Bella shut the door behind her.
Despite it being 11am, the Ever After was quiet.
Empty. Devoid of any living thing apart from-of course-the bundles of flowers that stuck out of almost overflowing pots.
Sunlight peeked through the open shutters, bathing the library in warm hues. She was surprised at how different it looked in the daytime. It looked normal-like nothing above the ordinary occurred within its walls.
Her eyes ransacked through her surroundings until they found Seth behind the welcoming desk. He was flipping through a book casually as though nothing was wrong.
Still, there was no sign of Miles.
Bella approached him. Her jaw locked. She ignored the flutter in her heart. Her thoughts scraped her back like knives chafing away flakes of skin.
"Where's Miles?" She demanded. When Seth didn't look up, she struck the table with her fist. Bella ignored the resulting ache in her hands.
"Where is he? You better not be sending him on another mission-"
"He's dead."
She paused.
Her lips parted. Seth was still looking down, strands of his dark hair falling over his eyes. The hand gripping his cane tightened.
Her words knotted in her throat. Bella gripped the table. "That's a sick thing to joke about. Tell me where he actually is."
Every word was breathless-teethering between choking despair and anger.
Seth still didn't look up.
Bella knocked the book he was reading off the table. Her lips trembled. She banged the table harder.
Now, he looked up.
His eyes were devoid of the sparkle. Empty of warmth.
He looked tired.
Her skin prickled. She hissed, low and threatening. "Tell me where he is."
"I already told you. He's dead." Seth whispered. It was soft. Quiet yet the alarms that shut off were loud-thunderous. Deafening.
Her insides turned to stone. "But I don't understand. There was only one body! Miles said he'd call the police once he got out! He-"
"He did call the police-" Seth's gaze leveled with hers.
"-before he died. The revenant shared a memory with him that severed our communication. He contained her too early-the jar exploded. And she-"
"-killed him." The word was foul. Bitter. It tasted like the apple cider vinegar her mother used to force her to drink-but it was worse.
Much worse.
"I'm so sor-"
"Don't. Just don't." Her fingers quivered. Sweat slithered down her brow. Then spilled down her cheeks.
Her eyes burnt.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
Bella didn't look back. She couldn't.
With every step, she could feel the weight of his gaze. The weight of the reality that she was now trapped in.
Locked in-with no escape.
She slipped out of the library. The sun blazed like it was angry at the world-for the evil committed.
For the blood shed.
Dead.
The word hit her like an alarm in the morning-loud yet faint. Like notes that misaligned-out of sync. Discordant.
Her lips pressed together.
Her grip tightened on the steering wheel as soon as she entered the car. Bella tilted her head to stare at the passenger seat. Where he had sat just days ago-after spending over a day in the hospital.
After the near death sentence. As Doctor Doris put it, one more round of caffeine intoxication-he was dead.
Gone.
It would have been funny if her throat didn't ache-if it had been someone else.
The car had been quiet on that drive. At the time, she wanted to say so many things.
That she hated the way he couldn't trust her-it reminded her of their childhood.
That she hated the way he worked himself to death.
That she hated how stubborn he was.
Bella gritted her teeth. So stubborn.
But even with all that, she wanted to say she was grateful-grateful that he was alive. Grateful that he didn't die. Grateful that he was there.
But now, he wasn't.
Bella pushed the key into the ignition before the car reverberated to life.
"I really need a car, you know."
Miles gave her a blank look. "Do I lo-ok like I manufac-ture cars out of th-in air?"
She rolled her eyes. "No. But you can at least buy one for me. And by the time I'm rich, I'd give it back."
"How abo-ut you get rich, bu-y your own car and kee-p it?"
Bella punched him in the shoulder then stuck her tongue at him. "I hate you, idiot."
"The feel-ing's mutual, Miss Broke."
Bella sighed. Now she had the car. All to herself. She drove in a daze-unable to feel, taste, think.
Bella felt.... numb.
As soon as she reached the driveway, she stepped out. Bella locked the car. She laid her hand on the glass. Bella pressed her cheek into it.
It was cold. Smooth. She could almost smell his sanitizer.
"You shou-ld stay here. Yo-u can't go back to your hot-el in this stat-e."
She lifted her face. Her chest tightened. She walked into the house but the silence made her steps heavier. It echoed in her ears-now that her innards were forced into an unwanted stillness.
Now, her stomach didn't coil like the time she wanted to punch Miles in the face-or churn with vigor like the time they set out to meet Seth in the dead of the night.
Now, she felt nothing.
Absolutely nothing.
Bella walked into the house before shutting the door behind her.
The slam echoed through the house.
Her gaze strayed to the sink directly beside the shoe rack, a few feet away from the door.
"You're such a a clean freak."
"Is it so har-d to just wash your ha-nds?"
"Well I already washed it before I left the house you idiot!"
Bella dragged herself to the couch. She grabbed her phone from the table.
For a second, she stared at the phone. At the blank screen.
Dead.
Her chest squeezed again. Bella switched it on. She resisted the urge to scroll through her Instagram feed and instead settled on checking through her messages.
A new text popped up.
It was from Doris.
Her hands trembled. Bella swallowed.
Deep breaths.
How would she even break the news to her?
She shook her head. Now, is not the time.
So, when is?
Bella ignored it. She stalled-she scrolled through her other messages. She reread, re-replied messages, all with the guise of avoiding Doris' message.
After she wasted a good fifteen minutes , she finally opened it.
Bella inhaled.
Good morning. How are you doing? I hope everything has been okay with you.
So.... how is Miles? I hope you've emptied the coffee bags as I told you to. The withdrawal symptoms would be intense initially but it would wear off eventually.
