Mei... What?
When I was confused by the words I couldn't catch, Lucie-chan wrapped her arms around Satsuki-san, who was sitting beside her sympathetically.
With a full smile, she gives a kiss on that cheek. Eh!?
W-What!?
Satsuki-san is accepting the kiss on her cheek without rejecting it. A small sigh.
"Honestly... In Japan, you don't just kiss anyone, Lucie." "This is Lucie's house. It's special jurisdiction."
This time, Lucie-chan faces her own cheek towards Satsuki-san. "Look, Lucie is waiting."
"Okay, okay."
Satsuki-san pressed her cheek against Lucie-chan's cheek and made a light kissing sound. She repeated it twice, once on each side!
Hawawawawawawa... "Fufufu"
"Are you satisfied now, princess?"
Lucie-chan held her cheek with both hands and squinted her eyes happily.
"Yes. I'm glad I came to Japan." After that, she smiled at me as well. "I've also made friends."
"Uh, yeah..."
I can't process the exchange happening in front of me, it's like something from a Western movie.
Huh? What on earth is their relationship...?
My surprised voice echoes through the residential area. "Is Lucie-chan Mai's fiancée!?"
In the evening, I was walking home, wearing the finally dried clothes, with Satsuki-san, as her part-time job time was approaching.
I ended up hearing the shocking fact.
It's much stranger that there are so many people as beautiful as her in the world…
"Ah, so that means Satsuki-san's old acquaintance, right?" "That's right."
"Could it be that Satsuki-san was the one who said 'Kisses are usually on the cheek' before?"
"You don't need to remember unnecessary things." Satsuki-san casually throws that out.
Did this person just say that the memory of my first kiss with her is 'unnecessary'?
"I suppose she'll be working in Japan for a while. Even so, I'm worried, so I sometimes go check on her."
"You're kind."
"You must have talked to her a few times. If that's the case, you understand, right?"
In my head, the images of Lucie-chan, who had collapsed, Lucie-chan, who had been quietly waiting for me on the horse, and Lucie-chan spilling the milk, all appeared one after another.
"Well… It's natural to worry, right?"
"That's how it is. Don't misunderstand it as kindness." It was a tone that didn't allow any argument.
Still, I think Satsuki-san is kind… Well, there's no need to forcefully impose words the person doesn't want to hear.
"That's because, for Mai and me, she's like a younger sister."
"Ah."
Somehow, it feels right.
Satsuki-san's attitude was more like being close to family than something you would do with friends or lovers.
…A younger sister, huh?
"Does Satsuki-san understand about Lucie-chan?" "What does that mean?"
"Ah, no, well... it's a kind of story about whether I can understand it or not."
"Well, probably… mostly? That girl looks simple at first glance." That might be true.
Joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness. All emotions come across directly, even though she doesn't have a rich expression. That might be the expressiveness of a famous model.
Satsuki-san easily touches upon my true feelings, which she had been holding without saying directly.
"Don't you understand about your younger sister?" "Eh… well, I mean…"
I look away.
"But honestly, I don't really understand anyone's feelings. I just thought… at the very least, I should understand my sister. But in the end,
I failed at that too."
Before I knew it, everything had already ended while I was caught up in all the chaos.
It'll probably always be this way.
I move too slowly, and my sister always ends up leaving me behind. It's completely reversed from when we were kids.
"I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing, though."
"I wonder if that's really the case... For example, Mai has never once in her entire life understood my feelings, but I don't particularly mind."
"Mai is forgiven for that, isn't she!?"
"That's true. One way or another, she tries to come closer. The fact that she makes an effort to understand properly gets across."
Satsuki-san chuckled softly.
"In reality, whether or not it actually helped is just a result. Having someone around who reaches out to help is a very fortunate situation for the person involved."
"Um… are you encouraging me?"
When I looked up at her, Satsuki-san slightly narrowed her eyes.
"For example, something like this. Just now, I said something cliché and ordinary, like what you'd find in any self-help book, but…"
"The way you said that…!"
"But if your feelings even lightened just a little, then that means it had some meaning, right? Even if nothing was actually done."
I wonder… is that really true…? I know that what Satsuki-san says is right in almost every situation, but…
"Is it selfish… to wish for more than this?"
"That's right. The help someone can give at a given time depends on timing and their own mood. Anything more than that is just forcing it. It won't end well."
Satsuki-san declared firmly. She sounded like she was saying something that could go viral on X (formerly Twitter).
Without thinking, I ended up complaining to Satsuki-san. I quietly reflected on it in my heart and lowered my head slightly.
"…Thank you. I'll remember that."
"That's why even I don't interfere in Mai and Lucie's fiancé issue. I just check on Lucie from time to time, and that's it, right?"
"Well… yeah, that's true…"
"…Huh? But Satsuki-san, when Mai asked you on the rooftop, 'Did you meet Lucie-chan?' I think you answered 'no'…"
Maybe… this is something I shouldn't have said too. Satsuki-san didn't change her expression at all. "That's right. That was a lie."
How bold! "W-Why?"
Satsuki-san elegantly brushed her hair aside as she spoke.
"If I feel like something is going to turn into a hassle, I just lie without any particular reason. That's the kind of person I am."
"Aren't you saying something terrible!?" "Isn't that just human nature?"
"That might be true, but still!"
However, recent research has shown that animals also tell lies. Not just through camouflage or mimicry. Monkeys and crows are well-known examples. Social animals have the ability to lie. In other words, Satsuki- san's statement should be "Isn't that social behavior?" instead of "Isn't that human nature?"
Well, not that it really matters!
"But if you lie, you have to keep remembering the lie forever… In the end, I feel like it's just not worth it…"
I'm probably the last person who should be saying this, considering how I keep covering up my past.
"It's fine. I'm smart, after all."
"Oh… If that's the case, then I guess it's fine…? Maybe…?"
I don't know. But I can't change the way Satsuki-san lives. Because it's not like I'm her life partner or anything.
"Don't worry. I'll keep the thing with Terusawa a secret for you." "Nguh!"
I almost bit my tongue.
I unintentionally held my neck while looking at Satsuki-san.
"It's not like that, really… that was something Youko-chan did unilaterally…"
"That's why I said I would keep it a secret for you."
"Something feels unsettling! It's like after that, it adds 'So listen to what I say'!"
Satsuki-san furrowed her brow.
"It's paranoia. It's hallucinations caused by your guilty feelings." "Well, that's exactly it!"
If I give in to this guilt, I'll end up calling Mai and Ajisai-san and confessing, "I was bitten on the neck while taking a shower with my friend…"
No one can be happy; it's the bad end route caused by my weakness. Bad end 73: [The end of the fickle woman]... So many bad ends!
Well, as long as Satsuki-san stays quiet, Lucie-chan won't know about what happened in the bath, and Youko-chan probably won't tell anyone... Probably.
I ended up in an unexpected bad situation, but... the heavy feeling I had when going out is gone. Maybe I was too nervous to even feel down.
I rubbed my neck.
"Sigh… Even if it was just a joke, wasn't that going too far…? Was Youko-chan feeling stressed…?"
She seemed uncomfortable with Lucie-chan.
If you keep getting dragged around for work, you'd want to let loose sometimes too, I guess.
The place where I got bitten… still kind of stings… It hurt quite a bit… I don't think I'll be able to forget it anytime soon.
"Well, at the very least, be careful with Terusawa." "Haha… Yeah, you're right."
At the very least, I should avoid taking a shower together again. That kind of playful giggling and messing around might be normal for high school girls, but for me, it's just too much…
We arrived at the fork in the road. This is where I part ways with Satsuki- san. However, just as she was leaving, Satsuki-san dropped a bombshell.
"That person is after you." That means…
The moment I understood what she meant, my cheeks suddenly grew hot.
"Huh!?"
* * *
"I'm off!"
Early in the morning, my little sister's voice echoes.
Leaving the house at the same time as before, my little sister seems to
have completely gotten back to normal. My family, too, goes about their days as if no one even remembers that my sister once stopped going to school.
It's the same for me, too.
I decided to lock the class reunion invitation away in my desk drawer... Other than that, life goes on as usual. Plans with everyone in Quintet didn't line up easily, though. But for the most part, I was satisfied with my current days.
Even while hoping for a big change, I feel relieved by my unchanging daily life. Humans really are greedy creatures.
"I'm home!"
Before dinner, my little sister comes home.
As I lay on the living room sofa, lazily lounging around, she looks down at me with eyes that seem to say, "Seriously, this person..."
"Big sis, what about your homework?"
"Today, I only have ones that I can finish quickly." "Then you should just do it first."
"Yeah, that's true. That's one way to look at it."
