an adventurer. How do I register?"

"O-Of course. P-Please fill in the form."

Parita's hand moved by itself and accepted the parchment and a feather pen. Her fingers and right hand manipulated the pen to draw weird symbols on the application form. 

Meanwhile, the puppet was helpless. Parita's mind was already in space, watching colorful fireworks. She didn't understand how someone had manipulated her body and voice. 

After completing the application form, the receptionist retrieved it and read the details. She smiled and asked to make sure. 

"What is your class again?"

"Idol." Parita automatically replied.

"Never heard of it before. Is this a unique class?"

This time, Parita managed to speak by herself. She asked. "Explain the term 'unique class', please?"

"Oh, it's a special term for classes that don't fall into any category. Do you know that everybody was born with an assigned class from birth, right?"

"…Huh?" Parita almost questioned the receptionist, but her throat and mouth got manipulated again. The auto voice replied. "Yes. We received the goddess's blessing at birth."

"Yes. Most are destined to be farmers, blacksmiths, cooks, or other regular jobs. Only one in a hundred was born with a combat class or a support class, such as a warrior, a priest, or a mage."

Parita inwardly nodded. Those classes were also common in games. 

The receptionist continued explaining. "Occasionally, individuals who are blessed with a new class appear. Some classes are a hybrid between two combat classes or mixed common classes. We usually identify them as a special class. However, when an unverified class appears, we call it a unique class."

The receptionist awkwardly smiled and stamped the document, marking Parita's class as unique. She continued. 

"Idol is a term that I haven't heard before. I'll submit this to my guildmaster for verification first, but I can tell that it's a combat type, right?"

Parita's transformed face remained smiling, but she inwardly rebuked. 

'Idol is an idol! Do you think it's a gorilla?!'

Minutes later, the receptionist returned. She happily informed Parita. 

"Congratulations. Your class has been registered as a combat class. You start at F Rank, and you can begin working by accepting jobs from the F Rank board over there by the east wall."

"…"

"Also, please help us pull our security guard off the floor. We will cut his salary as a punishment. Don't worry about it."

"…"

Parita, though confused, silently accepted a bronze token from the receptionist. Her body moved automatically as usual, and she grabbed the upside-down barbarian by his leg. She yanked the man off the floor with one hand. 

The crowd clapped their hands and raised their ale cups, whistling and cheering for Parita. They also jeered at the security guard. 

"Hey, Sars! Why did you try to chase that elf home? She just wanted to join the guild!"

Another man added. "Yeah. She's stronger than you, alright. She'll fit in here!"

A mage in skimpy clothes also jeered at Sars. "Are you sure you're a highland barbarian? If your elder knows that you lost to an elf in physical strength, they'll beat you up!"

The crowd burst into laughter. 

Meanwhile, Sars looked at everybody with wide eyes and turned his head toward Parita. She dropped him on the floor and was able to move freely again. 

"I'm sorry." Parita bowed deeply, but her auto-voice mocked him. "You suck. Do you even lift?"

"…"

The spectators couldn't stop laughing. 

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