Chapter 356: Daily Life After Returning Home
Sheldon and his friends were stunned.
They were all just joking around, but you actually took off the Winter Soldier's arm! Aren't you afraid Captain America will come looking for trouble? That maniac even beat up Iron Man over his best buddy!
"My God, there really is a Winter Soldier in this world! Ron, tell me quickly, have you met any other Avengers? Can I get their autographs?" Sheldon immediately transformed into a giddy fanboy, crowding around Ron.
"If the Captain America you're talking about is the one who accidentally posted that banana picture on Twitter, there's a party in a few days that I can arrange for you to attend. And if you want to get in touch with the Justice League, you can go directly to my office and find my secretary, the one with the long legs.
Her real identity is actually Wonder Woman, daughter of Queen Hippolyta of the Amazonian island of Themyscira. I met her when my plane crashed on their island during a mission, and I brought her back to Los Angeles. If you open her closet, you can even see the Lasso of Truth that she brought from her hometown."
Sheldon gave him a look that said, "I don't believe you for a second, you old liar." Ron shrugged. Why is it that nowadays no one believes the truth?
"Ron, this looks like the real deal!" Howard, an engineer, immediately examined the robotic arm and came to a surprising conclusion.
"Of course," Ron nodded. "I don't know how close this thing is to the Winter Soldier's prosthetic arm. I know it's not made of vibranium, but I think it'll be way better than most prosthetics on the market right now. I've actually seen someone use this to stop bullets."
"It can definitely do it, baby!" Howard kissed the bullet hole in the prosthetic arm like some kind of pervert. "This is the best special alloy available! The entire Caltech lab doesn't even have 200 pounds of this stuff. And with this incredible design, I'd love to try it on myself."
"If you need it, I can chop off an arm for you right now." Ron's eye twitched. He was speechless at how these scientists' minds worked.
"No, no, no, I was just speaking hypothetically." Howard shrank back like a scared puppy, startled by Ron's threatening tone. "Are you planning to enter the prosthetics industry? Ron, with this robotic arm, I can make a few minor improvements and guarantee it'll be better than any prosthetic on the market."
"Nope, I don't have that plan. The prosthetics market is only so big, and these things are so expensive that only wealthy disabled people can afford them. This business might not lose money, but it certainly won't be wildly profitable. I think the most profitable business is always one with no overhead."
Ron casually handed Poppy's laptop to Howard as well. Luckily, those idiots from Kingsman hadn't even glanced at it, otherwise he would have had a lot more explaining to do.
"And what's this?" As a mechanical engineer, Howard was immediately captivated by the robotic arm, not even giving his best friend Rajesh a chance to touch it. Or rather, if it weren't for this passion, he wouldn't be in this field. He practically tossed aside the laptop Ron had brought out.
"That contains information on the robotic arm and various bionic robots, especially a robotic dog that can move just like a real dog. Pretty interesting stuff."
Ron had already hacked the computer and checked its contents on the way back. As expected, it contained several of the Golden Circle's advanced technologies.
However, the section on virus research bothered him. It contained too much data and information about experiments conducted on locals, the evil of which was utterly appalling. Ron promptly deleted that part of the data.
But Ron seemed to have forgotten one thing: all computers have a hard drive recovery function. If someone knew what had been on the computer…
Only Sheldon complained, "Hey! Save the comics for Comic Night. Tonight belongs to Dungeons & Dragons. Do you guys want to continue playing or not?"
Everyone returned to their seats and picked up their character sheets. Ron also took out his character notebook and sat down. Only Rajesh continued eating, still holding his plate.
"Rajesh, are you sure you want to finish that entire pie?"
"Maybe? Who cares?" Rajesh said irritably. "What's there to fight for in my life anyway?"
Leonard grumbled, "God, have you been watching Bridget Jones's Diary again?"
"No, it's just because everyone's settled down. Look, Sheldon has Amy, Howard's getting married soon, you're dating my sister, and Ron has countless girls." Rajesh's expression was downright melancholy.
Ron felt a little sorry for him: "Since Howard's getting married soon, I think he might pick one of his ex-girlfriends from his many inflatable dolls and give it to you."
"Jenny and Stella—you've met them, Rajesh. Which one do you want?" Howard said generously.
Ron was floored. This guy actually named all his dolls!
"Do you know whose fault it is that I'm so lonely?" Rajesh exploded. "It's the United States of America! Your movies and TV shows promised that the streets here would be full of beautiful blondes with big boobs."
"Eat that whole pie, and you'll have big boobs yourself."
"It's a good thing you watch Hollywood movies and TV shows. I can't even imagine what you'd do if you watched those low-budget productions with simple plots, featuring only one man and one woman or several people, where the production team was so broke they couldn't even afford to dress the actors."
"Forget it, I'm gonna play another day. Rajesh, if you're really that lonely, you could try asking Penny to set you up with someone. Howard did that, and it worked out pretty well. He's getting married soon."
Ron covered his face. He couldn't bear to watch Rajesh's frustrated, pathetic expression. He simply got up and put his coat back on. He couldn't play board games tonight, but that didn't mean he wouldn't find other ways to have fun—like with his two favorite girls who worked at the diner.
Since Caroline had crossed that line and accepted Ron, he hadn't really gotten much quality time with her. However, tonight was destined to be a frustrating night for him, as his two beauties were also in trouble.