"Yeah, yeah. Mom, I'm so tired from club activities! I'm hungry! What's for dinner?"
The same, unchanged daily life as before my sister stopped going to school.
I really wanted to help my little sister as her big sister… but in the end, she recovered on her own—without relying on anyone. (Well, maybe with some support from everyone in Quintet…)
That's admirable. Even if she stumbles sometimes, she's still different from me.
But…
I was only focused on the things I could see. Because she acted like nothing was wrong, I convinced myself that it was already over.
At this point, the gears had long been broken.
The everyday life I had been seeing was nothing more than a cardboard building made five minutes ago. There might have been a great sacrifice behind it.
I had not known all along.
And then, on that day, on the way back from school, I was ambushed for the second time.
* * *
S-She's here...
The person is, once again, Seira-san.
However, this time, she didn't appear near my house but in front of the station close to school.
While hiding behind a utility pole, I peek at the situation.
The middle school student standing in front of the station stands out because of her glamorous appearance. It looks like the stylish and glamorous streets of Harajuku are in the background.
Frightened by the pressure of 999 messages, I ended up blocking the contact without thinking… but did it backfire on me...?
I can't believe she came all the way here…
No… maybe she isn't here for me. Maybe she's waiting for Kaho-chan… or perhaps our cosplay friend, Moon-san...
No, that's not it. Somehow, her look is sharp... That's the face of a hunter aiming for its prey.
That means, the monster to be hunted is, after all, me... Seira-san did say she would come again... Well then, how should I get through this...
A sudden stealth mission has begun.
If this were a game, I'd climb the walls like parkour and escape across the rooftops, but unfortunately, this is reality. I can't even perform a ninja assassination. Games don't help in life.
So, I could either go into a café to kill time or, while the Ashigaya students are still around, blend into the crowd and head toward the opposite ticket gate.
If i want to be sure, there's also the option of taking one step back… but…
If I'm stalked every day starting today, I'll end up walking a lot every day, and I'll get really healthy… I might even lose weight…
While I was thinking such foolish things, a sudden revelation came to me.
Wait. Why is Seira-chan standing so proudly in front of the station like that?
After all, the other day when she was waiting in front of the Amaori family's house, she captured me, who was walking carefreely without a thought, so magnificently. Then this time too, she could have just hidden in front of the ticket gate, right?
My FPS brain is whispering to me. In other words...
Suddenly leaving the spot, I looked around. Seira-chan over there is the decoy, and... The one who is supposed to capture me should be somewhere...
...Where is it? Where?
If there's no one here, it would mean that I'm just having a solo "chuunibyou" episode. It seems like my instincts were sharp. In the corner of my vision, I briefly saw a figure that looked like a middle school student, wearing a coat.
This is it!
I'm glad I played FPS. Games really do help in life...! I continue to be saved by games.
Sneakily breaking out of the encirclement, I relentlessly apologize in my mind.
I'm sorry, Seira-san. When things settle down, I'll bring a box of sweets to the cleaning shop... Please, let me protect my heart for now...
I guess this is what it feels like to be a criminal... After walking for a short while.
My wrist was grabbed by someone. "Huh?"
Immediately after, a clinking, rigid sound. It was the sound of handcuffs being attached to my wrist.
"...Huh!?"
I lift my face. Right before me was... "I caught you."
It was Minato-san.
"Wh-Why!? Then, who was that figure earlier!?" "I got help from a friend."
"No way..."
In my world, the only people who played the role of Haruna's friends were Seira-san and Minato-san. But to think that other friends would appear...!
This isn't the world of a game; it's reality. There are 8 billion people in the world. What I learned in games isn't useful here after all...!
I try to pull away with all my strength, but my wrist is suddenly pulled. I realize. One side of the handcuffs is connected to Minato-san's wrist.
Oh no!.
"The thing when they take the suspect away...!"
"Well, the handcuffs themselves are toys, but I don't think you can break them that easily."
"Why go this far!?"
"I also have my own circumstances." "It's a conflict of circumstances..."
"So, I arrested you. If you want me to remove them, please listen to what I say."
Minato-san lightly lifts his hand. The sound of the jangling handcuffs completely controls my free will.
Minato-san opens his smartphone and murmurs, "16:52, suspect secured..."
"Ugh, the right to remain silent and the right to call a lawyer..." "You don't have those rights."
"I can't believe this is a rule of law country...!" A hand was placed lightly on my shoulder. "I'm your court-appointed lawyer, you know!" "!?"
I turn around, filled with hope.
"So, please behave, Onee-san senpai." It was Seira-san.
"Aren't you a person on the police's side?!"
To think that a detective and a lawyer are in cahoots, it's all over now... "Well, for now, shall we move to a different place?"
"Yeah, to some random cafe or something."
And so, I am sandwiched between two middle schoolers, being taken away. If any of my classmates saw me, it would instantly become a rumor-worthy scene.
What kind of judgment will be passed on me...? I really hope I can return to the outside world as soon as possible... from the bottom of my heart.
...But.
The story that was confessed to me by the two at the cafe was completely different from what I had imagined.
"Well then."
Coincidentally, the situation was very similar to when I set a trap for Seira-san with Kaho-chan the other day.
Last time, I had Seira-san sit at the far side of the table so she wouldn't escape, but this time it's the opposite.
Seira-san sat facing me, and Minato sat at my side, blocking the exit.
Since Minato and I are handcuffed together in the first place, there's absolutely no way to escape...
I see... When you do something bad to someone, it really does come back to you... Karma... It's painful...
Everyone finished ordering without much thought. Now, my public shaming is about to begin…
Cold sweat wouldn't stop. Is this how someone feels after being arrested? As though their future has been taken away.
"Um... I don't have much money..." I whimper in a faint voice.
They might ask for wages, compensation, or a settlement fee... But if I could pay with money, that would be better... Please, just don't give me prison time... not prison time, please...
The detective and the lawyer exchange glances and nod at each other. Then, it was the lawyer (Seira-san) who opened her mouth.
"Onee-san Senpai." "Yes..."
The hardest three-way meeting of my life begins... Already, the corners of my eyes are burning.
Will I again, in front of the two of them, shamefully expose my crying face...?
Seirai-san lowered her head. "I'm sorry."
...Huh?
"What exactly... Huh?"
I widened my eyes.
"Are you saying… 'From now on, I'm going to spread your personal information on social media. So, I'm apologizing in advance'…!?"
"No, that's not it!" Seira-san pleads.
"The situation has changed. So, Onee-san Senpai… I need your help…" As if tracing the outline of a switch that must not be touched, I ask.
"The situation…?"
It seems like… I won't be punished for running away from the two of them…?
Both of them have expressions that say, "This isn't the time for that."
"Then, were you really waiting in ambush because you wanted my help...?"
"Yeah."
Seira-san nods. I lightly lift one of my hands. Minato-san's arm comes along with it.
"These handcuffs…"
"This time, we couldn't afford to let you escape." "Then, if you had just said so!"
"If I had told you, would you have trusted me? I was just waiting right in front of you, and as expected, you ran away, didn't you?"
"Ugh... "
Seira-san is completely right. I lower my head in apology.
"I'm sorry… I'm a woman who deserves to be restrained in handcuffs…"
"That's right. But don't worry. You can atone for your crimes. If you act now, it's still not too late."
"Is that true…? Lawyer-san…?"
Minato-san whispers to Seira-san in a low voice.
"Seira, if you push too hard, she'll just end up crying again…" "Hmm… Is now not a good time…?"
"Yeah. Save your personal grudge for after this is over." "Got it."
Once this whole 'situation' is over, it seems like Seira-san will properly take out her personal grudge on me. This sucks. It would've been nice if we could've just gotten along… but that's not how it turned out.
Even as I hung my head, I asked the two of them.
"But… Haruna has already gone to school, right? Then, doesn't that mean all the problems are settled…?"
Besides that…
It's frustrating, but I have to say it out loud and admit it.
"Haruna doesn't care about me at all… She acts like she was never skipping school… Even if something happens, I don't think there's anything I can do to help…"
"That's not true."
Minato-san firmly declared. "Because…"
"Minato."
Without responding to Seira-san calling her name, Minato-san turned to me, who was sitting beside her, and spoke.
"Haruna got angry because I talked about Onee-san." "…Eh?"
That was something Haruna denied to me while laughing. She said that her situation had nothing to do with big sis at all.
"I'll explain from the beginning."
Minato-san calmly began to talk to me, who was still confused.
"Let me confirm something first. My big sister, Nashiji Komachi, and Onee-san were former classmates, right?"
Just hearing that name makes my stomach feel heavy. As if defeated by gravity, I nodded softly.
