"They shot at you!?"
"Fuck oath they did. They also thought I was a damn monster."
"Well to be fair you are a monster."
"Okay… fair… I'll wear that one."
Whilst the two neanderthals sat opposite me, I spoke with Snow about how my encounter with humans, for the first time since my revival, has been an absolute shit show.
These sickos shot at my meal and then shot at me before I could even ask them why. They also seem extremely on edge as if I did something that deserves their mirth.
The balls on these people.
Conversing with Snow, we discuss how to approach this situation. We had already spoken about how we would go about ingratiating ourselves with human society, but we hadn't accounted for instant assassination attempts in our planning.
Taking a peek at the two crazy people I watch them flinch at my gaze. I would flinch two if the guy I just tried to murder didn't know what to do with you.
Deciding the silence isn't ideal I try to have a conversation with them… again.
"Soooooo… could you explain why you shot my dinner?"
…
Both of their jaws dropped. I swear I could see the back of the guys throat his jaw fell so far.
"W-hy?", the girl said, half stuttering, "because its poison. Don't you know that?"
… Ah. They were trying to stop me from eating the poison. But even so… did they have to shoot it with a fucking sniper rifle? Couldn't a shout suffice?
"So… you shot my meal with a fucking mana infused sniper round because you didn't want me to eat it? But then you shot at me at close range so am I to assume that was an accident orrrr…?"
Clearly, they got what I'm putting down as their eyes widened at the realisation.' It's the 'you saved me and then tried to kill me' trope.
"N-no. Y-y-you-u misunderstand." The guy tried to defend themselves as he put his body in front of the girl, aiming to protect her. However, that is highly unnecessary as I'm not fucking crazy like these two.
I may have spent a year and a half in the jungle with no human contact whilst occasionally burning down cities and committing local genocide but I'm still not that crazy.
I stare at the two blankly whilst they cower in fear as if I've done something.
"Would you two stop letting your imagination run wild. I'm not going to hurt you. Sit down," I saw whilst looking at the guy.
The guy complied but not because he relaxed at all but more so out of fear. Honestly these two are a pain.
"Could you please explain to me why your so afraid of me. I haven't done anything to you. In fact, you're the bastards that attacked me. The fuck do you get off with being scared for."
God these two have dumbfounded written all over their faces. They don't seem too bright.
"We apologise for attacking you, a-and for fearing you. But you're not exactly… normal. You look human, I m-mean, you are human, but we've never met someone as fast as you. Or someone that eats the corruption without dying. You seem accustomed to it though. To us you are an unknown, and that makes you dangerous. We didn't mean anything by attacking you. Punch first, ask questions later, you know. Rule of survival."
…
Huh…
That actually made a lot of sense.
I stay silent a while as I relay his words to Snow. They probably think I'm considering his words but really, I'm comparing his actions with Snow's a few months ago when we met.
"Do you reckon most people I meet will try to kill me on sight?"
"Definitely. You have a punch-able face."
I'd argue but it seems most people want to kill me when they meet me so maybe I do have a punch-able face.
It wasn't an issue before the day I died. Valentine killed me, then the reapers tried to kill me, then the Goddess revived me when all the corrupt creatures tried to kill me, followed by Snow trying to kill me and now these guys tried to kill me.
Guess I'm not good at getting killed.
Addressing the pair I say, "can't argue with that" and shrug my shoulders.
Once again, the pair were dumbfounded. Honestly, if every little thing is going to make these two drop their jaws like this then they'll die of shock before turning forty.
"We got off on the wrong foot, so let's start over. My name is Rey Stein. What about you two?"
…
I think I saw the girl's soul leave her body. Get a grip already!
"Mark… and this is Vir."
Nodding I say, "You must have questions. So do I. But you can go first."
It took the man a moment to think of a question he wanted to ask. When he was ready, he looked me in the eye and said, "I'm assuming you eat monster meat regularly right? How can you eat it without dying? Is there some kind of method?"
"Ah. Foraging in the apocalypse isn't easy, is it? Sorry to burst your bubble Mark but I have a skill that gives me some resistance to the corruption. Also, the meat tastes god awful. Could really do with some spices."