In the Williamsburg diner, Max walked in excitedly: "I have great news! I searched the apartment again and found the original lease, and even my birth certificate! Turns out my father's name is 'Unknown'."
Caroline had been living with Max ever since her fall from grace, and Max's apartment lease had just expired. They'd gotten a call from the landlord earlier that day reminding them to renew.
That wasn't the real problem—they were broke, but they could still barely scrape together the rent.
"Never mind the lease! I just found a new place, a two-bedroom apartment on Sunset Boulevard for only $1,300 a month... wait... this is Sunset Boulevard in Bumfuck, Alabama. YUCK!"
Caroline finally saw the last line of fine print on her phone, realizing it was a knockoff Sunset Boulevard. She sighed in disappointment. Of course it was. What was she even hoping for?
"Listen, we can't lose that lease. Once the landlord finds out Lester Donovan isn't there anymore, the rent will go through the roof." Max was unusually serious. "Luckily, I found out the person on the lease is still alive, otherwise we'd be living in Ron's junkyard."
"No, I absolutely refuse to live in a junkyard," Caroline shook Max's hand desperately. "I've already lost my 20,000-square-foot mansion in Beverly Hills. If I end up living in a junkyard, I won't have the will to keep going."
"Don't worry, he lives in a nursing home near the Port of Los Angeles. We just need to go and kidnap him," Max said casually. "We can use a fishing rod with a donut on it and slowly reel him in."
"I don't think that's a good idea. Who are you planning to kidnap? Why not leave the problem to a professional?" Ron walked into the diner and headed straight for the two who were plotting their strategy. They didn't even notice him until he got close.
"Hey Ron, you're finally back," Caroline kissed Ron on the cheek. "That was Max's joke—she was actually planning to harass some poor old man."
"Looks like you two ran into some trouble. Can you tell me what happened?" Ron put his arm around Max's waist and kissed her too, keeping things fair.
Caroline took the opportunity to explain the whole situation.
"That's nothing," Ron said cheerfully. "This is easy as pie. You can move into the apartment building where we live. A unit just opened up recently."
Just imagine how awesome it would be if Caroline and Max moved into his building!
Not only could they have necessary academic discussions anytime, but even better, Max could help him prank Sheldon. Halloween was coming up soon, and if he could dress up as a ghost and scare Sheldon half to death, that would be more exciting for Ron than getting all his lady friends together for a wild poker game.
"No, Ron, you don't understand. We need a place with reasonable rent, and ideally, it should have a yard big enough for Chestnut. I absolutely cannot be separated from Chestnut."
Max's apartment looked like a dump, but for a rent of $1,300 a month, the size was unbelievable—not to mention the small yard accessible from the kitchen door.
Caroline's precious Chestnut could even take a walk and stretch her legs there!
This was incredible in Los Angeles, a city with some of the highest rents in the country.
"I don't want that either. If I could, I'd rather have Chestnut as my roommate and leave Caroline in a stable in the suburbs," Max chimed in.
"Alright, then there's only one option. You renew the lease, and I'll cover the extra cost, okay?"
"No, Ron, we agreed to be self-reliant. This is my last shred of dignity. If I agree to your help, how am I any different from those scantily clad women walking the streets?" Caroline raised her voice.
"Actually, technically speaking, they're also self-reliant when using certain positions," Ron muttered under his breath, utterly exasperated by Caroline's stubborn pride.
Of course, he understood Caroline's thinking: "Even though I'm down on my luck now, I still earn my own money through honest work. I will never depend on anyone else, and I would never sell my body."
Again, if Caroline wanted to go down that road, she would have done it ages ago.
High society was full of perverts who wanted to turn the wives and daughters of their former equals into their playthings. A fallen socialite always excited these creeps.
For this reason, they'd even created an island filled with underage girls they'd trafficked from all over the world, along with beautiful women like Caroline whose backgrounds provided a unique thrill.
"But I don't think going to the nursing home to bother that poor old man is a good idea. Do you have any better options?"
"I don't know, but I'm planning to go to the nursing home with Max first. Maybe we can have a reasonable conversation with Lester Donovan. I'm sorry, Ron, tonight…"
"I know, you're both not in the mood tonight." Ron nodded dejectedly. After the board game night at the apartment fell through, he'd lost another place to have fun.
However, what Ron didn't know was that after he left, Caroline had a new idea.
"Max! Max!" Caroline picked up a newspaper left by a customer on the table and shook Max violently: "I think we don't need to go to the nursing home tomorrow. I have a plan."
"If your plan is to go work the streets later, I have to remind you, that outfit isn't 'revealing' enough." Max, whose plans for fun with Ron tonight had been disrupted by Caroline, replied irritably.
"No, I meant this," Caroline handed the newspaper to Max. "We can try our luck at the racetrack. I used to go there all the time, I know it inside and out. If we do well, we won't have to worry about rent for a year!"
"No way, I absolutely won't let you enter Chestnut in that kind of race. Think about it—she's been cooped up in our little yard every day, never been outside for a single day. You're basically throwing money away."
"No, I meant betting on other horses," Caroline quickly shook her head. "I know about horse racing, and you happen to like gambling—we can give it a shot!"
"Oh, genius, so how are we going to get to the racetrack? By bus? Or should we both ride Chestnut there?" Max rolled her eyes. "That's a full sixty miles—you'll kill Chestnut."
"We can have Ron drive us."
"Then what are you waiting for? Ron just left, he hasn't gone far."
(End of Chapter)
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