"Yeah."
"I see. I also heard it when I was talking with my big sister. She told me that Amaori-senpai didn't go to school much at that time."
Seira-san stared at me, as if observing my expression.
I couldn't think of an appropriate reaction, so I just smiled to lighten the atmosphere.
"It's the truth. Probably, everything." Seira-san was surprised.
"I see... Huh, even though you're friends with Oozuka Mai-san?" "Well, I guess."
I gave a vague answer.
"By chance, Mai ended up sitting next to me at the entrance ceremony... and I was the first to speak to her. That's all there is to it."
"Um... how much did you hear?"
Minato exchanged a glance with Seira for a moment.
"She was absent from school, and also, she was a student who didn't stand out in middle school. That's about it."
Is that also true? I was asked with their eyes, and I nodded. Seira-san furrowed her brow.
"Then, on the contrary, why is Haruna being stubborn...?"
Minato-san continued.
"I told Haruna the things I heard. But then, Haruna suddenly started getting angry."
At that, Seira-san agreed.
"Haruna sometimes gets angry jokingly, but I was surprised because I had never seen her get so seriously upset before. But since she seemed to like Onee-san senpai quite a bit, I wondered if it was a sensitive topic."
I can't imagine Haruna getting angry about someone talking bad about me, and what Minato-san said was just the truth anyway...
"Haruna got so angry that I became stubborn... Things got a bit tangled. The class atmosphere kept getting worse... and I made Seira feel awkward, I'm sorry."
"No, not at all. Well, I did think you should have made up quickly though."
"I also... when my big sister was called a liar, I got upset and lost my temper..."
The way she said that, I suddenly became curious. "Minato-san, um... are you close with your older sister?" "Eh? No... I think it's normal, but... why?"
"Ah, no, it's nothing. Sorry, can you continue?" "Yes."
Minato-san gave a small nod and then continued.
"While we were spending time in different groups, friends asked about the cause of the fight. When I honestly answered, then..."
At that point, Minato-san was at a loss for words.
Seira-san's eyes widened, and she exhaled forcefully.
"It was definitely Haruna's fault for suddenly snapping! I still think that way!"
Minato-san placed her hand on her cheek.
Ah... the story about Minato-san getting hit by my little sister. Minato-san kept her gaze lowered.
"After that, Haruna stopped coming to school..." "B-but..."
I ask the two of them, as if the incident is still ongoing.
"Since Haruna started going to school again, doesn't that mean you two made up?"
For a while, the two of them didn't say anything. "...Is that not it?"
An awkward silence passed. About the time it takes for the second hand on the clock to make a full rotation,
Seira-san opened her mouth. "...So, the situation has changed." The conversation came back.
In other words, this is the current situation.
"Haruna won't try to talk to anyone."
Minato-san murmured quietly. "Eh...?"
Beyond that, it was a story about Haruna that I didn't know.
"Eventually, no one touched Haruna anymore, and she became like a person who wasn't there in class. It seems like she's not going to club activities either…"
"Eh, wait."
But, every day, it was like that. "I'm off!"
Early in the morning, in order to make it in time for morning practice...
With a smile on her face, as if nothing had changed, she would leave the house. And even when she came back, it was after it got dark…
… So, that was all a lie…?
In my mind, an image of Haruna appears.
Even during break time, Haruna just sits alone at her desk. She insists that she's fine, yet she spends her long, long days with nothing to do. My little sister, being crushed by peer pressure and loneliness.
Just like I once was. "Why..."
The words slip out from deep in my throat, unintentionally. "How did it end up like this…?"
If someone were excluding Haruna, I could understand. But the one excluding everyone… is Haruna.
Seira shook her head slightly.
"That's what I don't get. Even if I ask, she won't answer. She ignores all messages… Honestly, at this point, it would've been better if she just stopped coming to school!"
"I think it would be best if we could just apologize and move on… but Haruna doesn't seem interested in doing that…"
"To be blunt, Haruna's attitude in class is really bad right now. A lot of people are getting frustrated with her."
"… If this keeps up, the worst-case scenario…"
The rest of Minato-san's unfinished sentence was this:
"If this keeps up, the worst-case scenario… Haruna will be bullied."
That really would be… the worst possible future. Has she really angered everyone that much?
Bullying is always the bully's fault. The victim is never to blame—the ones in the wrong are the people around them.
But logic like that means nothing right now.
At the very least, Haruna is willingly throwing herself into hell. I can't just assume that Haruna will be fine somehow. The human heart isn't built to endure the malice of many.
I was crushed by the malice of just one person.
Why?
Why are you doing such a thing? Haruna, why?
In my head, an alarm bell rings out like the sound of a heartbeat.
If Haruna truly breaks down and ends up not going to school, I would regret it so deeply that nothing could ever make up for it.
Seira-san crosses her arms and leans deeply against the sofa.
"I'm really pissed off at Haruna, and I'm still totally pissed off even now! But it's not like I want to go that far, and I don't want those around her to do that either!"
"Onee-san."
Minato-san's eyes fix on me.
"It might be strange for us to ask this. But... if Haruna's trigger is you, then the only person who can change her feelings is you, Onee-san."
"..."
I wonder if that's true. In the end, Haruna did not take our... my hand. 'Because it has nothing to do with me,' she said, pushing me away.
...But.
Finally, it became clear.
As expected, the one Haruna was angry at was me. If it's like this, I can say it. After all, it's not like it has nothing to do with me, right?
I should be able to take one more step into Haruna's heart. If only I had the courage.
"Yeah."
I nodded.
I lift my face and look at the two of them.
"Got it. Thank you, both of you, for doing so much for Haruna." "No… I'm sorry for even using such a forceful method."
Minato-san removed my handcuffs with a small key.
"No, thank you for telling me."
I rub my wrist and nod deeply once more. "I'll try talking to Haruna again."
"Are you okay? Haruna is extremely stubborn, though."
"I might not be okay, but still, I have to do it." I give Seira-san a wry smile.
No matter how much you try to push me away, I won't let that happen.
Because…
"Haruna is my little sister… and I'm her big sister, after all."
I know I've shown my pathetic side so many times, but still… A middle schooler might see a high schooler as an adult, even just a little. I put on a brave front and said that with all my might.
My big sister has been staying at home all the time lately.
A so-called school refusal. This is what they call a "hikikomori." I had heard about it on social media and the news, but when I learned that there are actually hundreds of thousands of such people in Japan, I was shocked.
"Morning." "... "
Even when we see each other in the washroom in the morning, my big sister doesn't return my greeting. Her daily routine is completely messed up, so it looks like she's going to sleep now.
Her hair is messy. Her shirt is baggy. Her face, hidden behind overgrown bangs, looks lifeless, and I even doubt if she's taking care of her skin properly.
Watching my big sister's ghost-like figure walk away, I think to myself. If I ever end up like that, it's over for me.
"…Lame"
Even so, I was still worried about her. At least at first. I even tried talking to her carefully, like handling something delicate. But she ignored me almost completely.
I even borrowed a book about hikikomori from the elementary school library and tried reading it.
When my friends saw me, I casually brushed it off, saying, "I'm just interested in social issues." That memory is still fresh.
But it was all meaningless.
My big sister seemed as if her personality had been completely replaced by someone else. Even the few good things I acknowledged about her were completely gone.
That's no longer the big sister I knew.
By now, Haruna completely looks down on her older sister. Of course. She lowered herself all on her own.
Lame. Pathetic. Uncool. Spineless. Sloppy. Frustrating.
I don't go out of my way to be mean to her, but that's only because I really hate bullying the weak. I had already completely given up on her.
"Guess I'll go to school."
I grab my school backpack from my room, put it on, and leave the house. Lately, the most annoying thing at school was when people talked about my big sister. Having a big sister like that isn't something I can brag about to anyone.
Every time, Haruna just brushed it off vaguely. Each time, the irritation in my chest grew bigger.
"Speaking of which, the movie that was on the other day—" A casual chat time in the classroom.
While forcing a laugh, I wonder why I have to feel like this because of my big sister, and my frustration grows.
That day, when Haruna came home, she called out to her mother in the living room.
"Hey, Mom, I want to watch a movie on the computer..."
My big sister was sitting in front of the shared computer in the living room, even though she had one in her own room.
"She's using it right now, isn't she?" "Ehh? So annoying!"
She said that with a laugh, and my sister sluggishly stood up and left the living room.
Seeing that, Haruna snorted.
A scolding voice came from the kitchen, directed at Haruna. "Seriously, Haruna..."
Mom says that, but, big sister isn't even living seriously, so she shouldn't get in the way of people who are.