"I see… Then instead, where are you from."
…
Actually, I don't know how to answer that. Where am I from? I don't think he means my country of birth.
"If you're referring to what human settlement, I'm from then none. You two are the first humans I've met since this shit began." I wanted to say since I revived but that would add more confusion to the mix. And I might keep that part to myself for now as a revelation about death, grim reapers and godhood might make me sound crazy to these people.
"So, you've been living out here on your own this entire time!?", Vir finally got herself together enough to talk but she was still shocked. She seems like someone who doesn't take the lead unless she has to in these situations.
"Basically, yeah. Which is why my first question for you two is are you from a human settlement and how can join?"
…
"You want to join our city?"
"Yeah."
Mark took a sighed deeply for some reason before saying, "The city we are from is called Wesker, however, I wouldn't suggest going there."
"Mark!", Vir scolded.
"What? It's not like we can ask a price off him and withholding anything isn't going to help us here."
That silenced Vir. It seems she agreed, although, she was still clearly reluctant. I wonder what gossip he's got for me.
"Why shouldn't I go there?"
"You see, there is a threat approaching the city. We were 'sent' out to investigate this area, but they hid the details from us. Thing is we already know what's going on. There's a Giant heading in the direction of the city. If we manage to confirm the Giant's existence, we will be hightailing it out of here."
…
"A Giant?"
"Yes"
"As tall as the clouds?"
"Yeah…"
"Big shield and sword? Made of stone?"
"Yeah. Have you seen it?"
"I killed it."
"What?"
"I killed it."
I'm starting to enjoy the reaction these two have every time I drop nonsense on them. I can't wait until I get to the skeleton folk story, and the behemoth, and all the other crazy adventures I've had so far. Obviously, some things will have to be censored but surely I can have plenty of fun with these two none the less.
"You killed it?", Vir was the first to speak up. She was standing up, frozen stiff, unsure what to make of this information.
"I did. Although the entire thing didn't go how I had planned at all… That Giant was actually a Gargoyle, the Queen of them in fact. Her entire body was the nest for thousands of mini gargoyles which all tried to kill me. Of course, by mini I mean mini compared to the Queen's size. Each one of them was about two or three metres tall. If you go in that direction for about a week… I mean a month, assuming your slower than me, you'll find her corpse."
…
Crickets.
The revelation stunned them both so much that I swear the guy literally stopped breathing for a moment.
These two are hilarious. And oddly enough they don't seem to distrust my words too much. Maybe they aren't as crazy as I originally thought.
Since they both seemed preoccupied with their own thoughts, I decided to speak with Snow for a bit to catch him up on the situation.
We are getting better at this telepathy thing, but it'll still be some time before we can fine tune the details. Maybe we need to develop some kind of letter-based code similar to morse code for smoother transfer. But that would take time to decipher. I don't know, we'll figure something out.
Speaking to Snow, I could feel the tiny fox's amusement as I relayed the details of the conversation. After he calmed down, he suggested that I hire the two as informants and have them show me their city. Of course I would need to pay them, but gathering monster resources they'd like shouldn't be too hard.
Frankly I quite like the idea. Completely assimilating into human society is likely impossible for me at this point anyway. If the reactions these two have conclude anything about humans in this age, it's that I am far to powerful to be called one.
Shocker.
Furthermore, I don't have time to deal with the political repercussions if my strength became common knowledge. Even as a soccer player all that time ago, the nonsense I had to put up with was insane. Can you even imagine what it would be like now?
The thought gives me shivers.
None the less I am interested in human society. The plan is to keep my identity hidden as I explore the settlement and to use these two as informants. Of course, I'll pay them, either with information or materials. Whichever they prefer.
After a while, the two clowns finally got their thoughts together enough to ask a question.
"Mr Rey," spoke Mark, not sure about the Mr part though, "would it be possible for you to take us to the corpse. We would like to confirm its death. Of course we'll pay you however we can."
Pretending to think about it I stare off in the direction of the Queen's corpse. But really, I have already decided. I need more time to get to know these two before they'll be open to making a deal.
"Of course that works for me. And as for the price, I would like to ask that you show me around Wesker."
"Very well."