Give it time.
I know it must be frustrating having to deal with him-I get the feeling. He can be stubborn. Annoying. Stupid, even. But he's a wonderful person. Wonderful boy. Even though, he'd never accept it but I care about him . Like I do every single one of my sons. So please take care of him. Watch him. Protect him. Do what is necessary-do what you have to.
The last time he came to the hospital, he told me he was fine. He said he was a police officer. He said he could take care of himself.
But the protectors are the ones who need the most protection sometimes. So please, look out for him.
Either way, that's it for now. I look forward to seeing both of you soon. Think you could help me drag him out for a movie night? I promise snacks 🌚.
Bella couldn't breathe.
Her lungs were on fire. Cold, empty air grazed her neck-hollow and weightless. The silence haunted her-pulled at her from different angles.
The memories bounced around like smoke that followed a fire-suffocating.
Pungent.
She did the one thing she could think of.
Bella hurled her phone at the wall.
A sickening snap ricocheted as soon as the phone struck the wall.
Billions of shards skidded across the floor. Pieces scattered everywhere-tiny flecks stinging her arms, bouncing across the tiles.
Her pulse raced. Her ears rang.
She waited for the relief. For the comfort. For withdrawal from the noises-from the thoughts.
From the feelings.
Do you alw-ays have to mak-e a mess?
Her thoughts-colored with Miles' familiar tone- echoed in the chambers of her mind. Heat seared her chest. Her fingers itched.
Bella snatched the book she'd been reading from the table. Her fingers twitched. With tensed muscles, she tore pages out. One by one. Breath after breath.
She tore until all the pages were lieing around her like dead birds-unwanted like the memories that throbbed in her mind. Aching for attention-for acknowledgment.
For her.
That's a horr-ible way to wast-e a book.
Bella ground her teeth.
Swiveling, she seized the old radio Miles used to listen to.
She smashed it against the floor. She bashed it until the wires were peeking through, screws unhinged and buttons loose.
Do-n't do that!
With everything she broke, Miles' voice continued to pester her. Unyielding. Uncontrollable.
Bella scrambled to the kitchen.
She wrenched the cabinets open.
Without hesitation, she seized the plates and sent them spiraling to the floor. The sound of breaking China ware sliced through the air.
One.
Two.
Three.
Four.
Five.
Six.
Every single one Miles liked-every single one he used.
She didn't stop even when shards cut through her fingers. Even when blood spilled out of wounds. Even when her stomach grumbled for food.
Why are yo-u hurting your-self?
She rushed to the dining area and threw the chair Miles usually sat at the wall.
She kicked it. Her vision wobbled. Her breath came out in fast gasps. Even with her throbbing leg, she still kicked. Vicious. Vengeful.
Angry.
Bella continued until her leg got caught in the frame. She lost her balance. A nail slashed through her skin.
Pain erupted down her leg.
Bella hissed, untangling herself from the frame slowly before cradling her leg. Her throat tightened.
Trying to soothe it, she blew-only to intensify the sting.
Do you n-eed help? Do-n't worry it's going to be ok-
"No it won't! Nothing is okay!"
Miles voice in her head went silent but, she was too angry to notice.
"Why didn't you just listen to me?! This wouldn't have happened if you had just done what you were supposed to-rest! But no you just had to be a hero-the save everyone but himself kind. And now you're dead!"
The silence echoed. It was loud. Brutal. Her voice lingered in the air as there was no one to receive it. No one to respond back.
Bella sniffled. She tried to imagine his response.
Don't be childi-sh. This is wh-at I have to do. What I n-eed to.
"You don't have to. You don't need to. Someone else could do it. Someone else could have done it."
I can do it. I can prot-ect them. I am strong enou-
"You're weak." She spat. The venom was thick in her mouth. Her wounds throbbed. Knives sunk into her back.
But all of the pain couldn't amount to the way her insides twisted. It couldn't amount to the pain that pricked needles into her skin.
"You're nothing. Your body failed you. Your mind failed you. You're stupid."
The silence stretched around her like a black hole that sucked all life-even energy. For a moment, she could barely feel her injuries-her legs, her arms.
Then, there was a whisper. One she wasn't sure erupted from her mind. It breezed past her cheek.
Soft. Soothing-like cool air whooshing past her on a hot day.
"Maybe I was weak. Maybe I was tired. Maybe I was stupid. But I'm satisfied. Because I did it all with no regrets-I protected those who needed saving. I loved those I cared about."
The world blurred around her.
It sounded like Miles yet there was no stammer. No stutter. It was clear. Smooth like the Bahel Waterfall.
The smell of blood congealed the air. Her lips quirked.
"You protected others. You loved others. Everyone apart from your family. That's great. That's a life well lived indeed."
A piercing headache hit her skull. She gnashed her teeth.
"Our family isn't great. Our father was an abuser. Our mother is a manipulator. They did their damage-on both of us. But, I've let go."
Bella felt queasy. She swallowed down the bike that pushed up her throat.
She shook her head.
"Really? That's rich coming from you."
"I'm serious. Coming face to face with what I could be-i'd rather forget. Let go -if it means maintaining my sanity. If it means I can cherish the ones I care about. Doris. The staff and the elderly at Willow's Crest-"
"-You. If it means I can have the one thing the revenant can't-I will."
Bella slurred, "What's that?"
"Love. Peace. Family. Connection."
"Humanity."
She barely recognized the still small voice as she fell closer to oblivion.
Somewhere far away, she heard someone laugh.
It was Miles.
It was rich. Not dying. Not dead.
But alive-in the fullest way possible. Free.
That was the last thing she heard before the tether to reality broke.
Then darkness swallowed her world