Haruna sat down in the seat where her older sister had been sitting and started watching a movie using the family subscription. That horror movie, which is popular among elementary school girls right now, was scarier than she expected. When it got late at night, Haruna couldn't fall asleep at all.
(No way, that was way too scary...! Did everyone really watch that...!?) She had never realized that she was bad with horror.
Which is exactly why she couldn't bring herself to stop halfway and ended up watching until the end.
(In the first place, it's not like I'm bad with horror...)
I had never been scared when watching horror movies with my friends before. But this movie was on a whole different level—two or three levels above that.
When I close my eyes, it feels like a ghost could jump out from the shadows at any moment, and it gives me chills. At this rate, I'll end up going to school tomorrow without sleeping. More importantly, being seen as scared by everyone would be the worst. Even in the world of elementary school girls, if you're looked down on, it's over.
I tried crawling into my futon with the lights on, but I still didn't feel like I could sleep.
(The worst...)
I got up and headed for the door. (I'll just go to the toilet once...)
However, the moment I opened the door, I regretted it. What spread out beyond my room was complete darkness. Everywhere was filled with shadows.
(Ugh...)
I unintentionally groaned in my mind. The toilet was right there, yet I couldn't find the courage to step forward. My imagination was changing the shape of the world.
Was the night always this dark? The only light source was the faint glow seeping through the gap in my sister's room.
It's hopeless. I have no choice but to sleep without going to the toilet. But that felt like a mission with an extremely high difficulty level.
I grit my teeth.
As I stood at the border between light and darkness, unable to move forward or backward...
My big sister's room's door opened.
Slowly, my big sister appeared. She noticed me and suddenly stopped. " "
But at that moment, Haruna turned her face away.
There's no way I'm asking this big sister for help. As a sixth grader, not being able to go to the toilet alone is way too lame. I'm not that much of a coward.
Seeing Haruna frozen in place, she tilted her head, but only for a moment. Then, she left her room and went to the toilet like it was nothing. She pulled it off effortlessly. Well, of course—she didn't watch the movie!
My big sister came back from the toilet. Her room's door shut with a bang.
(Tsk…)
For some reason, I felt like I had just missed a once-in-a-lifetime chance, and I couldn't help but clench my fist. Anger towards my big sister welled up—though even I knew that this time, it was completely unreasonable.
Just as I was about to imagine every insult I could think of in my mind, my big sister's room's door opened again.
"Huh…?"
This time, she walked straight toward Haruna.
"Haruna."
For the first time in a long while, my big sister called my name.
My big sister, looking nervous with her eyebrows lowered, cautiously asked me, as if checking my mood for some reason.
"Do you need to go to the toilet?"
... After a long, long silence, Haruna gave a small nod. "I'll go."
And then… how did it end up like this?
Now, Haruna was lying on a futon spread out on the floor of her older sister's room, sleeping side by side with her, eyes closed.
Just a while ago, her older sister had been saying things like, "That movie was really scary, right?" "I watched it too, but…" "Apparently, there were paranormal incidents even during the filming," as if trying to cover for herself. But when Haruna didn't respond, she eventually fell silent.
A dark room, without even a single nightlight on.
But just the simple fact that her older sister was right beside her made the fear she had felt earlier mysteriously disappear. There was definitely some frustration toward herself for having been helped by her of all people.
But there was something else—something difficult to put into words—lingering in her heart.
Because she had stayed up late, her eyelids soon became heavy. Her
body slowly sank into a lake of exhaustion. In the darkness, even if she strained her eyes, she couldn't see her older sister lying on the bed.
(Onee-chan...)
The way she murmured that name in her heart somehow already felt nostalgic. Even after that night, there were no special conversations between Haruna and her older sister.
Even so, when her older sister came to her, bowing her head and saying she wanted to stop being a shut-in, Haruna thought she might be willing to help. Maybe it was because of this night.
Finally.
Just one more step until I peel away my little sister's strong mask.
But... When I look back after everything is over, I wonder—why was I so desperate?
Well, of course. Since my little sister was in trouble, doing my best as her big sister was only natural. She's helped me so many times, and I owe her a lot.
If my sister hadn't been there, I wouldn't have been able to make my high school debut, and I wouldn't have met Quintet either.
In other words, I wouldn't have become lovers with Mai, wouldn't have dated Satsuki-san for two weeks and grown closer to her, wouldn't have accompanied Ajisai-san when she ran away from home, and wouldn't have participated in a cosplay event with Kaho-chan.
Most of the things that make up who I am now might as well not have existed.
In short, the person known as Amaori Renako was created because of Amaori Haruna's existence, and that is seriously no exaggeration.
When you lay it out like that, it seems completely natural that I would want to repay my sister.
Furthermore, if the reason my little sister stopped going to school and doesn't talk to anyone in class apparently has something to do with me, then that makes it even more important.
Even if it was something Haruna did on her own, now that I know about it, I can't just ignore it. It's practically a noble cause. If I don't take action, it would be questionable as a human being!
That's how it should be, but...
For some reason, those reasons didn't feel quite right to me.
"Since someone did something for me, I'll repay them." That should basically be the way I live my life.
All this time, I've been trying to repay the kindness I've received from those around me at least twice as much. That should have been my way of life, but...
But when it comes to Haruna, I couldn't help but feel that there must be a more fitting word to express my feelings.
The closest concept to it is probably… this thing called "love." I want Haruna's future to be happy, now and forever.
Because whether my little sister—who will continue to walk just a little behind me in life while living in the same house—is smiling or not has an incredibly big impact on my own happiness.
If that's the case, then this love—it's love, but still—what does 'love for myself' even mean? That's right, the answer is… self-love! Or something like that…
The true nature of what is called 'family love' or 'sibling love' turned out to be self-love for me, which kind of feels like a not-so-great conclusion, but…
But probably, that's just how it is. No matter how much our relationship changes, no matter how many times it does, as things keep changing, that alone won't change.
Sisters are beings who feel so far away that they don't even seem like family, yet too close to be considered strangers. I am sure that I reach out to my sister for my own sake.
That's why. "Haruna."
"Hm?"
That night, after Seira-san and Minato-san had their talk, I called out to stop Haruna, who had just gotten out of the bath.
My sister, who had gathered her long hair with a claw clip after finishing with the hairdryer, turned back.
Looking up at her. I wonder when it was that my sister surpassed my height.
"What? I have something to do now, so I'm not free."
Pretending not to notice the gentle rejection, I immediately decide to state my business.
Ahem. After clearing my throat, I spread my arms. Then, putting on a smile like the sun, I say.
"This Sunday, want to go on a date with me?" "…Huh?"
Just like Mai did. To open my little sister's heart, I need to take a step closer first. This time for sure, I absolutely can't afford to fail.
* * *
The holiday was sunny, and the sunlight was gentle. Today could be called the perfect day for a date. Come to think of it, on days I've gone out with my sister, I feel like the weather has always been on our side.
Does she even have the power of a sunny-weather girl…?
As I was waiting at the entrance, my sister comes down the stairs lightly. "You're so slooow~"
Thinking of complaining to my sister, who unusually took a long time to get ready, I turn around. And then, I was surprised.
"Sorry, sorry."
My sister, raising one hand with a completely unapologetic face, was dressed stylishly. Of course, my sister always has good fashion sense, but today, she looks kind of glamorous. Specifically, she's wearing proper makeup, a top that shows her shoulders, and on top of that, she let her hair down.
Usually, her ponytail, tied up like a sports club member, is her signature look, but that's exactly why letting her hair down completely changes her impression.
Her long hair, which I only ever see after she gets out of the bath, is swaying smoothly.
Somehow… she looks really girly. "Hm?"
"Ah, no… It's just… you're really dressed properly, I mean…"
"It's not like I'm putting in extra effort or anything. It just takes time, so I normally don't do it. If you had told me, I could've done this much."
My sister gives me a deadpan stare. Ah, she's still holding a grudge over me bringing Ajisai-san and Satsuki-san without notice…!
"Even when I went out for a meal with Mai-senpai, if you had told me earlier, I would have dressed appropriately."
"Ugh… Sorry."
"It's fine, whatever. But when I dress up, I have to worry about sauce splashing and stuff, and I can't focus on my food."
As my sister shrugs and picks out her shoes, I mention something just in case.
"Ah, we might be walking a bit today, so it might be better to wear comfortable shoes."
"Hmm."
Haruna chose her usual loafers.
Me? I only have one pair of sneakers, so I don't really have a choice. "Are you okay, big sis? You had blisters the other day."
"Ah, yeah. I've finally gotten used to them. Thanks for your help back then."
"I see."
My little sister responded bluntly and lightly put on her shoes. I open the door, and the nice weather greets us.
"Well then, let's go." "Okay~"
First, we head to the station. From there, we take the train, marking the start of our little outing.
"Ah, but before that—" "Hm?"
Just as we stepped outside, my little sister stopped. "I want you to promise me something."
"What for?"
"I'm going along with this date with you as a special favor." "U-uh."
I was the one who invited her, but when the word 'date' comes from my little sister's mouth, it feels really awkward. I think she sees it as a fun outing, though…
"Don't talk about school refusal. It's too troublesome." "Ah..."
"If you can't promise, I'll go home right now, okay?"
Just a few steps out of the entrance, my sister speaks. To think she immediately sees through my scheme and warns me—she's really sharp. Maybe I'm being too obvious... Suddenly inviting my own sister on a date is weird, after all.
"Got it. I promise."
"Good."
My sister nods exaggeratedly.
"Well then, please escort me properly, big sister."
She extends her hand to me. Somehow, when she says it like that, I get nervous...
As if holding a tool I'm not used to, I nervously grasp my little sister's hand.
"I'll do my best, as much as I can."
Apparently, that response wasn't to my sister's liking.
With a "good grief" kind of look, my sister shook her head slightly. Tch... I'll do my best!
My little sister and I walked all the way to the station, still holding hands. From an outsider's perspective, we must look like an unbelievably close pair of sisters.
Even though I know she's my little sister, she looks unusually good today, so I end up getting unnecessarily nervous...
If I had known, I would've prepared a conversation deck in advance. But against my little sister...? There are too many possibilities—so in the end, it's a battle relying on my own skills.
Inside the train, we stand side by side, holding onto the hand straps.
For some reason today, my little sister isn't touching her phone at all. Even while traveling, she just gazes at the scenery.
Occasionally, she glances at me. "Um..."
"Hm?"
My little sister tilts her head slightly. Unlike me, her always well-cared-for hair has a nice scent.
"...Why did you say 'okay'?" "About the date?"
"Yeah."
"Well, that's because..." My sister mumbles.
...Huh?
"Eh? What?"
"How should I say this..."
She avoids making eye contact, like a girl being asked, "Do you like someone?" by her crush. What!? What kind of reaction is that!? Stop acting so misleading! You're making my heart race, you know!?
"Because... you're my big sister..." "Eh!?"
No way. There was no sign of this at all. And now, all of a sudden—this huge display of affection!?
My little sister, with a natural blush on her cheeks—not from makeup—glanced at me from the side.
"I mean... I found out from online news that you got dumped, so I thought maybe I should at least be a little nice to you... or rather..."
".......... "
It was just a huge dose of pity. "That's not it, okay................... ?"
My little sister gave a graceful smile, looking as if she wanted to say, "Ah, yeah, it's fine, it's fine, okay, okay."
"Yeah, that's right." "That's not it!?"
"I might not be able to take the place of that person, but today, I'll be as kind to you as I can "
"You're avoiding saying the name on purpose!? What is this, Voldemort!? I'm fine! I'm not hurt, okay!?"
No matter how much I shout that it's a misunderstanding, it seems my sister has already decided that I'm just a pathetic woman who was toyed with by Mai.
Th-This girl...! I want to show her just how much Mai loves me.. !
Mai and I are totally lovey-dovey♡, you know...! It's really, really true............................................................. !?
"Now that I think about it, you haven't asked."
As I walk along the platform at Uma Station after getting off the train, I
turn back to look at my sister, who is still holding my hand like a little girl. "What?"
"Well, I mean, you haven't asked 'Where are we going?'" "It's a date, right?"
"Did 'date' ever mean something like a mystery tour...?" "What? What's a mystery tour?"
"Eh? Um... I think it's a travel plan where the destination is kept secret from the participants."
"Ohh, that sounds fun. It's kind of like a surprise prank, huh?" "Uh, yeah."
If it were my usual little sister, she'd probably glare at me like a thug and say, "Why do you even know that? Gross." But today, she hasn't...
Something feels off... Not that I mind her being nice or anything. I do like kind people, after all...
"I wish she were always like this..."
When I muttered that, my sister looked a little sulky. "Ahh, big sis, you said something unnecessary~." "Huh? Sorry."
"That statement really makes it clear how you see me on a regular basis~."
"It's just the truth!"
"Alright, date points: minus one." A finger was pointed at me.
"What do you mean by 'date points'...?"
"A date is about how much you can entertain the other person, I think. Even if you're acting differently than usual, or if it's just empty flattery, as long as it makes them enjoy themselves or gets their heart racing, it's justified. That's what I believe a date is."
"I feel like that's a valid opinion..." "Keeping that in mind, one more time."
My little sister's big eyes stare intently at me.
Receiving a gaze like that of a girlfriend eagerly waiting for an anniversary gift, I got completely flustered.
"Uh, um..."
Honestly, something like this is too embarrassing to say, but...
Relying on my sister's words, "Even if you're acting differently than usual," I put on an awkward smile.
"H-Haruna, you're always cute, but today you're especially cute." Haruna's reaction to those words was...
...a serious face.
...
...Say something!?
My shoulder was lightly patted. "Date points: +2."
"Ah! Did I recover!?"
"If you had said it more smoothly, you could've gotten 3 points." "I will improve!"
My sister muttered in a small voice, "Maybe I should've made her practice dating too... But if it was against that certain person, she would've been dumped either way..."
I haven't broken up with Mai!! "But well..."
My sister smiles cheerfully, just like a perfect girlfriend would.
"Even if it's just a compliment you don't mean, that's the vibe, . A date is basically like playing pretend—seeing how much you can enjoy acting like a couple."
"…Not really." "Huh?"
I say while averting my gaze.
"It's not like I don't mean it, but... My little sister is always cute." "Oh?"
My sister places her hand on her chin. "3 points."
"I'm not trying to score points!"
"That 'I'm not trying to score points!' already sounds like you are." "Dating is way too complicated!"
I hold my head in frustration. At this rate, I won't be able to say anything.
My sister laughs, narrowing her eyes. "Ahaha." Only her sleeping face and her laughing face look appropriate for her age. Other than that, she's a mature-looking, high-quality, high-class beauty of the Amaori family.
I'm also wearing the clothes I bought with my little sister the other day, so I think my outfit is decent enough... But why does it feel so different?
My sister looks undeniably stylish. She doesn't look like she's being overwhelmed by her clothes at all. Appearance-wise, she already looks almost no different from a high schooler. If anything, she looks more mature than me...? No way.
Well, I do think it's a good thing that Haruna-sensei, who teaches me about fashion, is on such a high level, but...
Isn't the gap between us a bit too big? "You know, little sister..."
"What?"
"So... do you have someone you're dating?"
Until now, we had never talked about this kind of thing as sisters. It was a somewhat embarrassing topic. My sister's cheeks were also turning red.
"H-Huh?"
"No, I mean... you just have this refined aura or something."
You give off such a beautiful-girl vibe that if you casually said, "Oh, I have a college lover ," I'd probably just go, "Oh, I see."
Maybe to hide her embarrassment, my sister squeezed our joined hands tightly.
"…I don't, though." "Eh? Really?"
"I don't. I've never had one." "Wow... That's unexpected."
"For now, I want to spend my time on club activities, friends, studying, and hobbies."
That's something a girl who could get a lover anytime would say...!
Well, I guess she really could if she wanted to. Actually, the hard part would be for the person dating my sister. She would probably expect her partner to have the same or even higher specs than her...
"I see, I see."
I do my best to smile cheerfully.
"If you get into a relationship, you should bring them home. Your big
sister will properly greet them for you." "Reaaally?"
Why are you looking at me like that? I acted properly even when I first met Seira-san and Minato-san, right??
But now that you mention it...
"I wonder... The kind of person who'd date my little sister probably seems like a super gal-type, strong-willed... That might be scary... Scary..."
Maybe someone like that hairstylist my sister introduced me to will show up. Like, 'Ohh, it's Onee-chan-chan! Yoroyoropi~☆' with that kind of vibe...
While I was busy being scared of my sister's girlfriend, she suddenly seemed to realize something.
"Umm…" "Hm?"
"…It's not like I like girls or anything, okay?" "Huh?"
When she said that, I realized.Come to think of it… I just assumed my sister's partner would be a girl? I did that completely unconsciously.
My sister muttered awkwardly.
"Well, I guess that's just normal for you, big sis." "No, that's not it!"
I shook my head vigorously.
"That's not what I mean! How should I put it?! It's just that it only applies to the person I'm dating! No! That's not it, okay!?"
"So, big sis, since when did you start liking girls?"
"Don't ask me like we're having some kind of heart-to-heart sisterly talk! I told you, it's not like that!"
My sister seemed to think I was just misunderstanding things. But she's wrong!
Before we knew it, we arrived at our destination.
After a ten-minute walk from there, nature that didn't quite fit in the city welcomed us. My sister's eyes sparkled like a child seeing Santa for the first time, and she let out an excited voice.
"It's a zoo!"
That's right, it's a zoo. Heh heh heh. My sister, still full of energy, turned around and clung to my arm. Hawa!
"Wow, it's been so long! Eh? Why, why?"
Ugh... A radiant beauty... So dazzling. I feel like I'm going to melt under my sister's gaze.
"Haruna, you've always liked zoos, haven't you?" "I love them!"
That's right, my sister loves zoos.
Even when we came as a family, she wanted to stay until the very last moment before closing. Back then, she stayed in front of the red panda exhibit the whole time, if I remember correctly.
That said, since that was back when she was in elementary school, I didn't expect her to still be this happy about it.
She's pretty cute, huh...
Feeling a bit smug, I ask my sister. "Did I earn some date points?" "30,000 points!"
"Choosing the location decides the outcome way too much!" "Hurry, let's buy the tickets! Let's line up and get them!" Feeling even more proud, I lifted my phone.
"I already bought them online. Now we just need to print them." "Big sis...! B-Big sis...!?"
What's with that reaction? I feel like my identity just got questioned. I'm still the same big sister on the inside!
"Since it's a date, I have to at least do this, right?" "You're getting too carried away!"
She lightly pats my back. The way she does it, like lovers playfully messing around, is actually more ticklish than anything.
"Alright, let's go."
"Yeah!"
My cheerful sister stayed clinging to my arm for a while after that.
… I can't walk properly…!?
This zoo, which has been around long before I was born, had hardly changed from how I remembered it. With the zoo map in one hand, we walk around the zoo.
"It's an elephant! It's so big!"
My sister already seems to have reverted to a little girl's vocabulary. "A monkey parent and child! They're eating leaves!"
The zoo was fairly crowded, but my sister didn't seem to mind at all. She kept running up to the enclosures one after another, excitedly shouting.
"Look! A tiger! There's a tiger! Whoa!"
"It's fine. It's in a cage, so it's not dangerous." "It's so big! Looks so strong! Whoa!"
Ignoring my silly comment, my sister faces the cage and roars, "Gaoo!"
My sister especially likes big animals and carnivores. The reason? "Because they look strong."
I don't really get it, but somehow, I kind of do. She must like that extraordinary feeling.
Even so, my sister, who just a moment ago seemed so mature, was now jumping around like a three-year-old, creating quite the contrast. Of
course, in a good way.
"Wow, those fangs are amazing. A human would probably go down in one hit… So cool…"
My sister murmurs dreamily.
Wait. Is she… jealous of the tiger? Do you… want power? "Don't you ever go to the zoo with friends?"
My sister smiles like she just saw someone who calls every game console a "Famicom."
"No way, I don't go. That's so childish!"
Aren't second-year middle schoolers still kids…!?
"Everyone goes to cafés and stuff, you know. At most, maybe an aquarium?"
"Ah. Now that you mention it, I do have the impression that aquariums are the go-to place for outings. Why isn't it the zoo?"
"Isn't it because zoos are mainly for families? You have to walk a lot, and your feet get tired. It's hot in summer and cold in winter. And there's the smell, too."
My sister happily badmouths the zoo, counting on her fingers. Then, she suddenly flashes a smile at me.
"I mean, I can't get this excited in front of my friends." "Really?"
"It's way too childish!"
Well, I guess… Unlike me, my sister probably has to think about how others see her. She's usually really responsible, after all.
"Is it okay to act like this in front of me?" My sister looked completely puzzled. "Huh? But you're my big sister, aren't you?"
With no explanation at all. As if that alone was enough to explain everything. Maybe I'm just imagining it, but… it felt like something that couldn't just be summed up with 'because we're family' or something like that. I felt an immense sense of trust.
No, but that's definitely just a misunderstanding. If she really trusted me, she would have already confided all her worries to me by now.
Just a little, my chest ached. Without noticing how I felt, my sister smiled. ''Coming here alone feels kind of weird, but coming after so long is fun!'' ''Hmm… That's good.''
That really is true. However, for some reason, my sister stepped closer to me.
''What about you, big sis?'' "Huh?"
Suddenly being stared at, I panicked and raised both my hands. "It's fun, of course. I like animals too."
"Then look like you're having more fun! Come on! Hurry up!"
"Eh!?"
That's such an unreasonable demand… I timidly raised my right hand. "Y-Yay… So fun…"
A flood of criticism came my way.
"You're being too shy! Even the animals are doing this as a business, you know? They won't put on a show for customers who don't look like they're having fun!"
"I don't think that's true!"
"Ah! Because you don't look like you're having fun, the tiger is going deeper inside! See!"
"Yay! Super fun!"
"Smile from your gut more!" "So fun!!"
"You're being too loud, big sis. The tiger is going deeper inside again!" "You… seriously, you… you…"
I seriously want to deduct a huge amount of date points from her...
"Alright, next is the polar bear! Big sis, make sure to smile properly again, okay?"
"Yay!"
At this rate, I'm not a lover—I'm just a puppet! After that, I was repeatedly made to smile until my facial muscles were on the verge of
cramping... Somehow, even my mood started getting weird...
We had lunch inside the zoo, then went to see the seals. While taking a break, we were amazed by the giraffe's presence up close.
My sister and I kept going back and forth through the crowds without getting bored. We explored every corner of the zoo, from reptiles to birds. And so, we spent the entire time enjoying the zoo.
Before we knew it, it was closing time.
When I went on a date in Odaiba with Mai, and when I went to an amusement park with Ajisai-san, it was the same—dates always seem to end in the blink of an eye. After making a full round, we found ourselves back in front of the tiger's cage.
''But too bad, huh, big sis?'' "What?"
"The koalas. Even though you like them." "Ah, yeah."
This zoo doesn't have koalas. That's a bit disappointing, but oh well. "Today's main star isn't me, it's my little sister."
"That sounded a bit fake. Zero points." "That's not what I meant..."
I laugh in exasperation.
"But today's total was pretty good."
"No way. You didn't actually count, did you?" "Well, who knows?"
My sister smirks. Huh? No way... could she have really counted...? Acting all mysterious, my sister stretches out.
"Still, you did pretty well, big sis. It actually turned into a proper date. Totally unexpected. I mean, back when we went shopping, you were such a mess, freaking out everywhere."
"You really didn't have to add that."
"I mean, all I ever see of you at home is your totally lame self, so this was seriously unexpected."
"Second sentence!"
My sister, who knows exactly where to tease me, laughs with a sound like 'ahaha.'
This...
Well, but if you had fun, I'm glad. I have to make sure you have fun, at least. Because from now on, I'm going to talk about something not fun.
"Hey, Haruna."
When I call her name, her large sparkling eyes look toward me. "What?"
Even though I knew the time to go home had long passed, I looked like I was still staying in the classroom, not wanting to go home, with a face like that.
"I heard about school."
Haruna was still wearing a faint smile.
"Big sis, you made a promise when you left this morning, right?" "Yes."
"Are you breaking the promise?"
Rather than blaming me, my sister just said it in a lonely way. The pain in my chest grew stronger.
But I nodded. "Yeah."
My sister sighed as if she had given up.
"Ahh… I wonder why. The way home is gonna be awkward, you know? You should've at least held back until we got home. Big sis, you seriously do this kind of thing all the time. You're way too bad at handling things."
My sister smiled as if she were saying, "Well, that's just how it is."
"Today was actually pretty fun, though. So, all of this was just to get information out of me, huh? Even the point-scoring, all of it."
I stayed silent.
My sister pointed at me and laughed as I stayed silent. "In the end, your total date points dropped to zero."
"Yeah, I guess I can't complain if you call it point-scoring." I quietly admitted it.
"But I think at least a little of it got through." "What ?"
As my sister asked back, I answered awkwardly. "Uh… that I actually like you quite a bit, Haruna."
My little sister seemed somewhat surprised by my words.
The aspect that made this outing clearly different from before. It was the fact that this was a date for my sister.
Until now, I had always been the one receiving help from her. Even going to the hair salon, even shopping—everything was like that. Even though Haruna did everything for me, I was never able to give anything back to her.
It's only natural that she wouldn't trust me like this. No matter how much I say it, there's no way she'd believe me. So I decided to take action to remove Haruna's emotional walls. In the end… that, too, is just my own selfishness.
But that's fine. Haruna has always been a part of me. "This."
I took a small package out of my bag.
While we were walking around the zoo, I secretly bought it without my sister noticing. My younger sister, having received it, timidly opened the package. A round wolf plush toy, attached to a keychain, appeared.
"Haruna, I thought you might like something like this." "A wolf?"
"Probably."
My younger sister looked a bit taken aback and let out a small sigh. "The plush toy in my room—it's not a wolf, you know."
"Huh? Really?"
"It's a dingo."
"I didn't know that..."
Dingoes are more like dogs. They're apparently a type of wild dog that lives in Australia.
A near miss...! "Should I return it...?"
"I've already opened it. This is fine." "Yes..."
Sigh... I can't look cool. "Anyway, that's how it is!"
I reluctantly wrap up the conversation.
"I might break promises, try to earn points, and be an irresponsible big sister. Even so, if Haruna isn't looking happy like usual, I can't do it! I'll
do anything for that!"
I thought I'd act like an older sister until the end today, but it seems impossible after all.
"Now, I'm going to talk about something important!"
I make that opening statement with the intention of reinforcing my resolve.
My sister looks back at me while holding the plush toy with both hands.
It's okay. It will definitely go well. I've set everything up until now. My feelings should surely have been conveyed to Haruna.
I'm nervous.
"The other day, I heard from Seira-san and Minato-san. They said Haruna is alone at school. And I heard that the reason Haruna got angry was for my sake, after all."
"... "
Haruna doesn't respond.
I unilaterally make a demand, believing that it will surely be for both of our sake.
"It's about time I want you to tell me. Why did you stop going to school? Why are you trying to be alone now?"
"Why is my always pure and righteous sister doing something she can't tell anyone?"
"Tell me, your big sister."
Haruna, with her arms crossed, closed her eyes just for a moment. "Sigh."
She let out a sigh.
The air that envelops us changes.
"I see, I see. Finally, it's been found out."
Normally, this would be the moment to give up. Even at a point where the real culprit would normally start spilling their motive to the detective, Haruna's voice still sounded overly optimistic and untrustworthy.
"Fine. If it's been found out to that point, I'll tell you. However, it's not about what I'm trying to do, but only about why I'm trying to do it."
I furrow my brow at her roundabout way of speaking. "Yeah."
Even so, I wanted to hear Haruna's words. Haruna grips the stuffed toy with one hand and smiles.
"If people find out that you're an introvert, it'd be inconvenient." "…What?"
"I mean, think about it. I went through all that effort to bring you back onto the right path, didn't I? Then I should have the right to enjoy at least a little bit of the benefits, right?"
Benefits…? What do you mean by that? "What do you mean?"
"If big sister is super extroverted, popular in class, and even close with
famous people… then as her little sister, I must be special too. Right?" Driven by baseless feelings, I deny my sister's words.
"That's a lie. You always tell me that relying on someone else's influence, like a fox borrowing a tiger's authority, is the most uncool thing."
"It just means I was your little sister."
"If that were true, you would have looked more guilty when it was found out."
"Maybe I'm just playing it cool." "I can't believe it."
"I knew you'd say that."
If this wasn't an act and was actually Haruna's true nature, then it would mean I never really understood anything about her, despite all the time we spent together.
There's no way that's true.
"But it's already been found out, you know?" I pressed closer to Haruna .
"Minato-san told you, didn't she? That I used to be an introvert. Minato- san's older sister was my former classmate… So no matter what you say, Haruna, it's already too late, isn't it…?""
"That's why you need to work hard enough to blow away those silly rumors, big sis."
As if she were cheering for me, Haruna clenches her fist tightly. From
the way she spoke so deliberately, I realized—ah, she had simply switched the mask she wore.
Does she really think that makes sense?
"It's impossible at this point! Because Minato-san's older sister, Nashiji Komachi-san is..."
She was the one who excluded me.
No matter what Haruna and I say, it's pointless. "…What about Minato's older sister?"
Haruna narrows her eyes, emanating an ominous aura. I flinched for a moment.
I hurriedly changed the subject.
"No, what I mean is… if a former classmate spreads it, there's nothing we can do."
"Why do you always assume that? You're always like this—thinking you can't do it. That's strange, isn't it?"
Haruna crossed her arms and looked back at me.
"You won't know unless you try. I'm not backing down, and I can already see myself winning through persistence. So don't get in my way."
If Haruna just stayed quiet like this… Or if I just continued my school life as usual, would the rumors really disappear?
If the rumors don't disappear…
If everyone finds out that I used to be an introvert, not just in middle
school but also at Ashigaya High School…
The members of Quintet might not change. But what about everyone else's reactions?
If the rumors spread that I was a former truant and a bullied kid, then… Even though I'm in Quintet, the people who have respected me until now might start to distance themselves. The people who cheered me on, like during the sports festival, will be gone.
People might talk behind my back, saying that even though I'm just an introvert, I'm getting full of myself. I might end up feeling out of place.
I can't believe in people's goodwill. I can't just assume everything will be fine and be optimistic.
No matter how much people say it's wrong, there are still cheaters everywhere, people who disconnect on purpose, and people who verbally abuse both their opponents and their own teammates—they won't disappear.
If you show any weakness, the malice of the world will bare its fangs and come after you. If only I could live with the strong belief that everything will be fine because my precious friends understand me… how nice that would be.
At least, I can't. But.
"But if things stay like this, Haruna will…"
"The idea of you worrying about me is a hundred years too early."
Haruna always says that. Acting composed, saying, "I can do it, because I'm different from you."
However, at this moment, I was finally able to doubt those words. I wonder what the truth really was. Could it be that she's been dealing with everything inside herself, just so she wouldn't burden me?
All this time.
"It's fine, just focus on yourself. You've finally had your high school debut and made lots of good friends. There are plenty of other things you should focus on, right?"
In the bath together, Haruna said that and laughed. I thought she was just teasing me like always… but could it have been different?
I grabbed Haruna's wrist.
Even if I accepted all the disadvantages that fall upon me. If my life just became a little harder to live, if it means Haruna could return to the right path.
"W-What?"
"Then I'll say it at school tomorrow." "Huh?"
I looked into Haruna's eyes and declared. "That I was a former introvert and a truant."
Immediately after, Haruna grabbed me by the collar. "What are you saying?"
She must have realized that I was serious.
The fact that she understood me so clearly made me think, "Yeah, we really are sisters."
Hiding my fear, I met Haruna's gaze.
"Then Haruna won't have any reason to be stubborn anymore, right?" Haruna's entire plan will go up in smoke.
"Are you stupid? No one wants that."
She brought her face close to mine, intimidating me. If I take even one step back, I feel like I'll be completely overwhelmed by her intensity.
"Even I…"
Contrary to my racing heartbeat, my mind is growing cold. "I didn't ask you for this, Haruna, did I?"
"I'm doing this for myself! What about you!? It's different, isn't it!? There's no benefit for you!"
"There is."
I state firmly.
"I can repay Haruna for what I owe her, even if just a little." "Are you stupid!?"
She shoves my shoulder, and I fall on my butt. The clothes I just bought get dirty. My sister yells, as if she doesn't even notice.
"I don't like that kind of self-sacrifice!"
"Then, why, Haruna—?" "Huh?"
"Saying it's all for yourself—that's a lie, isn't it? Even without someone like me, you can do anything, right? You're the one sacrificing yourself for me, aren't you, Haruna?"
"That's not true! There's no way I'd go this far for someone like you!" Haruna's enraged eyes looked like flames were dancing in them.
"I won't forgive you. If you do something like that, I will never forgive you."
My sister growls as if spitting out embers. Haruna's intense personality went beyond what I expected at the last moment.
"I'll set it on fire." "Huh…?"
What is she saying…?
"If you expose it yourself, I'll burn the house down." "Wait, that's…"
I stand up and instinctively grab Haruna's shoulder. She shakes me off. "I'm serious."
Maybe, until now, I had never seen Haruna truly angry.
It was a fury so intense, it felt like my fingertips would turn to charcoal if I touched it.
"Why go that far?" "Because I'm serious."
That day, Haruna went home first.
The words of rage, hammered in like a wedge, continue to burn in my heart.
***
All my memories with Haruna are just fights.
Ever since we were kids. I've heard all close-in-age sisters are like this, but Haruna was especially extreme—she never knew how to compromise.
Until I learned to bend easily, we were constantly fighting. The only time Haruna was cute was when she was really little. After that, she was always one-upping me.
She'd constantly throw sharp words at me, comment on my fashion and makeup, look down on me, and make me feel bad by comparing me to her more accomplished sister.
Having a sister really doesn't come with a single good thing.
Unlike friends, family is always there when you come home, and you can't just walk away. That closeness always ends up suffocating me.
And yet...
Why is it that I still can't distance myself from her?
Why is it that the day after I hated her so much I wanted to kill her, I end up loving her more than anyone else?
Amaori Haruna. My one and only sister.
She's my own flesh and blood. Like a part of me.
What was all that "I'll never forgive you" nonsense, anyway? That's what I should be saying.
There's one more thing I've come to understand: just as Haruna is my little sister, I'm her big sister too.
I never realized I had such intense anger sleeping inside me.
This is it—a true sister fight. One so big it could burn everything between us to ash. A once-in-a-lifetime clash.
I don't exactly know what she's trying to do or who she's doing it for, but...
The reason doesn't matter anymore. It just doesn't. Haruna really means it.
Alright. In that case, I'll do things the way I want to. I'll go all in too.
***
That zoo date with Haruna already feels like a distant memory.
But in reality, it was just the next day. I gathered all of Quintet on the rooftop during lunch break.
"Class reunion?"
Mai, Ajisai-san, and Kaho-chan all said at the same time. "Yeah."
Since yesterday, I've been trying hard not to let the frustration churning inside me show, and I forced a tense smile.
"Before we start, there's something I want to tell you all."
"I knew I'd get scared if I waited for their reactions, so I decided to say it all at once."
"The truth is… back in middle school, I was kind of a shut-in and an introvert."
To start, I decided to lay my entire past bare to the four of them. And then...
"Eh!?"
First, Kaho-chan widened her big eyes in surprise.
Well, I guess I should say… that was the only response.
Huh!?
"Come on, Ajisai-san!" "Ah, oh... I see"
When I called her out by name, Ajisai-san nodded quickly.
She kind of looks like she's trying to accept a shocking truth that left her speechless… but probably not really.
No way… I was supposed to be pulling off the perfect extrovert act… "Why!? How!? Weren't you always the queen of extroverts, Rena-chin!?" The only one who's genuinely shocked is Kaho-chan.
Still, this isn't the time to smirk and go "Hehe, fooled you ♡".
The truth is, I tricked Kaho-chan with a pathetic little lie. "Uh, y-yeah, um… I truly apologize…"
"Why!? Why, why!? Whyyy!?" "Ugh…"
I thought rage might fuel me, but I don't think it will. I'm only mad at my sister - betraying Kaho's trust just plain hurts. I feel like I'm being torn apart.
Then Satsuki-san gently places her hand on Kaho-chan's head.
"If you keep this up, Kaho, lunch break will be over. You can chew her out later. So, then?"
"Uh, um… I'm sorry, should I start with a full-on kneel apology?" "That's enough. So?"
Leaving behind Kaho-chan, who clearly wanted to keep interrogating, it looked like I had no choice but to follow Chairwoman Satsuki's lead and move the conversation forward.
My heart! It aches!
Is this my punishment for lying? I never should have lied in the first place!
"So, um… if Haruna's being so stubborn, I figured it's probably my fault… and that's why I thought…"
But now I can't tell everyone the truth anymore.
Even if threatening to burn the house was just a bluff, the moment I believed she might really do it… I had already lost.
So then… what do I do now?
Looking around at everyone, I began to speak.
"I said, let's just pretend the past never happened." I'd told myself that countless times.
"The future's the only thing we can change. The past is unchangeable." But… is that really true?
Haruna once said to me—
"You always decide things too fast. You're always like, 'I can't do this, that's impossible.' But you don't even know until you try."
It stings to admit she's right… but I can't deny it.
"If I erase my past as an introvert, whatever Haruna's trying to do will be meaningless—that's the idea."
I copied Satsuki-san's style and gave a smug little laugh. "Serves her right!"
Ajisai gently warned me:
"Rena-chan, you shouldn't say things like that..." "Oh—right…"
I immediately quieted down.
I mean, I was mad at my sister, not anyone else…
Then Mai, who had been quietly watching everything unfold, continued the conversation with her usual elegant tone.
"But seriously, what are you planning? Gonna build a time machine or something?"
"That sounds fun. While you're at it, I'd love to see a world where Mai and I never met."
"Haha."
Mai gave Satsuki-san a "you rascal" kind of smile. Honestly, I don't think she was joking.
"Well, it's not like I can actually build a time machine."
I mean, even if I could go back in time and save gloomy little middle school Renako, then I probably wouldn't have even tried to change myself by enrolling in Ashigaya High.
If I never met Mai and the others, there's no way I'd be happier than I am now.
"So what I'll be using... is this."
In other words, we're circling back to the start. "The class reunion invitation…?"
I explained to Ajisai-san, who tilted her head as she looked at the invitation I'd yanked from my drawer.
"Honestly, back in middle school, I was barely noticeable. I don't think
anyone even remembers me."
It took a bit of guts to admit that in front of everyone, but I pulled it off. No doubt—this is the power of pure rage.
"So I'm going to overwrite their memories—by flaunting my flashy high school self, I'll make them think, 'Come to think of it, wasn't Amaori always like that?'"
Before anyone could speak up, I thrust my hand forward.
"I know it's reckless! But to stop the rumors from even starting, I'll crush the source! This, right here, is my time machine!"
The four of them looked at each other, unsure of what to say. Then, to my surprise, someone spoke up in support.
"I think it's a good idea." It was Satsuki-san.
"What…? Satsuki-san, who always starts by rejecting others like it's her job, is actually supporting me…!? This is a once-in-a-century miracle!"
"Maybe I'll take it back after all."
"No! I'd really appreciate it if you could tell me your reason!" Satsuki-san reluctantly began to explain.
"Human memory is fuzzy. Most people don't figure out who you are based on your past—they shape your past from how you look now, because that's what's in front of them. Impressions matter more than facts. It might sound dramatic to say you're changing the past, but when
it comes to other people's memories, it's actually possible." But Satsuki-san simply added, "Of course."
"If you can really leave that strong of an impression, that is." "Thank you! Hearing that really gives me confidence!"
And when it comes to rewriting impressions, I actually have a good chance. Because when it comes to being a popular type, I've got friends who shine like stars.
"So… please, everyone. Help me teach my stubborn little sister a lesson—lend me your strength!"
I bowed my head with all my heart. I know it's selfish to ask after deceiving all four of them until now.
Even so, there's no one I trust more than these four. "I don't mind helping, but…"
The first to speak was Ajisai-san, the angel of Ashigaya. You've seriously saved my life more times than I can count…! "So, what should we do?"
"Isn't it easy?"
Then Kaho-chan jumped into the conversation.
"Can't Maimai, Sa-chan, or A-chan just walk into the reunion and say, 'I'm Amaori Renako, pyon!' or something?"
"No way we could fool them like that!?"
Ajisai fired back at Kaho with full force. Even when making retorts, she looked adorable - truly angelic.
"That won't work? What if we wore name tags around our necks?" "Definitely not... We'd never keep our stories consistent..."
"Hey, we could use intercoms! This is getting exciting - feels like a spy mission or something!"
"No way... We just graduated a year ago..."
Kaho-chan kept joking around like she was serious, and Ajisai-san kept giving her genuine retorts with a slightly troubled look.That scene was the very picture of peace at Ashigaya.
As much as I wanted to keep watching, I didn't want Ajisai-san to suddenly snap and go, "Fine, let's just do that!" So I gently stepped in to stop it.
"I really appreciate the thought, Kaho-chan… but that's not quite it." "Not that?"
Mai smiled, as if she already knew exactly what I wanted to say.
"Ugh… After everything I've asked from you all, it feels really selfish to say this, but… this time, I really think I need to do it myself…"
"Even though you're saying 'just this once,' I bet you'll keep relying on everyone's help without hesitation."
Satsuki-san's sharp remark hit me right in the chest. She's not wrong! "But still!"
At that point, I stood my ground. "I want to do it—me, myself!"
I pressed a hand to my chest and cried out. "Because this is a fight my sister started with me!"
I know. I'm being completely selfish. Then, Ajisai-san let out a quiet giggle.
"You've got that side to you too, huh, Rena-chan?" "Ugh…"
But it didn't seem like she meant anything bad. Ajisai-san smiled softly.
"I get it. With family, sometimes you just can't help being stubborn. I'm glad to know you feel that way about Haruna-chan."
"True. Sometimes, when you're trying to achieve something, you just can't compromise on how to do it—especially when it involves someone you see as a rival you don't want to lose to."
Satsuki-san gave a shrug as Mai looked her way.
"Well, it's not like Rena-chin's selfishness just started. She's already holding huge bouquets in both hands, after all."
My face grew hot as they said that. Mai and Ajisai-san were laughing cheerfully.
"But if you've come this far, I take it you already know what you want us to do?"